


I Didn’t Mean to Fall in Love (But I Did)

by Helena_Hathaway



Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alternate Universe - Friends (TV) Fusion, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Attempt at Humor, Basically Frank is in love with Gerard but then he finds someone new and then Gerard falls for Frank, Best Friends, Denial, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, Friends (TV Show) AU, Friends to Lovers, Humor, Idiots in Love, Jealousy, Kind of FRIENDS AU, M/M, Masturbation, One-Sided Attraction, One-Sided Relationship, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Roommates, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2014-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-12 20:32:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 36
Words: 84,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2123694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helena_Hathaway/pseuds/Helena_Hathaway
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And they were <em>roommates</em>!</p>
<p>Oh my god, they were roommates.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Frank Loves Gerard

**Author's Note:**

> I have decided that four ongoing fics isn't enough. Five is good though. Five is a good number.
> 
>  
> 
> [](http://s1291.photobucket.com/user/Sexy_Bread_Tin/media/IDidntMeanToFallinLove_zps0d962737.png.html)  
> 

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What it says on the tin.

It’s not that Gerard is an idiot, and Frank knows that. He’s just... blind to just about everything. He doesn’t see anything that doesn’t affect him right then and there, and Frank knows that. It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate Frank. It’s not that he doesn’t like Frank. He just doesn’t see Frank. That’s all. He doesn’t see him. 

Frank wishes that Gerard saw him, but he doesn’t and that’s a fact of nature. Maybe someday he will. Frank is a wishful thinker though. Five years and Gerard’s never looked twice at him. Five years, and Gerard hasn’t looked twice at anyone at all.

Frank’s beginning to think that Gerard just isn’t into dudes, but he doesn’t seem to be into girls either. The only thing he seems to be interested in is his comic book collection.

He loves Gerard. He’d never admit to it, but it’s true. He loves Gerard. Not just as a brother or as a friend, or as anything, he _loves_ the guy. He loves Gerard so much that if Gerard asked, he’d marry him today. He’d marry him in a minute. It wouldn’t even take him a second to say yes, because he’s been in love with his roommate for years.

Frank watches him when he’s eating his cereal in the morning, and every single part of him wants to just jump up and kiss him. He watches the way Gerard sticks his tongue out of the corner of his mouth when he’s drawing. Frank loves the way he drifts off when they watch movies on Friday, and sometimes if he’s very very lucky, then Gerard’s head will fall onto his shoulder.

Gerard’s blind though. He doesn’t see the way Frank looks at him. He wouldn’t understand it if he saw the pure, unadulterated love there.

The sad thing is that everyone in the world seems to know about the crush except Gerard. It is literally as obvious as a giant lizard taking over a city. He doesn’t have the ability to hide it. Frank’s nearly swooned a few times just looking at him, but still Gerard doesn’t see it. Maybe he’s just not looking. Maybe he doesn’t care. Maybe he notices but he’s too sweet to crush Frank’s dreams.

Gerard has no idea, though Frank can’t be sure of that. Gerard just sees Frank as Frank.

Everyone knows though. Gerard’s brother even knows Frank’s in love with him. Their next door neighbors, two guys named Pete and Patrick, even know. Frank’s got quite possibly the worst case of love sickness in the entire world. Gerard wouldn’t see love if it wore a flashing light, hit him repeatedly in the face, and then tossed him into a canyon.

It’s ruining Frank’s life. 

“It’s just a little crush,” Frank tries to tell himself. There’s nothing little about it.

“You’ve got it bad,” Pete tells him, every time he sees Frank sighing after Gerard. Frank just nods, and mopes whenever he hears the words. 

There’s nothing he can really do about it though. It’s not like they have antibiotics to keep you from falling in love. There’s no cold spray that prevents you from having reoccurring dreams about fucking your roommate. There’s no bandage that can make him stop _wanting_ him.

Frank wishes there was some aspirin he could take to make it go away, but he’s checked time and time again. He would know, he gets sick far too much. He’s coming down with something as it is. Probably just a cold, but it could be anything.

Frank stares down at the Benadryl he’s rolling between his fingers. Every time he buys medicine he reminds himself how much he hates the taste of it, but he always ends up buying the liquid anyway. It’s cheaper. Frank likes cheap. It makes him want to gag, but still, it’s cheaper.

“Are you sick again?” Pete asks him with exasperation.

“When am I not?”

“About four days out of the year,” he replies.

“Hey, don’t be stingy! It’s more like five days,” Frank shrugs.

“That’s still not something you should go about bragging,” he replies.

“It’s just a cold,” Frank responds, and then sneezes.

“Ew, get you’re infected snot away from me,” Pete says, scooting his way over on the couch.

“Say that again and I will sneeze on your toothbrush.”

“That’s low,” Pete replies.

“What’s low?” Gerard asks stepping out of his bedroom. Frank looks at him like he’s an angel, which is how he sees him anyway. Gerard just walks across the apartment and over to the counter.

Mikey, Gerard’s brother, once told them that they’re apartment looks just like Chandler and Joey’s on Friends. That’s not exactly true, they have different furniture. It’s pretty close though. They could probably dress it in such a way that you’d think you were in that same apartment, but they decide not to. Partly because they’re not _that_ lame. Just don’t look in Gerard’s closet because he totally doesn’t have twenty stacks of comic books in there. Nope.

“Frank is low,” Pete says.

“Why? What did you do, Frank?” Gerard smiles, raising an eyebrow at Frank. 

He almost flubs up his words because that look is giving him chills, “I, um, just told Pete that he was a jerk.”

“Well Pete _is_ a jerk,” Gerard says.

“Fuck you both,” Pete crosses his arms, and Frank punches him in the arm.

“Are you going out? It’s movie night!” Frank asks when he sees Gerard pulling on a jacket.

“Yeah,” Gerard says looking back at Frank, “I’ll be back in a few. Don’t get into too much trouble while I’m gone.”

Pete inches over to Frank and whispers in his ear, “does that mean I’m not allowed to set fire to the kitchen?”

“I’d be much appreciated if you didn’t do that,” Frank tells him.

“Well that spoils my Friday night.”

“Your Friday night for the past three years has been fucking horror movie marathons. You are as much an arsonist as I am a florist,” Frank says.

“I didn’t know you were a florist,” Pete jokes.

“That’s the point, numbskull. I am not a florist, and you are not an arsonist.”

He sighs and gives Frank a look, “I could be if I wanted. Hey Gerard can I borrow a match or something?”

“You want me to lend you something dangerous? _You_ , Pete? I wouldn’t even give you a butter knife.”

“Why does no one trust me?”

“Because you set off the fire alarm last year while you were blow drying your hair,” Frank says.

“That was faulty wiring,” Pete defends.

“You have faulty wiring,” Frank scoffs.

“Whatever,” Pete rolls his eyes, “Gerard if you’re going to be out, just pick the pizza up yourself so we can save on tipping.”

“What makes you think I’m getting pizza?” he asks.

“Because we have gotten pizza every Friday for as long as we have lived in this apartment,” Frank says.

“Repetition is what makes the world go round, bro,” Pete says, “and if you want to live to see tomorrow, you will buy me pizza.”

“Fair enough,” Gerard shrugs, grabbing the door knob to leave.

“Oh and maybe a movie,” Frank says.

“Yeah otherwise we’ll end up watching porn,” Pete says.

“We will not!” Frank yelps. “I don’t think we have any porn anyway.”

“Everyone has porn,” Pete says.

“You realize that we would not find it agreeable even if we did have any,” Frank says.

“Oh right,” Pete nods, and then calls over to Gerard, “We do not want any porn!”

“I don’t even know why we invite him over,” Gerard shakes his head.

“Because his roommate is adorable, and we don’t want to offend him by just hanging out with Patrick,” Frank says.

“I resent that!”

“Good.”

“Okay, so pizza, a movie but not porn, anything else?” Gerard asks.

“One million dollars,” a new voice says, and Frank turns his head to see Patrick in the doorway.

“I’d like that too, Gerard. Get me that too!”

Gerard shakes his head like he’s asking god why he’s even in this situation, and Patrick just grins at him then walks across the room, and sits on the armrest of the couch. There’s an advert for tampons on the TV, but the volume is too quiet to hear about the wonder of feminine hygiene products.

“I’m going to get out of here before one of you asks for a dinosaur,” Gerard says.

“Oh get me a dinosaur!” Frank screams, before the door slams.

“Why do you need a dinosaur?”

“Because they’re cool.”

“Have you seen Jurassic Park? It’s not going to work out too well,” Pete reminds him.

“I’ll tame it, and it’ll be like a giant dog. We’re not allowed dogs in this building, but the rules say nothing about long extinct giant reptilian creatures,” Frank says.

“What are you going to call it?” Patrick asks.

“Winston.”

“Why Winston?”

“Why not?” Frank retorts.

“I’d have thought you’d name it Gerard,” Pete shrugs.

“Why? Because he’s in love with him?” Patrick asks.

“I’m not in love with anyone,” Frank says.

“No, you just want his babies.”

“Well I can’t actually have his babies. I have a detrimental lack of a uterus if you hadn’t noticed,” Frank responds.

“But you totally want his babies,” Pete repeats.

“I hate you both,” Frank says.

“But you don’t deny it,” Patrick points out.

“Frank is a good person. He may have a gigantic, all-consuming, hopeless, and somewhat desperate crush on his roommate, but he’s not going to lie about it. That would be rude,” Pete states.

“Not to mention Gerard is probably not into dudes. Or chicks. Or anyone else for that matter,” Patrick says.

He’s not technically wrong, but he’s also not technically right either. It’s not something he parades about, and it’s true that Gerard’s never had a significant other, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t _want_ one.

Frank hears him sometimes, so he knows the guy isn’t completely asexual as he makes himself out to be. The walls are thin between their rooms, so he hears it all. He hears the little moans. The hisses. The breathing that gets caught in his throat. The curse words. No man has ever been able to make a swear word sound as dirty as Gerard in the middle of the night jerking himself off. What Frank wouldn’t give to be in the room with him when it happened.

He’ll wake up from dreams about Gerard and it’ll feel a million times more desperate. All he wants in the entire world is to curl up next to Gerard and wake up in his arms. But he doesn’t get that. Instead he gets middle of the night spasms with a tent under his comforter, and a vague image left in his head of Gerard on his knees.

In those dreams Frank has everything. He has the most beautiful man in the entire world, holding onto Frank’s hip with one hand and the base of his cock in the other. Frank’s hands are always wrapped up in Gerard’s hair, tugging on those black locks, soft from his shampoo, and begging to be pulled. If he had a nickel for every wet dream he’s woken up from involving that gorgeous man, he’d have had enough money to buy his own apartment, and a therapist to help him get rid of those lingering thoughts about his best friend.

Really though, Frank can’t help it. Gerard is perfect, and he’s gorgeous, and Frank wants him. He doesn’t just want him sexually, he could live a million years impotent if it meant that he got to steal one single kiss from Gerard. He’d give up his life savings, his home, the shirt on his back, and his job just to be with Gerard as more than a friend.

He has no such luck though. Frank has a dead-end job at a diner, and a crush on his hopelessly uninterested roommate. It’s not even a crush at this point, it’s a disaster.

It would be inaccurate to say however, under either heavy or subtle scrutiny that Gerard does not _care_ about Frank. He cares an awful lot about the guy, but he doesn’t love him.

“Frank?” Pete pokes him in the side, “You’ve been drifting off. Dreaming about Gerard again?”

“Yeah,” Frank frowns, “I mean no. Oh, who am I kidding?”

“No one,” Pete shakes his head.

“Then yeah,” Frank sighs again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know who is going to like this, if anyone. It's something simple for me to do though. Please leave a comment if you're interested in more!


	2. Frank Needs A Boyfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard thinks Frank needs a boyfriend. Mikey thinks so too.

“So how’s the obsessive unrequited crush on my brother going?” Mikey asks.

“Oh, you know. Pretty good. I should be having an existential crisis any day now,” Frank replies, and then sneezes.

“Yuck, you’re sick,” Mikey replies.

“Your face is sick.”

“I know you meant that as an insult, but isn’t sick what the kids these days call ‘cool’ in slang?”

“Go away,” Frank says, throwing a tissue at him. Mikey makes a face, but the tissue is flimsy so it doesn’t make it that far.

“I shan’t go away, I’m visiting my brother,” Mikey says, “you know him, he’s the guy you’re in love with.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know who you’re referring to,” Frank says. Gerard went down stairs to get the mail, at which point Mikey then promptly made fun of Frank’s undying love for an idiot who might as well have horse blinders.

“Frank!” Gerard says as he slams the door.

“What?” Frank asks looking up at him.

“Mail.”

“Well I would assume so, didn’t you just go out to get it?”

Gerard rolls his eyes, “alright smartass.”

“Did I get anything exciting?”

“A coupon for K-mart,” Gerard says, “a bill, seventeen magazine-”

“I am not subscribed to that!” Frank says.

“No, Pete and I got it for you,” Mikey says, “I thought you’d appreciate it.”

“Why on earth would I want a magazine meant for teenage girls?” Frank asks, looking at him expectantly.

“Has tips on getting yourself a boyfriend,” Mikey says, “which you are in dire need of.”

“I am single, and I like it!” Frank says, but obviously he doesn’t. He doesn’t want to be taken though unless it’s Gerard. Frank’s life is a sad continuing story of a lonely boy who wants nothing more than his best friend. It’s quite depressing actually. There’s a whole genre of music devoted to his yearning. It’s called Taylor Swift’s breakup playlist.

“You do need a boyfriend, Frank,” Gerard says, shuffling through the rest of the stack and sorting his mail from Frank’s. Frank blushes, and tries to play it off as a cough a moment later, but Mikey gives him this slanted look.

“I’m perfectly fine,” Frank says, “I don’t need someone else in my life to be complete. I am a strong individual.”

“Who don’t need no man,” Mikey says teasingly.

Frank frowns, “you’re mean.”

“I’m not saying you need someone to be complete, I’m saying it would make you happy,” Gerard shrugs, finally throwing the mail on the counter dejectedly. He walks over to the couch, and realizes there’s no space left for him, because Mikey’s put his feet up.

“Budge over, would you,” Gerard says.

“Why?” 

“Because it’s my apartment,” Gerard replies.

“It’s Frank’s apartment too,” Mikey shrugs.

“You’re right. Frank, would you tell Mikey to move over?” Gerard asks, looking at him, and there’s no way in hell he could ever say no to those eyes.

“Kay,” Frank says, rather dreamily, making Mikey nearly gag, “Move over, Mikey.”

“Sometimes I feel like the whole world is against me,” Mikey says melodramatically. He scoots down anyway, and Gerard sits down between them, pulling his foot up next to him. Frank can’t help but look at his roommate, and wish he could grab the guy and kiss him. He wants that more than just about anything.

The TV is almost always on in the apartment. Not because anyone ever actually watches it, but because it would be too quiet without the background noise. It’s just a permanent thing from between the hours of eight in the morning to midnight.

For reasons unknown to anyone, there’s always someone in their apartment who doesn’t live there. Frank will wake up and there’s almost always _someone_ there. Whether that’s Mikey, Pete, Patrick, or a series of other friends that come in and out, there’s just always someone there. It’s a hub, like a train station, or a coffee shop. It’s weird. It means that they spend far more than they really should on potato chips.

“I think you could do with a boyfriend though, Frank,” Gerard says offhandedly, as he tries to look through one of the letters they got.

“Yeah, Frank. Listen to Gerard.”

“Why should I? Gerard isn’t expected to date anyone, why should I?”

“Because I don’t really want someone, but you totally do, Frank. You’re a hopeless romantic,” Gerard says.

“I am not a hopeless romantic!”

“I know you watched Letters to Juliet at 3 in the morning last night, Frank. You can’t hide from me,” Gerard shakes his head.

“Dude, that’s sad,” Mikey says.

“I did not! How... why do you... I didn’t!” Frank splutters.

“Oh really?” Gerard says skeptically, “so if I were to grab your laptop and opened the disc drive, I wouldn’t find the DVD in there?”

“I would rather you didn’t touch my computer, thank you very much,” Frank says, turning red again. He sneezes, and it makes his eyes a little disoriented for a moment, but when he comes to, he sees Gerard looking gorgeous in front of him. He just sees Gerard actually, but there’s nothing Gerard can do that Frank won’t find gorgeous.

“Why do you even own that movie?” Mikey asks.

“It was on sale at Walmart!” Frank says.

“But you’d have saved even more money if you hadn’t bought it at all,” Mikey retorts.

“I’m not going to have a debate with you on what I choose and choose not to buy. Besides, who are you to regulate my purchases, because I’m pretty sure you have eaten half of the things I’ve bought for five years,” Frank says.

“Well if you don’t want me to eat your food, than you should put a lock on the cabinets,” Mikey says.

“That wouldn’t work for me, because when I wake up in the middle of the night to have a grilled cheese, I’m not capable of unlocking shit,” Gerard says.

“Who makes grilled cheese in the middle of the night?”

Frank sighs, “You don’t know your brother as well as I do, I guess. He’s burned his thumb like six times because he tries to do it without turning the lights on!”

“That’s one of the many reasons why it’s best that Gerard does not have a love interest,” Mikey says, playing it off as a joke, but Frank knows he’s trying to take a slight dig at him. It’s not that Mikey particularly cares one way or another whether Frank is in love with his brother or not, but he loves to make fun of Frank for it. Mikey probably couldn’t care less though.

“I could get a boyfriend anytime I want,” Frank says, “I just choose not to.”

“Maybe I could try to find someone for you,” Gerard suggests.

“Oh god, not another one of your setups,” Frank says. Truthfully, Gerard is the sweetest human in the world and usually finds people Frank would like anyway, but it makes him sick to his stomach. It makes him sick knowing that Gerard honestly and truly doesn’t see him as anything but a friend. Why else would he set the guy up? Frank despises it more than anything, because he doesn’t want to be setup with Gerard’s friend or coworker. He wants to someday walk into a blind date that was made for him, and find Gerard waiting there.

“Why not?” Gerard groans, “You’re not the kind of guy who wants to be a bachelor for the rest of his life! Just, like, please?”

Frank mumbles something, and looks anywhere but at Gerard, because if he looks too hard at him he’d agree to anything. He’d agree to burn down a city or commit a murder if he looked at Gerard for longer than he has to. He’s like the sun. You can’t quite look directly at him, because he’ll blind you. Not with brightness, though he has the brightest smile in the world, but with sheer beauty.

Saying that Frank’s got it bad is the understatement of the century.

“I,” Frank starts, “no. not now.”

“What are you waiting _for_?” Mikey asks, and there’s a double layer to that question that Gerard also doesn’t see. Mikey is asking him, rather inconspicuously, when he’s going to give up on Gerard. Frank knows he’ll have to, he’s known for four and a half years, but still, he doesn’t learn his lesson. No one will ever be good enough for him if it’s not Gerard.

“I just can’t,” Frank says, and the words go straight over Gerard’s head. Really, he’s an enormous idiot when it comes to Frank’s affection.

“You’re going to have to accept the nature of the world as it is someday, Frank,” Mikey sighs.

“I’m not there yet though,” Frank replies, “and I don’t want to be setup with anyone.”

“But what if he’s cute?” Gerard asks.

“Polar bears are cute. Teddy bears are cute. Babies are cute! I’ll get by with google images to suit my cute quota.”

“You’re hopeless in so many ways,” Mikey rolls his eyes.

“Well he’s a true romantic,” Gerard says, “He’s probably waiting to step into a chick flick rather than go out there and achieve it himself. He’s waiting for some random guy on the street to save his life, and then they go out for coffee, and fall in love with each other.”

“Ew. That’s horribly cliché.”

Gerard rolls his eyes, “That’s the point, Frank’s watched every rom com under the sun. He wants that for himself.”

Frank grimaces, because that’s not true. He wants a When Harry Met Sally sort of relationship. He wants to fall in love with his best friend. That’s not technically true, he’s already there, but he wants Gerard to fall in love with his best friend. He wants to pull a Ross and Rachel. Frank would end up being Ross, which isn’t exactly ideal in his opinion. He’s been in love with Gerard’s Rachel for what feels like forever.

“He’s waiting for his prince to come,” Gerard jokes.

Frank wants to cry at the feeling in his stomach. This feeling of want and emptiness, like he hasn’t eaten in six years, but what he’s craving is to be with Gerard. It hurts, and it’s actually quite painful loving Gerard. It makes him want to cry every other day, but he keeps telling himself that one day he’ll be able to get over it. He’ll cross that bridge, and he’ll leave Gerard on the other side of the river. The river is ferocious though, and every time he tries, he just falls in and has to start all over.

“ _Maybe my prince already has come, but he doesn’t see the crown on his head_ ,” Frank thinks to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got to stop naming fics after Plain White T's songs because no one knows any of their songs.


	3. Gerard Plays Nurse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kind of fluffy. I mean that both literally and figuratively.

Frank is practically a zombie on the couch. It wasn’t just a cold as Frank had said. It’s nothing serious, but he can’t really leave the building, because it’s too cold. It’s not even that cold, but Frank goes into a fit when he leaves the apartment. He keeps sneezing, and coughing. He’s also pretty sure that he’ll lose his voice soon because he has too much phlegm in his throat.

“You know if you’d have gone to the doctor when you started sneezing you might be better off now,” Gerard says, looking down at Frank sadly.

“Don’t patronize me, I’m sick,” Frank mopes, voice sounding stuffy and nasal.

“I’m sorry,” Gerard says honestly, “I didn’t mean to be mean. Do you need anything?”

Frank keens dejectedly, and wraps himself tighter in a pile of blankets. He’s trying to remember when he bought a Spiderman blanket, but he decides that it’s probably Gerard’s. It wouldn’t surprise him.

“Do you want anything?”

“I don’t know,” Frank says.

“I mean, I could get you food. Soup? Like, I’ll get you nice soup from a restaurant or something instead of the stuff that comes in a can, because you’re sick. You deserve nice soup when you feel shitty,” Gerard says.

Frank sighs, because he always feel shitty. He’s in love with his roommate, so of course he always feels shitty. He should always have soup.

“I’m not sure I want soup,” he replies. Frank has trouble finding good soup. He’s a vegetarian, which kind of minimizes the soup spectrum. Basically there’s different varieties of soggy vegetables, and that’s about it.

Gerard frowns sympathetically, “I’m sorry you don’t feel good, Frankie.”

Frank tries to hide himself in the layers, smiling at how adorable Gerard is. He’s always adorable, but he loves the way Gerard is considerate.

Frank is always getting sick. Gerard’s acutely aware of his dysfunctional immune system, which has a habit of torturing the man at least every month or two. He’ll be huddled up on the couch with a box of tissues and a paper grocery bag for discard, but it’s become something he’s greatly used to.

Gerard kind of likes being the nurse though. He likes getting to take care of Frank, so flimsy and helpless. This is the only time when he sees Frank so weak and in need, and though Frank is nothing more than his best friend, it quite entices and calms him. He likes making Frank soup, and watching him go through hour after hour of Sci-fi movie marathons, because apparently horror is too much when he’s sick.

Frank is always very thankful and warm when he’s ill. He respects that Gerard need not take care of him as he does, and the fact that Gerard is so willing makes him so appreciative. Gerard could just as easily avoid him or sleep elsewhere for a week, afraid of catching whatever virus Frank’s acquired this time, but he doesn’t. He takes care of Frank, and he’s happy to do so.

Gerard always realizes how much he does truly value Frank’s company in moments like these. It’s more days than it is moments, because Frank never seems to get the 24 hour virus, but he still likes knowing Frank’s around. He likes knowing that Frank is his best friend, and likes knowing that he’s always just a room away, were he to ever need him.

He used to need Frank a little more, during the time he spent sobering up. Through it all, it was Frank that got him through that, and maybe he feels a bit like he owes Frank in that respect. Gerard knows completely, that Frank would never expect him to be there when he’s sick, because Frank is far too good a person. He only really wanted to help Gerard during detox, but the fact that he helped is what makes Gerard so fond of the guy. He didn’t have to, in the same respect that Gerard doesn’t have to help Frank, but he did, and that’s what counts.

Those had been some days he likes to banish from his mind. Thinking back to who he had been, it all seems very cringe worthy, but he can’t change the past. Gerard had woken Frank up in the middle of the night on countless occasions with nothing more than just a need to cry into a shoulder, and Frank let him. It would be three in the morning, Frank would have work tomorrow morning, and he’d let Gerard just sob it out, and he’d be there for him.

Frank is the most important person in the world to Gerard, in every sense. While he loves his brother almost as much, it’s Frank who’s never been required to be there for him. When you’re a little kid you don’t pick your family, but you usually end up loving them anyway, so he was stuck with Mikey. He loves the guy, but still it wasn’t by choice that they grew up together, and Frank is different.

Frank is just his roommate, he never had to bond with or hang out with the guy, but he did, and he’ll never regret how close they’ve become. Gerard knows that Frank is excruciatingly important to him, and in a lot of ways he cannot fathom ever living without him. In every comedy or sitcom he’s ever seen, there would be roommates who would eventually move on with their lives after living together, and that would be it. They remain friends, but they don’t live together.

Gerard is at a place in his life where he doesn’t need a roommate anymore. He’s got enough money that he could survive on his own, but he would never want to be without Frank. Some part of him is attached to the guy. He’s always there for him, and Gerard wouldn’t have it any other way.

So he really loves getting to take care of Frank, as weird as it might sound. He doesn’t like that Frank gets sick, but he likes that Frank trusts him to be there.

“I’ll get you whatever you want,” Gerard says walking over to the counter and resting his head on his hands. Frank takes up most of the couch, but he doesn’t mind.

“Well you never got me that million dollars,” Frank shrugs.

“Or the dinosaur,” Gerard jokes.

“I was going to name the dinosaur Winston.”

“Why Winston?” Gerard asks giggling.

Frank blinks a few times, because he’s pretty sure he had this conversation the other day. He’s had a lot of cold medicine though, so he might be dreaming or making things up.

“I just think any dinosaur would be lucky to have a name like Winston.”

Gerard grins at the Frank shaped lump, with only the smallest bit of his hair poking up above the couch.

“You’re right. It’s very prestigious,” Gerard says, “after Churchill?”

“No of course not,” Frank replies, “Dinosaurs came way before Winston Churchill.”

Gerard snorts, “of course. I can’t believe I forgot!”

“Duh. Like, the Mesozoic era was about 65 million years before World War II, Gerard. Get with the times.”

“You’re an idiot, Frank,” Gerard shakes his head, still grinning.

“I’m sick!” Frank says, almost like a war cry or something. He’s a little loopy from the meds.

“Do you want to go to bed?”

Frank stares at the wall, tries to think of something, but he sneezes instead.

“Do you need more tissues?”

“Why? So I can build a fortress out of my snot?” Frank asks, “Javert ain’t getting past my barricade with all the mucus inside it.”

“Frank, gross. Why do you make so many literary references when you’re ill?”

Frank shrugs, “I kind of want a milkshake.”

Gerard rolls his eyes again, “do you want me to get you one?”

“I don’t know,” Frank replies, “no. Yes. I want a milkshake.”

“You must be a joy to be around when you’re stoned,” Gerard teases.

“I don’t know, Gerard. I have a lot of Dayquil in my system, I think I might be high as it is,” Frank says, but he’s just kind of tired. His inhibitions go down a little when he wants to be asleep.

“You are the strangest person I’ve ever met,” Gerard says, but he grabs his jacket.

“Where are you going?” Frank asks, turning his head.

“I’m going to get you your milkshake,” Gerard says.

“Oh,” He says, “but I want you to stay here.”

“I can’t get you a milkshake and stay here though,” he replies.

Frank frowns, “then stay here.”

“Frank,” Gerard groans, “are you sure?”

“Yeah,” Frank says, “I’m cold. Milkshake will make me colder. Stay here!”

Gerard sighs, and shrugs his jacket off, throwing it back on the hanger, but it slips and falls to the floor. Frank watches him pick it up dazedly, and tries to keep his eyes open, because he hadn’t noticed how sleepy he was.

“Frank, you can hardly keep yourself awake,” Gerard says when he walks up to stand behind the couch.

“No, I’m fine,” Frank says, through a yawn that does nothing to prove his point. It actually does quite the opposite, because Gerard gives him a look.

“C’mon, Frankie,” Gerard says walking around the couch, “you should go to bed.”

“Don’t wanna,” Frank says childishly. He doesn’t want to go to bed at two though. It’s barely afternoon, he would feel like a kid. He’s behaving like one, but he doesn’t care enough to try to change it right now.

“Frank, you’ll be more comfortable,” Gerard says with a lecturing sort of voice that reminds Frank of his mother. It’s cuter when Gerard says it though.

“Get up, Frank,” Gerard says, grabbing onto Frank’s hand which resurfaced from the wave of cascading blankets. Frank looks quite comfortable actually, but the number of layers seem like they’d be stiflingly hot. Gerard can’t help but picture Frank boiling up under there, but he looks content so he doesn’t say anything.

Frank doesn’t relent to Gerard’s gentle tug on his arm, he just collapses further into the corners of the couch. He’s quite stubborn when he wants to be, which is most of the time. He mewls and tries to take his hand back.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go to your own bed?” Gerard asks, letting his grip loosen.

“No! It’s too far,” Frank says willfully.

Gerard sighs, and tries to take his hand back, but Frank pulls him onto the couch next to him. He doesn’t seem to even consciously remember doing it, he just huddles back into his cocoon.

“God, you are so obstinate when you’re sick,” Gerard tells him, and Frank smiles at him tiredly. Gerard smiles back at him, because he’s kind of adorable.

“Alright, Frank. You win,” Gerard says, looking at the man sitting next to him, who’s nearly dozing off.

“I win!” Frank says halfheartedly, raising a fist in victory. “You lose.”

“Does that make me a loser?”

Frank thinks for a moment than shakes his head, “no I like you, you’re not a loser.”

“Well I’m glad.”

“Mhm,” Frank responds, but he drifts off less than a few seconds later. Gerard’s almost impressed by how quickly he crashed, but he doesn’t mind.

Frank rustles around in his sleep a minute later, trying to adjust himself in the creases of the sofa and Gerard watches him. The blankets fell down below his chin, and his nose is looking pretty red. He looks way colder than he really should be under so many layers. He shivers slightly, and his head droops onto his shoulder awkwardly.

Gerard questions whether he should try to find another blanket, but he doubts it would really do much of anything to help. He’s kind of restless though, moving around, and kicking his feet, which pushes his blankets onto the ground. Gerard leans down and tries to recover Frank, but Frank doesn’t look very comfortable.

He doesn’t look comfortable that is, until his head falls onto Gerard’s shoulder. The bone of Gerard’s shoulder squishes Frank’s face a bit, but he looks happy about it.

Considering Frank is quite literally dead-asleep, it’s a pretty sly move for an unconscious guy to make. Gerard suppresses a laugh at the way Frank looks so satisfied. He’s not exactly going to move and make Frank fall flat, so Gerard just sighs, and shuffles through channels with the TV remote. He doesn’t want to wake up Frank, so he tries to keep himself as still as he can.

Frank would kick himself if he found out that the only opportunities he ever gets to cuddle with Gerard are handed to him when he’s got a fever of one hundred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I got included on the twitter badmcrfics, but you know what? Fuck that. I'm not a bad author, and I am not going to be upset about it like I thought I was going to be. Fuck that twitter, I'm not a bad author just because you take my work out of context.


	4. Frank Almost Dies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He’s waiting for some random guy on the street to save his life, and then they go out for coffee, and fall in love with each other.”

Unfortunately for Frank, he has to work on Monday. Sunday had been a hellish combination of fever dreams and snot, and Monday is shaping up to be a miserable day of being yelled at by customers. Yes, the customer is always right, but if you think for one second that Frank is afraid of spitting in your coffee than you’ve got another thing coming to you.

He really shouldn’t be complaining. He does have really good hours. Somehow Frank lucked out and almost never has to work on weekends, which is fantastic. He does have to get up at five in the morning four days out of the week though, but at least he does have the weekend. Frank has an early shift, which ends right before the dinner rush, but when you work at a diner, it’s the breakfast rush that really kills you. Usually you get disgruntled people who do not work well without caffeine.

Frank just turns his back and wishes one particular messy looking guy an awful day. It’s no one’s fault but his own that he’s going to have whatever cold Frank caught. You don’t yell at the guy getting your coffee, if you don’t want to be treated like shit. Frank doesn’t have remorse, he’s not in a good mood.

Usually it’s the really rude people that Frank disregards, but he’s especially irritable today so he does have to take some of the blame. It’s not his fault that his sinuses are blocked and he burned himself on the coffee pot this morning. The second one actually is his fault, but he’s kind of dizzy. He misjudged the distance between his hand and the pot.

Frank gets off early because he is apparently a ‘hazard to everyone around him’ and also ‘looks like he slept on the underside of a truck.’ Frank doesn’t argue, he just clocks out and runs out of the building before his boss can reconsider. Really though, he’s a bad enough waiter as it is, he was likely to serve a shoe or something if his fatigue persisted.

Frank’s not really looking where he’s going as he gets away from the small diner. He just knows that he wants to be far away from it, and that’s good enough for his feet to take him there. The ground is slippery given the weather, but Frank is indifferent to it.

It’s a wonder Frank doesn’t cause more accidents with the way he behaves on the street. He just doesn’t look, so you’d think he’d have been involved in a few, but the fact is that he never has. He doesn’t expect to ever be in the way though, so he just doesn’t remember to even look both ways sometimes. He’ll look one way, and if the road is clear he goes. Frank’s a walking hazard to anyone with a large automobile. Or anyone _without_ a large automobile. He’s a hazard to basically everyone with a pulse.

So it’s no surprise that Frank very nearly steps into oncoming traffic, especially considering the fact that his senses are already dulled from being sick. It’s really pretty amazing that he doesn’t step into oncoming traffic more often. Statistically he really should have been run over a few dozen times by now. Frank’s pretty lucky though, and he’s escaped death pretty well over the years.

Today is different. He almost steps in front of a car, and he nearly dies, because this time, Frank didn’t step in front of a car that slammed on the breaks. He’s a driver’s worst nightmare, he doesn’t have any respect for those in cars, and he thinks of himself as indestructible.

So it’s safe to say that Frank walks right onto the street without thinking about it. He doesn’t see the car only a few yards away from him, and really, he should die right here and now, because he’s a bit of an idiot. He doesn’t see it, and he really should just be run over.

Frank isn’t run over though. Of course he isn’t. He’s too lucky to be run over, though he probably wouldn’t describe it that way if you asked him.

The question now becomes how Frank survived being hit by a car if he didn’t look, and the driver of said car has no time to slam the breaks? The answer of course would be in a third party.

Frank is pulled back onto the sidewalk, like a jolt at his arm, and for a very long moment he’s too miffed to even realize what’s just happened. He sees the car, and feels the wind hit him as it passes only a foot in front of him. He sees the driver flip him the bird, and he can’t figure out why. Then he realizes that he was just right in front of that car. He should be a pancake right now, but he’s not.

Frank looks down at himself to confirm that he is still in one piece. He has no tire tracks on him, he has ten toes, and equally as many fingers. Frank’s brain is working in overtime after taking a long hiatus, and it’s coming up short. How on earth can he be alive?

He distinctly remembers someone’s hand on his elbow pulling him back, with quite a bit of force, and he’s trying to figure out if that was his imagination or not.

“You okay?” A voice asks, and Frank’s fairly sure that he didn’t ask himself that. He’s pretty close to wigging the fuck out at the near death experience, so it’s possible that he asked himself, until he decides that his voice doesn’t sound like that. The voice was male, but that’s about as far as the similarities go. For one thing, Frank is fairly sure that the voice had an accent. European, but not English. Also it was lighter, warmer, and kind of felt syrupy and smooth.

He turns around and finds the owner of said voice. To be honest, Frank kind of just thinks he’s in heaven and he actually got hit by the car. He got hit by the car, and now he’s seeing an angel or something, because he’s dead. It’s so demeaning this way. Hit by a car while he’s got a cold, when really he’d always pictured himself going out with a bang. Well there probably was a bang when his skull cracked on the pavement, but that’s not the kind of death he wanted. He’d imagined something more prestigious.

There’s only one person on the corner of the sidewalk where Frank now stands. There’s a few people on the other side of the street, but this side is pretty clear, and no one is immediately near him apart from the guy.

The man in front of him, isn’t tall, but Frank is short, so relative to Frank he’s a giant. He’s probably average height. He’s taller than Gerard, Frank is sure of that much at least. He knows precisely how tall Gerard is, and he’s embarrassingly good at imagining Gerard stand next to people, and he’ll get the height dead on. It’s kind of sad.

Other than his really unexciting height, the man has got a lot about him that’s fairly extraordinary. For one thing, his face is nice enough for Frank to believe that it belongs to an angel. He’s a mix between gorgeous and _really_ fucking gorgeous. He has dark skin, short black hair, and green-blue eyes that could probably stop traffic by themselves. He’s smartly dressed, with shoes that are quite possibly more expensive than four months of Frank’s rent, and he can’t be much older than Frank.

“Did you just save my life?” Frank stumbles out.

The guy looks at Frank concerned, and Frank starts to realize he really should be dead, and that’s probably pretty mind-blowing. After he pinches his leg he’s fairly sure that he didn’t actually get hit by that car. He’d probably be kind of sore if he were, though he has no idea what death is like. He’s not dead which is hard to believe.

“I guess?” the guy replies, and Frank breathes in deeply. It’s kind of hard to rearrange your thoughts after almost dying. His head is spinning and his thoughts are drifting, so he has a hard time concentrating on the guy in front of him. Really though, he’s pretty good looking. A smoldering face, and Frank decides absently that he’s the kind of guy who looks good without a shirt.

“Dude,” Frank says, because he can’t breathe. He needs to lean on something, because he’s started wheezing. Being sick and almost dying do not combine well for his already shitty lungs.

“Are you okay?” the man asks again, and Frank decides he’s French. He sounds French. Frank had never realized how pretty that accent sounds, but it’s nice. It sounds very elegant, and now he’s trying to remember if he’s ever even met someone French. He really doesn’t think so. The French teacher they had at his high School was from Ohio. Frank didn’t even take French, and he’s trying to focus on the situation, because his mind is really drifting again.

Frank has trouble with the whole talking thing so he just repeats, “dude!”

“Seriously, you seem like you’re having some sort of mental break,” the guy says, staring at Frank worriedly.

Frank’s eyes widen and he tries to wave that away, “no, I’m like... freaking out though, man. Like, I almost _died_. That car would have, like, run me over!”

“Yeah, probably.”

“Thank you!” Frank says, feeling guilty that he forgot to say it already, “Oh man, thank you so much. I would’ve died if you hadn’t been there.”

“You’re welcome, I guess?” he replies, still looking worried about Frank’s mental health.

“God, I feel like an idiot. I just nearly got killed by a car! That’s just, wow. Did I say thanks?”

“Twice,” he says.

“Really?” Frank asks, “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he replies, trying not to smile at the flustered Frank in front of him. Frank’s eyes are wide, and he’s fairly fidgety like he’s trying to shake off the fact that he nearly died.

Frank nods, “it’s just a lot to take in. You don’t exactly expect to almost die, and get saved by a stranger. It’s kind of a heavy thing to wrap your head around. But thanks. Fuck, I said that already. Thanks anyway.”

“It’s okay, honestly. I couldn’t exactly watch you get hit by a car could I?” he says.

“Well, given my situation, I’m really glad you didn’t let me get hit by a car, but I see where you’re coming from,” Frank says, “oh god, you think I’m an idiot or something don’t you.”

“No, its fine,” he says, suppressing a laugh at Frank.

“I probably come across as mental or stupid though. I’m really not, ugh, like, I should shut up.”

“I don’t think you’re an idiot, I think you’re in shock,” he says.

“Yeah, that sounds about right. Oh god, I’m wasting your time, aren’t I? You probably have somewhere to be,” Frank says. He hadn’t realized that he’d walked far from the curb, but now he’s standing on the other side of the sidewalk. The guy who just saved his life is more in the middle, only a few feet from Frank.

“It’s not a problem, I have a long lunch break. Don’t worry,” he says.

“Okay. Well, I’m sorry for interrupting your break anyway. I do appreciate the whole life saving thing though, like wow, that’s a pretty nice thing to do.”

He actually does laugh because Frank’s having trouble with words right now, and it’s kind of entertaining.

“Yeah, I’m kind of an idiot,” Frank states, “I’m Frank by the way.”

“Aaron,” the guy says, and now Frank has a name to put to the face of the guy who just saved his life. He’s very pretty. Frank’s getting lost in his own head just thinking about him.

“Wow, so you saved my life,” Frank says, “I honestly cannot thank you enough for that. For my life.”

“It’s fine. You’re okay, I don’t need a grand recognition, it’s okay,” he replies, and Frank tries to remember to attach the name Aaron to his face.

“No really, thank you,” Frank replies, and he’s actually annoying himself with how many times he’s said that. “Can I, like, buy you a coffee or something?”

“If you’ll stop gushing with the thank you’s, then I guess that would be okay,” he says, and Frank blushes.

“I’m sorry. I should shut up,” Frank says, “god, I’m awkward. I don’t mean to be. It’s kind of hard to sort my thoughts out though, like my life just flashed before my eyes, and holy fuck, is it sad that this is one of the most exciting things to happen to me?”

“Almost dying is exciting?”

“Exciting doesn’t have to be a good thing,” Frank shrugs, “anyway, coffee. I’ll buy you a coffee, and try to stop thanking you.”

“I’m not actually that bothered by it,” Aaron says, “it’s kind of sweet.”

“Well I try,” Frank says, and he tries to remember where the hell he was going to go. Coffee. His brain must hate him right now.

Frank shakes his head to try to make the shock go away, and makes an obligatory idiot out of himself when he forget where the fuck he is. He literally works a block away and it’s like he’s never seen the street before.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

Frank nods, “yeah. I’m an idiot most of the time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided that if Frank is going to fall in love with someone who isn’t Gerard it should be an OC, and not a band member, because that would be weird. So yeah, is it okay so far?


	5. Frank's Smitten (Or, I Mean, Infatuated. Who the Fuck Says Smitten?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard and Patrick judge Frank for his stupidity.

Frank hasn’t really been around someone new in a long while. He doesn’t really like going out and meeting new people. He’s content where he is, with a few close friends, and a crush on his roommate.

Maybe he just has a certain soft spot for the guy who quite literally saved his life, or maybe it’s because Aaron is quite possibly the sweetest person he’s met in years, but he almost forgets about his dislike for meeting new people.

“So do you make it a habit of walking into traffic?” he asks.

“Well not usually. Or well, I may not be the most cautious guy in the world, but I’m pretty fuzzy in the head today. I caught some virus or something, so I’m just sleepy and not entirely here today,” Frank replies.

“You seem okay to me,” Aaron says.

“Well I’m _trying_ right now, I wasn’t really when I stepped in front of that car. I got sent home because my boss told me I was a danger to others and myself. Turns out he was right.”

“You’d have been better if you hadn’t been sent home,” Aaron says, and Frank follows behind him, because he seems to know where he’s going. He’s headed near the place where Frank works, but there’s a coffee shop a block past that so he just assumes that’s their destination. He doesn’t really care, he’s kind of lost in Aaron’s voice and face. Frank decides that Aaron looks like Derek from criminal minds, though he’s got brighter and more piercing eyes.

“Probably not actually,” Frank says, “because than I wouldn’t have met you so I’d have been run over by some other car. I’m not really a klutz, but irony is a bitch.” 

Frank’s nervous about the first part of that sentence, because he just admitted to being glad he met Aaron, and he’s awkward. Now he’s blushing and hoping that he looks like he’s cold, because he doesn’t want a virtual stranger to think he’s embarrassed.

“You have a lot of faith in yourself,” Aaron says sarcastically.

“I may be a cynic, but I have seen enough of the world to know that everything is played out through the mind of one who’s much more cynical than myself.”

“And quite the optimist,” he says.

“I’ll have you know, when you have a life where everything always comes up short, it’s quite difficult to be an optimist,” Frank says.

They turn a corner and he sees his diner and points to it, “See, I work there. Like, the worst job, because I always thought that when I was an adult I’d have a cool job. I thought I’d be a superhero or in a band, or doing something, but no, instead, I’m a minimum wage slave to capitalism.”

“Then how about I buy the coffee?” Aaron says, and Frank shakes his head.

“No, because it’s supposed to be my ‘shut up and stop saying thanks to the kind stranger’ gift to you, but if you buy it than it’s ‘hey look the kind stranger just so happens to be a saint, and I really need to reconsider my life decisions,’” Frank says.

“Well, but you made such a point to say that you’re unlucky in your occupation,” he says.

“I may be that, but I can afford a coffee,” Frank says, “as long as it’s not one of those fancy-shmancy ones with twelve different add-ins.”

“You just spoiled all the fun!” Aaron laughs.

“Did I? You are very picky, sir,” Frank replies, and he nearly makes a wrong turn. Honestly you’d think he’s never been here before, but he has taken this exact route for years.

“I’m not picky, you’re easy to tease,” he says.

“Damn, and I try so hard to be threatening, though I am tiny, so it really doesn’t come across. I just look like one of those TV character tropes where the little guy’s nickname is something that makes him seem like a giant wrestler. I’m talking too much, aren’t I? Though, really, if I were in a comedy or movie, they’d probably introduce me as Dr. Manhattan, and then I’d come onto the screen and I’d be a fucking Smurf. I really should learn to stop talking, sorry.”

Aaron laughs and looks at Frank. He’s really not that much taller than him in Frank’s eyes, because he’s fairly used to looking _up_ at people. It gets repetitive, and it’s kind of annoying to stand next to women in heels who dwarf him.

“So what do you do, Mr. expensive shoes?” Frank asks, and then realizes it’s probably not polite to make fun of the footwear of a guy he’s only just met. It’s too late now though.

“That’s a rather specific nickname,” Aaron says.

“Oh, don’t mind me, just call me Clumsy Smurf,” Frank replies.

“I prefer Frank,” he says, and Frank likes the way his own name sounds with that accent. “But anyway, I’m just, like, a person who works at a big company.”

“Yeah, probably the _owner_ of a big company,” Frank says and he wants to hit himself because he’s being ruder than he really wanted to be, “fucking hell, I’m really bitchy today, but I don’t mean to be. It’s just that, you’re whole outfit is probably more than a week’s salary for me.”

Aaron looks down as if he hadn’t realized what he was wearing was fancy, and he shrugs, “this is just what I wear. Sorry.”

“Nah, I’m not judging you,” Frank says, “The accent really completes the look though. You look like a rich CEO, and it’s a good look.”

Frank is really tempted to just go step in front of another car, because he doesn’t have a filter today. He essentially just flirted with a guy who’s probably worth millions. He doesn’t like to judge people in that way, but the guy could easily be loaded, and it wouldn’t surprise Frank. He’s just got this aura to him where he comes across as a button-down executive of a huge company, and either Frank’s really judging him, or he’s dead on.

“You’re pretty close,” he says, “though I hate to think of myself that way.”

“Hey, I’m not stereotyping, well I am, but I’m not saying you’re a bad dude. Any guy who saves my life is alright in my books, especially the well-dressed French guy.”

“Canadian guy.”

“Oh so he’s Canadian!” Frank says, and he almost doesn’t process that they step into the Starbucks. He’s only clued in when he smells coffee beans, and it’s quite nice. That smell might get tiring after a while, but Frank enjoys it.

“Why? Is that surprising?” Aaron asks.

“I guess not. Canada is just like a more polite version of France, right? I’m not good with Geography. I thought that Denmark was the capital of North Dakota for like twenty years.”

“Are you serious?” He asks through a laugh.

“Well I may have embellished the stupidity a little bit, but I didn’t do too well in Social Studies when I was younger. Nor math. English wasn’t my strong point either. I was really good at lunch, and a boss at getting detention.”

“You’re actually quite amusing, Frank,” He says.

“Really? You glad you saved me?” Frank asks, grinning widely. He was pretty sure he was coming off as a dick, and he’s glad that he didn’t do that bad.

Frank’s mind muddles together again, as he tries to figure out how money works, but luckily he doesn’t do too badly. It takes him a minute longer than it probably should, but he buys himself and Aaron a coffee. He doesn’t really feel like he’s paid the guy back yet, because Aaron did save his life.

“God, I feel like this is such a tiny thing, because you gave me my fucking life, and all I give you is some liquefied seeds,” Frank says.

“Well at least you know where coffee comes from, so you can’t have done that horribly in school,” he says.

“You should see my ninth grade report card,” Frank jokes, “one of my teachers wrote that I was going to end up a stripper. I guess I’ve got the hips for it, but I didn’t know a teacher could even say that!”

Frank honestly doesn’t want to have to say goodbye to Aaron, because, he’s literally the sweetest human in all of humanity other than Gerard. He checks his watch though and apologizes to Frank that he really has to be heading out. Frank frowns, and tries to hold himself back from saying thank you a few dozen more times, but it’s hard and he says it again.

Maybe Frank’s just caught up on the fact that Aaron saved his life, but he really likes the guy. He doesn’t understand why, but he does, and he’s tempted to ask him for his number, but he decides that it would be weird. What are the chances that the sexy, dapper, polite, wealthy businessman is into dudes? Fate isn’t that kind.

Frank walks back to the apartment, much more carefully than he would have otherwise, and he can’t stop smiling. It’s actually kind of ridiculous, because it looks like someone sewed his mouth open, and he’s trying not to look like a complete idiot.

He enters his apartment and finds Gerard and Patrick watching an infomercial.

“Why the fuck are you two learning about the wonders of anti-aging cream?” Frank asks. He checks the time on his phone and sees that it’s nearly three.

“Gerard lost the remote,” Patrick says without turning.

“There’s buttons on the TV, you know,” Frank says.

“Are you suggesting that we stand up, walk across the room, and then _manually_ press the buttons?” Gerard asks exasperatedly, “What year do you think this is? 1782?”

“Yeah, because TV’s existed during the revolutionary war.”

Gerard turns to give Frank a look, but then sees him smiling, and his eyebrows furrow together.

“What are you so happy about?” He asks, and Patrick turns to look at him too.

“What? Oh, nothing. I almost got hit by a car today,” Frank says, pulling his jacket off.

Patrick and Gerard look at each other like they’re worried about Frank’s mental stability, and Patrick says, “yeah, because I’d be happy about that too.”

“Right!” Frank says, walking over to his room, and closing the door.

Gerard makes a face and yells to him through the door, “Are you going to explain to us what’s so good about nearly dying?”

Frank pops his head out of the door, and he’s still smiling, “I met a guy!”

He closes the door again, and the two men on the couch exchange another look, then Patrick says, “Are you going to explain to us how that has anything to do with your close call with being road kill?”

Frank’s head pops out again and he says, “Because this guy saved me from stepping out into the road, and he was really great.”

Patrick blinks in disbelief, because he’s fairly sure that he’s sitting right next to the guy that Frank’s in love with, but he’s gushing about someone else.

“Are you serious?” Gerard asks. Frank doesn’t respond immediately, and almost a minute passes. Frank leaves his room after a while with a different cleaner shirt, and then goes to sit on the armrest of the couch.

“Yes I am. And he was Fre- well he was Canadian, but he was French, and he was gorgeous.”

Patrick gives Frank this look, and inconspicuously mouths to him the word, ‘Gerard?’ Frank rolls his eyes, and shakes his head.

“Well anyway, I bought him coffee, and he’s really great.”

“Did you get his number?” Gerard asks, looking excited for Frank.

Frank’s face falls and he sighs, “No. I didn’t know if I should ask for it, but by the time he left, it was too late.”

Gerard groans, “Frank! How can you have met a guy and not even gotten his fucking number!”

“I’m sorry,” he replies defensively, “I can’t change it now, can I? Besides, he was way too good-looking to be gay anyway. He was just this nice guy on the street, that’s all.”

“But look at you, all smiley and happy about him!” Gerard says. “What’s his name?”

“Aaron.”

“Last name?”

“No idea,” Frank says.

“Fucking hell, Frank,” Gerard says.

“I’m sorry. Look, it was just a nice, pleasant, random experience, which I’m going to dwell on. I mean, it’s not that big a deal. It’s not like he was my soul mate or anything like that.”

“How do you know he wasn’t?” Gerard asks.

“Frank!” Patrick says, “Seriously?”

“It’s fine, I’m not as torn up as you two are,” Frank says.

“Yeah, but you should be,” Patrick says, “God, it’s like you’re not even trying.”

“Oh god, it’s not that big of a deal!”

“Okay Frank, this is you after _one_ meeting. You can’t stop smiling, and you have spent how much time with the guy? Like, thirty minutes or so? This is your reaction to half an hour. What if you spend more time with him?” Gerard says, “You’d probably create enough solar energy from the white of your teeth to power all of Africa!”

“He’s right,” Patrick says, and then silently he adds with his eyes, ‘plus you could get over Gerard.’ Frank shakes his head at the look in Patrick’s eyes, and he stands up.

“I don’t care about wrinkles, we should watch something else,” Frank says, as he walks over to the TV.

“You can change the subject all you want, Frank. You know you could have done more, and that’s fact,” Gerard says with a tisk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment?


	6. Frank Makes A Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Return of the Frenchman.

Tuesday morning and Frank’s sinuses have all but cleared up, though he’s still sneezing. He’s not as disoriented anymore though, so his job is infinitely easier than it had been yesterday.

He’s trying to wipe off the front counter, and also trying not to start humming, because he gets yelled at by his coworkers whenever he hums. It’s not like he tries to, but apparently he’s very loud and obnoxious, and also it’s hard to get the harmonies and guitar riffs with just one’s vocal chords.

He hears his name and looks behind him again to see who wants to complain about what he’s doing now, but no one behind him seems to have said anything.

“Frank!” the voice says again, and he’s fairly sure he recognizes that voice.

He looks around the place, and then up where directs his vision to the front door.

Frank’s heart stops for a moment, and he thinks that he must not have woken up this morning, because he’s bound to be dreaming. This realization saddens him because that means his last five hours of work weren’t real, and he’s not going to get paid for them.

Aaron is standing near the entrance to the diner, similarly dressed, but a little more lax today. He’s prettier than Frank remembered. Frank throws the rag he was using onto the counter and then pinches himself. He smiles when he realizes that he’s not dreaming.

Frank tries to step closer to the counter, and apparently multi-tasking is not his forte today.

“Oh god, Aaron,” Frank says before promptly tripping and falling to the floor. He ends up on the ground with his legs in front of him, accompanied by a rather large thump. He wishes the ground would just suck him up and let him die, so that he doesn’t have to face the embarrassment of the fact that he just totally made a fool of himself.

One of Frank’s coworkers, a waitress who’s been there longer than even he has, walks over to him, trying not to laugh. She offers him a hand, and Frank takes it shamefully. He tries to recover himself before he stands up, and looks at Aaron. He stands up facing the other way, brushes himself off, takes a deep breath, and then turns.

“I’m not going to lie to you, I’m dying a little bit inside,” Frank says. Aaron is looking at him in that ‘oh god I want to laugh, but it would be rude to laugh’ sort of way and Frank doesn’t even blame him. He’s such a complete ditz, and it’s because of Aaron that it happened.

“No please, go ahead. I know you want to laugh at me, get it out of your system,” Frank says. Franks standing near the counter, almost leaning against it. Aaron is a few feet back from the counter and he bites his lip.

“No sorry. That would be rude,” he says, but he’s grinning widely.

“I come off like a lunatic to you. I really don’t do this ever. I don’t almost die and fall over a bunch,” Frank tries to say.

“So I’m special?” he asks, and Frank’s blush grows. He looks down and grabs at his apron with shaking hands, trying to rub the sweat off of them. 

“At least you weren’t holding plates or something, you’d have broken them,” Aaron says.

Frank nods and clears his throat, “yeah. You’re, uh, totally right. That would’ve been so much messier.”

Aaron nods, “and we wouldn’t want to have you even redder than you are now would we?”

“Oh god, I probably look like a fucking tomato,” Frank says, “It’s not like I woke up this morning, and thought to myself that I should make an attempt to make an even bigger idiot of myself in front of the French guy who saved my life yesterday. Thanks for that by the way.”

“Oh no, are you going to do that again?”

Frank freezes, “shit, oh god. You’re right. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s alright,” he says smiling, “you don’t have to be so apologetic, it was a joke.”

“Yeah, sorry. No wait shit, I didn’t mean to apologize again, sorry. Motherfucker! I’m really not doing well with the whole talking thing today,” Frank says.

“No it’s endearing,” Aaron says.

“Really?” Frank asks, nervously rubbing at his own shoulder. 

He hadn’t realized until now just how obnoxiously he clashes with Aaron. He’s this trim, godly, rich French guy with strong arms that are hypnotizing Frank, compared to this short little punk kid with tattoos and greasy hair. It’s not like Frank necessarily sees himself as unappealing, but he’s certainly not a model like Aaron really should be. Frank would buy many an underwear catalog if this guy was on the front. He would also have a fruitful and extremely prosperous life as a porn star. Obviously he’s way too charming and important looking to be either, but Frank wouldn’t doubt his inevitable success were he to quit everything, and take up a new career.

“Yeah,” Aaron answers, “made enough an impression on me to come here.”

“Oh. Actually, why are you here? Not that I don’t appreciate it or anything, because trust me, I do, but I’m not that interesting.”

“You’re selling yourself short,” Aaron says.

“I am short.”

“You’re very sarcastic, I like that,” Aaron says.

Frank wants to reply with ‘I like your face,’ but instead settles for, “did you want something though?”

“Right! Sorry. About that, it’s just that, you mentioned, uh, you mentioned yesterday that you worked here, and I thought I’d like, stop by to say hello. I didn’t know if that was intrusive or-”

“No it’s fine, you’re fine. I mean, I don’t mean that you’re _fine_ , though you’re not like, not like, unfine, but I mean that you’re totally fine. Dammit. Not fine. Or yes fine, but fine in the sense that you’re okay, or that _we’re_ okay. Not we, but you know what I mean, like you and I are totally cool. Cool as in simpatico. It’s okay, like it’s not intrusive,” Frank rambles, and then decides he would very much like to go back to the kitchen and stick his head in the oven.

Aaron looks pretty lost at that, but just shakes his head and says, “Right.”

“Yeah so, uh, why you, I mean why are you here?” Frank asks, slanting up against the counter and leaning his head on his hand.

Aaron makes an odd gesture where he grabs his right arm near the elbow, and then holds onto it. Frank shuffles his feet under the counter and tries not to stare directly at Aaron.

“I was just wondering, and I guess just really hoping that I’m not misreading things here, because I’d hate to make a total buffoon of myself, but sorry, I’m rambling. I don’t mean to. Yesterday, I was totally scared shitless that I was wrong about you, but I thought on it overnight, and I guess it’s worth the chance, so here I am. I just wanted to, like, ask you maybe if I could like, get your number?” Aaron says, and to Frank, it’s like the sky started singing.

“What?” he asks, totally shell-shocked.

“Oh god, I did misread this, didn’t I?”

“Whoa, no wait. Fuck,” Frank says, flustered and confused, “no yeah, definitely.”

“What?”

Frank nods, and grabs the notepad from his apron, hurriedly. His hands are trembling and he has difficulty actually writing anything, but he scrawls the right digits down onto the top page of the pad.

“You didn’t misread anything, I’m just really dumb,” Frank says, “h-hold on.”

“You serious?” Aaron asks smiling.

“Um, only if you are. If you were kidding than I’m totally just playing around,” Frank says nervously.

Aaron makes a relieved laughing sound, “no, completely serious, sorry. I was so sure I was wrong, but I’m glad I wasn’t.”

Frank smiles back stupidly and tears off the top page than hands it over the counter to Aaron who accepts it gratefully.

“So, like, would it be out of line to ask if you want to maybe grab dinner later? Or, you know, if you’re busy tonight that’s fine and all.”

“No! Not busy. Unless you count old reruns of Batman with my roommate and neighbors, as busy, then I’m totally free,” Frank says.

“Okay cool,” he nods, “That’s good. I’ll um, so I can call you later then?”

“Well I think that’s kind of the purpose of me having given you my number, so I guess it’d be alright if you called me,” Frank replies.

Aaron looks down at the paper in his hand like he’d forgotten about it. Frank can’t help but look at the way the corners of his mouth are twitching upwards.

“And that’s Frank...?” he asks asking for a last name.

“Iero. Spelled with far too many vowels, as well as unpronounceable too any and all high school teachers,” he says.

“Aaron Crépeau,” he says in response, and Frank is in love with the way that the guy says his own name. He’s had years to practice it, so obviously he’s gotten pretty good at it, but damn does that roll of the tongue.

Aaron bites his lip again and he looks at Frank in a way that makes him want to melt, but he just smiles back. Frank hopes that his boss doesn’t come out here to tell him to get back to work, and to stop flirting with the customers.

“Well, I’ll see you later,” Aaron says backing up to the door, and Frank nods. “You know, I’m really glad I saved your life, Frank Iero.”

Frank is one hundred percent sure that he’s never heard his own name pronounced so beautifully. Aaron’s voice could lull Frank to sleep, it’s fucking majestic.

“Me too,” Frank says giddily and then his elbow gives out underneath his forehead, and he very nearly whacks his head on the counter, but he stops himself just in time. Aaron doesn’t seem to notice, and he gives Frank one last look before he exits the diner.

The minute he leaves, Frank lets out a very airy and giddy laugh. His coworker, the one who had helped him up, stands against the counter next to him. She’s an older woman, greying hair with wrinkles, and she’s got a name that shows it. No one names their kids Ruth nowadays.

“You are in love with that guy,” she says with amusement. 

“Did you _see_ him?” Frank says, “My god-fearing Catholic mother would want a slice of that.”

“He certainly owns a room,” she replies, “but what happened to the roommate?”

“What? Oh Gerard. He’s pretty, and blind as usual,” Frank responds, “why?”

“Because you seemed pretty hung up on that guy the last time I checked,” she says.

Frank shrugs, “Well, I mean, it’s not like I’m in love with Aaron or anything. Not actually. I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving Gerard, but this guy, he saved my life. I don’t know if you’ve ever had your life saved by a beautiful stranger, but it leaves quite the impression.”

“You’re practically swooning over that guy, someone you just met, and you’ve been stuck on a different guy for five years. It’s a fairly noticeable, and rather off-character reaction.”

Frank considers her for a moment, “Hm, maybe you’re right. But did you see him! I bet even his snot is pretty. That face could make a lesbian turn, or a straight guy. Just fuck.”

“It’s a powerful face if it’s got you all giggly.”

Frank smiles, “I don’t know. I guess I just can’t, I mean, I owe him my life, and the fact that he saved me, that’s hot. Like that’s fucking hot. I’m super into it, and that ass of his could start a war.”

“I’m too old to hear this,” she says, and turns.

“Oh sure, but you are so envious that I have a chance with that boy,” Frank says.

She rolls her eyes, and goes back to doing her actual job. Frank is reminded of the fact that he has a job and he’s at it, so he should really get back to doing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PETE. WENTZ. IS. BLOND.
> 
> I rePete (look at my pun): peTE IS BLOND.


	7. Frank Reconsiders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second thoughts and hopeless yearning.

“I have news of epic proportions,” Frank says as he enters the apartment.

“Frank has news of epic proportions,” Pete repeats into the seemingly empty apartment in front of him. Frank eyes him for a moment, but rolls his eyes and decides to roll with it.

Gerard’s head pops out of his room and he says, “I heard that there is news of epic proportions.”

“There is indeed,” Frank says, throwing his jacket off.

“Well go on, tell us. It had better be epic or you totally oversold it,” Pete replies.

“I have a date,” Frank says proudly, as he saunters across the room and takes a seat next to Pete.

“You have a what?” Pete asks.

“A date!”

“A small fruit that looks like a nut?”

“No a date. Like a date with an actual person,” Frank clarifies.

“I’ve eaten a date before, there is not enough to share with another person,” Pete says, eyeing Frank like he’s gone insane.

“You actually have a date?” Gerard asks looking about as lost as Pete, but there’s a touch of something like awe in his face.

“I do! Unbelievable, right?” Frank says.

“But what happened to the guy you met yesterday?” Gerard asks.

“There was a guy who you met yesterday?” Pete interrupts looking so bewildered, it’s almost amusing, “why the fuck was I not informed of this?”

“Well you didn’t ask,” Frank shrugs, “and it’s with the guy who I met yesterday.”

“Who _is_ the guy you met yesterday?” Pete yells, before Gerard can ask any further questions.

“Long story short, I almost got hit by a car and met this guy,” Frank says.

“Oh yeah, ‘cause that really clears everything up,” Pete says.

“But you didn’t get his number! You chickened out and didn’t ask,” Gerard says, looking at Frank curiously.

“Well yeah, but he came in to work to see me today, and oh fuck, is he good looking. I can’t even describe to you what he looks like,” Frank says, sighing, “and I told him where I worked yesterday, and he came in to see me, and I gave him my number, and he called me, and he has such a nice voice, I wish you could hear it, his voice is like fucking heaven, and-”

“Frank! Remember to breathe,” Pete reminds him.

“What? Oh sorry. I guess I got carried away there. Anyway, he called me a little while ago, and I have a date tonight!”

“What? But we were going to marathon the raunchy 60’s Batman show tonight!” Gerard says.

“It’ll still be there when I get back. Adam West isn’t going anywhere when you have the giant collector’s box set.”

“Yeah but-”

“Gerard, you’ll live,” Frank says.

“Fine, so when are you going to meet him? Where are you going to meet him? What was his name again?” Gerard asks, spit firing questions to make Frank feel like he’s on a game show of some sort. Not a very good game show though.

“His name is Aaron, and he’s going to pick me up, because he apparently has a car, which is news to me,” Frank says, and watches as Gerard walks over to the kitchen.

“He has a car? Is he rich or something?” Pete asks.

“Kind of,” Frank shrugs, “I mean, he’s not not-rich.”

“What does that mean?” Pete questions.

“Well I’m not poor, and you’re not poor, but Aaron has a lot of money, but I wouldn’t say he’s rich. He’s lower higher class, or higher middle class.”

“I think my brain just stopped working and crawled out of my ears,” Pete says. “First you tell me you have a date, and now he’s loaded?”

“Not per se, but think what you will,” Frank responds. Pete gives him this disbelieving look, and then his eyes point in the direction of Gerard. Frank shakes his head to warn him to shut up, and then he realizes that Pete didn’t really say anything. He’s insinuating the same question everyone else seems to be having.

‘ _What about Gerard?_ ’ Pete mouths.

“Fuck off,” Frank replies vocally.

“What?” Gerard questions.

“Frank hates me,” Pete says.

“Well yeah, but so does everyone else. I don’t really know what you’re expecting, Pete,” Gerard says.

“I feel unappreciated,” Pete frowns.

“It’s not unappreciative if it’s warranted,” Frank says, “now let me go change, because I have a date with a really hot guy.”

“How hot is he?”

“Really,” Frank says, standing up and walking over to his room. Gerard watches him quizzically, and sees a sort of swagger in Frank’s step that hadn’t been there a few days ago. Part of him doesn’t believe the new person before him, but at the same time he’s finding it hard to recognize why it’s so surprising. 

“He seems different,” Gerard says when the door closes behind Frank.

“Good different, or bad different?”

“I don’t know yet,” Gerard says, “I mean, I’m glad that he finally fucking found someone who he’s excited about, but it does seem rather fast for him to be falling.”

“He’s quick with feelings, everyone knows that,” Pete shrugs. He turns to look at Gerard, and he just wishes how much he could enunciate to Gerard how weird it actually is. Frank’s supposed to be head over heels in love with Gerard, not someone else.

“I just don’t know how I feel about it being this _quick_.”

“Be happy for him,” Pete says.

“I am. I just hope he looks before he leaps,” Gerard replies.

“Frank’s a smart guy. Even if he doesn’t always show it, and in fact, goes out of his way to make you think the contrary, he is still smart. He’s not an idiot,” Pete says.

“Well he’s a bit of an idiot when it comes to things like this, don’t you think?” Gerard asks, “Have you ever seen him like anyone throughout our time knowing him?”

Pete rolls his eyes when he looks away from Gerard, “no, not at all. Never seen him love anyone.”

“Me neither,” Gerard says, and Pete has to stop himself from snorting out loud. Gerard is so clueless it’s laughable.

“Hey, is a tie too much?” Frank asks stepping out of his room.

“Yes,” Pete nods, “you look like a carny.”

“Carnies don’t wear ties,” Frank replies.

“Well it’s mostly your face that screams ‘carny’ to me,” Pete shrugs.

“I think you look fine, but it’s a first date, Frank. You don’t need to look like you’re attending a wedding,” Gerard tells him.

“So no tie?”

“You are really on edge today,” Pete rolls his eyes. “No. No tie. You’d look like you’re trying too hard, and even though you _are_ trying too hard, it’s better if you don’t look it.”

“Am I really? Am I hopeless?”

“You’re so unbelievably hopeless that it’s not even funny,” Pete says.

“Don’t say that,” Gerard scolds, “you’re not hopeless, Frank.”

“He’s a little hopeless,” Pete says.

“He’s not that hopeless!” 

“I’m a little hopeless,” Frank concedes.

“Shut up, the both of you,” Gerard says, and Frank evaluates himself before deciding that he’s fine, and he really doesn’t need a tie. He also realizes that his hands are shaking, and that he looks far too uptight considering it really is just a date. He hasn’t had one that he was actually excited about since he met Gerard.

Frank looks at Gerard from where he’s standing in the doorway, and his heart falls for a minute. He realizes how foolish he’s acting, because looking at Gerard makes him remember how much he loves the guy.

He does with every fiber of his being. He loves Gerard so much that it makes his stomach twist in knots when it dawns on him that he’s caught up on someone else. It makes the feeling he has for Aaron feel fake, because he doesn’t have any room left for anyone who isn’t Gerard. Fuck, does he love Gerard. Every day he wakes up and realizes that the pain of going unnoticed is still there, and growing ever stronger, because Gerard will never love him back. He never has, and never will, and accepting that for Frank will be life destroying. He would rather have happiness with Gerard than with anyone else, but that’s not an option now and it never will be.

Frank hates that he knows that much. Gerard will never want him in return, because he doesn’t care about Frank that way. He hates it, but it’s true. He hates knowing that someday he’s going to have to move on, because he can’t be hooked forever. Eventually he’s going to have to let go and get on with his life. His life is about Gerard though. That’s all he really wants, so who is he really if he doesn’t have this immobilizing crush on Gerard. Frank doubts that it’s ever going to go away though, because really, how could it? He can try to shroud it, but it’ll always be there.

Sooner or later though, Frank has to live his own life, and Aaron might not be the one, but if Frank waits forever to find someone to cover up his feelings for Gerard, than he’ll never regain himself. He’s got the glimmer of a chance though, right now. He’s got a high heart rate jumping in his chest at the idea of someone else. Someone who isn’t Gerard. That’s the first time he’s felt his heart beat out a new rhythm in five years. He’d be a fool not to see where this goes.

Getting over Gerard is not something Frank is capable of doing completely, and he’s certainly not capable of doing it by himself, but maybe if he tries to pretend it’s not there, it’ll stop hurting. It’s never really going to go away, the love of Gerard, but maybe if he tries, it’ll get less.

“Is it bad that I’m scared?” Frank asks.

“Of what?” Pete asks, and makes the smallest gesture towards Gerard.

“You know,” Frank replies with a nod.

“Do you think you’re ready for this?” Pete asks him.

“Absolutely not,” Frank says.

“Then I think you can do it,” Pete tells him.

“I’m lost. What are we talking about?” Gerard interjects.

“It’s not important,” Frank disregards and sighs. “I don’t know if this is really such a good idea.”

“Frank!” Gerard complains, “come on, it’s taken you so long to find anyone to be excited about, you are not going to throw this away now. I won’t let you.”

“But what if I tell you I can’t do this,” Frank pleads with his eyes staring directly into Gerard’s.

His face softens as he says, “I mean, if you really don’t think you can, I’m not going to push you. I just want you to realize what decision you’re making.”

Frank frowns, and goes over his thoughts. His second thoughts are plaguing him vehemently, but at the same time he’s being burned alive by the sensation of guilt for wanting Gerard. He has to just get over it, and he’s never going to be able to if he doesn’t at least start somewhere.

“Yeah, okay. I can do this,” Frank nods. The both of them look happy, Gerard more so, with Pete having a mixture of worry on his face, but Frank pretends he doesn’t notice.

“I really hope this works out for you,” Gerard says.

The buzzer to the apartment goes off a second later, and Frank’s heart stops for a second as he realizes that this is actually going to happen. He’s actually going to go out on a date with Aaron and he can’t do much to stop that now.

“Perfect timing,” Gerard says with a smile, and turns to buzz Aaron in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for not updating, but I had a really shitty time at the DMV, and I didn't have the energy to write anything.


	8. Gerard Likes Batman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrick convinces Frank that he's being a twat.

Frank’s palms are sweating quickly, and he’s trying to furiously wipe them off on his pants, but to no avail. Pete is looking at him like he’s some sort of entertainment, and he’s trying not to laugh.

“What are you staring at?” Frank asks Pete accusatorily.

“What crawled up your ass?”

“Go fuck yourself,” Frank replies, “I’m nervous, don’t laugh at me. It’s been five years since I went on a proper date, Pete. Five and a half actually.”

“Oh that’s so sad,” Pete answers.

“Shut up. I haven’t kissed anyone in five years, Pete. Oh fuck, what if I have to kiss him, and I’m awful. What if I’m no good? I have no practice. Oh god, this is not a good idea, I should not have agreed to this.”

“Calm yourself. If you don’t want to kiss him, don’t kiss him, and if he tries to kiss you when you don’t want to kiss him back then punch him in the fucking face.”

“He has such a pretty face,” Frank says wistfully.

“Then kick him in the crotch, I don’t care. You’ll do fine, Frank. Just act like yourself, and try not to bring up the fact that you’re in love with-”

“Shut up!” Frank interrupts him warningly with a hiss, before Gerard hears. Gerard is too busy doing something in the kitchen to notice them talking though, and Frank bounces in his place. He’s unable to keep still at the best of times, but right now the nervous energy is pulsing through him like electricity. The feeling is making him worry that he’ll electrocute himself if he isn’t careful.

“Gerard, tell Frank he’s being an idiot, and that he’ll do fine,” Pete calls.

“Frank, you’re being an idiot, and you’ll do fine. Good?” Gerard says.

“Ugh, fine. Should I do something with my hair?” Frank asks. Pete rolls his eyes so widely that Frank’s worried he might need to be exorcised for a second. 

“You’re a catch, Frank,” Gerard tells him, “just be yourself.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that? Who else am I going to be? Did you expect me to go out on a date and act like John Cleese?”

The front door opens then, and Frank expects to see Gerard opening it up for Aaron, but it’s just Patrick.

“Someone told me that Frank has a date, and there was no way in hell that I was going to miss this,” Patrick says, smiling widely.

“How on earth did you know that?” Frank asks, as Patrick walks over and leans over the back of the couch to grin at him mockingly with Pete.

“I have a phone you know,” Patrick says like it’s obvious.

“And I have thumbs,” Pete says, “I texted him. Told him that he didn’t want to miss the show.”

“Oh god, you guys had better not ambush him. I want him to think I’m normal, or at least I don’t want him to know that my friends are insane on my first date! Seriously, just act normal, okay. If you embarrass me, I will have your head on a pike.”

“Well that’s nice. Jeez, Frank. We weren’t going to show him your baby photos,” Pete says.

“No of course not. You can only do that on the third date or after,” Patrick chimes in.

“Oh god, we don’t even know if I’ll get to a third date. Try not to embarrass me please. I will never forgive you,” Frank says.

“Don’t worry, Frankie. I won’t let them humiliate you. I can’t say anything about yourself though, Frank. You do have a tendency to be really awkward.”

There’s a knock at the door and Frank really freezes up now. Gerard glances over at him, and tries not to laugh at how mortified his friend looks. He turns to get the door, and while Gerard’s back is turned, Frank runs back into his room.

“I’ll get him,” Patrick sighs, walking around the couch.

Gerard goes over to the doorknob, and gives Pete a look before he pulls the door open. Patrick has gone into Frank’s room and is trying to pry him away from the bed post. He’s stuck his head into his pillow, with a death grip on the headboard, while Patrick just stares at him, and starts pulling on his feet.

“Patrick, I’m fine here thank you. If you’d stop treating me like a child, I’d very much like to die on this pillow.”

“You’re such a pansy, get up,” Patrick tells him.

“Frank, you’re date is here!” Gerard calls from the living room. Frank hadn’t noticed that Patrick closed the door but he knows that now, because of the way that the voice is muffled.

“Give me a minute!” Patrick yells back, “Frank lost his, uh... phone.”

“No!” Frank shouts.

“Yeah, his phone has got to be somewhere in here,” Patrick says again. It’s best not to let his date know that he’s trying to avoid going on the date.

Pete, still sitting on the couch, and gawking at the man who just stepped into the apartment, tries to stop himself from laughing. He notices Frank’s phone on the coffee table, and grabs it so that the guy doesn’t realize that they’re lying to him.

“So what’s your name again?” Gerard asks. He opens the door, and stands back for him to walk in.

“Aaron,” he says, looking timidly from Gerard to Pete. Pete’s got this weird grin on his face that he’s trying to hide.

“I’m Gerard. Frank’s roommate. That’s Pete,” Gerard points to Pete who waves at him halfheartedly, “Pete lives next door and eats all our food.”

“I don’t eat all your food,” Pete says, “I leave the gross stuff alone.”

“Fine,” Gerard shakes his head then corrects, “That’s Pete. He eats most of our food.”

Pete nods and makes a face that says voicelessly ‘ _pretty much._ ’

“Can I invite you in, Frank’s not quite ready yet,” Gerard asks, and Aaron still looks nervous as hell, but he steps forward slightly. Aaron doesn’t want to be seen as stiff, but he’s rather uncomfortable, because he’s in a near-strangers apartment with two complete strangers looking at him.

“Patrick!” Pete calls at the closed door.

“Yeah, Frank can’t function properly without his phone,” Patrick says. Frank’s still protesting to leave his bed, and Patrick has decided to stop tugging on him. Instead, he sits on the duvet next to him and tries to talk him into getting up.

“I can come back later,” Aaron says.

“Oh he’s French!” Pete says excitedly.

“Close enough,” Aaron shrugs.

“How come no one told me he was French?” Pete asks, “Really I feel like you guys never include me on anything.”

“That’s because no one likes you, Pete,” Gerard says.

“Patrick likes me,” Pete frowns.

“That’s because Patrick has an obligation to like you. He lives with you and sleeps with you and all that shit,” Gerard says.

“Everyone likes Patrick better than me,” Pete complains.

“Shut up, Pete!” Patrick calls from Frank’s room.

“Yeah, shut up, Pete,” Gerard agrees.

Aaron is trying to figure out whether they’ve forgotten about him or whether they just talk like this under any circumstances, and it doesn’t matter who listens in.

Patrick is getting somewhere with Frank at least, because he’s no longer clinging to the bedframe, but his head is still buried in a pillow.

“Frank, I know you’re in love with Gerard, but we both know that he doesn’t reciprocate that. You’ve got to accept that, you really do,” Patrick says.

Frank’s muffled response is unintelligible, but Patrick assumes it’s some sort of counterargument. Patrick just huffs and puts his hand on Frank’s shoulder.

“You’re going to have to get up, or you’re going to have to go face your date. Think of him standing right out there, waiting for you. He wants to see you, Frank. He wants to go have a good time with you, but here you are trying to pretend he doesn’t exist. Who are you helping? If you’re not going to go out with him, it’s your responsibility to go out there and _tell_ him that. Face him and tell him that you’ve changed your mind, or face him and tell him you’re ready.”

Frank makes a whimpering noise and turns his head to look at Patrick.

“But it’s like I’m betraying Gerard.”

“He’s just your roommate, Frank. He’s nothing more than that. You may look at him like he’s the sun, but to him, you’re just Frank. I hate to say it to you, but that’s the truth. You’re going to have to accept it, and sooner is really so much better than later. You have been in love with a guy who isn’t going to love you back for so many years. Here you have the option to be with someone who can love you back, and you’re running away from him. So you really want to risk the chance that you’re only haven is going to walk out of your life? This is your time to try to get over it,” Patrick says, “to get over Gerard.”

“I don’t want to get over him,” Frank mumbles.

“I know you don’t. You want to get under him, but it’s not going to happen,” Patrick says.

Frank sighs, “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yeah fine,” Frank says, and he pulls himself up carefully. 

“Wait seriously?” Patrick asks.

“Yes, I’m serious,” Frank says, and he gets up into a sitting position, “I can do this. Don’t look at me like that.”

“What? Sorry. I just didn’t think that would work. The whole inspirational speech thing, that only ever works in the movies. I should be a life coach or something!”

“No you really shouldn’t,” Frank says. He pulls himself into a sitting position before he stands up drowsily.

“So you’re really going to do this?” Patrick asks.

“Yeah, I’m going to go out there and have a good time with him. Do I look fine? Do I look scared or terrified?”

Patrick evaluates him, “kind of on edge, but it’s not that noticeable. Go on then, Frank. Knock him dead.”

“Yeah, okay,” Frank says. He looks way more petrified than Patrick lets on, but hopefully he’ll ease up.

Gerard turns quickly when Frank’s door opens, and he sighs a little in relief.

“Did you find your phone?” Gerard asks.

“My phone?” Frank questions and then Pete discreetly holds it up to show him. “Oh, um, yeah. I found my phone. It was hiding!”

“Hi Frank,” Aaron says, looking at him in a way that Frank doesn’t understand. He looks way too excited to see him, and Frank doesn’t know why anyone would ever look at him like that. It’s a less extreme version of the way he looks at Gerard.

“Hi,” Frank replies.

“Hello!” Pete pitches in, because he likes annoying people, and also likes being included in things which he seldom is.

“Go away, Pete,” Patrick says, stepping around Frank to sit on the couch beside him.

“I told you no one likes me,” Pete says, raising his arms in exasperation.

“You ready to go?” Aaron asks.

“Yeah,” Frank says excitedly and walks past the couch, grabbing his phone from Pete as he does.

Gerard tries to keep the two of them there as long as he can, so that he can get to know the guy going out with his best friend a little more, but Frank practically drags Aaron out of there. He seems anxious to get away from the three of them, which confuses Gerard because only a moment ago he’d been terrified of leaving at all.

Frank has a problem with seeing Aaron and Gerard in the same room though. It feels wrong to him.

The minute the door closes behind Frank and Aaron, Patrick says, “That was one good looking dude.”

“That _was_ a good looking dude.”

“I wanted to watch Batman,” Gerard mopes, completely ignoring them.

“You can still watch Batman. It’s not like you have a requirement to watch it with Frank,” Patrick says.

“I can’t watch it without him though! He wouldn’t be mad, but we have an unspoken thing,” Gerard says.

“Unspoken thing? He doesn’t control you, why on earth do you care so much?” Pete asks, looking over at Gerard enquiringly.

“He’s my best friend,” Gerard shrugs.

“Well thanks, I feel loved,” Pete answers.

“You know what I mean. Besides, I live with him, don’t I? Obviously I’m closer to him than to you two,” Gerard replies.

“Sounds like you’re jealous to me.”

“Jealous? Of what? What is there to be jealous of? It’s not like I own him or anything, he’s just my roommate and friend,” Gerard says, “I’m happy that he has a date, but I wanted to watch Batman, and I’m just bitter about that.”

“You care way too much about Batman,” Patrick rolls his eyes.

“Well excuse me, but are you cooler than Batman? Do you know anyone who is? No, I don’t think so,” Gerard says, “Batman is a bamf.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have my first day of school tomorrow. I'm in college and I do online school, but I can't say that I'm going to always be good at updating, so I thought I'd let you know.


	9. Frank's Date Was Perfect (Or Was It?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gerard doesn't know why he doesn't like Aaron.

“I don’t know how to make myself out to be anything but hopeless, but I really have no idea how to start conversations with people,” Frank says.

“That’s alright,” Aaron replies, “I’m not that great either.”

“Yeah, but you’ve got such a nice voice, that people probably just get lost in that,” Frank says, and then blushes. “I’m sorry. I’m not used to going out on dates or anything.”

“Really?” He asks, looking actually surprised, “you’re, I mean, I guess you’re attractive enough to get a lot of dates.”

Frank blushes again, “you too.”

He tries not to make eye contact and Frank’s face turns even redder, “so why then? Why so few dates? I mean, if you want to tell me.”

“Well, I guess, I don’t know. I’m so dull. My whole life is just a really depressing series of lusting after someone I can’t have,” Frank says.

“Straight guy?” He asks, “I think we’ve all been there if that’s the case.”

“No. Well... I don’t know. He’s just him. It’s just... have you ever fallen in love with someone you’re not supposed to? It’s really hard, but it’s worse when they don’t love you back. This guy, like, he doesn’t love me back. He doesn’t even give me a second glance. He never has, and I don’t know what’s worse. I don’t know if it’s worse to swoon over him knowing he doesn’t love me back, or swoon over him and hope that one day maybe he will. It’s hard either way.”

“I’ve never been in love with someone I’m not allowed to,” Aaron confesses, “I don’t normally fall in love with people so willy-nilly, so the development it would take to build up that connection would kind of null the process I’d think.”

“It doesn’t. If anything, it gets riper. I used to just be sort of silly in love, I could’ve gotten over it, but puppy love turned to real love so quick I didn’t get the chance to rethink falling. It just happened, and it’s been dealing with it ever since that has made life so miserable,” Frank replies.

“So who is it then? This guy?’

“Oh god, I don’t think we know each other _that_ well,” Frank says, blushing profusely. He wants to keep his crush on Gerard to himself, and the several dozen people who already know about it.

Aaron smiles, and shrugs like he doesn’t really care. Frank lets out a breath, because the last thing he wants is to be pressed about Gerard while he’s on a date with someone else, with the intent to get over him. He’s not sure that’ll be possible, but he’s enjoying himself right now.

He wouldn’t have picked this restaurant though. Their breadcrumbs probably cost more than a week’s worth of food that Frank buys. He’s not used to the lavish dining. To be honest, he’s never really even been to a restaurant with a table cloth.

He’d have been content ordering pizza and watching reruns of crappy seventies shows. That’s what he and Gerard do a lot more than they probably should. It’s cozy though. It’s comfortable not having to leave the house, with a box of pizza and your best friend. It doesn’t take any effort, and there’s no pressure on him.

One of the hardest things about being in love with Gerard is obviously the fact that he _is_ Frank’s best friend. There’s no one in the entire world he trusts more or likes being around than Gerard. Not necessarily in a love kind of way, Frank just enjoys his company. He likes talking to Gerard. He likes making Gerard laugh, and he likes the way that there’s never any pressure on him to be perfect or smart or fancy. He’s just Frank with Gerard.

This is nice too, Frank decides. It’s not really his cup of tea, but he’s enjoying himself. Still, it doesn’t really seem perfect. There’s definitely no sparks at the moment, but maybe he’s just getting sidetracked on the fact that this is not Gerard. This is Aaron. Maybe if Gerard brought him to a swanky, upscale restaurant he’d feel different about it. He wouldn’t necessarily like that though. With Gerard it’s familiar and inexpensive, and that’s enough to make it perfect.

“You’re frowning,” Aaron notes.

“Am I?” Frank asks, looking surprised. He looks up from where his eyes were trained, on the blindingly spotless silver wear in his place setting. It occurs to Frank that there’s two different forks, and they look nearly identical to him. He’s trying to figure out why on earth anyone would need two different forks. Maybe it’s for really hardcore walrus impressions. 

In high school there had been a unit in Home Ec., which Frank had essentially fallen asleep in, where they talked about proper place settings. He recalls there being something about a salad fork, but for the life of him, he doesn’t know which one that is, if it’s even there. The fact that there’s the need for two forks at all is what gets to him. Why can’t fancy people use the same fork? It baffles him, and he tries not to dwell on it.

“You are, and you’re also deeply concentrating on your plate.”

“I am,” Frank nods, “it’s very shiny. All my plates were bought at the dollar store. I don’t own anything this fancy.”

“No?” he asks, looking interested. Frank doesn’t know why plates are interesting, but he’ll go along with it.

“Well you saw my apartment. You think we’re connoisseurs of fine china?”

He grins, “I guess not. Mine aren’t glamorous, but you might think it is.”

Frank snorts, “I’ve never even seen an actual real one hundred dollar bill. I regard them as about as fictitious as I do unicorns and dragons. _Of course_ I’d think your plates are fancy. Our plates have been known to melt to each other in the dishwasher.”

“I don’t think that’s supposed to happen,” Aaron says.

“Our dishwasher is older than Larry King. We don’t know how to use it. My roommate, Gerard, he’s too lazy to actually wash dishes, and _I_ don’t want to do it, so we just hope for the best, and go for it,” Frank replies.

“I seem to be really learning the fundamental pieces of you,” Aaron says mock seriously, “A guy who’d rather melt a plate than stick it in the sink and scrub it.”

“Pretty much.”

~*~*~*~

There’s this sort of inexplicable dislike for Aaron that Gerard is starting to feel. He doesn’t know why the hell he feels the way he does, but there’s something really troubling him. It’s not that there was anything wrong with Aaron. He seemed pretty nice actually. 

Gerard just excuses it as being bitter over Batman. Batman is important. Frank flaked out on Batman! That’s just inexcusable. 

He’s staring blankly at the TV, trying to stop counting the minutes Frank’s been gone. He knows it’s only been a few hours, but it feels like it’s been years.

“Oh!” Patrick says suddenly, looking excited. He’s sitting on the perch by the window staring down at the street below with interest.

“What?” Pete asks.

“This big fancy car just pulled up, and, hold on,” Patrick holds out a finger, “yes! That’s Frank. Man his boyfriend has a _really_ nice car.”

“What kind of car is it?” Pete asks.

“I don't know much about classic cars,” Patrick replies, “but it’s nice, and aww, Frank’s boyfriend got the door for him.”

“He’s not Frank’s boyfriend,” Gerard says, though he doesn’t know what inclines him to do so. Gerard’s correcting something really inconsequential, but he’s not sure this Aaron guy is anything close to a boyfriend yet. He’s just got a strange feeling about the whole ordeal. It’s not a pleasant feeling. 

“Whatever,” Pete says, “what’s he doing now?’

“Um, he’s getting the front door for Frank, and they’re stepping into the building. I can’t see them anymore.”

“Damn,” Pete sighs.

“Who gets to look through the peephole?” Patrick asks.

“Certainly not you, you’re a foot and a half tall, you probably couldn’t reach it,” Pete replies.

“You’re not that much taller than me!” Patrick says defiantly. 

“Guys, quit arguing! It’s my apartment, I get to look through the peephole!” Gerard says.

They both frown, but Gerard looks at them warningly, and they decide not to question him. He bounds quickly over to the door to get there before anything happens outside.

“You’re going to tell us if something happens, right?” Pete asks, coming up behind Gerard and standing a foot behind him.

“Yeah, just hold on. They’re not even in the hall ye-” he pauses, “Oh no wait, here they come!”

“What’s going on?” Patrick asks excitedly.

“They’re just talking. Frank is smiling. That smile that people give when they’re thinking about twirling their hair around their finger,” Gerard relays, “and, oh wait.”

“What?” Pete practically screams.

“Oh god, they’re kissing!” Gerard squeals, and then turns away. He doesn’t want to see that. It bothers him. He decides it’s just the creepy nature of spying on Frank at all that makes him turn away. 

“No fucking way,” Pete says, and pushes past Gerard to look through the small little hole in the door. “Shit, they are!”

“What, really?” Patrick asks, far beyond disbelieving. Last he checked, the guy Frank was in love with is on the wrong side of the door.

“That ain’t no peck on the cheek,” Pete says, “that’s not a ‘hey I had a good time, take care’ kiss either.”

“I don’t think I really need details,” Gerard says, scrunching up his face.

“I do!” Patrick says breathily, he goes over to Pete and tries to push him out of the way. “Budge over, Pete!” 

“No, this is getting good,” Pete replies, laughing.

“Whoa!” Patrick says, getting a glimpse, “if Frank were a chick, that would be second base.”

“I don’t think there’s a distinction between bases when it’s two dudes,” Pete says. “I think it’s just first, second, and so on.” 

“Well whatever it is, it’s heated as heck,” Patrick states.

“You two are such perverts,” Gerard says, trying to pretend that they’re not talking about Frank. It weirds him out to think that they’re referring to _Frank_. 

“Shit!” Pete screams, “they’re done, he’s coming!”

Gerard is watching the two of them frantically try to act normal, while he leans against the back of the couch. Pete busies himself looking at a shelf in the kitchen, while Patrick jumps onto the couch. They look like they’re trying way too hard to act normal.

The door opens, and Gerard is the only one who doesn’t look like he just robbed a bank from the guilt on his face.

“Enjoy the show?” Frank asks, looking at Pete who seems to be thoroughly fascinated in a jar of basil.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Pete replies.

“Mhm, sure,” Frank sighs.

“So how was it?” Patrick asks, and Gerard turns, trying to cancel out Frank’s words. He doesn’t know why he doesn’t want to hear them, but he doesn’t.

“It was good,” Frank says, “not perfect, but I’m going to go out with him again.”

“Well duh, you tried to eat his face out there,” Pete says, finally closing the cupboard door.

“You weren’t watching at all,” Frank says sarcastically.

“Well, I may have peeked,” Pete shrugs, “but you two were sucking face, so obviously it went well enough.”

Frank shrugs, because the date _was_ kind of perfect, but shouldn’t he feel better if it was perfect? It really was. It was perfect, but it just wasn’t _right_. It was perfect, just not for Frank. Anyone else, any sane person, would say it was the best date ever, but Frank disagrees. Gerard wasn’t there.

“You guys are awful,” Frank shakes his head, “I’m going to bed.”

“Have fun dreaming about whatshisname!” Pete calls after him, and receives a middle finger in return before the door slams shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment?


	10. Gerard and Frank Are Both Confused

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An evaluation of standings.

Frank’s had consistently impure thoughts since he met Gerard. He actually remembers the first time it happened. 

He met Gerard through Pete, and he has hated Pete ever since it happened. Frank really could have done without the all-consuming crush on his roommate, thank you very much.

He was about to be evicted from his apartment, because he didn’t have enough money to pay for his rent. Pete was a friend he knew from his old job, working at a store that eventually went bankrupt and no longer exists anymore. Pete lived next door to a guy who needed a roommate, and he’d told Frank of the opening.

Then he met Gerard. It’s all pretty much downhill from there.

Frank even remembers the first thing he’d thought when he saw Gerard for the first time. He wasn’t nervous to be interviewed for the part of being a roommate, but that was only up until he saw who was going to interview him.

“You never told me the guy was drop-dead gorgeous,” Frank said.

“Is he? I never noticed,” Pete replied.

“You’re not being serious,” Frank said exasperatedly.

“No, I’m kidding. Obviously I noticed, but he’s not into that.”

“Guys?”

“Anyone. He really likes comic books. He might be interested if you were literally Batman, but you’re not, so forget about it,” Pete told him.

Frank didn’t listen. Of course he didn’t. How could he listen to that when his mind was too busy imagining Gerard naked.

He had hoped that maybe Gerard would pick a different roommate, because he’d said he had a few other applicants. He didn’t pick someone else though. Apparently he was really enticed by the fact that Frank had the same taste in music. Frank still curses himself for even mentioning anything.

He could’ve just said he didn’t want to live with Gerard though. He could have found an ad for someone else who needed a roommate, or waited for some other offer. He didn’t think things through though. Frank just figured that moving in with the attractive guy would be okay, and he’d get over the crush with a little time. How was he supposed to know that the hot guy was not only hot, but also a really fantastic human being? Why couldn’t Gerard have been a bitch? That would have made it so much easier to get over his crush. He wouldn’t be miserable today if Gerard had just been rude.

Of course, the world is never the way you want it to be though. It’s always going to screw you for the fun of it.

Unfortunately, Frank got sucked into Gerard’s gravitational pull, and he hasn’t been able to get out of it since. He tried to avoid the guy for a little while when he first moved into their now current apartment. Just because they were roommates didn’t mean they had to be inseparable, but Frank stuck to him like duct tape, and he has ever since.

He seems to have forgotten himself just being in love with his roommate, so most o him is afraid of what will happen on that inevitable day where he and Gerard go their separate ways. It has to happen someday. Gerard will get a new job in a new city, or he’ll decide he’s too old for a roommate. Maybe Gerard will get mad at him and kick him out. Maybe he’ll figure out about Frank’s crush, and he’ll be so disgusted that he’ll throw him to the curb. It has to happen someday. 

The danger is that he really has forgotten himself. He’s still there, somewhere. He’s still got that person he used to be deep down, but he hasn’t seen that person in several years. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever bring that person back to the light of day, because he’s too busy fawning over Gerard to think about himself.

Frank’s always been the kind of guy to put other people first. People tell you that’s a good thing, but usually they’re not thinking about the dangers that it can bring. If you’re always putting other people first than that means you come second. It’s not selfish to say that everyone should try to put themselves first, that’s just common sense. You should always try to make sure you’re happy, because it’s _you_ that you’re living for. You aren’t born to live a life for someone else, it’s your life for a reason, you control it. Some people don’t do a very good job, and some people are content in being selfless. Eventually though, something’s gotta give.

You have to give in to the fact that you only have one shot at life to get it right. Frank has been living his own life for Gerard for too many years, but he’s too comfortable in his own misery to branch out. He doesn’t know who he is without this crush on Gerard. He used to be the short guy who was funny, if a little neurotic. Now he’s the guy with a crush on Gerard Way. He’s not an independent variable, and that would be okay if Frank was a science experiment. He’s not though. He’s a person.

No person should ever be a dependent variable in their own life. Frank knows that his obsession with Gerard is a little unhealthy, but if Frank is characterized exclusively as dependent on another person, than who is he without that person?

If a male anglerfish is only alive when it’s with a female anglerfish, than what is it _without_ the female anglerfish? The worst thing about it though is the fact that Frank is codependent on a person who is not codependent on him.

All these thoughts are converging on Frank while he looks up at the ceiling in his bedroom. He can hear the sound of the television in the other room. He can hear Pete laughing, and he can hear his own blood pumping in his ears. It’s a miserable pulse that’s drawing in a headache. His whole surroundings feel like the calm before a storm.

A crush isn’t supposed to ruin a person’s life though. It’s supposed to make you kind of wistful, and maybe a bit scattered, but it’s not supposed to make you hurt. It’s not supposed to make it feel like someone’s pinching your heart. He’s had a stabbing pain in his stomach the past five years, and there’s nothing he can do to make that pain go away. Frank doesn’t want to rely on other people to make him happy, but he fell down that rabbit hole a long time ago. Gerard is the one person who never fails to make him laugh and smile, but he’s also the only person who hurts him the most.

Gerard doesn’t know what he’s feeling. When he tried setting Frank up with people, it didn’t feel this way. He’d been excited that his friend might find someone who likes him. He was excited about the idea that maybe someone would like Frank the way Gerard likes him. Frank’s his best friend, all he ever wants is for the guy to be happy.

Why is Aaron different though? Aaron shouldn’t be any different than the other guys. It’s the fact that Frank found Aaron on his own though. Frank didn’t even need his help. He found Aaron all by himself.

That’s what bothers him. Gerard didn’t even have any impact on Frank finding someone. Frank has found a guy who he’s only known for a few days, and already he likes the guy. Gerard didn’t do anything to help him find Aaron, and that bothers him. 

He doesn’t know why. He should just be happy that Frank’s happy, because that’s how you’re supposed to feel when something good happens to someone you like, but he isn’t. He’s not happy about it.

It baffles Gerard. Why does he care how Frank met Aaron? Would he like the guy any better if he’d been the one who introduced them? Probably not.

The thought dawns into Gerard’s mind that Frank might fall for Aaron. He might fall so hard for the guy. He might spend more time with him than he does Gerard, because he might be in love and if Frank’s in love with someone than Gerard will start to lose him. 

He’ll start to lose his best friend, and he’s afraid of losing him. He doesn’t want to lose Frank, not even if Frank is happy. He wants Frank to always be there, which is an irrational thought without warrant, but it’s the way he feels. He wants Frank to always be there, wherever Gerard happens to go, he wants Frank there. He can’t fathom his life without Frank. It’s like he’s the only light in a dark room.

He’s having trouble grasping the fact that Frank might move on from this part of his life though. He might fall in love with Aaron, and leave Gerard behind.

“Gerard, are you okay?” Pete asks, looking worried about the fact that Gerard’s been staring at his own knees for about half an hour.

“What?” he asks, because he hadn’t realized he was lost in reverie.

“Are you okay,” Pete asks again.

“Yeah, you’re looking kind of grim,” Patrick notes.

“I don’t know,” Gerard shrugs, “I was just thinking about Frank.”

Patrick and Pete share a moment of complete confusion. They’re trying to confirm with each other that it was indeed Frank who had the giant crush, not the other way around. The look in Gerard’s eyes is all too familiar though.

“W-what about him?” Patrick stutters.

“Just that I don’t know what comes next,” he says, looking up, but still not looking at anything in particular. His eyes are out of focus like he’s sleepwalking, and not actually aware of his own words or movements.

“Well I assume he’s going to wake up and go to work tomorrow?” Pete suggests.

“No that’s not what I meant. Frank’s been on a few dates since I’ve known him. He’s never been on a second date though. Not with the same person.”

“So?” Patrick asks.

“Well, maybe he likes this Aaron guy. What does that mean?”

“That he likes him? I think the answer is in the question.”

“But I don’t know what that’ll mean. It’s a new chapter, and I’m not done with the last one. Frank... I guess he just reads faster than I do,” Gerard states.

“You don’t even know what this is going to mean for him,” Patrick says, “maybe it’ll be a fling, and they’ll only ever have two dates.”

“But maybe it’ll be more than that.”

“Don’t worry about something that hasn’t happened yet.”

Gerard sighs and makes a moping face. Patrick and Pete try not to dwell on it, because his behavior is totally reversed all of a sudden. He’s acting like Frank, but he can’t _like_ Frank. Surely he would have said something by now if he liked Frank. 

Maybe Gerard and Frank are both having a fluke. Everyone is always saying that correlation does not imply causation. It could be a coincidence that Gerard is now all of a sudden worrying about losing Frank, at the same time that Frank might be getting over Gerard.

Then again, maybe it’s not a coincidence at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stump baby though.


	11. Gerard Is A Creeper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks Pete.

“I don’t like the name Aaron,” Gerard remarks. Frank looks at him oddly, because that’s an odd topic of conversation to have during breakfast.

“Why not?”

“I just don’t. I don’t like that name. I also don’t like the name Ethel. Or Olga,” Gerard says.

“Okay...?” Frank says, “and that’s important because?”

“Well I don’t know,” Gerard says. He’s been trying to figure out the source of his dislike for Aaron, and he thinks he’s onto something. He doesn’t like the name. That must be it.

“I like the name Aaron,” Frank says.

“Really? Aaron? Like Aaron Paul? Who cooks meth? Is that how your boyfriend got to be so rich?”

“That’s the weirdest fucking tangent you could have possibly made. So many Aaron’s you could’ve chosen from, and you go with the guy who played the meth maker? How about Aaron Tveit. The cute one in musical theater,” Frank says.

“I don’t know I just don’t like that name,” Gerard shrugs, “just my opinion.

“Okay,” Frank says, and he takes a sip of his coffee, trying to figure out what’s up with Gerard. “So how do you feel about Aaron though? Other than his name, do you like him?”

“I, um, I don’t really know him well enough to give a proper answer,” Gerard says, which is his way of saying ‘absolutely not. I fucking hate the guy with a fiery passion.’

“Okay,” Frank nods, “well I think you might like him if you get to know him a little bit better.”

Gerard struggles to hold back the ‘there’s absolutely no way in hell that’s true’ in his throat, but just ends up coughing. He coughs into his coffee mug slightly, and Frank looks at him inquiringly. 

“You okay?” Frank asks.

“What? Oh I just, choked on my coffee a little bit. No big deal.”

“Yeah,” Frank nods, looking at him skeptically. “So I have to go to work now. I’ll see you later, and hopefully you won’t be acting so weird.”

“Who’s acting weird?” Gerard asks.

“You are, Gerard. You’re acting weird.”

“Oh,” Gerard nods. “Sorry.”

“Yeah,” Frank says and he grabs his keys off the counter. He keeps looking over his shoulder at Gerard, and Gerard tries to compose himself to look perfectly innocent, though he doesn’t know what he’s covering up.

“Bye then,” Frank says, and he walks out of the apartment after one more glance at Gerard.

Gerard sighs and his head falls onto the counter helplessly. He doesn’t know why he’s feeling so weird about all of this, he just is.

Frank’s cold seemed to go away overnight, which is good news. Gerard can’t exactly help but wonder why it went away so quickly, but he ignores that puzzlement in favor of questioning who this Aaron guy actually is.

Gerard’s not exactly proud of himself for what he does next, but he’s curious. He doesn’t want Frank to be hurt, and he doesn’t know why he doesn’t trust Aaron.

Gerard checks out the peephole he’d looked through last night to make sure that the hall is empty, before he creeps back, and enters Frank’s room. He doesn’t go in here normally even when Frank is home, but this is even weirder. He wants to know more about this Aaron guy though, but he doesn’t know the last name.

Frank’s pretty tidy, unlike Gerard whose room looks like it got caught on the bad side of a hurricane. Nothing much is really out of place though, and Gerard tries to figure out where he’d put something pertaining to Aaron. He needs a surname if he’s going to creepily Google the guy on the internet though.

Gerard immediately decides to check the pants Frank was wearing last night, because maybe he has a receipt or a business card in there. 

Gerard has a moment where he realizes just how wrong this actually is. He’s invading Frank’s private life, and he really should leave this alone, but he can’t. He’s physically incapable of just letting this go, and seeing what happens. What if this Aaron guy is a serial killer, or a pervert, or a fraud or something? Gerard could really be _saving_ Frank. Or at least that’s what he’s telling himself. He knows he’s being nosy, but it’s too late.

“Damn,” Gerard hisses to himself, because he’s got nothing. Frank’s room is spotless, and there’s nothing with any indication of who Aaron actually is. Gerard huffs to himself, and checks his watch. He should really be heading to work right about now, but he can’t give up yet.

Gerard looks around the room again, tries to imagine how it was when he entered, and sighs again. When he decides that everything looks to be in the same place as when he entered, he leaves quickly and then exits his apartment.

He doesn’t know what he’s actually doing. Not really, but he’s desperate and just a tad bit helpless.

Gerard knocks on the door of the apartment next to his. This is completely abnormal behavior for him, but he can’t stop himself.

The door opens to a very disgruntled, and unhappy looking, Pete.

“The fuck do you want this early in the morning?”

“It’s a weekday,” Gerard tells him. 

“So? I don’t have to be awake for another,” he checks the clock behind him, “nine minutes. You’re cutting into my precious sleeping time.”

“By nine minutes.”

“Yes! A whole nine fucking minutes,” Pete says, and Gerard is starting to realize that Pete’s version of a long length of time, is very different from Gerard’s.

“I just wondered if you knew Frank’s boyfriends’ last name?”

“You woke me up, with, nine, no eight minutes now, worth of blissful sleeping time to ask me if I knew Aaron’s last name?”

Gerard processes his words and nods, “that’s right, yeah.”

“Why do you want to know so badly?” Pete asks.

“I want to see if he’s ever been arrested or if he’s a sex offender, or if he’s a thief, or if he has any dirt whatsoever on him,” Gerard tells him.

Pete evaluates Gerard’s words for a minute then groans, and opens the door further for him to come in. Pete’s apartment is smaller than Gerard’s, and also dumpier looking. They don’t spend as much time in their apartment as they do in Gerard’s though, so that’s mostly why it looks so dingy.

“I don’t know the guy’s name,” Pete says, stepping around Gerard to close the door after him, “but I’m pretty sure Patrick does.”

“Great so, we’ll ask Patrick.”

Pete yawns and stretches his arms before answering Gerard to say, “he left for work already, but I can call him.”

“Good, you should do that,” Gerard says.

“And why, may I ask, are we doing this so early in the morning? Or at all?” 

“Because I need to know now. What if Aaron actually is a murder and he kills Frank at work with a chainsaw?”

“Frank works at a diner,” Pete tells him, “so what, did Aaron kill everyone in the whole diner with the chainsaw before he offed Frank?”

“Or he wore a mask,” Gerard says.

“We’re talking about Aaron, Gerard. Not Jason Voorhees.”

“But they’re both from Canada!”

“No, actually they are not. You’re an idiot, Gerard. I don’t know where Friday the 13th takes place, but I can assure you, it is not in Canada,” Pete says, as he grabs his phone.

“Okay, but Justin Bieber is from Canada and we can all agree that that’s a travesty to the country,” Gerard says.

“What is even _with you_ today?”

“I don’t know,” Gerard confesses, “I just don’t know if I trust Aaron.”

“I see that,” Pete says, bringing his phone to his ear. Gerard can hear the small sonorous ring of the dial tone, and he digs his hands into his pockets. He’s nervous because he feels like a horrible person, but he also feels excited and way too overconfident that they’re going to find something. He wants the dirt though. He wants to find whatever dirty little secrets Aaron is hiding, and put them on display for Frank, so they end up not going out on a second date.

Does that make Gerard a horrible person? Kind of, but he convinces himself that he has honorable intentions.

“Patrick,” Pete says when the ringing stops and a click signifies that someone’s picked up.

Gerard can’t hear the other end of the conversation, because it’s too quiet, but he pretty much picks up on Pete’s half and fills in the holes.

A few minutes later, Pete hangs up and looks at Gerard.

“Okay, so Patrick wants me to tell you that he finds what you’re doing deeply disturbing, and if Frank catches on to this, than Patrick had no part of it. He did, however, give me a name to work with.”

“Yay!” Gerard says excitedly, and then realizes he looks way too excited.

“So you’re creepy, but now you’ve caught my interest,” Pete says, “I’ll help you out, but I have to leave for work in no more than an hour, got that?”

Gerard nods, and Pete grabs his laptop on the counter. He grumbles to himself all the while, saying that this is beyond wrong, and that Gerard is a major creeper, but that doesn’t stop him from putting Aaron’s name into the search engine.

“Well it’s a good thing that he doesn’t have an overly common name,” Pete says.

“Yeah, but how do we look for, like, arrest records?” Gerard asks.

“I don’t think we even can,” Pete says, “I don’t know. I’m not a technical person.”

“Well what’s the first link when you search his name?” 

Pete rolls his eyes, but moves his finger around the track pad, then clicks on something. Gerard tries to lean over the counter to get a look of the screen upside down, but Pete just pushes his head away.

“It’s a newspaper article,” Pete says.

“Aha!” Gerard says and then stops to think about it, and realizes that he has absolutely no idea why he just said that. “What’s it about? Did he, like, steal a bunch of money from someone, or get caught trying to commit fraud?”

Pete looks over the article, and the light from the computer screen makes his face glow. It embellishes the small bags under his eyes, and Gerard is bouncing on the balls of his feet, waiting for Pete to tell him what it reads.

“Actually no,” Pete states, “it says that he spent a year in Africa, and built a school in a rural part of Tanzania.” 

“Oh,” Gerard says, feeling like an idiot, “Well did he steal money from the school?”

“It says he funded the project to build the school in the first place,” Pete says.

“I don’t like this link, what’s the next one say?” Gerard says hurriedly, and Pete tries not to laugh at the way Gerard’s acting.

“The next one looks like his company website,” Pete says, “Wait, holy shit.”

“What? What!” Gerard shouts loudly at the look on Pete’s face. He doesn’t know what the reaction means, but he hopes Pete found something bad.

“Did you know that Aaron is the CEO of a huge company?”

“What kind of company? A company that tests on animals? A company that underpays there workers or uses illegal immigrants?”

“A nonprofit organization that provides aid for abuse victims including financial support, medical scholarships for victims of assault, and a lot of other stuff,” Pete says.

“But how does he make money if it’s nonprofit?” Gerard asks, feeling like he’s finally found the dirt.

Pete looks over the webpage in front of him, and his eyes dart across the screen for a moment before he says, “They have a substantial grant from the Government that keeps them running. Frank’s boyfriend is the CEO. It’s a small company, but they do some good work here, actually.”

“Fuck,” Gerard sighs, because Frank is dating a saint. He’s literally dating an angel sent from heaven, and Gerard is being a jerk about it.

“Is there anything else I ought to know about him?” Gerard asks, feeling deflated.

Pete clicks a bunch of links, and then starts shooting even more glowing compliments about Aaron, “he’s a professional violinist.”

“I hate the violin,” Gerard says, but he doesn’t really have an opinion one way or another about the violin.

“Wow, he has his own Wikipedia page,” Pete says. “Oh that’s a really good picture of him. Hot damn, Frank lucked out on this one.”

“Is there anything else I should know? Did he save a litter of kittens from a burning building?” Gerard asks sarcastically.

“He used to be a volunteer fireman,” Pete tells him.

“Ha! _Used_ to be.”

Pete rolls his eyes, “Well yeah, but how long have _you_ been a volunteer fireman, Gerard?”

Gerard scowls, “Valid point.”

“Oh! He won the eighth grade spelling bee for his region,” Pete says.

“I hate him,” Gerard says to himself, and then he realizes that he said that out loud, “I mean, he’s too perfect! He’s got nothing! He’s never done anything wrong. I hate that.”

“Dude, seriously, what is _up_ with you?” Pete asks, looking concerned.

“Nothing,” Gerard snaps, and he turns around for the door, “thanks for that, Pete, but I have to go to work.”

He doesn’t say anything more before he’s walking out of the apartment, huffing to himself. It may be an irrational dislike, and it may be completely absurd, but Gerard doesn’t like Aaron. One way or another, he’ll find himself a valid reason. He just wishes that Frank didn’t pick out the most perfect human being on the planet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a thing above this sentence, you should write a thing below this sentence (in the comment section).


	12. Frank Breaks A Tradition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Gerard gets pissed at him.

Gerard honestly thought that letting a day go by to cool off would do the trick. He thought that would be the key. He decided that he’d just take a day off from worrying about Frank and everything would be okay, because Frank is a big boy. He doesn’t need Gerard’s help. He just decided to take the day off from worrying.

That was a month ago.

It didn’t work.

He’s stuck on this whole Aaron thing, and it’s bothering the crap out of him, but he doesn’t know why. When Frank got back from his second date with Aaron on a Saturday night, Gerard had to go to his room because he felt like puking. He couldn’t even handle seeing them in the same room. 

Then on their third date, Aaron was early and Frank was still taking a shower so Gerard had to talk to the guy. Gerard had to hold himself back from making up lies about Frank to deter Aaron’s interest, but he couldn’t think of anything wrong about Frank. He suddenly couldn’t think of a single flaw Frank had, which is weird, because he does have a lot of flaws. His head just stopped working under pressure though. It’s hard not to talk up Frank. Even despite his flaws, he’s pretty fantastic.

Gerard thinks that they are moving way too quickly, and he really doesn’t want to hear about the time Aaron chased after a thief who stole a lady’s purse. He doesn’t want to hear about that, or the time when Aaron saved some furry little creature from some disastrous location, and got an award from the mayor for being perfect. The only stories Gerard wants to hear about Aaron involve a steamroller, a freak lightning strike or an accident involving a crossbow. Though knowing Aaron, he probably would’ve stopped a steamroller from running over a small child, gotten superpowers from a lightning strike, and caught an arrow flying at him with his bare hands.

He has no words for how he hates Aaron, he just does.

A month passes and they go on date after date, and Gerard’s starting to feel weird about it. The only good thing though is that Aaron hasn’t stayed the night, and Frank hasn’t been out all night. Gerard questions the fact that a month really is a long time, but he is definitely not about to bring it up. It’s not that Gerard thinks Frank is a virgin, but he likes to pretend he is sometimes. It eases his conscience.

Gerard finally has a valid reason for hating Aaron though. After one whole month, and it’s not a very good reason. It took him a month to find one though, so he’s not about to complain, because he finally did find it.

“Aaron’s taking me out tonight,” Frank says, and Gerard stops in his tracks.

“Tonight?” Gerard asks.

“Yes, tonight,” Frank confirms.

“Tonight is Friday,” Gerard tells him, as if hoping that Frank will have some sort of epiphany and cancel the date.

“Yes,” Frank says, nonchalantly.

“It’s Friday, Frank,” Gerard repeats.

“I know what day it is, I have a calendar,” Frank replies.

“Friday.”

“You can stop repeating what day it is Gerard, I know what day it is,” Frank replies.

“Every Friday for the past three years we have watched cheesy horror movies and eaten pizza,” Gerard says, “literally every Friday. No exceptions. We watched horror films and ate pizza even after I had a root canal!”

“Well, it’s just one night,” Frank shrugs.

“No it’s not just one night. We always watch movies on Friday, Frank! You can’t break that tradition, that’s like, not okay.”

“Gerard, it’s just a silly tradition, you’ll live,” Frank tries to justify, and Gerard is tempted to slap Frank across the face to wake him up.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, Frank. You can’t bail out of this because you have a date with a guy you’ve known for a little over a week. Three years we have watched horror movies, and you cannot throw that away now. It’s not ‘we watch movies and eat pizza every night _except_ this one time’ it’s ‘we watch movies and eat pizza on Friday night.’ No exceptions. That’s how it goes.”

“Gerard, you’re making too big a deal out of this,” Frank says. Frank’s not acting like himself, because he’s the one who instituted the tradition in the first place. Gerard is stunned in utter disbelief that Frank could possibly be talking like this. He knows that, on the outside, it’s really not that big of a deal, but it is. It’s a sentimental thing, so yeah, it is a big deal.

“But Pete and Patrick are coming over, and we were going to...” Gerard drifts off, “Aaron will understand, I mean, he’s got to understand that this is our tradition. He can’t impend on that.”

Frank shakes his head, “listen, I know you’re overreacting, but you don’t see that, so I’m not going to argue with you on this one. I’m going to go out with him, and you’ll live.”

“But-”

“It was going to happen eventually,” Frank says, stepping into his room, “we were going to miss a Friday eventually, so we’re just getting this out of the way, I guess. It won’t be so much of a stressful thing to fulfill this tradition anymore. Just calm yourself, Gerard.”

“It’s not stressful! This is just how we spend Friday nights!” Gerard yells at Frank, who’s walked into his room in an attempt to ignore Gerard, “Pete and Patrick-”

“Are always here anyway, it’s not a special occasion.”

“Mikey’s coming over!”

“Mikey is always over.”

“He is not,” Gerard replies.

“He’s here a lot,” Frank counters.

“Well, yeah, but, Frank!” Gerard says, groaning out Frank’s name obnoxiously.

“I’m not going to debate about this. I don’t want to cancel my date,” Frank says, walking back into the living room.

Gerard huffs, and his foot stomps on the floor. Ever since Frank’s been seeing Aaron he’s always with him. He’s almost never here anymore, and it’s starting to really pile up. He has a date nearly three times a week. 

That’s what Gerard hates about Aaron. He’s hogging Frank. Aaron is monopolizing all of Frank’s time and that is not okay.

Gerard scowls, and crosses his arms, trying to find a way to say what he thinks without coming across as rude. He can’t say the truth though without being rude. The absolute truth is that Frank doesn’t have time for his friends anymore, and it’s only been a month. What will it be like in two months?

Gerard looks over at Frank, with his jaw set, “when did Aaron become more important than your friends, Frank? Because you certainly don’t give a damn about us anymore.”

Frank stands stunned for a minute, because that was a fairly cold thing to say, especially considering Gerard is the least arguable person in the world. He will literally do anything to avoid confrontation, and the last thing he would ever do is _initiate_ it.

“Gerard, I-”

“Whatever, Frank,” Gerard says, and turns to the door, “have fun on your date, it’s not a big deal. It’s just a three year tradition. Pointless. I’ll be at Pete’s, I don’t want to be here when your date comes.”

“Gerard!” Frank calls after him, but Gerard’s making his dramatic exit before he can respond. You can’t just stop during your dramatic exit, that makes the drama part go away, which means you just sort of exit. It’s not as fun that way.

Gerard takes sanctuary in Pete’s apartment while Patrick lectures him about being polite. Gerard is actually the _second_ least arguable person in the world. Behind Patrick.

“I kind of don’t blame Gerard actually,” Pete says finally, “I mean, it’s something we’ve been doing for a long time. Three years or so. It’s really rude of Frank to just flake out on us, because he got a better offer. Aaron may be his boyfriend, but we’re his friends.”

“Were supposed to be happy that he’s happy,” Patrick says. He’s taking Frank’s side in the dispute.

“But at what cost,” Gerard responds, “it’s one thing to hang out with your boyfriend, it’s another to leave your friends behind you.”

“He’s not doing that,” Patrick says.

Pete makes a ‘well’ sound and then says, “He kind of is. Missing a Batman marathon is one thing, but missing a tradition we’ve had for three years is a totally different thing. I mean, Patrick, you’re looking at it like this is just pizza and movies, and on the outside, yeah, it _is_ just pizza and movies, but there’s this whole maudlin structure to it.”

“You must see it differently than I do,” Patrick says, “it’s just a thing you do on Friday’s.”

Pete tries to give Gerard a look that says something like ‘sorry about the new guy,’ but it’s not like he’s actually new. Pete’s been dating the guy for nearly three years, it’s not recent. Pete’s a little ridiculous though.

Gerard’s phone starts ringing a second later, and he sighs, but looks down at the caller ID.

“Mikey what do you want,” Gerard asks a moment later.

“You’re not at home, but I know where you hide the key, so I‘m just going to steal all of your stuff,” he replies.

Gerard walks over to the door, opens it, and pokes his head out to look at Mikey standing a little ways down the hall. He looks over at Gerard and frowns at him.

“We don’t even hide a key,” Gerard says, speaking into the receiver for some reason.

“I took a shot,” Mikey shrugged.

Gerard rolls his eyes, and then looks back into the apartment, “I’m going to go make sure that Mikey hasn’t committed any crimes in the past week-”

“Only two,” Mikey interrupts.

“Right, I’m going to go hire Mikey a lawyer. I will see you two later.”

Pete nods and says, “Well since Frank’s gone that means we can-”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence,” Gerard stops Pete before he says anything more.

“Make macaroni art,” Pete says with a toothy grin.

Gerard hangs his head slightly and closes the door behind him when he leaves.

“Gerard, dear brother, I think that was an innuendo.”

“No shit, Sherlock.”

Gerard unlocks the door and Mikey walks in before him like he owns the place. He strides across the kitchen, and turns when he gets to the counter that separates the kitchen from the living room.

“Please,” Gerard says to the empty hallway, “come in. Make yourself at home.”

“You’re really slow on the uptake,” Mikey notes, when he sits at the counter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I think there's going to be an update on this tomorrow as well.


	13. Gerard Loves Frank

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well it had to happen sooner or later.

“So I saw Frank leaving with a dashing human being a few minutes ago, and bear in mind that I’m the heterosexual in the room, but even I saw that that was a beautiful man,” Mikey says, because he isn’t one for easing into a conversation. Mikey is subtle as Voldemort is polite. So in other words, he isn’t.

Gerard makes a face, and shivers at how disgusting it is that even his own brother is gaga over Aaron. Aaron can do no wrong, and he has a stupidly nice face. Gerard hates him.

“You don’t like said gentleman, I presume,” Mikey says. 

“Why do you say that?”

“You just made a face like you ate a lemon,” Mikey replies, “and I don’t see any citrus fruits so I’m thinking you don’t like Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome.”

“That’s Frank’s boyfriend,” Gerard says.

“Oh, so that’s the enigmatic Aaron you hate so much! Given the pieces I was given, I really should’ve figured out that puzzle sooner,” Mikey says that last part more to himself than Gerard.

“Yeah you really should have. That’s Aaron, and I hate him. I hate him more than I hate fucking anything.”

“More than you hate the Vince Vaughn remake of Psycho?”

“ _Way_ more than I hate the Vince Vaughn remake of Psycho,” Gerard responds.

“Whoa dude. This is serious,” Mikey says, “so why do you hate him then?”

“I don’t know, I just do.”

“You have to give me an answer.”

“I,” Gerard starts, but he doesn’t have anything to say, “He’s too perfect.”

“A real answer.”

“I don’t know! I mean, I just don’t like him. I guess, I feel like I just don’t want Frank to be going out with people. I don’t know why. I really can’t explain it, okay? I just don’t like it,” Gerard says.

“Why though? You need a reason!”

“I don’t like it! I thought I wanted that for him, but now he’s getting too close to other people, and I don’t want him to be. I want him to spend time with me. I don’t know,” Gerard shrugs.

Mikey’s eyes widen and he asks, “Are you jealous? Are you jealous that he’s hanging out with Aaron instead of you?”

“I’m not... I’m not jealous! I just don’t like him being with someone else. He’s my best friend, I want him to hang out with me. He’s, like, the best person in my life. I don’t want him to forget about me, and spend more time with other people. I want him to spend time with _me_.”

“Gerard, you’re jealous,” Mikey says.

“I’m not!”

“Can you picture your life without Frank there?” Mikey questions.

“What? No! I don’t want to. I’d hate to live without him. Like, that’s the scariest thing in the fucking world. I don’t ever want to stop living with Frank, ever. I mean, I don’t know, I just feel, like I want him to always be there, until I’m all old and shit. I just really want him there for the rest of my life,” Gerard says, almost nonchalantly.

Mikey’s jaw has dropped so far that it’s almost stretched down to the floor, “Gerard, can you fucking hear yourself?”

“What? He’s my best friend, Mikes! I don’t want to lose him,” Gerard says.

“You’re jealous of Aaron.”

“I am not. Aaron is his boyfriend, why would I want to be-”

“Gerard, you’re in love with Frank,” Mikey states, with complete deadpan, “You’re in love with him! You want Frank with you for the rest of your life. You love him. You fucking love him!”

“I do not!” Gerard argues quickly, “I absolutely do not love him. How could you think that? I don’t love him, Mikey.”

“Yeah, you kinda do,” Mikey says.

“No, love is something different altogether. Frank is the best person I know, okay. He makes me really happy when he’s around, and he’s the best roommate in the world. I like seeing him happy, and seeing him happy makes me happy. He’s my best friend though.”

“Would you sleep with Frank if you could?”

“What!” Gerard asks, looking scandalized, “what? I’m not going to answer that! Mikey, that’s completely inappropriate.”

“You didn’t say no. You totally would, I know you would,” Mikey shakes his head. “You love Frank.”

“He’s my best friend.”

“You’re in love with him,” Mikey says.

“Frank is great, okay? Can I picture my life without him? No. Do I ever want to live without him? No. Do I want to see him every day for the rest of my life? Yes. Is he the nicest person I know? Yes. Is he the reason that I smile when I wake up every morning? Yeah. Does he make me laugh all the time without trying? Yes. All those things might be true, but... _fuck_.”

Mikey looks at him expectantly as Gerard’s whole face falls, and his eyes widen like a frog. He looks like he’s just had the biggest epiphany of his life. The biggest epiphany of anybody’s life.

“Mikey,” Gerard says worriedly, “Mikes, shit. _Shit_. Fuck!”

“What is it, Gerard?” Mikey asks completely stone-cold, because he knows precisely what it is.

“I think I’m in love with my best fucking friend,” Gerard says.

“Yes, Gerard.”

“Fuck! How did I not realize that? How could I have overlooked something as big as this? This is huge, Mikes. How did I not realize this?”

“You’re a fucking idiot,” Mikey replies.

“Yes I am! I’m a huge, gigantic fucking idiot, who’s so fucking unbelievably stupid it hurts, because I fucking love Frank. Legitimately! I’m in love with him. I love that son of a bitch more than anything in the entire fucking world, and I cannot believe I didn’t know that!”

“I can’t believe you didn’t know that either!” Mikey says exasperatedly. 

Gerard falls onto the counter with his back slumped, “how did I not figure that out?”

“You’re a lot dumber than I thought you were,” Mikey comments.

“Please no,” Gerard shakes his head, “no Mikey, don’t do that. This is fucking wrong. This is so messed up. I can’t believe... I can’t even believe this.”

Mikey frowns, because his normal sarcastic behavior is not exactly welcome right here and now.

“This is sick! I can’t be in love with Frank,” Gerard says, picking his head up, “but I fucking am. Oh fuck. Why do I have to be in love with Frank?”

“I have no idea,” Mikey says.

“Why did no one tell me?” he asks.

Mikey just looks at the lump on the counter and sighs. Mikey didn’t put two and two together until Gerard just practically announced it a minute ago. He almost lets the secret out that Frank’s in love with Gerard, but he stops himself. He doesn’t know whether that’s still true or not, because there’s a new guy in his life now. A new guy who isn’t Gerard. Also it’s not Mikey’s secret to tell.

“Dude, I don’t know what to tell you.”

“My life is over,” Gerard’s muffled voice says from where he’s stuck his head into his arm.

“You’re being a bit melodramatic.”

“I’m in love with my best friend who is dating the most perfect fucking human ever, and they’ll probably get married, and have little adopted babies that Aaron saved from some remote village in Uganda.”

“They’re not going to get married, Gerard. You’re just really emotional right now, because you figured out that you’re in love with someone you should have known you were in love,” Mikey says.

“Oh god, how long have I been in love with him? Has it been ever since he moved in? Jesus fuck, there were like four other people who wanted his room and I chose Frank, was that because I was falling in love with him already? Mikey, how did it take me five years to realize this?”

“I don’t know!” Mikey says, “You really should have, how did you not figure that out?”

“I literally am the dumbest person on the planet. I am dumber than Paris Hilton. I am so _stupid_.”

“Okay, calm down,” Mikey says, raising his arms like he’s ready to surrender, “just breathe in and out, okay? So, are we absolutely sure that you are indeed in love with Frank? Are you positive that’s what’s going on?”

“I think so?” He says, “I’ve never been in love before, what’s it supposed to feel like?”

“Tell me about Frank. In your own words, describe him,” Mikey instructs.

Gerard frowns and thinks for a moment, then he gets this little telling smile on his face, “He’s my best friend. I like hearing him talk, even when he’s talking about things I don’t care about. I like to look after him when he’s sick. When his nose is all red, and his limbs are too weak to even move, and he’s so innocent. I love the way his voice sounds when he’s singing in the shower, and doesn’t think anyone can hear him. I love the way that his given choice of shower song is usually Disney or a show tune. I like being around him, even when he’s angry at me. 

“I miss him when he leaves the room for more than ten minutes. That’s how you feel when your best friend isn’t there though. The world just kind of seems less special if he’s not there. But that’s normal.”

“No it’s isn’t, you dunderhead, that’s how you feel when your significant other leaves the room!” Mikey tells him, and Gerard looks confused. He’s actually that oblivious, he didn’t know that was a normal feeling.

“I’m sorry?”

“God you’re such a fucking idiot. Okay, do you like, when you’re out shopping, and you see something cool, do you picture how Frank would react to seeing it, or do you just react by yourself to how you feel?”

Gerard looks at Mikey like he’s an alien, “well if it’s something Frank would like-”

“Oh my god, you’re in love with Frank.”

“I am, aren’t I?” Gerard asks. “This is disastrous. How do I stop it?”

“Stop what? Loving him? Dude, you don’t. You live with it, or you act on it. I mean, it can take years and years and _years_ of hard work to fall out of love,” Mikey says, “and sometimes you can’t _ever_ fall out of love.”

“I’m screwed,” Gerard says in defeat.

“Okay dude, don’t raise the white flag yet. Frank’s just dating a guy. It’s been a month, he’s been in-” Mikey catches himself almost too late on that one, because he almost tells Gerard that Frank’s loved him for five years. “He’s, uh, been in relationships before. They never lasted.”

“Yeah, but I introduced him to those guys!” Gerard says, “And he hated all of them. He met Aaron by himself, and he’s in love with the guy already!”

“Frank’s not in love with Aaron.”

“Yes he is!”

“He is not,” Mikey replies, “Gerard, it’s been one month. One month out of one year, out of several years of his life. This is barely a blip in time when you look at his entire lifespan.”

“Why on earth did I set him up on dates,” Gerard asks himself, completely ignoring Mikey. “Why would I do that? How did I not realize back then that I love him? How could that not have computed? I’m so dumb I might as well become a politician.”

Gerard’s eyes are out of focus, and he’s starting to wheeze. It looks like he’s having an asthma attack which is strange because he’s not asthmatic. Mikey jumps to the next most likely conclusion and that is the idea that Gerard’s having a panic attack.

“Okay, Gerard, what do you need right now? Paper bag?”

“I want Frank!”

“Gerard,” Mikey says, standing up, “you need to go crawl into bed with a box of Oreos and a cheesy movie.”

“That’s not a cure! That’s not a cure for this horrible, all-consuming love I have. Fuck, I’m in love with Frank,” he says again, “no matter how many times I say it, it’s sounds even more absurd, but it’s so weird, because I know it’s true.”

“Oh it’s definitely true,” Mikey says, “You love him, but you need to settle down.”

“But what if Frank gets married to Aaron, and what if he asks me to be his best man, because I swear to god, I’m more likely to push Aaron off a cliff than I am to let him marry Frank.”

“I’m going to repeat this one last time, Gerard. They have been dating for a _month_. They are nothing more than a couple right now. It’s not serious,” Mikey says.

“Yet.”

“Okay, well... what do you propose you do?”

“Sabotage it!” Gerard says confidently.

“Okay, no. You are not going to sabotage their relationship. Frank is your best friend, and while you are in love with him, you should want him to be happy.”

“I want him to be happy with me,” Gerard says.

“Tough shit, Gerard, because you didn’t get there in time!” Mikey says, sounding ready to blow his top at Gerard. “You missed your window, okay? It’s unfortunate, and the world is cruel, but it’s true! You missed the window, and now you just have to hope that you’ll get another chance, but you know what, that’s all you can hope for. You can’t pray for Aaron to die in a freak accident, because that’s not the right thing to do. The right thing to do is just try to make Frank happy, and maybe someday, he’ll be free, and you can ask him out, but until then, you have to wait and be patient.”

“But it’s hard.”

“Yeah, it’s hard, but it’s life,” Mikey says.

“I hate this,” Gerard mopes, and his head takes its place back in the bundle of his arms.

“Join the club,” Mikey groans as he looks at his miserable brother. This is going to be a Mount Everest of an impasse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I doubt there will be an update on this tomorrow, but three days is nothing to turn your nose up at.


	14. Frank Still Loves Gerard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I lied about the lack of update, but it was unintentional. This chapter was an accident.

Mikey’s fingers drum against the counter meticulously for several minutes. He doesn’t seem to know what to do other than sit in the silence. The whole room is quiet, and he’s the only person there. Gerard finally clocked out an hour ago after a record amount of crying. He was not very good at communicating his emotions after he had that little revelation.

It feels like it takes days rather than an hour, but Mikey finally hears someone at the lock. Mikey lifts his head up, and crosses his fingers that Frank will be alone. He’s got half a mind to yell at Frank for ditching on the Friday tradition, which Gerard is religiously in tuned to. He decides against that though, he’ll just get right down to business.

“Hey Frank,” Mikey says, when he steps into the apartment.

“Uh, hi Mikey?” Frank says, and looks around, “Strange to find my roommates brother in my apartment, but no roommate.”

“What? Oh, I threw his body in the ocean, but that’s not important right now.”

“What _is_ important then?”

“Well, that’s weird, actually. It’s Gerard. We need to talk about Gerard.”

“Is this like the ‘We Need to Talk About Kevin’ thing, because I’ve really never seen Gerard as a murderer. He just doesn’t have that kind of personality,” Frank says, throwing his jacket off and onto a hanger, before he turns and walks into the kitchen. Mikey’s standing on the other side of the counter watching Frank a little too intently.

“I heard you have a boyfriend,” Mikey says, getting right into things.

“Uh, yeah?” Frank replies, “But I don’t see what this has to do with-”

“But last I checked you were in love with my brother. Now you have a boyfriend, who is not my brother, and that kind of contradicts the whole being in love with Gerard thing,” Mikey’s voice is quiet. Quiet enough that, if by some happenstance, Gerard is awake in the other room, he won’t be able to hear.

Frank frowns, “I guess, but I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

“Well I just want to know where you stand now. Do you still love him, or what? What’s going on with you?”

“I don’t know. I’m kind of at a crossroads. I think I’m starting to get over Gerard,” Frank says, smiling. It’s been a long time coming. He has spent way too long being in love with Gerard, and he’s finally getting past that. He just might be falling in love with someone else.

“Okay, so you don’t like Gerard?” Mikey asks, nervously. Usually he’d be really happy to hear that come out of Frank’s mouth, but the circumstances have changed. This is all really bad timing. If Gerard had only figured out his emotions out a month ago, things wouldn’t be so messy and uncomfortable. 

“I just gave you my answer, what more do you want?” 

“Percentages. I work best with numbers on the table,” Mikey says.

“God, I don’t even understand you,” Frank shakes his head and grabs himself a glass of water. “Okay so, if I had to tell you how in love with Gerard I am, I’d say it’s like, an even 50/50.”

“And how in love with your boyfriend are you?”

“You have no respect for people’s privacy do you, Mikey?” Frank asks.

“Not particularly.” 

“Okay, fine, I mean, I guess I’m not in love with Aaron at all right now. I’m in like with him, if you want to use an annoying term to describe it, but it’s nothing more than that yet. I think the potential for me to be in love with him is really high though,” Frank says.

Mikey doesn’t know if his face shows the disappointment, but Frank probably wouldn’t detect it even if he did. The difference it would make in Mikey’s face is so negligible, it need not be factored at all.

“So if my brother were to suddenly burst out of his room and ask you out, would you say yes?” Mikey inquires.

“Well that’s a hell of a ‘what if.’ It’s not going to happen, we both know that. I don’t want to play the what if game,” Frank shakes his head, and leans up against the counter. 

Mikey groans, because he wants to be able to say that it’s a lot less unlikely than it was a day ago.

“But, I mean, it’s just a hypothetical question! There’s no repercussions or anything!”

“Mikey, we both know that Gerard doesn’t love me,” Frank says. Mikey looks down at the ground so that he can roll his eyes at Frank’s statement.

Frank continues, “We both know that he could never love me, and it’s not unlikely that he’ll never love anyone. I’ve spent five fucking _years_ trying to come to terms with that. Five years is a long time, too long, to let someone drive you around, but he has. He really has. I love Gerard, still do, quite a bit, but it’s never going to be more than one sided. That sucks, but I’ve had to live with that knowledge a long time. Gerard does not love me, and I’m finally starting to push past that. I’m finally starting to carve my own path, and get away from his hold on me. You should be proud of that progress in me, Mikey. I’m really trying my hardest, and it’s really paying off.”

“But...” Mikey starts, but there’s really nothing he can say. He can’t say anything because then he’ll accidentally tell Frank that Gerard passed out an hour ago when his brain overloaded from all his bottled up love for Frank. Mikey can’t say anything to contradict Frank, because then he’ll either seem like a jackass, or he’ll give everything away. 

Frank can’t move on from Gerard though. Now Gerard’s got the love bug, and it doesn’t help the situation that it’s transferred. That’s not fair to anyone. All it does is shake up the problem.

“How do you know Aaron is the guy that’ll get you past your feelings for Gerard?”

“I don’t know that at all,” Frank shrugged, “but that doesn’t matter. I don’t even know if he’ll do that. I don’t know how much of the load he’ll take off my back, but he’s a good start. If things don’t work out with him, than I’ve got this part of me that knows I’m strong. I know I’m strong enough to get past this, so if it all goes to hell, at least I’m already half way out of the shadow that’s been holding me back.”

“Well... do you think that maybe Gerard deserves to know?” Mikey asks. He’s going to swing this anyway he possibly can. Gerard’s too afraid to confront Frank about his feelings, that became clear two hours ago when he started balling his eyes out, but Frank’s a different story. At the moment, Frank’s emotions are more intact than Gerard’s. That’s the first time that’s happened in five years. This is a million times rarer than a blue moon.

Mikey might be able to convince Frank to open up to Gerard. It’s not likely, because he’s spent five years compiling all this pent up affection, but he’s a little more stable now. Frank’s got one foot out the door, and Mikey seems to be the only one now intent on making sure he doesn’t get the other foot out too. If he does, Gerard will be in the exact position Frank’s running from. He needs to make sure Frank doesn’t get over that fence, and instead falls flat on his face in the grass on the side he started on.

“Why would I tell Gerard?” Frank asks.

“Because he’s your best friend, and you’ve been keeping this secret from him for five years,” Mikey scrambles.

“It’s because he’s my best friend that I can’t tell him. That would make things uncomfortable,” Frank tells him. “You never tell a guy you like him. It makes you look like an idiot!”

Mikey opens his mouth to say something, but Frank interrupts him, “Listen, it’s nearly midnight, I’m tired, Gerard’s probably asleep, and you don’t live here.”

“Is that your way of telling me to leave?” Mikey asks.

“No,” Frank says, and he steps towards the door, pulls it open and then gestures for Mikey to move, “this is.”

“You’re so rude,” Mikey says, and walks towards the door, “This conversation isn’t over.”

“Actually it is,” Frank says, “and if you ever try to bring it up again, I’ll castrate you.”

“That provided a fairly disconcerting visual,” Mikey says, making a face.

“It was meant to,” Frank says. Frank feels like it takes a century to get him to leave, but finally he closes the door behind Mikey.

Frank makes his way over to his room, grabbing his forehead by the temples, and trying to cast away the uncertainties. He’s in love with Gerard, sure, but it’s not that bad. He likes Aaron too. Aaron is nice. Aaron is safe. Frank really needs safe right about now.

Frank undresses in a haze, and he’s almost not aware what’s happening until he hits the mattress.

His brain won’t shut up though. Now all he can do is worry about how he still likes Gerard. It’s only been a month. He tries to ease himself with the knowledge that it hasn’t been long enough. He hasn’t noticed the difference yet, because it’s not made a huge effect on him. He’s still in love with Gerard, but that doesn’t mean he will be forever.

Frank hits his head against the pillow, and tells himself to stop thinking about the man on the other side of the wall. 

Except the walls are thin, and Gerard’s not asleep. Blush rises to Frank’s face so quickly, that it feels like his face was set on fire. He grabs his pillow and tries to drown out the noise, but it’s hard. 

Frank has dreamed about those noises so much in his life. He’s dreamed about being the one to get Gerard to make them. He’s dreamed of rolling around in Gerard’s sheets, smelling him on them, and the contentment that that would bring him is unimaginable.

Frank’s eyes clasp together, as he starts to realize what his brain is doing to him. He tries to send the thoughts away with anything. He pictures dead puppies, The Blaire Witch, and boobs, but to no avail. He’s not fooling anyone, especially himself. Frank looks down at his lower half, because this is really unfortunate timing. He’s just tried to convince Mikey that he was falling out of love, and now he’s taking a million steps back.

He frowns, and then drags himself slowly out of bed. This is a routine he’s grown accustomed to over the years. Frank can’t exactly ‘take care of business’ with the walls so thin. Gerard’s probably not even aware of how thin they are, because Frank is careful. He pulls himself out of his bed, slowly creeps out of his room and over to the bathroom. He then turns the shower on, and it blocks out the noise. Sometimes he just takes a shower, but usually it’s for noise cancellation purposes. The few times Gerard’s ever asked about it, he’d just explained that he thought he saw a spider, and had to shower to make the sensation of bugs crawling over him go away.

Maybe he’s not as over Gerard as he’d liked to think.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note the use of an Oxford comma at "The Blaire Witch, and boobs." I kind of like the alternative though.


	15. Gerard is Miserable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrick and Pete learn something new.

“You look really cheerful, and honestly it’s kind of freaking me out,” Pete says.

“What?” Frank asks, “Oh it’s nothing.”

“No it’s not nothing,” Pete says, “you look like one of those clowns that has a smile painted on their face. It’s scaring me a little bit, because a clown killed my family.”

“That’s absolutely not true,” Patrick says. “But you do look happy. Have you been sniffing air fresheners again?”

“That implies that there was a previous incident where Frank was getting high off of Febreze,” Pete says.

“You’re right,” Patrick nods, “though I don’t know it always smells really canned in here. Maybe Frank’s got some extracurricular activities that he hasn’t told us about.”

“Am I even here?” Frank asks, because Patrick and Pete have started having a conversation without him in his own apartment.

“Yes, why do you ask?” Pete says, “Oh, and why are you so happy?”

“I’m just going on a date tonight,” Frank says, “and Aaron said it would be special.”

“Frank’s getting laid tonight,” Pete says grinning like a little kid hearing a dirty joke in the schoolyard.

“You are so immature,” Frank says.

“You denied nothing,” Patrick says, raising an eyebrow.

Frank shrugs, and Pete snorts, “oh my god, he actually _is_ going to get laid tonight.”

“Would you shut up?” Frank says, because he’s starting to feel himself blush. It’s only been a few hours since last night, and Frank’s not quite over what happened. On one hand, it’s really awkward and uncomfortable to listen to someone else jerk off, but add in the fact that Frank’s head over heels in love with the guy, makes it so much worse. It couldn’t get any worse. Frank’s trying to psyche himself out, because telling himself that he’s attracted to Aaron is the only thing he can do to stop himself from liking Gerard. It’s not working very well.

“Your face says it all, bro,” Pete smirks.

“Can’t a guy just be happy without being a sex crazed lunatic?” Frank asks.

“No,” Pete deadpans.

“Yeah, I’m going to go with no.”

Frank shakes his head, “You two are literally the worst people I know.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Pete replies, “Where’s Gerard?”

“He’s been in his room all day,” Frank shrugs, “I think he might be coming down with something.”

“Should you be going out if Gerard is sick?”

“He told me to,” Frank responds, “I literally tried to cancel, but he insisted. He’s always like that when he’s sick. Always trying to make sure he doesn’t ruin someone else’s plans. He told me to go, so who am I to refuse?”

“So are you still in love with him or did you finally get off of Gerard’s hook?”

“Why the fuck is everyone asking me that?” Frank exclaims, “Mikey asked me the same thing last night. Did I do something? Am I acting differently or something? Do I look like I’m over him?”

“Well _are_ you?” Patrick questions.

“Of fucking course not.”

“So Aaron’s effect on you isn’t even working?” Pete asks.

“You make him sound like a prostitute,” Frank frowns, “he’s my boyfriend, not an object. We’ve only been dating for a little while, of course I don’t love him yet, but maybe I will someday. Maybe. We just need to wait a while.”

“You’re putting a lot of faith into that idea,” Patrick replies, “He is just a guy, Frank. Not a miracle worker.”

“You’re making it sound really depressing,” Pete says, “Frank, if you don’t have confidence than you’re never going to get anywhere. Seriously, you’ve got to do some trying if you’re ever going to get anywhere. Aaron’s not the one who’s going to change your life, Frank, you are. I believe you can, you’re a pretty strong guy.”

“Too sappy,” Frank makes a face of revulsion, and shudders.

“I thought it was uplifting,” Pete says looking sad.

“Elevators are uplifting,” Patrick says.

“No, elevators just _lift_ you _upward_.”

“Why do I even try making inspirational speeches? No one listens? They just call me a twat and tell me to go away,” Pete asks no one in particular.

“It’s because you’re a sentimentalist,” Patrick says, “and no one likes you.”

“You live with him,” Frank points out.

“Don’t remind me,” Patrick rolls his eyes.

“I don’t-” Frank’s interrupted by knocking at the door, and he puts on a nervous smile, that is somewhat plastic. He hopes it doesn’t look forced, but it is. He feels guilty about going on a date with Aaron after the events that took place last night. He hasn’t even talked to Gerard about it, and he never will, because that would be a hundred different types of awkward.

It’s hard not to let those memories affect him now though. He’s going on a date with someone who is not the guy he was _thinking_ about last night.

“Oh he’s here,” Frank says, and part of him is actually excited to get away from Gerard. His feelings always seems to gain power when he’s around Gerard, because being in close proximity makes all the feelings rush at him like a moth to a flame. It’s kind of like Frank is a riverbed, and Gerard is the river, only there’s a dam that separates the two, but when the dam is open, there’s nothing stopping the raging current that knocks Frank off his feet. Being away from Gerard is the dam, and being near him, talking to him, looking at him, that’s the release of overflowing water.

“Frank’s gonna have sex,” Pete says in a singsong voice.

“I hate you both so much more than you know,” Frank says through his gritted teeth, “Whether or not that’s true is none of your business-”

“When was the last time you got laid anyway? You’ve been in love with your roommate for-fucking-ever, so how could you have gotten lucky anytime in the last, like, five years?” Pete states.

“We’re not having this conversation!”

“It’s fairly one-sided,” Patrick chips in.

“I... ugh, just check on Gerard to see if he’s okay,” Frank says as he grabs his things, and heads to the door.

“I will avoid telling him that you’re getting laid.”

“Like he’d even care, he doesn’t like me anyhow,” Frank grumbles, “Patrick, keep Pete away from anything flammable.”

“Will do.”

“You have such little faith in me,” Pete sighs.

“Can you blame him?”

“No, not really, but still, I have feelings.”

Frank rolls his eyes, and makes a hasty escape out the door. Aaron’s gotten used to being ushered away from Frank’s apartment quickly, and it’s not because he doesn’t want to show off his gorgeous boyfriend, he’s just sure that his friends would scare Aaron away. They can lay it on a little heavy. They’d probably somehow convince Aaron that Frank escaped from an insane asylum without ever even having to say the words ‘insane asylum.’

Pete does make an attempt to engage Aaron in conversation before the door closes, but Frank gives him a look that is known to have stopped hearts in the past. Frank’s got a whole stack of bodies to his name from that death glare alone.

“Is he gone?” A voice yells from Gerard’s room. 

Pete turns to look at Patrick asking the silent question, ‘do we run away from him, or stay here to find out what he wants?’

Patrick’s silent response is something to the extent of, ‘of course dumbass, he’s our friend. What kind of friends would we be if we ran the fuck away?’ Something like that, but without the swearing, because Patrick reacts like a sheltered fourth grader whenever he hears the cursed ‘F-word.’

“Yes, Gerard, Frank’s gone. Why?” Patrick shouts back.

The door opens to unveil a heavily unkempt, and dejected looking Gerard clinging to a duvet that’s wrapped around his back, and held on by his pale fingers. His hair looks like it was the battleground for a genocidal massacre, and he’s wearing a severely battered looking Ramones shirt. It’s probably not even classifiable as a shirt at this point in its lifeline, because it honestly looks more like a giant dishrag.

“I’m having a bad day.”

“You look like hell,” Pete states the obvious.

“Frank said you were feeling sick,” Patrick says, and Gerard walks over to the couch where he then collapses, like a weight was dropped onto his shoulders out of nowhere. It kind of looked like a cheap stage dive from a half-assed stunt double on a shitty action movie.

“I feel like shit. I feel worse than shit. I feel like the shittiest shit that’s ever fucking existed,” Gerard announces.

“Well that’s not good, what’s wrong?” Patrick asks, walking over to the couch to look down at Gerard over the back. Gerard doesn’t look back he just looks at the ceiling with a glazed over expression. He has some pretty substantial bags under his eyes that make him look like a cadaver.

“Can I tell you something that you guys are going to laugh at me for, because it proves that I’m the worst human being on the planet?”

“Uh... yes?” Patrick says in the form of a question.

“Well I may or may not have been the biggest fucking idiot in the world for a total of five years,” Gerard says.

“Okay, that’s really vague, can you add a little more detail?” Pete asks. He hasn’t moved from his spot at the kitchen counter, but he can see over the couch enough to see the tops of Gerard’s bent knees.

“I don’t know if I should tell you...” Gerard says.

“You just asked if you could tell us,” Patrick responds.

“But that was before I thought it through all the way. I shouldn’t tell you. You’ll only make fun of me for it.”

“If it’s got you this down in the dumps, I can promise you we won’t say anything,” Patrick says.

“Besides you must have told Frank whatever it is already, because he’s your best friend and you tell him everything,” Pete says, sounding a tad bitterer than he’d intended to. He doesn’t really mind that Frank and Gerard are better friends, because he and Patrick are better friends, he just really likes knowing secrets. Pete likes gossip. He doesn’t like to start it, but he likes being in on it.

“Trust me, I have not told Frank,” Gerard answers.

“What could you tell us that you can’t tell Frank? Unless... no!” Patrick looks scandalized, “Is it _about_ Frank?”

Gerard pulls the blanket up over his head so that Patrick can’t see his face, but he makes a nodding gesture that is understandable despite the comforter being in the way.

“Is it about Aaron?” Pete asks, “Did you find some dirt on Aaron?”

Gerard sighs, because it is in part about Aaron. It’s about how he wants to throw Aaron off a bridge, because he’s in love with Aaron’s boyfriend.

“It’s sort of about him,” Gerard whispers in a tiny, childlike voice.

“Did he do something?” Patrick asks.

“It’s mostly about Frank,” Gerard confesses.

“Well, what _about_ Frank though?”

“I don’t wanna say,” Gerard responds.

“Then Patrick and I can be of no assistance,” Pete declares.

“But I need moral support, because my life is so fucked up!” Gerard says, popping his head out from the covers. If his hair was an atrocity before, it’s a holocaust now.

“How fucked up?” Pete questions.

“Massively, calamitously, extraordinarily, unimpededly, tremendously, catastrophically, cataclysmically, and every other adverb or adjective or whatever the fuck part of speech those words are. That’s how fucked up.”

“So really fucked up,” Pete nods along.

“Yah, I guess you could say that,” Gerard spits vehemently. He’s not in a good mood, and apparently he’s irate as hell too.

“Alright Mr. Grumpyumpous,” Patrick says, because when you don’t cuss, you’re forced to think creatively, “just calm down.”

“He’s a riled up curmudgeon, isn’t he?” Pete says like it’s a matter of fact.

“That is a phenomenal word. Good job.”

“Thanks, I saw it in a crossword puzzle,” Pete smiles with pride.

“Can we get back to my life-ruining dilemma maybe?” Gerard interjects.

“Right, sorry,” Patrick turns to look back at Gerard, “but you have to tell us or we can’t do anything to help.”

Gerard huffs with pure frustration and slips his words out like word vomit, “I’m in love with Frank, okay?”

Patrick stops breathing for a moment, and he’s fairly sure that some deity is playing a practical joke on him, because he did not just hear those words come out of Gerard’s mouth. He did not just hear _Gerard_ , the spokesman of uninterested, confess to loving Frank. He must need to get new glasses because that’s not Gerard there at all. It can’t be. Frank and Gerard switched bodies, that has to be it. This is a serious case of Freaky Friday and Gerard is Jamie Lee Curtis.

It’s a practical joke or something. Ashton Kutcher is about to hop out from behind the curtains, and this is all going to be some big prank. Gerard is going to burst out laughing at any minute, and the bags under his eyes are actually made out of makeup.

Except none of those things are happening, and Gerard is looking up at him with pure unadulterated adamancy in his face. Gerard looks like a combination between afraid, angry, and fucking sick, but he’s also sure of himself.

Patrick turns in his spot, like he’s about to start a show stopping dance number consisting only of The Twist, and he looks at Pete’s reaction. Pete looks like Patrick feels.

Pete’s face has turned to an expression of utter shock, and he gets a concerned look in his eyes before he says simply, “Well fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may or may not be aware of this already, but curmudgeonly is, in fact, my favorite word.


	16. Frank is Breaking Gerard's Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes you just gotta take comfort in Scooby Doo.

“How long has this been going on?” Patrick asks.

“I think five years?” Gerard says.

Patrick’s eyes literally get so wide that there’s a serious danger of them falling out of his head.

“Five _years_?” Are you sure you didn’t mean to say days? Or hours? Maybe minutes?”

“No, it’s been about five years,” Gerard nods.

“How did we not notice that?” Pete exclaims. He’s stood up, and has made his way to stand beside on the couch to look down at Gerard who looks thoroughly dolorous.

“I’m having a really bad day,” Gerard mumbles.

“Okay, so you need to explain what’s going on, because Frank’s been-” Pete tries to say ‘in love with you for that long too,’ but Patrick kicks him in the shin. After a mewling sound and an attempt to give Patrick an angry look, Pete just sighs and lays his arms on the back of the couch, and puts his head in the center of them.

“Frank’s what?” Gerard inquires.

“Pete just meant that you’ve known Frank for five years. If you’ve been in love with the guy all this time, how come you never... never said anything? Never told him, or Pete, or anything. What’s up?” Patrick says, “I mean Gerard, I’ve known you for three years, and you’ve never shown the slightest interest in Frank before.”

“Well it’s just that I didn’t know I was in love until yesterday. I just thought he was like my best friend. My really really close best friend. I thought it was just that, because I didn’t know it was anything else. I mean, I’m content if we stay where we were a month ago. That would be okay, if it’s just us watching Batman too much, and horror films on Friday’s, I’m okay with that. I don’t need the rest and the works, I just want... I don’t know, I want him to not be with someone.”

“So you’re saying that you don’t even care what kind of relationship it is as long as it’s with Frank,” Pete summarizes.

“Basically. I just really want to be with Frank. I don’t care how. I mean, I thought that that was all I wanted for forever. I thought I just wanted to have a best friend who I play video games with and throw noodles at when we’re cooking, I thought that’s what I wanted. It never really occurred to me that a relationship entails those things too. I don’t want him to be with anyone else. I don’t want Frank to throw noodles at someone else, I just want him to be with me,” Gerard says.

“But why now?” Patrick says sounding disparaging, “why do you have to be in love with him _now_? He’s with Aaron!”

“I didn’t know I wanted him!” Gerard repeats, and he’s getting really tired of having to say this, “I thought he was my best friend. I thought was it, and that’s all it ever was. I never knew he was the person who I wanted to wake up to every morning. I thought that he was just Frank. And then I picture my life without him and I don’t want to live that life. I don’t want to suffer that torture. I picture Frank waking up next to someone else and it kills me. It feels like someone is pulling my heart out. I can’t live in a world where Frank is happier off with someone else than he is with me. I want to be the one to make him happy. Happier than anyone can ever possibly make him.”

“But you realize that you can’t have him right now,” Patrick says, “because you missed your shot.

“But that doesn’t mean I don’t want him. It’s all been coming at me like a cannon over the last few hours. It’s like five years of lusting over Frank is hitting me all at once in full force. It fucking hurts! Loving him hurts. I don’t get it. I thought that love was supposed to be this warm, pacifying thing, but it’s not! It’s not. It was always supposed to be. You watch enough movies and you just see so many different portrayals of people in love, and it never occurred to me that that wasn’t what it was. It’s the most fucking painful thing in the world, so why do we all chase after this dumb thing? Why do we chase after something that stupid? I love him, I love Frank, and it’s ruining my life.”

“That’s the thing that adults never tell you is that everything is fake. Almost everything is artificial nowadays. Love stinks,” Patrick says.

“Well then why do people want it? Why do so many people spend their whole life searching for this dumb fucking thing when they could be playing Portal 2? What’s the point?”

“That’s a good question. A lot of it is mostly just hating each other, but wondering how you survived without them before you met,” Pete says.

“So there’s no way to make this hurt go away? I don’t want to like Frank, I really don’t,” Gerard says shaking his head and he lets it fall into his hand. His tangled mess of a mop of hair offers a welcome distraction to the fact that he’s crying into his palms. His hair looks like a meticulously detailed enchanted forest from a creepy hand drawn old animated movie.

“I’ve heard the cure for this is ice cream,” Pete options.

“Ice cream is not some magical cure for a broken heart. It’s like an ice pack on a burn. The burn is still going to hurt when you take the ice pack off,” Patrick says, shaking his head at Pete.

“Well I’m trying to lighten the situation. Gerard is sad.”

“Gerard is pathetic and heartbroken,” Gerard says.

“Gerard is talking in third person, which is greatly confusing Pete,” Pete says.

About two hours later the only antidote that they can actually come up with is a marathon of the classic Scooby Doo show on Cartoon Network. Though Pete is still a child at heart and keeps spoiling the ends of the episodes.

“It’s the bank president, I’m sure of it,” Pete says.

“Dude, we have all seen this one, just shut up,” Patrick replies, elbowing him in the ribs.

“Well Jeepers, someone’s a bit testy.”

“I don’t know why I even hang out with you anymore,” Patrick shakes his head like he’s regretting his life decisions.

“It’s because you live in my apartment and eat all my food,” Pete says.

“ _Our_ apartment,” he corrects.

“Well it was mine first.”

“This is love? This is what everyone slits their throat over?” Gerard asks.

“Well I told you that it was about hating each other,” Pete says. “And besides, it’s not like he actually hates me.”

“No I do. I actually hate you,” Patrick says.

“Go fuck yourself,” Pete says, “but anyway, we don’t actually hate each other. I mean a little bit, but that’s part of the fun.”

“Except for when Pete almost burns down the apartment building. That’s not fun,” Patrick says.

“I’m never going to live that one down as long as I live,” Pete shakes his head.

“You started a fire with a hair dryer, Pete,” Patrick reminds him.

“I also _put out_ the fire. I never get credit for that part. You only noticed my mistake, not the solution. I’ve used plenty of hair dryers without starting fires, thank you very much. It was just once!”

“But you started a fire with a hair dryer,” Gerard says.

“Oh c’mon, you kidding me? Even the guy with a broken heart has the nerve to make fun of me! I should just move to Idaho where no one knows about my blunders.”

“Why Idaho?”

“Because I hear they have good potatoes, and I like potatoes,” Pete responds.

“We have potatoes here,” Patrick states, “you can even buy potatoes that were imported _from_ Idaho.”

“Yeah but here people make fun of me for misusing a hairdryer, and reference that Stephen King novel at me.”

“Firestarter?”

“No Cujo,” Pete replies sarcastically, “yes dumbass.”

“Can we discuss the literary history of Stephen King some other time?” Gerard asks.

“Why? Is that invigorating chase scene through a barn more important to you than the many books of one of the greatest contemporary authors?” Pete asks as Shaggy gets his head stuck in a bail of hay.

“I’d say Gaiman, but whatever,” Patrick says.

“An argument could be made for him as well,” Pete nods.

“Please,” Gerard scoffs, “Gaiman is better.”

“Why can’t we just say they’re both good, and get back to the man in a mask with an outlandishly pedophilic name?” Patrick says.

“’The Creeper’ does sound like he wants to feel up little boys and girls doesn’t it?” Pete agrees.

“Where is Frank?” Gerard asks apropos of nothing. “He should be home by now, it’s getting late.”

“Oh he’s probably just... never mind,” Pete says, and then looks over to Patrick who seems just as disarmed by the question as he is.

“What do you mean by that?” Gerard asks, and he pulls his head out from under his blanket to stare at them both with so much innocence it physically pains them both. He looks like a little kid who lost his dad in a mall, and the last thing anyone would ever want to do is give him bad news.

“Gerard, it’s nothing,” Patrick says, because it’s really only speculation. They don’t actually know if Frank’s having sex or anything so it’s absolutely possible that he’s just late coming home. Although Frank was in kind of a nervous mood, and he’ll literally do anything to stop his feelings for Gerard, so now it’s almost more likely than ever that he’d throw himself at Aaron. He’d do that just to test out whether that helps him get over Gerard. They neglect to mention that to Gerard though because he’d probably start balling even more tears.

“What do you mean it’s nothing?” Gerard asks, with his pupils trembling like he already knows the answer. He’s breaking both of their hearts too, and it’s getting a little unnerving how good Gerard is at making people empathize with him. He’d probably convince a guy who just won the lottery that it’s the worst thing to ever happen to him, just by frowning a little bit.

“It’s seriously nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

“Why would I worry? You’re making me worry! What’s going on?” Gerard asks.

“We don’t even know for sure, it’s probably nothing,” Patrick says.

“Well then tell me, because if it’s ‘probably nothing’ than I can’t be upset about it right now.”

“Well no, because the world’s probably not going to end tomorrow, but now that I’ve brought it up you might worry,” Pete says. “This is probably nothing, but there’s always a possibility.”

“What’s going on with Frank? Is he going to blow up earth or something? If not, I want to know!” Gerard says, “Actually I want to know if he is planning to blow up the world too, because I feel like that’s something I should be informed about.”

“Well Gerard you’re not going to like what we have to say, so it’s better if you don’t know at all. Ignorance is bliss.”

“No it’s not!” Gerard complains. He makes one last fleeting attempt at a puppy dog face before his head falls into his hands again, and he starts whimpering.

“Gerard?”

“He’s having sex isn’t he?” Gerard snivels.

“That’s not a guarantee,” Pete says, trying to find some way, _any_ way to make it seem better than it is.

Gerard lifts his head up from his hands, looks around the room with an apparently calm face and then sighs. He looks pretty much unruffled for the most part, but also like he’s trying not to scream.

“Well then,” Gerard squeaks, but his voice sounds strained and high, “if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to crawl into my bed and cry for twenty years.”

With that, Gerard stands up, with as much composure as a man could have given the situation. He then walks over to his room, dragging his duvet behind him in a trail that makes a soft sound against the carpet. The door to his room closes, and there’s a thumping sound followed by Gerard cursing, and then a wailing sound like he’s being murdered slowly and painfully.

“Well that did not go well,” Pete says.

“I cannot even begin to describe how important it is to have someone in your life who states the obvious as much as you do, Pete,” Patrick replies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment?


	17. Frank Didn't Do It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where Frank loves Gerard, and Gerard loves Frank, but Aaron is in the way.

Is it a walk of shame if you’re a boy, and it wasn’t a one-night stand? Is it a walk of shame if you didn’t even have sex? Is it a walk of shame if you ran away before the other person even woke up?

Frank wonders through all the things it could be, and settles that he doesn’t know the answer. He’s got the right posture for it to be a walk of shame, the same guilty feeling in his gut, and the same feeling of disgust.

He thought he could do it. Frank honestly thought that he could just _do it_. It’s a mindless thing, he thought he’d be able to do it. 

He couldn’t.

Frank had thought that having sex with Aaron would help him get over Gerard, but it’s not going to help any if he can’t even go through with it. He tried, honestly he tried. It’s not like Frank necessarily wanted to have sex because he _wanted_ to, he wanted to have sex because he wanted to prove to himself that he wasn’t in love with Gerard.

He got so far as Aaron’s bedroom until he just collapsed and realized what he was doing. He felt like a whore. He felt like scum. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t do the follow through. Frank’s mind is stuck on how close he was. He was though. He was so close, but he didn’t do it.

It’s like when you have to take really gross medicine and you hesitate before you do it. Then you look back on it a minute later, and you sigh because it’s over and done with. Frank didn’t do it though. He couldn’t. He was so close, he’d practically done it, but at the last moment he pulled away. He regrets pulling away. Mostly he regrets that he didn’t even find out if he could get rid of those feelings for Gerard. He didn’t even take the risk to see if it would have helped.

He would have regretted that so much more though, and looking back on it, he knows that. He knows that he would have felt infinitely worse had he gone through with sleeping with Aaron, but that doesn’t ease the feeling in his gut now. Frank would have felt worse, true, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he feels awful now.

What would Gerard think of him if he knew that Frank chickened out? He’s too nice to laugh at him, but he’d probably still find it funny. If Gerard knew that Frank couldn’t sleep with someone _because_ that someone wasn’t Gerard, he’d probably hate Frank and laugh at him. Frank is his best friend, but that’s what makes it so wrong. It’s so wrong to be in love with someone who can’t love you back, because they don’t see you.

Frank’s a ghost, and Gerard is a nonbeliever. He’ll never look twice at Frank, because he doesn’t think there can be anything there. Frank’s lost in this hell of watching Gerard go through his life without noticing, and Gerard’s unaware of the way he hurts Frank. Gerard has no idea that Frank’s cried himself to sleep over the thought that he can’t have him. Gerard has no idea that Frank’s planned out their wedding ceremony to the tiniest detail, millions of times. Gerard has no idea that Frank sometimes steals his sweatshirts just to smell Gerard on them.

Of course Aaron had to be perfect about all of it. He had to be understanding, and sweet, and make Frank feel even worse about the fact that he’s not in love with him. He wants to be. Frank really does, more than anything. He wants to be in love with Aaron. He wants to love the sweet guy who can give him everything he ever wants. Plus it doesn’t hurt that he’s attractive and rich. He’s nice though. He’s good. Frank wants to love him.

Some stupid part of him wants Aaron a lot. So much it hurts. But more of him wants Gerard.

That’s the hardest thing about it. He’s splitting himself too much. He _does_ like Aaron. He likes the guy a lot, but even that feeling can’t compare to Gerard. It’s kind of like Benedict Cumberbatch as Khan in the Star Trek movie. He was good and all, but he wasn’t Ricardo Montalban. Gerard’s the original, and Frank likes him better. He’s actually in love with Gerard, Aaron is nothing more than a sweet guy who likes Frank.

He’d run away from the responsibility of being there when Aaron woke up. He couldn’t do that. He couldn’t look at the guy who’d just woken up, and he couldn’t stand the idea of looking at Aaron knowing he’s not Gerard. So he stood up and ran out. At least he left a note.

If the fact that Aaron was a decent human being and didn’t pressure Frank wasn’t enough the fact that he let Frank stay over so that he didn’t have to face his friends, will prove his qualities. He snuck away from a guy who was so nice about it. The guy really is an angel, and Frank is so lucky, but it doesn’t quite compute in his head.

He’d honestly rather spend an hour with Gerard just holding his hand then a lifetime with Aaron giving him everything he’s ever wanted. It’s not everything he’s ever wanted if it’s coming from the wrong person.

Frank has all these thoughts as he walks down the sidewalk in his, decidedly, worse than a walk of shame walk. He’s pretty miserable for a guy that didn’t do anything. Literally, he didn’t do anything, and that’s most of the reason for why he’s so upset.

Frank walks up the steps into his building slowly, almost forgetting his own way to his apartment. His brain is fuzzy, and he really needs some ibuprofen, but he just wants to make it to his own room. He wants to make it to his own apartment, and rest his head against the wall knowing that just on the other side of the tissue paper thin walls is the guy he loves more than anyone. 

He doubts he can hear Gerard breathe, the walls are thin, but not _that_ thin. Sometimes he can hear Gerard talking in his sleep, but luckily he’s not a snorer. He does drool though. It’s kind of cute, especially in Frank’s eyes.

His feet drag against the ugly moth-eaten carpet that lines the halls. Frank recognizes this carpet as the same pattern his old neighbor used for her tea cosies. Though those were much more impressive considering the little old lady knitted them herself. This rug just looks like it was on the clearance rack at a warehouse store. Maybe Frank is just too critical. He lets his feet walk him to his door, and watches them carry him across the floor.

There’s a muttering at the door next to his own, and then some scratching, followed by, “budge over, Frank’s home!”

Frank rolls his eyes, opens the door to his apartment, and then holds it open for the two nosy neighbors to enter before him. Pete smiles his thanks as he walks past Frank, and Patrick looks at Frank with a strange expression between apprehension and fear.

“So how long were you two at the peephole?” Frank asks. He checks the time on the oven clock. It says that it’s only 7:30, which is way too early for them to be awake on a weekend.

“Only a few minutes,” Pete says trying to defend himself, rather unsuccessfully.

“Well yeah, but before that, Pete had been looking out the window religiously. He even made me watch the window when he had to pee.”

“The world likes its share of irony, okay? If I had let the window go unwatched while pissing, then Frank would have gotten home right about then,” Pete says. Patrick rolls his eyes, and looks at Pete like he doesn’t understand why he’s even there.

“So how did it go?” Pete asks, looking a little less excited than he had a minute ago. He doesn’t like knowing something that Frank doesn’t, and not being able to tell him. It’s so hard for him, because he knows Gerard likes Frank, and that Frank likes Gerard, but stupid Aaron is in the way. If Aaron were gone and Pete had this information still, he wouldn’t even have to think about it. He’d tell Frank so fast that Frank probably wouldn’t understand him, because the words would be too quick.

“What do you mean?” Frank asks. His headache seriously is starting to pound into his head, and he’s seeing rainbows in his eyes from his blurry vision.

“Well you went out yesterday, and are only now coming back...”

“Oh yeah, about that-”

“Is Frank home?” A voice interrupts, and Gerard pops himself out of his room like a bullet. Frank barely even registers him walking into the room. Gerard looks a wreck. His hair would give a stylist a heart attack, followed by an aneurism, followed by a stroke, followed by another heart attack. 

Seeing Gerard such a mess really does confirm Frank’s suspicion that he’s sick. Little does he know that Gerard is sick over Frank. He’s wearing that withered Ramones shirt that someone needs to put out of its misery, and a vaguely jaundiced complexion. Honestly, someone should get the guy a bucket incase his stomach decides to screw him over, which doesn’t seem unlikely given the state of him.

“Oh god you don’t look good, Gerard,” Frank says.

Pete is literally biting his tongue down, because he is quite literally looking at two people who are in love with each other, but neither of them knows it. This must be the worst spot to be as a friend. He wants to just tell them to fucking get together. He kind of wants them to start making out, and it’s killing him that Patrick will kill him if he says anything.

The way Frank is looking at Gerard though is breaking Pete’s heart. It’s even worse for Gerard. Frank’s had five years to get used to being in love with Gerard, he’s learned how to handle it, and keep it below the surface. Gerard though, this is all new to him. He’s in love with this guy that he’s known for so long, and he thought that they were just friends. Five years of loving the guy is all hitting Gerard at once. He’s not doing very well, he’s made himself physically ill just from the stress of the situation.

“It’s nothing,” Gerard waves off Frank’s concern. “W-what happened last night then?”

Gerard tries to put a teasing expression on his face, the kind he’d normally give Frank if this had happened, but it feels fake, so he casts it away. It makes him look even sicker than he had looked a minute ago, but the frown is there to stay.

“What? Oh, uh,” Frank panics, because it’s so demeaning to admit that he chickened out. He’s a coward, and he feels bad about being such a prude. They’re all looking at him waiting for his answer to what happened, and they all think they know, but the real reason is the exact opposite of what they’re thinking. 

Frank knows that they won’t care as well, which makes him hate himself for being so nervous. He knows they’d just be like ‘oh it’s okay Frank, you don’t owe anyone anything’ and he fucking knows that, but his pride has taken such a beating over the years. He can’t stand yet another reason for Pete and Patrick to tease him about being in love with Gerard. Frank didn’t owe Aaron anything for having changed his mind, but he feels so stupid about it all. 

Gerard is oblivious to the real reason, but the other two know. They’ll know that Frank is still so caught up on Gerard. They’ll just pity him. He’ll get that sympathetic little head nod, and he’ll just feel worse about everything. He’s already so hopeless, and he’ll just be proving that even more.

“It was... I mean, what do you expect? We... it was, I mean we... he was nice,” Frank says, vaguely enough that he’s not technically lying.

Gerard feels himself get shot in the heart, and it literally hurts so much that he has to look down to make sure that he hasn’t _actually_ been shot. It feels that way. He’s fairly sure a gunshot, bomb, or being run over by a car couldn’t possibly compare to knowing that Frank slept with someone. _Aaron_ of all people. He’s too perfect. Aaron is perfect, and he’s better for Frank than Gerard ever possibly could be, but Gerard’s selfish. He likes Frank, and Aaron is the competition. Gerard got a late start though, and now Aaron is going to win.

“So it was good?” Patrick asks, “Then why are you home so early?”

“I just... wanted to take a shower?” Frank says, trying to fix the tone of his words to sound more like a statement than a question.

“And Aaron, the millionaire, didn’t have a working shower?” Patrick asks skeptically. Part of him doesn’t believe Frank. A suspicion that is apparently not shared by neither Gerard nor Pete.

“Well, I mean, you know how it is using someone else’s shower,” Frank shrugs, “I like mine. Speaking of showering.”

Frank makes a gesture like he’s going to say more, but he doesn’t trust his own tongue, so he just puts his head down, and walks over to the bathroom. The kitchen stays quiet for a few minutes, with no one saying anything to anyone. They don’t even seem to be breathing at all until the sound of the shower starts, and fills the room with a quiet sound.

“Well-” Pete starts.

Gerard interrupts him before he says anything else, “Save it. I’ll be in my room.”

“Gerard!” Patrick calls after him, but he ignores them both, and just slams his door.

“Well-” Pete starts again.

“Don’t even say it, Pete.”

“Never mind then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I promoted my [Tumblr](http://helenamayhathaway.tumblr.com) on another fic a while ago, but I thought I’d leave it again in case some of you weren’t aware of it, because I post whenever I update. I use this blog for my fics specifically, and some other stuff, but not as much. And also please, for god’s sake, don’t be afraid to talk to me! I like getting messages from you guys! Please? No? I’ll let myself out.


	18. Gerard is Ruining Frank's Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This might sting a little bit.

Patrick’s been watching Frank skeptically for about a week. He just doesn’t buy it. He knows Frank too well. Frank doesn’t strike him as the kind of guy who’d have sex with someone to prove a point. He might kiss a guy or hold someone’s hand, but sex is taking it a bit too far. That’s verging on psychotic.

“So that thing with Aaron last week...”

“Uh what about it?” Frank asks, looking petrified. He’s terrified that someone is going to find out he kind of lied, and he’ll be thrown into the situation where he’ll have to tell Gerard why he couldn’t go through with it. The last thing Frank wants is to have to tell his best friend in the world that he’s been in love with him for five years. That’s a hard confession to even hypothesize let alone have to actually say it.

“Are you sure that’s what actually happened?” Patrick asks. Frank looks around the room to make sure no one is there, but he doesn’t know why he makes the double check. He’s in Patrick’s apartment for god’s sake, and Pete isn’t home. He’s being too paranoid, and even Frank can see that.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, listen, I’m not going to tell anyone what you tell me. I don’t think you slept with Aaron, because I don’t think you’re over Gerard enough to do that,” Patrick says, “and if you tell me that you didn’t sleep with him, then it’ll stay in confidence, but I want to know why you lied.”

“I... I didn’t lie,” Frank replies, “I just didn’t tell the whole truth.”

“You’re stealing lines from generic TV scripts, Frank. Either you slept with Aaron or you didn’t, and that’s a matter of fact.”

“Alright fine. I didn’t. I couldn’t. I thought of Gerard, and I imagined kissing Gerard when I was kissing Aaron and I couldn’t do that to Aaron. I’d be using him, and besides, I’m not at that place yet. I’m not emotionally ready to give up my feelings for Gerard. I still think I might be on my way there, because I do really like Aaron, but I don’t think that’s going to happen. At least not yet. I think it’s going to be a while before I’m ready to really walk away from those feelings, so yeah, I lied. I lied because I didn’t want you two to give me that knowing look, alright? I’m sick of being the pity case. Every time you or Pete bring up my feelings for Gerard, you look at me like I’m this little kid, and I’m sick of it,” Frank confesses.

“You could’ve said that. I mean, in private, not with Gerard there. You could have said that though,” Patrick replies. He hadn’t realized he’d been giving Frank any sympathetic faces like that, but now that he looks back on it, it doesn’t surprise him in the slightest. He never knew it bothered Frank though.

“What would you have said?” Frank asks, “Do you have any idea, any fucking idea, how painful it is to know that everyone around you pities you? It is literally the worst feeling I’ve ever felt, and I can’t do anything about it, because I fucking deserve it. I’m literally so hopeless and everyone sees that, but I can’t do a goddamn thing about it. You all make jokes, and like to laugh it off, because, hey isn’t it just the funniest thing in the world that Frank has a crush on his roommate, it’s just a real riot, right? But I fucking crawl into my bed every night and I have to remember that everyone thinks I’m just this funny little zoo animal. It’s funny to think about me as nothing more than this hormonal idiot who’s in love with someone who doesn’t even like him back. I’m this laughing stock! It hurts so much, because I understand that it’s funny on the outside, but in the inside, being me, being so in love with Gerard that it physically hurts... that’s not funny. That is literally like being burned alive every motherfucking day of my life, and I have to pretend that it doesn’t hurt me more than anything in the world. I have to sit there and laugh along with you, or Pete, or Mikey, or my coworkers saying something like ‘isn’t it funny how Frank has this undying love for someone who doesn’t love him back,’ and I have to laugh because if I don’t then I’ll lose my mind.”

“Frank, I’m sorry-”

“And I _am_ losing my mind. Every day it’s getting harder and harder not to just let myself give in and collapse on myself, but I can’t do that, because than I lose him. I’m this building made out of plaster and beams, and if I let the beams give in, than everything comes tumbling down. I have the weight of the world on my shoulders trying to keep myself from having a mental break over Gerard. I can’t lose him though. I’m in love with him, but losing him would be even worse than getting to be his best friend, because at least this way, this way I get to see him. I get to make him laugh, and I get to watch movies with him, and it kills me, but it’s better than not having him there at all. 

“But you guys don’t see that. You don’t see me straining to keep myself afloat, you see a stupid hopeless romantic ogling at his roommate, and wanting to get in his pants, but that’s not who I am. I just want him to once, just once, to fucking hold me and tell me that he loves me, but I don’t get that. I’m never going to get that, even though it’s all I want. I’m suffocating, I don’t have a life raft, and I’ve just been trying not to drown for so many years. Then there’s you guys, my fucking _friends_ , you’re my neighbors! You and Pete, as well as the love of my life’s _brother_ , are there every now and again to come hold my head underwater to make it worse. Adding insult to injury, and not even noticing how cruel you fucking are. You make these offhanded remarks that I’m supposed to put up with because it’s all in good fun, and you’re not being serious, but it’s a kick in the fucking stomach. And then you paddle away because at least you have a boat to keep you going, but I don’t. I’ve been in the middle of an endless ocean for so long doing a fucking doggy paddle, and I still don’t have him. Still keeping my head barely above water, and I’ll never have him. All I want in the entire world, and he doesn’t even know I’m here. Gerard is ruining my life, and I never get to have him.”

“Frank, I didn’t know it was that hard,” Patrick says frowning.

“No you didn’t,” Frank replies, “Because you’re in a happy relationship, and it never occurred to you that not all of us have it so lucky. You get to be with the guy you’re in love with. You get to watch movies with him, and burn food together, and sleep next to him at night knowing that he loves you and you love him back, but I don’t fucking have that. I have to watch Gerard when we’re watching movies and picture what it would be like to be wrapped in his arms. I have to watch him try to flip a fucking pancake unsuccessfully, and I don’t get to tease him and tell him I love that he burned half of it. I don’t get to wake up next to the one person in the entire world who I want to. I don’t get to smell his nasty morning breath or feel his arms around me when we cuddle. I don’t get any of that, and that’s all I want, because I don’t care about the other shit, I just want... I want Gerard to hug me the way people do when they remember how lucky they are to have found each other. The ‘squeeze the life out of you hug.’ I just want that. That’s it. It’s not even anything, but that’s it. But you and Pete have that, and it never crosses your mind that I don’t. I don’t even kind of have that.”

“You do have Aaron,” Patrick suggests.

“Aaron’s not Gerard. He may like me, but that doesn’t change who he is, and no matter how hard I try, I’m never going to stop loving Gerard. Never. I can’t and I don’t even remember why I wanted to. I know that I can’t have him, because my life is literally horse shit, but does anyone fucking care other than to make fun of me? No. In a lot of ways, I’m defined by Gerard, and I don’t want to be. I don’t want to be the guy dependent upon him, but I am, and fuck it, if that’s who I’m going to be than fine. I don’t want to be with Aaron, but maybe if I give it time, I’ll love him. Maybe it’ll happen. That’s all I have though, Patrick. All I have right now is the hope that maybe someday I won’t be in love with Gerard. I don’t have any hope for him loving me back, so this is it. I have to hope, and pray, and fucking plead for this feeling to go away, but I don’t think it’s going to fucking die. I’m in love with him, and if I don’t hope that that goes away someday then I can’t even wake up in the morning. It’s stupid as well because I’m not an idiot, it’ll always be there, but we all have to hope for a miracle every once in a while.”

“Frank, there’s something I think you ought to know,” Patrick says, because he feels as if he has no choice other than to tell him. Frank’s got himself so down, and as much as Patrick hates meddling in other people’s lives, he also sees this as an opportunity. Frank may be with Aaron but that doesn’t mean he’s in love with him. He’s far from in love with Aaron. Aaron might be in the way, but that doesn’t mean he’s not in love with Gerard. Frank is miserable, Patrick doesn’t want Frank to be miserable. By god, if Frank is going to be in love with Gerard, than he should know that Gerard loves him back.

“What? I’m a fucking dumbass?” Frank suggests.

“No!” Patrick assures, “That’s not it. It’s about Gerard.”

“Yeah, the guy I’m in love with. Of course it’s about him. It always is,” Frank says.

“Well there’s something I know about him that you don’t,” Patrick says.

“Doubt it. I know everything about him,” Frank replies putting his head down, the way he always does whenever he’s talking about Gerard.

“Well this is one thing you don’t know.”

Frank’s eyes narrow at Patrick like he’s very sure that Patrick is wrong. There’s literally nothing Patrick could know about Gerard that Frank wouldn’t know first. Frank knows what kind of toothpaste the guy uses. He knows the name of Gerard’s second grade teacher, and sixth grade locker combination.

“See, okay, the other day,” Patrick starts, trying to figure out how he can say this, “the other day, last week, when Gerard was sick-”

“He still is sick,” Frank points out, because Gerard’s been practically bedridden for a week. Gerard’s had to call in sick for work the past week.

“Well yeah, but when he first got sick, I talked to him. He’s sort of got this problem that stressed him out so much it gave him a physical illness. He’s worried himself into that fever,” Patrick says.

“Alright?” Frank says, because he knows that’s possible, but what on earth could have happened in Gerard’s life that would have caused that?

“And see, the thing is that I shouldn’t be telling you this. I shouldn’t because I was entrusted with his secret, but it’s ruining the both of you, and the last thing I want is for you two to drive yourselves insane, so I’m going to come out and be totally honest with you, Frank. Gerard’s in love with you.”

Frank freezes for a long moment, and just kind of looks at the counter without thinking or saying anything. Patrick’s heart races in his chest, so fast that he could probably fuel a rocket. He’s waiting for Frank to do something, but this isn’t exactly the reaction he was expecting. He assumed a bombshell like that one would have induced at least something.

“Wow,” Frank replies finally.

“I know,” Patrick says, feeling relieved. He really shouldn’t have said that, not according to his basic principles, but it had to be done. He’s not a natural born gossip, but the fact that the two of them loved each other made it feel like Patrick owed them.

“I can’t believe it,” Frank says, looking at Patrick with an unreadable expression.

“I thought you should know because-”

“I can’t believe you thought it was okay to make fun of me like that,” Frank finishes, and Patrick’s face crashes like a wave. That had not been the reaction he was expecting.

“Frank, that’s not what I was saying!”

“No, you just thought it was funny to joke about my feelings for Gerard,” Frank says, picking himself up from the stool at the counter. 

“You are completely misinterpreting what I said,” Patrick replies, “I didn’t mean it as a joke, I was being literal.”

“Yeah right,” Frank says, grabbing at the door to the apartment. Frank is avid at dramatic exits, and they’re one thing that he enjoys even when the situation is as unfortunate as this one is.

“Frank, what will it take for me to convince you that I’m being honest?” Patrick calls out at him before Frank slams the door.

“A concussion,” Frank replies, because that’s the only state you can get him where he’ll ever be that gullible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahahahaha. If you think this chapter was heartbreaking, you’re going to really hate me for the next one.


	19. Gerard REALLY Hates Aaron

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know a chapter is sad when the author cried while writing it.

Frank had known that eventually, the mulish behaviors of Pete and Gerard would win out in the end. After Patrick and Frank’s little spat, they haven’t really talked to each other. Actually, Patrick has talked _at_ Frank and Frank’s been ignoring him. He spilled his heart out to Patrick, and Patrick made fun of him. _Patrick_ of all people. The most polite human on the planet. The guy who apologizes to walls for stubbing his toe on them, the guy who says sorry for saying sorry too much.

Frank’s sure he had to have been lying. It goes against all odds in the universe that Gerard would or could ever be in love with him. To put it simply, Frank’s at the point where he doesn’t believe Gerard even can love someone. He’s a good person, and he can have friends, but Gerard can never really be in love. Not to the extent that Frank can be in love.

Pete is a stubborn little man though, and Gerard might even be more stubborn. Apparently it’s too early in Frank’s relationship for either of them to introduce the parents, but who’s more important than parents? Friends.

They’ve decided that at long last, Frank is going to bring Aaron home to meet the people who will be a million times more critical about him than Frank’s own parents. Frank would rather introduce Aaron to King Henry VIII. At least in meeting the deceased monarch, Frank would have the chance of being beheaded before suffering through the ultimate form of embarrassment.

Probably the first thing that Frank’s worried about that’s going to make his stomach fall out of his body, is the fact that his apartment doesn’t have a real table. They usually don’t celebrate Thanksgiving and whatnot with fancy food, because two of the four people participating in the meal are vegetarians. At the very least Frank and Patrick have compatible taste buds. They never really have to worry about seating though, because the couch is big enough for three peoplem, and whoever the last person is just pulls up one of the collapsible lawn chairs they keep in the closet by the bathroom.

Issue number two is the fact that all of Frank’s friends are complete psychopaths. Gerard never shuts up about superheroes, Patrick is always talking about the artist formerly known as Prince, and Pete is Pete. Frank’s being a little judgmental though. Sometimes Gerard talks about Star Wars. It doesn’t always have to be superheroes. It usually is though.

Problem number three is that there’s a certain amount of tension within the group, let alone in Frank and Aaron’s relationship. Aaron understood, but there’s a bit of a divide between them ever since Frank ran away a few weeks ago. Patrick and Frank aren’t really on speaking terms, Gerard’s been avoiding Frank at all cost, and Pete will talk to anyone who will listen to him. Some things never change. Though Patrick’s been kind of distant with Pete because Frank hasn’t been talking to him, which has made Pete feel like Patrick is mad at him which means that... basically, everything is just really tense.

To make it worse though Mikey has invited himself to the really dysfunctional get-together. Apparently he’s still in disbelief that Frank has a boyfriend, or maybe he’s just going to give Gerard moral support. Patrick’s also coming even though Frank would really rather him not, because neither of them wants to explain why they’re not getting along at the moment. They’re trying to pretend they didn’t have a dispute. 

Frank’s just trying to make his feelings for Gerard go away the best he can. The fact that Gerard’s been partially avoiding him is not helping. Gerard’s pulled himself together a little bit, but not by much. He’s able to function well enough to make it to his job, but he’s not performing well. Frank’s broken three plates in the last two weeks at his job, but luckily none of them had food on them. 

Really everything in the world is coming together all at once to make sure, with absolute certainty, that everything goes disastrously wrong.

There’s a crappy folding poker table that was the best thing they could find in the storage unit in the basement. It’s going to be used as a makeshift dining table. Technically it belonged to the previous tenants of Frank and Gerard’s apartment, but they left it behind, so they decide it’s okay to use. Gerard and Pete had to drag it up to their apartment because Frank was afraid that there might be spiders down there. Oddly enough, Gerard found it endearing. Pete, however, did not.

They then improvised, and gathered themselves six chairs, some from the basement, some for Pete and Patrick’s apartment, and some of the lawn chairs that they had already. It’s the most depressing looking dining room in the world, splayed out right next to the kitchen counter, but at least it’s there at all.

Patrick is tapping his foot against the floor, and that’s the only sound in the entire room. Frank’s got one hand on his knee thrumming against his jeans in want of something else to do. Gerard’s sitting on the couch staring at the TV, which is off for the first time since he’d bought the apartment. The TV is the white noise that the room direly needs, but no one is making any move to turn it on, for fear of pissing someone else off. Pete’s staring from one person to the next, trying to figure out why everyone looks so tense, and he’s failing miserably at coming up with the reason.

They’re all waiting for whomever shows up first, Mikey or Aaron. It’s the first time they’ve all been in the same room in over a week. Not only is the mutual crush Frank and Gerard have for each other, driving the two of them apart, it’s driving all of them apart. It’s kind of scary to think of how they might be losing each other. It’s like season ten of Friends where you know they’re all going to be going their separate ways soon, and are afraid to think about it. Or like senior year of high school. Except by all means, they shouldn’t be leaving each other anytime soon, but it feels like that.

Frank knows with no amount of uncertainty that his relationship is moving too slowly. It’s going at a snail’s pace. They’ve been dating for very nearly two months, and Frank hasn’t had the courage to sleep with his boyfriend yet. They should have hit at least some variety of milestone, but they haven’t. Frank’s nervous he’s going to deter Aaron if he keeps this up.

After quite possibly the most painful fifteen minutes of silence that any human has ever had to endure ever, let alone four, there’s a knock at the door. The knock on the door is then followed by someone messing around with the doorknob, and then Mikey letting himself in when he realizes the door is unlocked.

“Fuck, who died?” Mikey asks as greeting when he sees the four people who are way too quiet.

“Your sense of humor,” Gerard says.

“Don’t be silly,” Mikey scoffs, “I never had one.”

Frank looks up at him, willing him to decrease the awkward levels in the room, but Mikey doesn’t seem to be considering it. Instead, he looks kind of happy at how quiet it is. Frank then remembers that Mikey’s the quiet one in the first place and hits himself for thinking he was even capable of small talk.

“Oh, sorry, I was going to knock, but...” a new voice says and they all look over to see Aaron. Mikey left the door askew though, so he’s just standing there. Frank jumps up, eager to have someone to talk to who he’s not afraid of pissing off so easily as the other three. He could probably have a conversation with Pete without incident, because Pete’s always the neutral party, but it would have been weird to ignore everyone else.

“Hey,” Frank says, walking over to him. Gerard turns away to look at the floor when Frank stands up. The last thing he wants to see is Frank kissing Aaron. His stomach is not in the state where he can witness such a thing without puking.

“Did you even make food?” Mikey whispers to Gerard as the other four start to get ready to eat the food, that doesn’t seem to be there.

“What? You kidding? I can’t cook for shit. We ordered Chinese food.”

“Oh god, are we going to have to wait even longer for that to come?”

“Should be here any minute now,” Gerard says. “Aaron was just really late.”

“Oh god, and so it begins,” Mikey says, as Gerard stands up. If Mikey knows his brother, which of course he does, Aaron is going to be grilled like a steak tonight.

About fifteen minutes later they’re all sitting at the poker table that isn’t big enough, and Aaron has about four sets of eyes on him. Frank and Aaron are on one side of the table, Gerard and Pete are across from them, and then Patrick and Mikey on either of the ends. 

It’s uncomfortable for the longest time until finally Gerard decides to break the ice, but he doesn’t do it very well.

“So Aaron, why were you late?”

“Gerard!” Patrick hisses, “Mikey was late too!”

“Yeah, I was late. I was really late. I was so very late,” Mikey says, trying to diffuse whatever it was that Gerard had just tried to start.

“I just misjudged when to leave, I’m sorry,” Aaron says.

“Oh, because your three thousand dollar watch couldn’t tell you what time it is?” Gerard asks, and Pete’s glad he took the seat next to Gerard, because Patrick wouldn’t have the instinct to kick him hard in the shins. Gerard doesn’t even visibly seem to notice, but he does kick Pete back.

“I’m sorry?” Aaron asks.

“Don’t be,” Frank murmurs to him. He does not understand what that was about. That was a pretty slimy thing for Gerard to have said, and it’s not the kind of thing he’d expect coming from his roommate.

About ten minutes go by without incident, but that’s mostly because Gerard hasn’t said anything at all in the last ten minutes.

“Gerard?” Frank asks, “Are you even listening?”

“To what?” Gerard asks, because in all honesty, he couldn’t care less about whatever riveting tale Aaron was telling.

“Wow,” Frank says, obviously irritated.

“What?” Gerard asks.

“Nothing,” he replies, but it’s obviously not nothing. Now they’ve got the whole table’s attention, and they’re trying not to stir up trouble.

“That’s not nothing.”

“Well whatever, Gerard,” Frank replies. He’s already on edge enough with the fact that his boyfriend is now meeting the love of his life, and now said love of his life is being a dick.

“Whatever to you too, Frank,” Gerard says back. 

Pete kicks him again under the table to get him to shut up, but it doesn’t make Gerard stop talking at all, “would you stop fucking kicking me, Pete?”

“No Pete, kick him again,” Frank says. Pete had been trying to avoid getting people angry with each other, and now he’s staring wide-eyed at Frank, not knowing what to do. He doesn’t want to kick Gerard again, with Gerard looking so vicious, but at the same, Frank’s look could boil water.

“Why’d you say that, Frank?” Gerard asks.

“Because Gerard, you’re acting like a jerk,” Frank says, and the whole room silences even more so than it had been a minute before.

“What was that?” Gerard inquires, looking stunned.

“He didn’t say anything,” Pete tries, but Frank just huffs.

“I said you’re behaving like a jerk,” Frank repeats.

“What did I do?” Gerard asks defensively.

“You don’t have to drill Aaron, okay? This isn’t an interrogation! He’s got more money than you, you don’t need to be a bitch about it.”

“You’re fucking kidding me, right?” Gerard asks, and now they’re both pissed, and Patrick is really regretting the fact that he did not nail down the furniture, because a big storm is heading their way.

“Excuse me?” Frank asks.

“You’re not really a breath of fresh air either, Frank. You’re being a bit of a prick about everything. Nothing is good enough for you today.”

“No? Because you totally messing everything up, sabotaging all of this on purpose, is something I’m supposed to put up with?” Frank scowls.

“Oh yeah, right. Like I would have a reason to sabotage anything,” Gerard says.

“Calm down boys,” Mikey says softly, but it’s not going to do any good. They’re both seconds away from having steam come out of their ears.

“You can’t stand the fact that I missed a few dumb movie nights and now you’re taking it out on Aaron like it’s his fault, Gerard,” Frank accuses.

“Really? That’s what you think I’m upset about? I thought it was just a menial thing, Frank. That’s what you said a month ago, remember? It’s just a movie night, no big deal,” Gerard paraphrases.

“You were totally blowing things out of proportion back then, and you are now. It was just one night,” Frank says.

“Followed by two more Fridays,” Gerard says.

“Like it matters.”

“It does matter! It’s an institution that we built our fucking friendship on, Frank! Do you even care about our friendship anymore? You never hang out with me,” Gerard says.

“You’re like a dog, you’re so pathetic. I’m not glued to you, Gerard. I do have another life that doesn’t need you in it every ten seconds telling me what to do. Besides, I’m not the one who’s been ignoring you for the past two weeks, or have you forgotten? Did you think I didn’t notice or something? Going to your room when I get home, leaving to get groceries when we don’t need them. You know that we have three cartons of eggs, Gerard, and you haven’t made one fucking omelette with a single one of them!”

“I’m the only one who’s been ignoring people, right. Way to be a hypocrite, Frank. Or am I mistaken that you haven’t said one word to Patrick in two weeks?”

“Leave me out of it,” Patrick pipes in, putting his head in his hands.

“That has nothing to do with you,” Frank says.

“No. None of it does. No part of me has anything to fucking do with your life anymore, because you don’t care about me! You don’t care about me, or Patrick, or Pete, you care about your stupid boyfriend who you’ve known for two months instead of your friends. Who are we to you though, right? You’ve only known Pete for like seven years. Only known me for five. Only known Patrick for three. Our fifteen years combined total of friendship can’t hold a flame to his two fucking months,” Gerard says pointing at Aaron, who’s trying not to look up from the table. He’s found that staring at the table is the only way he can keep from making eye contact with anyone.

“That’s how you feel? You feel betrayed by me not hanging out with you? Boo fucking hoo, Gerard. I didn’t know I had an obligation to fulfill your quota of hanging out.”

“How do you not see how messed up that is, Frank? I didn’t spend all this time with you, letting you live in my apartment just so you could ditch me when you found a better offer,” Gerard snaps.

“ _Your_ apartment?”

“Who had the apartment first?” Gerard says.

“Who needs me to pay half the rent?”

“I don’t need you, Frank. I don’t actually need you to help me pay the lease. I can do it by myself. I like having my friend here, but now I never even do, because he’s out with his boyfriend. You’re with him all the time, and you don’t care anymore that I’ve been your friend for five years. You care more about him, which, I’m sorry, is a little fucked up.”

“I’m fucked up?” Frank asks, aggressing further to make everyone fear he’s about to turn into the Incredible Hulk. “I thought friends were supposed to be happy for their friends prospering, or have I been wrong all these years? Now, all of a sudden, now that I have a boyfriend, a real life that doesn’t include you, now I’m fucked up? Shouldn’t you, I don’t know, be _happy_ for me?”

“Happy about that? The fact that I never see you anymore?”

“And whose fault is that?”

“I’m pissed, so what? Even if I did hang around the apartment like normal, you wouldn’t talk to me anymore. You wouldn’t be around any more than if I’m gone. You’d just ignore me, like you have ever since you met Aaron. I don’t matter anymore,” Gerard states once again.

“Is that what you think?” Frank shouts, “That you don’t matter to me anymore?”

“Well duh,” Gerard replies.

“Fine!” Frank shouts, throwing his hands up in the air in disbelief and defeat. “Fine, if that’s what you think, than fine. I don’t care about you, Gerard. I don’t care in the slightest. If that’s what you believe, then so be it.”

The room is filled with the sound of a chair scraping against the floor, and Frank stands up from where he’s sitting. No one says anything, and the only person who’s daring to even breathe is Gerard, because he’s lost a little air from yelling.

“What’re you doing?” Gerard asks, watching Frank scrape his food into the trash.

“It’s obvious that I’m unwanted here, so I’m leaving,” Frank says, and Aaron turns to look at him. It’s the first time anyone besides Gerard has made eye contact with Frank in the last five minutes. Frank gives him a little nod, and slowly, a lot more carefully than Frank had, Aaron stands up. Gerard wants to throw a fork at him like a ninja star and slit his throat, but he refrains because he doesn’t have that much skill. He’d probably end up just annoying the guy who is, granted, a lot bigger than him.

“Frank, you’re not really being so childish,” Gerard says, standing up. He walks over to the counter, but stops before he gets too close, because Frank’s turned a red color. The last thing Gerard wants is to be punched in the face by the guy he’s in love with. Yes, he’s really fucking pissed at Frank right now, but he’s also really crazy for him too.

“If I stay here, I’m going to say something I’ll regret later, and honestly, I don’t want to even look at you right now, Gerard,” Frank says. 

“Frank-”

“Let it go, Gerard,” Mikey says, turning to look at Gerard disparagingly.

Frank sets his jaw and looks at Gerard daringly. Aaron tries not to stand too obviously in the middle of the room, but Patrick and Pete are both staring daggers into him. They both blame Aaron for all this mess after all, because he’s the one getting in the way of the two boys tearing the clothes off each other.

“What do I care,” Gerard finally says. “Go! See if anyone will even notice a difference.”

Frank is about to say something, yell at Gerard, or lunge at him, but he closes his mouth and grits his teeth.

Now usually Frank likes to make a dramatic exit for effect only. It’s for appearances, and nothing else. Right now though, he wants to stab the wall with a knife, or smash a few plates.

He grabs the doorknob instead, struggles with it for a moment because his hands are sweating, and then throws the door open so hard that it bangs against the wall. The noise it makes when it hits the wall is nearly deafening, and the door reverberates back off the wall. Frank is out before it has a chance to catch him though, and Aaron grabs the door before it slams back closed. He follows behind Frank, not looking back, because the scene he’s leaving is not very inviting.

When he closes the door behind him, Gerard sees a small dent in the wall, where the handle hammered into the plaster. Gerard decides to think about it later, put a doorstop or something there, but right now his brain is buzzing.

“I fucking hate him,” Gerard says, banging is fist against the counter. It hurts like a bitch, but he doesn’t even care. Doesn’t notice the throbbing in his hand.

“It’s just a fight. Frank doesn’t actually think that about you,” Pete says.

“Not him,” Gerard says, anger still evident in his voice, “It’s that asshole Aaron.”

“Gerard, you can’t-”

Gerard’s really not in the mood to let other people talk, so he interrupts, “I’m going to talk to him.”

Gerard makes his way over to the door, to the astonishment of the three people in the room, who all give each other sideways looks across the table. None of them even have the time to say anything before Gerard’s exited the apartment.

He makes his way down the hall, trying to calm his anger before he confronts Frank, but it’s not helping. Even his ears feel red hot with anger, so he doesn’t want to imagine how red the rest of his face is.

“Gerard stop,” Aaron says, catching Gerard off guard. He hadn’t seen Aaron standing there in the hall, which is dark enough to hide him in the shadows. Gerard turns to look at him, then walk over, because he’s never had a proper conversation with the guy, and it’s weird to have been directly called out by him. He’ll deal with Frank in a moment, right now he’s curious.

“I just want to talk to Frank. To apologize,” Gerard says.

“Well don’t. I don’t appreciate how much effect you have over Frank.”

“You what?” Gerard asks.

“Just back off from him, okay?” Aaron says.

“Why?”

“He’s my boyfriend,” Aaron says.

“He’s my friend,” Gerard spits back.

“Boyfriend trumps friend.”

“Best friend,” Gerard corrects.

“The song remains the same,” Aaron replies.

“You kidding?” Gerard asks pervasively.

“Just lay off him a little, I don’t like how you seem to take up all his time.”

“ _I_ take up his time? You own a mirror, bro?” Gerard asks, trying to stop himself from kicking this douche in the face.

“I’m not stupid enough to not see how you look at him,” Aaron says, and Gerard’s body turns to lead. If this guy, Frank’s boyfriend, can see how Gerard feels about him, than what must Frank think?

“Fucking dick, I don’t look at him like anything,” Gerard says, his face masking the fear with anger.

“Please, don’t treat me like a child,” Aaron replies.

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Gerard says, “I don’t like how you think you own him or something, okay? He’s not yours to haggle with.”

“No, but who’s his boyfriend in this situation?” Aaron asks coldly, and Gerard literally has to pinch himself to hold back from beating the shit out of him. He wants to be Frank’s boyfriend, not this asshat with a Rolex.

“Go to hell,” Gerard says, before turning around, and down the hall back to his apartment. He forgets about how he’d wanted to talk to Frank until he’s standing right outside his apartment, but by then his pride has taken priority over his need to right what he said. He wants to talk to Frank, but he doesn’t want to face Aaron again.

Really, right now is not the most ideal time in the world for Gerard to have found the ultimate flaw with Aaron. He’s possessive. Aaron’s possessive and maybe a little selfish. He might be generous with his money, but he’s not with Frank.

Gerard wants to puke, because it’s disgusting. He hates thinking that Aaron feels he has some sort of ownership over Frank just because they’re dating.

Then the knowledge that they are dating hits Gerard again, and he opens the door. It’s unlocked, and the three people haven’t moved almost at all since when Gerard left. He’d half expected them to be at the peephole, but it looks as if they recognized the gravity of the situation and decided not to. Mikey’s the only one who’s moved, and he’s tried to clean up some of the dishes.

They all turn to look at Gerard when he enters, and stands there for half a second.

“Gerard, you-”

Gerard raises a hand, silently commanding for no one to speak, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he walks forward, through the kitchen, to the right, and into the bathroom. There’s the sound of retching and then the three of them infer the rest. 

“I think,” Pete says, “that this went so bad, I can’t even try to lighten the mood with a joke.”

“I tried to tell Frank two weeks ago,” Patrick confesses, putting his head down into the space between his arms. “He didn’t believe me, and that’s why he’s been ignoring me. Now’s as good a time as any to say that.”

“This is all so fucked up,” Mikey says, which is a pretty accurate description for the chain of events.

Gerard stumbles out of the bathroom a few minutes later, looking so green it’s actually kind of scary. He’s leaning against the wall for support, and it literally looks like he’s trying not to just collapse from everything and start screaming in pain.

“I-” he starts, but then has trouble finishing his sentence. “I’m not doing too good. I can’t... I can’t even look at him anymore without hating myself.”

“Gerard, if we’d known this was going to happen, we wouldn’t have...” Pete starts, but Gerard begins shaking his head.

“It’s no one’s fault,” he says, thinking silently that it is all Aaron’s fault. Why does he have to be so charming? What as that thing in the hall about? Is he really going to be like that? If so, Gerard’s condition can only get worse. If just thinking about Aaron made him sick, what will happen if it happens again, and again?

“There’s something you might want to know,” Pete starts.

“No Pete,” Patrick interrupts him, and Pete looks back sadly. “He wouldn’t believe you anyway.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I wouldn’t even blame you if you gave me death threats. But hey... at least you have more of a reason to hate Aaron now (or me, probably me)!


	20. Gerard is Miserable (Reprise)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reprise is a great word. People need to use that word more often.

Gerard wakes up covered in sweat. He’s not certain why he bolted up so quickly, but there’s the distinct feeling within him that he’d heard someone screaming. He looks around his room, which isn’t as dark as he’d like it to be. For some reason, the lamp on his bedside table is on.

He pulls himself up and rests his back against the headboard for a long moment before deciding that he’s going to have to get up to pee, or he won’t get back to sleep. There’s a cramp in his leg, which makes him groan when he throws one foot and then the other off the side of the bed. He shakes his head, willing the pain to go away, but it doesn’t. His leg just hurts like a bitch right now, and he has to hope it’ll subside in a few minutes.

The ember numbers of the clock on his bedside table tell him that it’s four in the morning. He has a hard time remembering what happened last night. He recalls puking once or maybe twice. Than Mikey brought him tea, which, when Gerard looks back on it, may have been spiked with a sleeping pill. That may not have been a bad idea, because Gerard had been a pretty huge mess last night. He’d have appreciated knowing he was drinking flavored sleep water, but it’s too late to argue now, because that was several hours ago.

When Gerard stumbles out of his room he sees a form on his couch. His immediate instinct is to guess that it’s Frank, having fallen asleep in front of the TV like he does sometimes on weekends. When that happens, Gerard will turn the TV off and put a few blankets on him to let him sleep. He always looks so precious like that. So innocent compared to his usual boisterous self. That used to just be something Gerard would do because Frank was his best friend, but now as he thinks about it, there was something fairly intimate about it.

Gerard knows however, that the person there isn’t Frank. They’re too boney, not like Frank.

He wonders why Mikey fell asleep on his couch, but decides not to question it, because he really does have to pee.

Mikey’s eyes open as Gerard passes him, but Gerard doesn’t notice it. He turns his head slowly to watch his brother head towards the bathroom, and he lets his head fall back against the armrest of the couch.

Mikey doesn’t have the heart to tell Gerard how he’d been woken up by his screaming. He’d decided, when hearing Gerard rustle around in his room, that just feigning sleep would be the best idea. 

A minute later when Gerard returns Mikey closes his eyes shut again, and waits for Gerard to go back to sleep.

“I know you’re awake, Mikes,” Gerard says.

“I’m not awake.”

“You just talked.”

“I’m a sleep talker,” Mikey replies.

“You’re a sleep conversationalist is what you are.”

“I don’t talk much in the waking hours, I guess this is just to balance things out,” Mikey says.

“Alright for real, Mikey, why are you here?”

“Just wanted to keep an eye on you. That’s all. In case... never mind,” Mikey says.

“In case what?” Gerard asks, “In case I get my hands on some alcohol, and ruin my life even more than I already have?”

“Where did you hear me say that? I did not say that.”

“It was implied,” Gerard replies.

“No it fucking wasn’t, you’re so depressing. And has anyone ever told you that you’re rude as fuck when you’re sad?” Mikey asks.

“Thanks for understanding my emotional plight,” Gerard replies, bitterly.

“Oh god, I’m sorry. I’m being insensitive. Sorry. I didn’t mean to be. I’m just, like, dude, you can’t let Frank ruin your life,” Mikey says pulling himself up from his spot a little bit.

“It’s too late though! It would have been one thing to have realized I had a crush on him five years ago, but it’s a completely different thing to have been in love with him all that time and not even realize it. I can’t do anything about this. I can’t nip it in the bud or anything, that flower has bloomed, Mikey, and there ain’t a thing I can do about it.”

Mikey looks down and frowns. There’s not much he can really say here, because he’ll either run the risk of pissing Gerard off, or saying something that he shouldn’t. Patrick had tried telling Frank that Gerard was in love with him apparently, but he didn’t believe it. Gerard might be the same. Mikey certainly doesn’t want to test him right now, in the middle of the night. He’s not having a good time as it is. Mikey doesn’t want to test those boundaries.

“I’m going back to bed,” Gerard says.

“Yeah, goodnight,” Mikey says, and he frowns.

~*~*~*~

To be honest, Gerard had thought that when Frank ran out of the apartment last week, it would be a one, maybe two day thing, depending on how mad he was. He hasn’t seen Frank in a week though, and he’s losing his mind.

When Frank gets back he doesn’t know what the hell he’s going to do. He kind of wants to punch Frank right in his pretty little face, and he also wants to make out with him, or drape his arms around Frank and not let him go. He still really wants to kill him though.

It feels kind of surreal not seeing Frank for a week now, and every single second of every night has been filled with Gerard just thinking about what he might be doing with Aaron. It’s the worst feeling he’s ever experienced in his entire life, and he wants Frank back. He wants Frank to come home, so that he can yell at him and then hug him.

It’s the ninth day since Frank’s been gone and every time someone is at the door, Gerard still calls out the same thing.

“Frank?” he shouts and pops his head out of his room.

“No, Pete,” Pete says walking into the room. “Still not back yet?”

“No,” Gerard replies shaking his head. He’s pretty much cried out all the tears his body can create, and hasn’t been able to in a few days. Mikey says he’s dehydrated, which would explain the massive panging headache that follows Gerard wherever he goes. He’s not thirsty though, and trying to drink anything, including water, repulses him. He’s basically the definition of miserable. In the next edition of the Merriam Webster dictionary, they will define the word ‘miserable’ with literally just a picture of Gerard’s face.

“I’m sorry,” Pete says.

“When do I admit defeat and rent his room?” Gerard asks.

“Oh c’mon, Gerard. He’ll come back! Give it a few more days.”

“I tried to find him at work the other day,” Gerard says, “he wasn’t in the diner. I waited in a booth for an hour and a half, but he wasn’t there.”

“Did you ask about him?”

“I was too afraid. What if his coworkers told Frank and I sounded more desperate than I already am? I just miss him,” Gerard says, “actually no. I don’t know if there’s a word for how much I want him back here. I don’t think there’s a word for how much I fucking hate that he’s been gone, and I hate not knowing what his life is like anymore. It’s killing me, and I can’t fucking stand this.”

“But he will come back,” Pete assures.

“Will he? It’s been nine days. Nine fucking days, and I haven’t even heard a peep from him. He hasn’t come home yet. He’s probably sleeping with Aaron, and talking about how stupid I am. He’s probably been wearing Aaron’s clothes, fuck, I hate this. I can’t stand him being gone anymore. I can’t stand it. It’s literally the worst feeling I’ve had in my life. I hate him being gone.”

“I know, I do too. I mean, you have it a million times worse, and I’m sorry,” Pete says, “really I am. When he comes back I’m going to murder him or something, god he’s just... he’s being a dick.”

“I bet Aaron has something to do with it,” Gerard scowls.

“Gerard, please,” Pete says giving Gerard a sideways look, “you’re exaggerating.”

“I am not! I told you what he said that night!”

“Yeah, you did, but you were pretty angry. You’re probably painting him in a different light than-”

“Don’t fucking test me, Pete. I miss Frank, but I’m not afraid of punching you in the face for taking Aaron’s side on this. He’s controlling, and I don’t like him! Aaron’s this perfect guy, right? Perfect guy, with white teeth, and a stupidly hot accent, and he’s also a prick. Everyone has flaws, okay? His is that he’s possessive, and he’s got this sense of ownership over Frank, and that is not okay. That’s probably why Frank’s been gone so long, I hate him. He could have Frank tied up in a cage or-”

“Okay Gerard, since you’re so adamant about him being rude to you after dinner, I’ll believe you on that, but listen to yourself. I can assure you of one thing, and that is the fact that Frank is not tied to a pole in Aaron’s basement,” Pete says.

“So he’s tied to a pole in Aaron’s wine cellar?”

“That’s basically the same thing as a basement,” Pete replies.

“But it’s not!”

“No it’s not, you’re right, but Frank isn’t tied to any poles anywhere,” Pete says, “I mean, probably. If he pissed off a stripper, there’s a possibility that he got handcuffed to one, but that’s really unlikely.”

“What would Frank do to piss off a stripper?” Gerard asks.

“I can’t think of anything off the top of my head, but it’s more likely that that’s what happened rather than Aaron caging him up,” Pete states.

“But you never know do you? It’s always the sane looking ones who end up being fucking psychos. You think people saw Norman Bates and were all like ‘oh yes, this fine gentleman runs a really creepy hotel, he must be a murder raging lunatic’? Because if anybody thought that, they wouldn’t have fucking checked in!” Gerard says, impassionedly. 

“Well, okay, but I feel like you’d sense it,” Pete says.

“Oh yeah, tell that to all the people on Hannibal,” Gerard says.

“Well no, I think Hugh Dancy is just an idiot on that show, but that’s beside the point.”

“He’s an idiot with a nice face,” Gerard mutters as he pushes himself against the kitchen counter dejectedly. He’s not having a great week, he’s been watching a lot of TV by himself. Gerard now knows way more about Veronica Mars than he ever intended to know.

“Gerard you’ve gotta be an adult about this. I know you like Frank, but Aaron likes Frank too, and right now, Aaron has him. You don’t.”

“Way to rub it in my face,” Gerard mopes.

“I’m not rubbing in anything, I’m stating facts that you already know. I’m not saying it doesn’t suck, because I know it has to hurt, but you’ve got to accept it as it is right now. Believe me, Gerard, I am rooting for you two, but I can’t do anything to make him come back, or make him stop dating Aaron,” Pete says.

“We could rent a truck,” Gerard starts, “and bring Aaron to a secluded part of the state, where our break line could ‘accidentally fail,’ and we can see where things go from there.”

“Gerard, you’re plotting to murder your roommate’s boyfriend.”

“Well when you say it like that it sounds kind of malicious,” Gerard replies.

“That’s because it is malicious, you dipshit,” Pete says.

“Don’t call me names, fuckhead, I’m upset!”

“You’re so stupid,” Pete says rolling his eyes.

They stare at each other for a few moments until Gerard’s forehead collapses against the counter again. His head has been predominately attached to flat horizontal surfaces for a week now. He’s had multiple instances of accidentally getting papers stuck to his face when he tries to pop his head back up.

The best example of this would be a minute later when there’s a rattling at the door, and then it opens. Gerard pops his head up to see who’s at the door, but luckily he’s facing the right way so he doesn’t have to turn around.

That’s when Gerard sees Frank for the first time in nine days, with an ad for Victoria’s Secret stuck to his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to lighten the mood a little bit. Really though, there wasn't much room for comedy in this chapter. I tried.


	21. Frank and Gerard Are Two Idiots Who Love Each Other But They're Too Stupid To Admit It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think the chapter name hit this one on the mark.

“Frank,” Gerard says in a high pitched voice.

“Gerard,” Pete says looking uncomfortable, “you have a bra on your forehead.”

“That’s not what I was expecting to hear,” Gerard says reaching for the ad and pulling it off his forehead. Really, he wasn’t expecting to make such a complete buffoon of himself only seconds after Frank came back home.

“Hey guys,” Frank says awkwardly, with a half wave and a guilty expression.

“I... um, I think I left my,” Pete starts, “actually, I don’t really have the energy to make up an excuse for why I’m leaving. I just am.”

Gerard and Frank both watch Pete as he slips past them, and then out through the doorway Frank just entered through. Then they’re left alone to the silence of the apartment.

For a long while, Gerard’s just sitting there looking at Frank expectantly, while Frank stands on the balls of his feet biting his lip anxiously.

“So,” Frank starts.

“I should punch you in the face,” Gerard states.

“Uh... probably?”

“I really should, because it was a real dickhead move to do what you did,” Gerard says.

“Yeah,” Frank nods, “are you going to punch me then?”

“No,” Gerard responds, “I am still your friend, or at least I think I am. Besides, I’m not one to stoop down to that level like you did.”

“Yeesh,” Frank says, “Well don’t hold back.”

“Alright. You’re an asshole, Frank. You’re a real justifiable asshole, and what you did last week was really immature of you. I literally cannot even believe you just walked out like that. You’re a fucking adult and you ran away from your responsibility, and you made us all worry about you.”

“Go on,” Frank says.

“You haven’t been home in nearly ten days, Frank,” Gerard says.

“I know,” Frank nods.

“That’s kind of, I don’t know, outrageous? Like, I’m pissed at you, and now you’re here and you’re trying to not make me mad or something, but I mean look at you,” Gerard yells, “You’ve got fucking your puppy dog eyes on, and I’m sorry, but that’s not exactly going to cut it.”

“I was kind of embarrassed,” Frank admits.

“About what?”

Frank shrugs, “just was. I’m... sorry? I mean, I am. I didn’t mean to worry you or-”

“Too late! I was ready to call the police or something, because you’ve been gone, and I didn’t know where the hell you were!”

“I was with Aaron,” Frank says.

“I know that, but I don’t trust Aaron. I don’t know him very well, he’s _your_ boyfriend, I’ve only barely met him, and he’s been wasting all your time.”

“God, are you still on about that?” Frank asks, looking a little irritated already, and he’s only been back for five minutes.

“You have no fucking idea,” Gerard says sternly.

“Well, you’re not exactly scotch free in what happened the other day. It takes two to have an argument you know,” Frank says.

“Yeah, but I didn’t run away,” Gerard says.

“Ugh... well, uh, any comment on the way you treated Aaron?” Frank asks expectantly.

“Not really. I take it he didn’t tell you what happened after you left?” Gerard asks.

“He said you two talked, but he didn’t say about what,” Frank says.

“He threatened me,” Gerard says, “Essentially. It was more of a warning, but it would have turned into a threat if I’d applied a little more pressure.”

“He did not, you’re making that up,” Frank says looking completely disbelieving. He just spent nine days with the guy, and he honestly doubts that very highly. Aaron is a fucking saint! The last thing he would do is threaten someone, especially someone that he knows is so important to Frank.

“Yeah? You think? He told me to stop hanging out with you! Frank, he thinks he’s got some sort of proprietary right on you or something. He claimed that being your boyfriend meant that he meant more to you than being your best friend. Like it’s a fucking caste system or something, and the last I checked, that is not an acceptable module of ranking considering it’s the 21st century, and we don’t live in India.”

“That was a long way to go for an analogy,” Frank notes.

“Don’t insult my analogies, Frank, you left for nine days,” Gerard says emphatically, “ _Nine_! Nine, the number of lives a cat has! Nine, the number of people in the fellowship of the ring! Nine, the number of planets in the solar system!”

“Well-”

“Don’t you dare disrespect Pluto, motherfucker.”

Frank’s face tries to stop itself from looking amused by that sentence, but he fails completely and ends up snorting. Why is that it’s when he’s trying to hold his ground and be defensive, Gerard goes and says something adorably stupid like that. It makes him fall even more in love with the guy who is not even his boyfriend.

“Are you disrespecting Pluto?” Gerard asks, trying not to let Frank throw him off of his anger. It’s really hard though, Franks laugh could cure deafness. 

“I’m sorry,” Frank says, “no really! You can continue now.”

“God Frank, your my best friend and I hate being mad at you, but I am! I’m really pissed at you, and you totally ruined my little tangent about the number nine!” Gerard says.

“Well you missed a lot of major things to do with nine, you could start over?”

Gerard rolls his eyes, “nah too late, the moment is ruined.”

“I am sorry, Gerard,” Frank says and he looks up at Gerard again with his big brown eyes. Gerard hates himself for how fucking lovable he finds that, and he has to hold himself back from going over there and kissing Frank. He wants that a lot. More than anything actually, but he restrains himself.

“I’m still mad at you, you know,” Gerard tells him.

“I figured,” Frank shrugs, “but you don’t hate me do you? I got mad, and we all say stupid things when we’re angry. That’s mostly the reason why I left. In the moment, when your blood is boiling, you sort of lose your filter, and I just... I said something I didn’t mean, but I thought I meant it because I was pissed. We all do stupid things like that. I just figured I’d get out of there before I made the situation a million times worse.”

“But you were gone for _nine days_ , Frank,” Gerard points out, “you could have just come home the next day, and that would have been fine, but you were gone for nine whole days!”

“I know, and I really shouldn’t have done that, but part of me was just really cowardly, I guess. It became harder and harder to come back until I finally just did. I know I should have come home sooner, but I did what I did, and now it’s done, so I can’t take it back. I just thought that you wouldn’t want me to come back or something.”

“Of course I wanted you back here, Frank,” Gerard says looking at Frank like he’s an idiot, “you really think I’d have blown up at you for not spending time with me, because I didn’t want to spend time with you? That sounds kind of counterproductive if you ask me.”

“So,” Frank says, “you’re still mad at me, but not like ‘I wanna tear your head off and put it in a meat grinder mad’ then?”

“Is that an official level of anger?” Gerard asks.

“Well it’s kind of gross, but I’m cool with it,” Frank says, “As long as you’re not that mad at me, because if you are than I think I’d like to demote the severity of it. Like maybe, ‘stubbed your toe, and now angry at the doorframe’ mad instead?”

“You’re a dork,” Gerard says, “I can’t believe I missed you.”

“You missed me?” Frank asks.

“You’re my best friend,” Gerard shrugs, navigating his recovery carefully, so that he doesn’t accidentally admit being in love with Frank. “And I’ve missed you for like two months. Leaving wasn’t much different from the last few months while you were with Aaron. It’s been basically the same thing only this time I just didn’t know if you were okay at the end of the day.”

“Well... about that,” Frank says and his tone changes to one that makes Gerard sure he’s about to hear something he’d really rather not.

“Yes?”

“Well, see some things happened while I was gone,” Frank says, “none of which were exactly good. Only two things, but both are pretty huge.”

“Oh god, start with the one that is going to have the least effect on me,” Gerard says, brushing hair out of his eyes. He stares down at the counter rather than at Frank, because he doesn’t know how much stamina he has to resist himself from jumping Frank whenever he licks his lips like that. It’s infuriating that Frank is being so attractive and Gerard isn’t allowed to kiss him. He’s getting kind of tired of it.

“I uh, I lost my job,” Frank says.

Gerard looks up a little surprised, “you what?”

“You heard me, I don’t want to say it again,” Frank says, “Basically, I apparently wasn’t allowed to kiss the customers. Aaron visited me at work, and instinct took over, and I got fired.”

“It’s Aaron’s fault?” Gerard asks, raising an eyebrow, “Well that doesn’t surprise me.”

“Okay, I know you hate him, but you could refrain from saying that to my face?” Frank snaps, because he really is getting sick of the Aaron bashing. Sure, Gerard may not like him, but Frank kind of does. Kind of. Not as much as he likes the guy who’s insulting him. Yeah, nine days has done nothing to dull the crush on Gerard, but he does still really like Aaron. Frank’s hopeful. That’s all he really can be. 

“Sorry,” Gerard says, “but I’m not going to take it back.”

“It wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t ‘professional of me’ and I ‘should’ve known better than to do something so inappropriate on work hours.’ Or at least that’s what my windbag of a boss said.”

“Well, you shouldn’t have been kissing him, but firing you seems harsh,” Gerard says.

“That’s what I was thinking. I did break a lot of plates last week, which might have been added to my punishment, I guess. That’s not the point though, I think I’m going to take this as an opportunity to actually do something real with my life.”

“Well what else then?” Gerard asks nervously.

“Um, this one you might not like so much, but hear me out before you start yelling.”

“Oh great,” Gerard groans.

“Well it involves Aaron.”

“Of course,” Gerard murmurs. All the things Gerard hates most in life have to do with Aaron.

“Well he, um, he asked me to move in with him,” Frank states.

“He did what?” Gerard yells, completely disregarding Frank’s other statement.

“Yeah, I knew you would have that reaction. Listen, I told him I’d think about it,” Frank tells him, “I told him I’d have to really analyze things, and of course I’d have to consult you first.”

“I bet he didn’t like that you needed to ask me,” Gerard says bitterly.

“He was fine with it! He understood, jeez Gerard, what did Aaron even do to you?” Frank asks angrily.

“He’s been hogging all your time, and sorry, I don’t like how he doesn’t seem to have any flaws, it weirds me out. If he doesn’t have any flaws, then that must mean he has one big one he’s hiding from people. Maybe he murdered someone when he was younger!” Gerard says.

“Gerard, he didn’t kill anyone.”

“Can you be sure?”

“Fairly sure.”

“That’s not a guarantee,” Gerard says, “He could have murdered someone when he was a teenager. Maybe he comes from a family of serial killers, or maybe he’s-”

“Gerard!” Frank interrupts, to get his attention. 

“What?”

“Shut up,” Frank says, “I’m not finished. I don’t think I’m going to say yes to Aaron. I’m not sure I’m really ready for that kind of commitment, but I have to ask you first. It’s your name on the lease, so I guess I should really ask permission to keep living here.”

“Frank, you know I’m not going to say no. I’m still pissed as fuck at you, but you’re still my best friend.”

“You sure have a hell of a way of showing it,” Frank says.

“Half of my job as being your friend is hating you most of the time, but I still l-like you,” Gerard says, nearly stumbling on the word ‘like.’ It probably wouldn’t mean anything to Frank if he’d said love, because friends are supposed to love each other, but Gerard’s broken heart probably couldn’t have handled it. Frank doesn’t love him back anyway, so he just hangs his head slightly and frowns.

“I don’t want to move out,” Frank says.

“And I don’t want you to,” Gerard responds.

“Good,” Frank says.

“Yep.”

“So I’ll tell him I’m not ready to move in then,” Frank says. Gerard smiles a little bit when he watches Frank walk past him into their apartment. He’s missed seeing Frank there.

“Yeah,” Gerard says, turning to look at him. Frank shrugs off his jacket and throws it over the couch. The apartment smells familiar, and he’s missed it a lot more than he probably should, but it’s comfortable. It’s his favorite thing about this apartment. It constantly smells like Gerard’s stupidly flowery shampoo, and also coffee. Other than Gerard, he’s missed this apartment more than anything.

“What are you looking at?” Frank asks, when he catches Gerard staring at him. His first instinct is that he’s probably got something on his face, but Gerard looks away as quickly as Frank points it out. Gerard doesn’t even say anything in response, he just focuses his gaze on the wall behind Frank.

Gerard’s not quite used to the feeling he gets when he sees Frank nowadays. He honestly can’t believe he’d never realized how gorgeous his roommate was. He is though. Frank’s one of the most beautiful people he’s ever seen, and he can’t believe it took him so long to notice that. It really shines a light on how observant Gerard is. Essentially, he isn’t in the least observant. 

“So what does this mean for your relationship with Aaron? Are you going to move in with him someday?” Gerard asks, because it just dawned on him that Frank never said he wouldn’t move out someday. If he does then Gerard will lose him even more. He won’t be there in the mornings anymore, and that’s terrifying. Gerard doesn’t want to live in this apartment without Frank. The last nine days were hard enough, if it were permanent, he’s not sure he could even stand it.

“I guess we’ll just see where this path takes me,” Frank says. Gerard’s gut twists a little bit with the feeling that this is like a ticking time bomb. He might lose Frank for real someday soon, and it’s almost worse not knowing when than it would be if Frank were leaving now. The fear of the inevitable is worse, because part of him still has to hope that maybe he won’t. 

Maybe it’ll be Gerard rather than Aaron who gets to keep Frank by his side forever. In this apartment or any other. That’s the dream at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter isn't as much of a filler is this one was.


	22. Gerard Finds Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well some things are overheard that weren't meant to be overheard.

“Look who finally decided to come back!” Patrick says when he walks into the apartment about two hours after Frank returned.

“Pete told you I came back?”

“Yes,” Patrick says, “What took so long?”

“Just some things,” Frank says.

“Things like the fact that you’re in love with your roommate, but you’re also dating a possessive Canadian man?” Patrick summarizes. That’s pretty much Frank’s life at the moment though.

“Why does everyone think he’s possessive?” Frank asks.

“Because Gerard was pretty distraught after what he said the other week, and I tend to believe Gerard over the guy I don’t know at all.”

“Well that’s because someone made sure that you never got to really meet him,” Frank says. He’s going through a pile on the counter with all the mail he missed after the past few weeks. Surprisingly, he doesn’t have that many correspondents, so it’s not a very large stack of papers.

“That someone being you?” Patrick questions.

“Well I was implying that it was Gerard.”

“But it was you as well. It was both of you,” Patrick says, “but you probably forgave him because you’re in love with him.”

“Patrick, do we have to do this? Yes, okay? I’m in love with him! I’m in love with Gerard! What do you want from me? Do you want a written confession, and a receipt for the missing half of my soul that I gave to him or something? I love him, like a lot. I love Gerard. There! Happy?”

“Repeating it isn’t going to make it any less true. I don’t know who you think you’re insulting there,” Patrick says.

“I’m still mad at you, why am I talking to you?” Frank asks himself.

“Well because you left for ten days, and I have every right to be as mad at you as you are at me,” Patrick says.

“God, I hate you,” Frank rolls his eyes. “Well fine then. Truce?” 

“I was never actually mad at you, Frank. I don’t know why you didn’t believe me, but whatever,” Patrick says.

“Please, can we just not talk about it? I don’t want to talk about him. I love Gerard, and honestly, it’s hell knowing that he doesn’t like me back. Talking about it more just makes me feel worse about myself. For now, can we leave it be? I only just got back. Maybe in a few days I’ll be up for the existential crisis that loving Gerard will give me, but right now, I’m not in the mood for it.”

“Sorry,” Patrick says, holding his hands up in defense. “So what are you going to do about Gerard then?”

“The same thing I was doing before,” Frank replies, “I’m going to pretend I don’t have feelings for him, and hope that Aaron can help me get over him.”

“How’s it going on that front?”

“Not well,” Frank says solemnly.

“It’s really not going well for you. Maybe you should try, I don’t know, talking to Gerard about your feelings?” Patrick says.

“I’m not suicidal, what are you talking about? Why on earth would you say that? Literally I would rather do anything but that, because at least this way, Gerard won’t laugh in my face. Let’s face it, Patrick. Gerard doesn’t like me in that way, and he never will,” Frank states.

“I wouldn’t say never,” Patrick shrugs.

“Well you may not think so, but I’m pretty sure that he’s never going to love me. Why would he? Dude, I’m just this weirdo who lives in the room next to his. He’s way out of my league, and he’s too fucking stupid to even notice that I’m in love with him anyway. I’m just his best friend, and that’s the closest I’m ever going to get to him,” Frank says, making the saddest face Patrick’s ever seen. He literally feels like going over to Frank and hugging him, but that would probably breach some boundaries given the fact that Frank thinks he teased him about Gerard.

“Just try talking to him,” Patrick suggests, “a heart to heart?”

“Whatever,” Frank rolls his eyes, “I’m going to go get food.”

Frank walks around the counter and past Patrick.

“You know the refrigerator is right there,” Patrick says, when Frank walks over to the front door. It’s been nine days, not nearly enough time for him to have forgotten where the refrigerator is. Also he has eyes, and it’s not like the thing is hiding.

“Yeah, but Gerard didn’t buy any fucking groceries. All we have are eggs,” Frank says.

“Well then you can make eggs,” Patrick says.

“We don’t have a pan,” Frank says. Patrick walks over to the cupboard and opens it, to see that there is a pan right there literally inches from his face.

“Nope. No pans here,” Patrick says, and he gives Frank a judgmental, and mildly amused, stare.

“Why do I need an excuse to leave my own apartment?” Frank asks, and then he’s out the door.

Patrick’s head falls down to the counter in frustration, when he hears the door open again. He picks his head up to look and see why Frank’s back, but the front door isn’t open. He looks at it curiously for a few seconds before turning his head and deciding he must have imagined it. That’s when he sees that the door that opened wasn’t the front door at all. It was Gerard’s door.

He’s standing there in the living room looking gobsmacked, staring at Patrick who’s staring right back at him like a surprised dog.

“Frank’s in love with me?”

“What?” Patrick asks, hoping that if he pretends he didn’t hear Gerard, then maybe Gerard will forget about everything.

Gerard’s brain is literally trying to think a million different things all at once. He’s trying to grasp and process what he’s just heard, and then he has to decide what the hell that even means. Frank said he loves Gerard, which is weird, but not unwelcome. That’s literally the best news he’s heard in years. Frank loves him, which is driving him crazy! In a good way. He’s so frazzled that what he just heard was even the truth. 

“Frank. He’s in love with me?” Gerard says, voice a little shaky. 

“I... uh, no?”

“Frank loves me?” Gerard says. 

“Uh, how many variants of the same sentence can you say before you’re verging on Yoda territory?” Patrick asks, because if he can’t deny it then he can at least try distracting Gerard.

“In love with me, Frank is,” Gerard says.

“Apparently only three times,” Patrick notes.

“So, he’s,” Gerard starts, “Frank. Loves me? Like, he loves me the way that I love him?”

Patrick tries for a minute to try to dig himself out of this hole, but when he decides that it isn’t possible he just sighs and nods. If he can’t dig himself out then he might as well get himself a bulldozer.

“He is?” Gerard says, with the most unreadable expression Patrick’s ever seen.

He’s so giddy that his brain forgot to send the message for him to smile. It’s too busy throwing a parade over the fact that Frank loves him. That’s all he’s wanted for like a month, and he’s not at all disappointed to hear that it’s mutual. 

There’s so many different thoughts in his head, that he almost forgets to breathe. Breathing seems inconsequential at the moment. Who needs air when Frank is in love with him? The only thing in the world he can come up with that would make him happier than he is right now is for him to be kissing Frank. That’s it. That is literally the only thing that could make him feel any better than he does right now.

“Yeah,” Patrick groans, and hides his face for a minute, “he’s in love with you. He has been for a really long time.”

“How did I not know? Why didn’t you tell me? How long has he loved me? How come you didn’t tell me when I told you that I was in love with him? What does this mean? Does this mean that I can ask him out or something?”

“Too many questions! Um, he’s been in love with you for a really long time, Gerard. Like a really long time. Really really really. As in, I didn’t even know you, or hadn’t met you by the time he was already in love with you,” Patrick says.

“So like three years?” Gerard asks incredulously.

“Three. Yeah. Sure. He’s been in love with you for three years,” Patrick says, because that’s not technically a lie. It’s actually been five years, but three years isn’t untrue or anything. Frank _has_ been in love with Gerard for three years, but he’s been in love with him for two years added to that.

“Why did no one tell me?” Gerard asks.

“Because you never showed any interest in him!” Patrick says.

“What about now?”

“Well now he’s in a relationship,” Patrick says.

“But he’s in love with me,” Gerard says, “What’s stopping us now?”

“He’s dating Aaron!” Patrick says, because Gerard seems to be ignoring that giant fact. That’s literally what’s been keeping them from each other for two months, and Gerard is brushing over that like it’s nothing. Like he hasn’t been plotting Aaron’s murder for eight weeks.

“But he’s still in love with me! I heard him, he said that!” Gerard says.

“You can’t just excuse the fact that Aaron does exist though. Gerard, you haven’t exactly been good for him the last few years. You’ve had him on this hook for so long, and you were too blind to see you were stringing him along like that. You’ve hurt him more than anyone else ever has or ever will. You have to take a step back and evaluate this information.”

“I love him, Patrick. I love him, and I don’t fucking care about Aaron. Frank loves me, and I love him, and every logical person in the entire world would say that means we should be together. We should, because that’s the simple solution to this endless pain I have because of not having him. I want to be his everything, okay? Everything in the world I can give to him, I want to give, and now that I know he wants me back, I’m not going to let an astonishingly attractive French guy get in my way,” Gerard says.

“It’s not really your decision, whether Frank is dating Aaron,” Patrick says.

“But if I tell Frank-”

“Is that the best thing to do?” 

“You don’t think so?” Gerard asks.

“I’m, well, I, uh,” Patrick says, “to be honest I want to see you two together more than anybody, but I don’t want you to jump to a conclusion just because you overheard something you weren’t supposed to.”

“But I love him and he loves me back. What am I missing?”

“You’re missing a really gigantic variable, Gerard. There’s three people you need to take into consideration. There’s you, and there’s Frank, but there’s also Aaron.”

“Fuck Aaron, Frank loves me!” Gerard says.

Suddenly, all the hate he had for Aaron is starting to feel a little less prominent to the point where he almost pities the guy. Aaron’s just this stupid rebound. Frank loves Gerard, and he doesn’t love Aaron. Gerard still kind of wants to punch Aaron in the face though. Mostly because currently, Aaron is Frank’s boyfriend, not Gerard. That can be fixed though. Frank doesn’t love Aaron, but he does love Gerard, so things are looking good for Gerard in that respect. All he needs to do is tell Frank, and then maybe he’ll finally get over this hell he’s been going through. Having Frank as his best friend the past five years has made his life infinitely better than it used to be, but that would be nothing compared to the way he’ll feel if Frank becomes his boyfriend. 

“I’m not going to tell you what to do, okay? I’m just going to pretend that it’s not my fault you found out, and I’m going to walk away like nothing happened,” Patrick says, standing up, and inching to the door.

“I’m going to tell him I know,” Gerard says matter-of-factly. He means it too. The second Frank steps back through that door, Gerard will tell him, and then maybe today will be the best day of his life. Gerard doesn’t even care about the last nine days, because what is nine days to him if he wins Frank in the end? It’s not like Frank is a prize with Aaron and Gerard being the competitors. Frank’s more important than that, but Gerard really does want to beat the crap out of Aaron. 

He wants Frank to look at him the way he tries to look at Aaron. The way Frank might already look at Gerard, but he’s just never noticed.

“You do that. I’m going to leave,” Patrick replies.

“I’m gonna tell him!” Gerard calls after Patrick.

Patrick doesn’t respond, he just closes the door behind him. Gerard is left standing there in his living room looking rather smug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well at least I'm giving you this chapter before you have to read what comes next.


	23. Gerard Kisses Frank and Then It All Goes To Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really don't know how to describe this one.

Frank had mostly just decided to walk around his apartment building a few times in hopes that by the time he got back, it’d be empty. In all honesty he’s not very hungry because he ate a bunch of potato chips before Patrick came over. He’s just not in the most sociable mood. By the time he makes his way back to the apartment, he just wants to sit in the living room and watch whatever the hell is on the TV.

When he enters the apartment he sees Gerard leaning over the counter biting his lip. He looks up when Frank enters, and he smiles which is slightly off-character. Frank doesn’t say anything about it though, because Gerard’s smile could light up the world. It’s a pretty strong energy source as well. Gerard’s smile is what gives Frank life.

“Hi Frank,” Gerard says, and he walks around the counter to stand in the kitchen. Frank is trying to figure out what he needs in the kitchen that he didn’t need a minute ago when Frank wasn’t there.

“Hey?” Frank asks.

“We need to talk,” Gerard says. Those are universally treacherous words. Luckily though, Frank’s not dating Gerard so he isn’t about to ask for them to breakup. Frank’s come to the conclusion that no cinematic conversation that begins with ‘we need to talk’ can end with all parties being in a relationship.

“About what?” Frank asks.

“Us.”

“That’s rather broad,” Frank says. He opens the refrigerator for something to do. He looks at the empty shelves for a few seconds before he closes it again. He then looks back at Gerard who’s closer to him than he had been a minute ago.

“Uh,” Frank says. He’d have thought that nine days might provide him with some sort of immunity to the way he’s in love with Gerard’s mouth, but all of a sudden he feels himself regress into being a horny teenager. Gerard’s mouth is like a foot away from his own, and it’s driving him crazy.

“Frank,” Gerard says simply and then he’s closer, which is quite possibly the closest Frank can ever remember Gerard being ever. He’s sure they’ve probably been closer than this, after all he’s fallen asleep on the guys shoulder, but right now he’s having trouble remembering.

“G-Gerard, why are you so close?” Frank asks.

“Felt like it,” Gerard says. He can feel Frank’s breath because he’s so close. Subtlety is for morons honestly. Gerard just wants to kiss the guy already.

“You felt like getting really close and popping my personal bubble?” 

“How old are you that you still use the term ‘personal bubble’?” Gerard asks.

“I don’t remember,” Frank squeaks, because Gerard really is obscenely close. He can smell Gerard’s breath even, and he’s really intoxicated by it.

Frank’s stubby fingernails dig into the counter behind him as he’s backed up so far that he’s practically sitting on it.

“Don’t remember how old you are?” Gerard asks, and Frank literally whimpers. Gerard is bigger than him, and he’s painfully attractive. He’s also really close so that Frank is seeing everything in high definition, and fuck does Gerard look good in HD.

Frank can’t even form a sentence so he just gets the one word he’s looking for, “What...”

“Don’t question it.”

“This isn’t real,” Frank says, “this isn’t happening.”

“Frankie,” Gerard sighs, brushing a hair out of Frank’s face.

“Gerard, this isn’t real,” Frank insists.

“Frank, I’m real,” Gerard tells him, “I promise.”

“No. No you’re n-not,” Frank stutters when Gerard takes another step even closer, so that he’s only inches away from his face. He’s so close that Frank can feel Gerard’s breath lightly falling over him. He can see the glimmer in Gerard’s eyes, and the smallest flaws on his face. Frank can hear his own heart, and hopes Gerard can’t hear it also, but it’s so loud that he’s sure everyone in the city can.

Frank’s eyes dart downward so that he’s not looking at Gerard. He can’t look at him right now, not when he’s this close. If he does look too hard than surely he’ll melt into the floorboards. Gerard has a way of seeing straight into him, right down into his soul.

“Why won’t you look at me, Frankie?” Gerard asks, putting a hand under Frank’s chin gently.

“C-can’t.”

“Of course you can, Frankie. Please? Just look at me,” Gerard asks softly.

“Gerard? I don’t know what you’re...” Frank drifts off, and then allows Gerard to pull his head up.

The way that their faces are so close, the way that he’s looking directly into Frank’s eyes, is making his whole face heat up. He feels uncomfortable looking so close to Gerard, but at the same time, he wants it so much. For so long he’s wanted Gerard to look at him like that and now that he is, it’s making him question his very existence. Why is he looking at Frank like that?

“Frankie,” Gerard whispers, eyes soft and warm in comparison to the fear of Frank’s, “you look so beautiful, Frank. I wish I could tell you how pretty you are.”

“Gerard,” Frank tries to shake his head, but he loses all motor control when Gerard’s other hand places itself on the side of his neck. Frank’s hands fist together, and his nails dig into his palms, as he tries to stop the inevitability of losing himself.

“You really are so gorgeous,” Gerard tells him.

“Why are you-”

“Shh,” Gerard says quietly, and his thumb ghosts over Frank’s bottom lip. Frank’s eyes fall closed gently at the movement, and when he opens them again, Gerard’s nose is nudging against his own.

For a second as long as a lifetime, a millennium, and a life age of the earth, Frank knows nothing. He forgets his own name, and he forgets about the consequences, because all he knows is Gerard’s face so close to his.

Then it’s happening. Frank’s most persistent, life-ruining dream. It’s happening. It’s no dream though, and he realizes that. He doesn’t believe it, but this is all happening, and he doesn’t believe that it can be. 

In Frank’s wildest fantasies he’d never expected Gerard’s lips to be so soft. He’d never expected to actually find out either. He thought it would always be a painful yearning, but it’s not anymore. Frank is actually kissing Gerard. Well, mostly Gerard is kissing Frank. Frank is having a hard time figuring out that this is actually happening, and he’s trying not to just faint right here and now. Gerard’s hand on his neck feels way too warm and fills him with so much bliss. His head is buzzing out of control and just leaving a shell of him behind.

Frank’s clenched fingers loosen up as soon as the feeling of Gerard kissing him washes over him. He’s still in disbelief, but he can’t quite help but feel a surge in his chest over the fact that this is real. This is _Gerard_.

Instinctively, Frank reaches up and grabs the sides of Gerard’s face. He grabs at Gerard’s hair, the way he’s always wanted to. He’s unable to process the silkiness of the soft black hair, and he’s trying to keep himself from tugging on it, but it’s too hard. He’s pulling Gerard closer, powerless to stop himself.

Gerard is almost bewildered that he really is kissing Frank. His best friend, the guy he’s lived with for five years, he’s kissing him. He’s kissing Frank. Frank is kissing him back at this point, hungrily, and Gerard’s not in a position to complain.

Frank only really has anything to say about it when he feels Gerard biting at his lower lip. It’s turning heated quickly, and Gerard’s asking for entry into his mouth.

“Gerard?” he asks, loosening his hold on Gerard’s hair.

“Wha-what?” Gerard questions, trying to stop Frank from ending the kiss.

“Why now?” Frank asks.

“What?”

“Why now?” Frank repeats.

Gerard sighs unhappily, and pulls himself away from Frank, but he keeps his forehead resting on Frank’s, “why what?”

“Five years, and _now_ you notice me?”

“I’ve loved you for years, Frank. Just took me a little while to realize it,” he says.

“But-”

“Frankie,” he whispers.

“Fuck it,” Frank says, giving up, and grabbing Gerard. He takes the back of Gerard’s head in his hand furiously, and he doesn’t let him go. Frank has wanted to kiss this boy for years, and that brief intermission took too long as it was. He’ll worry about that this all means some other time. Gerard doesn’t stop it, because, honestly, he doesn’t want to.

“I love you so much, Frank,” Gerard says desperately, as Frank gets more confident in the kiss.

It’s really not very sweet or innocent anymore. There’s a tongue in Frank’s mouth that is not his own, and Gerard’s got his hand on his hip, rucking up Frank’s shirt.

“Frank, fuck,” Gerard whines, as Frank claws at his back, trying to feel more of him. He’s wanted this for so long that he just can’t believe it’s happening. He’s never been closer to Gerard, literally, and he’s never been so close to having him.

“God, Gerard. I love you too,” Frank says, as Gerard pushes him backwards against the kitchen counter and starts attacking his neck. “So much.”

Gerard doesn’t reply, he just kisses all down Frank’s neck relentlessly, trying to make Frank swear as much as he possibly can. He’s never realized how much he loves the sound of Frank’s voice, but right now it’s everything Gerard loves in the world. Frank’s voice is a lot more guttural than usual, and he’s not in control of it.

Frank’s got one hand on the counter behind him, propping himself up, and the other on the side of Gerard’s head. If he doesn’t support himself with that hand his knees will surely buckle underneath him. Frank’s trying not to get too caught up on the reality of the situation, because he’s trying to keep himself in the moment. Gerard’s mouth returns to his, and he doesn’t want it anywhere else right now. He wants to just kiss the man he’s dreamt about every night for way too long. 

It isn’t really until Gerard’s got his hand at Frank’s zipper that he realizes what’s happening. He’s got Gerard at his neck again, with his hands on his crotch and all the blood is heading south, but that’s when he remembers Aaron.

“Gerard,” Frank says, voice suddenly full of panic, “Gerard, we have to stop.”

“Frank,” Gerard mutters into his neck, and Frank forgets what was wrong for another second before he snaps himself out of it.

“Gerard!” he says more forcefully and tries to push him off, “Stop!”

Gerard doesn’t understand what’s going on for a few moments, but when Frank pushes him away, he halts. His eyebrows furrow together to look at Frank quizzically, and he takes a step back.

“What’s wrong?” He asks.

“Gerard, I have a boyfriend,” Frank says, “and I’m cheating on him. I’m not a cheater, Gerard.”

“But Frank,” Gerard says, completely bewildered that _that’s_ why Frank made them stop. He’s worried about _Aaron_? Seriously? When Gerard just confessed he loves Frank, and the guy is worried about someone else?

“I’m not a cheater, Gerard!” Frank says, fixing his pants, but he’s still got a little problem down there, and it’s distracting Gerard.

“So breakup with him,” Gerard says.

Frank looks offended by Gerard’s complete apathy, and says, “But I like him.”

“You just told me you love me,” Gerard says.

“I like Aaron a lot too, Gerard. You waited five years to make a move. Do you think I can just overlook that, because _now_ you want something more? It took Aaron all of a day,” Frank refutes angrily.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Gerard replies, and he feels his blood start to boil, because how could Frank be so stupid?

Frank doesn’t see it as stupidity. He literally waited half a decade for Gerard, and when he’d finally started to move on, Gerard’s now all of a sudden interested. That’s not really something he can just be okay with.

“I’m telling you I like you now though,” Gerard tells him, like that’s not plainly obvious.

“Yeah. Now. Now is not five years ago when the confession would have been welcome. I can’t excuse that you’ve ignored me for that long just because you’ve changed your mind now,” Frank replies.

“I’m not sure I understand what’s happening. I love you, and you love me back. What am I missing? So what if I missed a few years, I want you now. It’s not about those years we missed, there were a whole hell of a lot more before we even met to account for, but I’m willing to put those aside. I love you now, and that’s what matters. We’re in the present, not the past, and I love you presently,” Gerard explains.

“Why are you being so defensive? It’s not like I owe you anything,” Frank asks.

“I didn’t say you-” Gerard stops himself, feeling pissed off, “you’re not being serious are you? You’ve been crushing on me for what, like since we moved in together? I’m here, Frank. I’m offering this up, offering up the option of a relationship, but now you’re all about Aaron?” 

“You’re mad at me? Me? For being the good person? I don’t want to cheat, Gerard! I don’t want to be that guy,” Frank says.

“Yeah, and I get that, but it’s not like you’re attached to Aaron or something. You can just breakup with him, and be with me.”

“You’re making this all about you, Gerard. I’ve got some fucking say in it too, considering it’s my life. Everything has to halt for you though. You tell me you’re in love with me, and I’m expected to just drop everything and be with you, because you say so?” Frank questions.

“You’re making me seem like the bad guy here,” Gerard states. “What did I do? I thought you’d be happy! Like, we can be together now! You don’t even like Aaron as much as you like me, so why would you even consider him?”

“Well for starters, I really don’t like _you_ right now. Honestly, you’re coming across as a real justifiable douchebag, and it’s really putting me off.”

“How is this happening? How is this fucking happening?” Gerard yells, “I literally thought that this would be a no-brainer. You said you love me, I heard you say it just now. To my fucking face you said it, and now what? You don’t? You don’t just because of stupid fucking Aaron?”

“I do love you, Gerard, but I just thought that... well maybe loving you was more about loving the idea of you. If this is who you actually are I’m not so fond of you anymore. You’re arrogant! You’re rude. You’re disregarding my feelings because you’re so stubborn!” Frank shouts back at him.

“Well yeah, because you don’t love Aaron. I’m not being arrogant, I’m being logical. You _don’t_ love Aaron. You _do_ love me. I love you back. What pieces am I even missing here? I’m not an idiot, there’s a logical conclusion to draw from that.”

Frank huffs and tries to get across how stupid Gerard sounds right now, “do you even hear yourself? You’re assuming everything based on something so fragile as love, and right now, I even told you, you’re just pissing me off.”

“You love me though,” Gerard says, repeating his same argument so much that Frank’s inclined to punch his teeth out to get him to stop, “you said you love me. All you need to do is breakup with Aaron, and then we can be together.”

“But what if I don’t want to breakup with Aaron?” Frank snaps.

“What?”

“What if I don’t want to breakup with him?” Frank repeats.

“Well then what about me?” Gerard asks.

“What _about_ you?”

Gerard is dumbfounded that he’s even having this conversation, “You don’t want to be a cheater, but you don’t want to breakup with Aaron. That makes me just... like this other guy.”

“Exactly,” Frank responds coldly.

“But you... but we? What about you and me?” Gerard asks, feeling like someone just slapped him in the face. Actually that would be much more preferable than what’s going on right now.

“I’ve got a boyfriend, Gerard,” Frank says, “and he’s not you.”

Frank turns to go walk over to his room, leaving Gerard stunned into silence standing in the kitchen.

“Frank!” He calls after, trying to sound lighthearted, because he’s still hoping that Frank is just joking.

“I’m going to bed,” Frank says.

“Frank?” Gerard asks again, and he feels like he’s literally never been so agitated over a situation before. This is quite literally the most painful feeling he’s ever felt, but right now it still feels like he’s numb. It hasn’t quite sunk in yet, but the fear of what’s to come has already started to intensify. This amount of pain can’t be possible, he’s sure of that. This can’t be real. Being this hurt is so farfetched it must be science fiction. 

The door closes, and Gerard’s left standing there, trying to figure out how this all just happened. He’s trying to run it through his mind and figure out where he messed up, but he can’t pinpoint when it happened. 

It was all working out so well. He’d kissed Frank, gotten to tell Frank that he loves him, and heard it in return. He’d nearly gotten into the guys pants, but then everything just crashed and he doesn’t know why. He doesn’t know what could possibly have ruined that moment, but now he’s standing in the kitchen and Frank’s not there with him.

He’s trying to figure out what Aaron has that Gerard doesn’t. Why does Frank want Aaron more than him? What makes him so much more special than Gerard? Gerard’s been there for Frank for so long, and Aaron’s given him a few weeks. Aaron is a dot on Frank’s map, while Gerard is ten times more.

How on earth did he manage to mess this up? He’s loved Frank for essentially five years, and Frank’s loved him back, and he screwed this up. This should’ve been the easy part. There shouldn’t have been any convincing needed. It should’ve just been obvious that Frank would dump Aaron, so how did Gerard mess that up? 

How is any of what just happened real? Gerard can’t find the answer, but it’s the reality of that question that’s making him hurt as much as he does right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm, uh, sorry?


	24. Gerard Can't Remember What Happened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summaries are hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I did update my other story "Fickle Reticence" if any of you guys care.

Gerard has been reevaluating the last seven hours in search of finding out what was true and what was not. His brain is playing tricks on him though, and he’s not certain exactly what was real and what wasn’t.

He’s positive that he kissed Frank. That definitely happened. Another thing that definitely happened was that Frank pushed him away and they had a fight. The next thing he knows is that he was left in the kitchen, but that’s where things get a little sketchy. He’s not sure what’s real and what’s not.

He didn’t drink anything, and that’s the weird part about his memory blur. He didn’t have any alcohol, so how could he have forgotten half of the last few hours?

Gerard looks around the dim room around him, and the part that’s really confusing him is the fact that this isn’t his bed. This also isn’t his room. It’s his apartment, but it isn’t his bed, and these aren’t his sheets. The blankets smell really nice, but that’s not what matters.

Why on earth is Frank right there though, and why is he asleep?

Gerard is trying to connect the dots from how he got to be standing in the kitchen to now, seven hours later, at three in the morning, in Frank’s bed. 

He’s fairly sure of at least one thing though. He didn’t sleep with Frank. He recalls giving Frank a hickey, but that might be one of the things he’d imagined. What if he did give Frank a hickey though? That would not exactly be a good thing. You usually remember giving someone a hickey, and now Gerard’s worried about the fact that Aaron’s going to notice it, if it’s even there.

Why the fuck does he care about Aaron? Probably because he doesn’t trust Aaron. He really doesn’t trust that guy, so he doesn’t know how he’d feel about Frank having a hickey. Aaron already knows that Gerard likes Frank, and if he saw that Gerard liked Frank, than certainly he saw that it wasn’t one way. That makes him an even bigger dick in Gerard’s eyes, because he knew they liked each other, and yet he still tried to steal Frank. Gerard really hopes that someday Aaron will give him a reason to punch him in the face. As it is now, he’s just a slimy bastard, not necessarily warranting to be smacked, but if he ever crosses that line, Gerard will gladly hit him.

“Okay,” He says to himself, and tries to piece things together to find what was real and what wasn’t.

He called Mikey after Frank went to bed. No he didn’t. He didn’t call Mikey. He’d thought about calling him, but realized how depressing and horribly lonely his story sounded, so he decided not to. He didn’t go talk to Pete or Patrick either, because he was worried that they were getting tired of hearing him talk about Frank.

The dream he’d just woken up from was certainly not real, because Frank was there, and they were happy. They were actually happy, with the same trashy apartment and weird neighbors, but they weren’t in this mess. They were just watching Batman. That was what made it happy. There wasn’t any drama about dating anyone, it was all just okay because they were doing something menial and easy.

That didn’t happen though. What happened was that Gerard was still standing in the kitchen. No, he was pacing. Yeah, he was pacing in the kitchen. Or was it the living room? He might have been pacing in the living room. He was pacing in either the kitchen or the living room. He recalls the TV being on, but it hadn’t been on when he and Frank were arguing. It might have been on though, because he’s pretty sure he kept getting distracted by a chest-heavy lady on a game show who wasn’t wearing a bra. It was distracting, and a little unsettling.

So if the TV was on he was probably in the living room.

The next part of what he remembers is the part that he feels has to be fake, but it’s the part that he remembers most vividly.

It was about twenty minutes after Frank had gone to his room, when Frank slinked out kind of slowly. Gerard had thought that he was going to start yelling at him again, but instead, he kind of jumped Gerard.

He’d gone over to Gerard, and there wasn’t even the slightest bit of hesitation, Frank just started kissing him. That part doesn’t seem like it could be real, but Gerard remembers it so well. He’s lying next to Frank though in Frank’s bed, so obviously something had to have happened between the two of them.

It was what Frank had been saying that Gerard got so freaked out by. 

“Just once,” Frank said quietly.

“What?” Gerard had asked, “Frank?”

“Just... just once, okay?” Frank asked, and he stood as close as he physically could to Gerard without stepping on his socks.

“Frank,” Gerard whispered, but that’s all he could say before Frank was kissing him again, even more than he had been a minute ago. Gerard no longer cared. He didn’t care about anything at all. Nothing but that. Nothing but the way Frank’s heat radiated off of him in a way that made Gerard feel him all over, even the parts where they were not pressed together. He felt all of Frank, and yet, it still wasn’t enough.

Frank pulled Gerard into his room. Well if Frank pulled them into his room, then Gerard must have been in the living room then. He doesn’t hear the TV going now though, so now he’s even more confused. He also doesn’t know why it matters what room he was in.

He does remember Frank throwing Gerard down onto his bed, which felt really weird considering it was Frank. It was fantastic, that’s true, but it was weird. Oddly enough, Gerard doesn’t remember having sex with Frank, because he assumes if he had, he would remember it. Logically, that’s what should’ve happened next, but it must not have been. 

Gerard keeps going through the memory to figure out what had actually happened.

Gerard didn’t dare put his hands on Frank though. Not yet at least. Not after what had happened last time.

“Gerard, god I love you,” Frank said. 

That’s his favorite thing to hear, especially from Frank. It carries more weight when it’s Frank than it does when it’s someone else.

“God, Frank,” Gerard said, and he’d felt guilt build up in his stomach. What they were doing was wrong, which sucks, because it was so good. Why does the wrong thing have to feel so unearthly right?

Frank mumbled something into his ear, and it was only when Gerard pinched himself that he found the willingness to get himself to stop what was happening.

“No,” Gerard said, pushing Frank away, “Oh god no.” 

“What?”

“No Frank! No, absolutely not. Not okay. No no no no no no no. Just no. This isn’t okay. Nope. No,” Gerard said, and he was pretty sure he got the point across.

“What? Why? You were ready to go, like, half an hour ago!” Frank exclaimed. 

“You’re right, Frank!” Gerard said, pushing Frank off of him, “You were right okay! Your life can’t just cease and desist because I finally came to my senses. Life doesn’t work that way.”

“But you like me, and god knows I love you,” Frank said.

“Well yeah, but it’s not really that easy, is it. Look, I’m not going to lie to you, okay? What I want is for you to breakup with Aaron and be with me. That’s what I want more than anything in the world, but that’s not something I have complete control over. If you want me too, than that’s great, but you are right in the fact that you shouldn’t cheat on Aaron. You’d effectively be cheating on me too. If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it right. Got that?”

“Aaron and I never said that we were exclusive,” Frank said.

“Frank, just no. Okay? No. You’re in a relationship, and I was wrong earlier. I’ll own up to it, okay? I was wrong,” Gerard said.

“But Gerard, I don’t know what to do. As stupid as it sounds, I’m afraid of breaking up with Aaron, because I don’t know if I want to, but at the same time, I’ve been in love with you for five years. The trouble is that I never thought this would be real. I never thought you would want me back, so I never really considered what I would do if this _was_ real.”

“Well now that it is real, do you still like me?” Gerard asked.

“Well I know I still love you,” Frank said, “but now I have to figure out if I _like_ you too. I also have to take into consideration that Aaron didn’t need to take five years to figure out what he felt for me. Five years is a long time, Gerard.”

“I know,” Gerard replied, bowing his head.

“And I feel like I’ve spent such a long time with this unhealthy obsession with wanting to be with you,” Frank said, “I just feel like, with Aaron, I’m more about being myself than about being the guy with a crush on you.”

“Just remember that I love you, Frank. Like a lot. I don’t want to make you do anything, that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do, because I want you to know that I love you. It would kill me to not get to be with you, but it would kill me more to know I only had a fake version of you that didn’t want to be with me,” Gerard said, confusing himself with his own words.

“You know,” Frank sighed, “About thirty minutes ago, this was a lot easier. You were being an asshole, and it was kind of disgusting, but now you’re you again. You’re the you I fell in love with.”

Gerard shrugged, “this is who I want to be to you, Frank. I hate Aaron, I’m not going to deny that, because, yeah, I see him as this guy who’s trying to ruin my chance at having someone as fucking perfect as you, but he’s not _my_ boyfriend. I don’t know what he’s like to you. I know that he’s not very fond of me, but-”

“But that’s important to me though. I want someone who’s going to be nice to my friends. That’s a really big deal breaker. That’s huge. If I can’t find someone who gets along with my friends, then maybe he’s not the one for me. You are my best friend, so you’re not like that,” Frank shook his head, “and fuck, when I put all these things out in front of myself like this, it feels like it’s obvious. Like, I should pick you, that’s what all logic says, but in so many ways these past few months have been some of the best in my life. I’ve finally felt like I’ve gotten back to myself. Fawning over you made me lose part of who I was, and being with Aaron is like being me again. I have such a codependency on you and that’s not healthy. That can’t be good for me, but I don’t like Aaron the way I like you.”

Gerard shook his head slowly, “I’m not going to tell you what to do. That’s how I made you mad at me in the first place, and it’s not okay to tell you what to do. That’s not my role.”

Gerard blinks a few times and feels himself fall back to reality. That had been several hours ago. The next thing that had happened was Frank trying to get Gerard to kiss him again, but Gerard had kept turning his head the other way. Frank was right, and Gerard still thinks he is. 

After that Frank begged Gerard to just stay for a few minutes, and Gerard couldn’t say no. Not when Frank looked so scared. After all the help Frank had given him a few years ago, just by being there, Gerard couldn’t just leave. Then Frank fell asleep on Gerard’s shoulder, and he didn’t have the heart to wake him up, and he eventually fell asleep too.

Gerard looks at Frank’s form beside him. He’s moved over to his side of the bed now so Gerard can leave if he wants. So that’s what happened over the last seven hours. He’s fairly sure that he’s got the complete picture now.

He’s got to make the decision as to whether he wants to wake up next to Frank, which sounds like the best thing in the world, or do the smart thing. He really should get up and give Frank his space, but he doesn’t want to. He _really_ doesn’t want to.

Eventually Gerard decides he’d better get up. Frank hasn’t made his decision yet, and staying here would only be wrong.

Gerard slowly pulls himself out of the bed, and looks back at Frank for a minute before he opens the door quietly and leaves the room. He looks at Frank again before he closes the door, and his heart stutters a little bit at how gorgeous Frank is when he’s asleep. It hurts that Frank isn’t his boyfriend.

Gerard does end up looking away, and he closes the door softly. It would be wrong to wake up next to him. Besides, if he ever does get that opportunity, he wants it to be real. If he ever wakes up next to Frank, he wants to wake up next to his _boyfriend_ Frank, not just his friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to make a blanket apology to all the people whose emotions I have hurt with this story.


	25. Frank Talks to Patrick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Frank is conflicted and Patrick is better than everyone on the planet.

Frank’s eyes feel heavy and gross when he wakes up. His eyelids are kind of sticky and unpleasant, so he recalls crying last night. Yesterday was really weird. 

Five years of dreaming about something and then it finally happened and he turned it down. He literally turned down what he’d been looking and hoping to have for over 1800 days, including a leap year, and when it finally happened he fucking chickened out. He pulled away because of Aaron. Aaron for god’s sake! Why would he be that stupid? Then Gerard was being a brat, and then Frank tried to forget he turned him away in the first place, and then Gerard was being perfect, and Frank became the brat.

Frank pulls himself up into a sitting position in his bed and looks around his room. The blinds never completely cover the window, because they’re old and not the right size. They allow the sunlight in and do very little to hide him away in his room. By the degree of light leaking through he’d estimate that it’s sometime around noon.

Frank looks around his sheets covering him and he sees that there’s a small indent where someone else was. It’s not very distinct, but it’s there enough for Frank to notice it. So Gerard’s not here then. 

A lot of last night’s kind of fuzzy, because Frank was doing a lot of crying, and he was just basically petrified for most of it. There was a point sometime around two in the morning where he woke up for a few minutes and saw Gerard sleeping there. It didn’t really sink in what he was seeing, but he remembers it now. Frank doesn’t know if Gerard was there all night and left when he woke up, or if he went away sometime in the middle. He also doesn’t know which of those possibilities he prefers.

Frank’s body collapses over the spot Gerard was last night, and he groans. It smells like his stupidly flowery shampoo, and Frank hates that. He loves it mostly, but he hates that he loves it. It makes him sad, because Gerard’s not there anymore.

Being early in the morning makes his brain so much more vulnerable to Gerard’s charm. He doesn’t know how long Gerard will give him to make his decision before he moves on. Frank doesn’t want to prolong it for a long time though. He wants to either shatter the idea of him and Gerard together, or just fucking get together already. 

He doesn’t know which would be better in the long run. That’s the biggest problem. The immediate reaction to which he should choose is that Gerard will definitely make him happier at first. That’s not a question. He definitely will mean more for a while, but what happens after that? What happens after the null of the honeymoon phase? In the end, Aaron is the responsible choice. He’s got the manners, the charm, the elegance, the money, and he doesn’t need to take years to figure out his feelings for Frank.

“I’m motherfucking Bridget Jones,” Frank mumbles to himself. Except in that movie Hugh Grant was a dick, so it was kind of obvious which one to choose. Frank’s choosing between two people one of whom is perfect, and the other is also perfect, but has a tendency to talk too much about comic books. 

Frank sighs and pulls himself out of bed. He doesn’t really want to, but if he stays there any longer then he won’t get up all day.

His body is still fuzzy and craves the warmth of the blankets he’s leaving behind, but he perseveres. Frank decides that he is not in the mood to wear real clothes and instead is going to wear pajamas all day. It’s a pajama kind of day. It’s also a binge drink on coffee kind of day.

Frank’s door creaks open as he walks out and looks around carefully Gerard. He doesn’t see Gerard, but instead someone much shorter.

“Where’s Gerard?” Frank asks Patrick.

“He and Pete went out for lunch,” Patrick says.

“And why aren’t you with them?” Frank asks.

“Gerard wasn’t in a good state. He kind of told us what happened,” Patrick says.

“Of course he did. Because it’s not like it’s my life too or anything. He should go around telling everyone about what happens with us!”

“Okay calm down Mr. Melodramatic. We already knew Gerard liked you,” Patrick says.

“You did? Oh god, so who didn’t know besides me? How long has he liked me, and how the hell did you find out?”

“Oh, Gerard’s known he’s in love with you for over a month, and he’s had it a million times worse than you ever did. I’m not trying to demean what you went through, but it was spread out over the course of five years, while Gerard had to live five years of pent up affection over about a month. Like, he’s been in hell. He found out because he got really jealous of how much time you and Aaron were spending together,” Patrick explains.

“Well why the fuck did he decide to ambush me? Did you tell him I liked him, that’s not okay-”

“I didn’t do anything! You know yesterday when we were talking about him? Well he was in the next room,” Patrick says.

“He was...” Frank says and then all the blood drains from his face, “you mean _I’m_ the one who told him? I told Gerard that I love him?”

“Indirectly, but yeah,” Patrick says.

“Well fuck! Dude, I forgot all about him in the next room! How could I have forgotten? I mean I know that it’s been a few days, but how could I have forgotten all about him being in the other room?” Frank exclaims.

“You had a lot on your mind,” Patrick says, “look, it had to come out sooner or later. I’m just glad that you two didn’t kill each other or something. I just don’t understand what’s keeping you apart now.”

“It’s the fact that this is something stupid and tricky like love. Love is literally the stupidest fucking thing in the world, and it’s been eating away at me for so long, and now I have to decide what matters more to me. Being the guy who keeps his pride and moves on from Gerard or being stupidly helpless and falls in love with him even more,” Frank says.

“Well that’s what you have to do now. Decide.”

“It’s hard though,” Frank complains. “Oh, and I guess I owe you an apology for not believing you a few weeks ago when you told me Gerard was in love with me. Given the circumstances though, can you blame me for thinking you were lying?”

“Well not really, but I was never mad at you,” Patrick says.

Frank groans and looks around the room for a long time, feeling really sluggish and tired. Everything in here reminds him of Gerard which is both fantastic, and terrifying. He feels guilty thinking about Gerard when he doesn’t have him yet. He wants Gerard so much though, but he also doesn’t know what would be best for him.

“And you know what the funniest thing about this all is? I love Gerard. Like, I love him a million times more than Aaron. I love him so much it feels like time stops when I’m with him. I’d rather have Gerard than Aaron anyway.”

“So why aren’t you with him instead?” Patrick asks.

“Because Aaron has been nothing but good to me, and he has never once looked past me. It didn’t take him five years to figure out that he wanted me, where it’s taken Gerard that long. Aaron’s an almost sure thing, but Gerard is barely there at all. He and I have a whisper of a chance, and he’s hotheaded.”

“But if you love Gerard-”

“With Aaron I know he actually likes me. Gerard’s love could just be a fantasy sprung from jealousy. That might be all it is. It might not be really real. It might be something he gets over,” Frank shakes his head. “What if I choose him, and he ends up realizing he never loved me? I can’t just go back to Aaron and say that it didn’t work out between us. If I were him, I would just laugh in my face.”

Patrick shrugs and sighs, “I know you’ve known Gerard longer than I have, and I know you know him better than I do, but for the last few weeks, I’ve been a lot closer to him than you have. I don’t think he could fake what he feels for you. I don’t think his brain could psych him out like this. There is no way his brain is really that cruel.”

“But how do you know it’s for real, and not a temporary thing?”

“I guess I just do. Intuition. He looks at you the way you’ve been looking at him for five years, only with him he looks way sadder. Frank, you look at him like he’s a living tragedy, you’ve already got it bad, but when Gerard looks at you, it’s like seeing a guy fond over a ghost.”

“I love him a lot, Patrick,” Frank says, “but I don’t want to lose myself by falling for him.”

“Why do you have to lose yourself?” Patrick asks, “You keep saying that about yourself, like you’re not even you anymore, but I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Listen, I’ve never met the Frank who isn’t in love with Gerard. I’ve never met him, because he was around before I came into the picture. But I can tell you something, Frank. You are a good person _now_. I like you, and I enjoy hanging out with you. To be honest, I don’t want you to change. I want you to still be Frank. With Gerard, you’ll still be you. I don’t know why you think you’re going to change, because I feel like you’re already you. With Gerard, you’ll be you but you’ll be happier. I would give anything to see you actually happy for real, Frank.”

“But what if I was a better person before Gerard knew me? Before you knew me? What if that guy was a million times superior?”

“Well then I don’t care about him. Frank, you do realize without Gerard, if that’s what you ultimately decide to do, you end up changing. If you’re a different person, I hope you realize that you have to kill the other person. You have to leave who you are now behind, and that’s just not... that would be the worst thing I can possibly fathom. Frank, you’re friends are here for _you_ , you this really sweet guy, who yeah, is in love with his roommate. We’re not here for the guy who’s stringing along a French Canadian guy who, I’m sorry, is a little arrogant. I’m not saying we won’t be there for you if you go another way, but it’s going to be hard to see you break your own heart, and Gerard’s as well.”

“So you’re telling me that I should choose Gerard,” Frank states.

“I’m not telling you to do anything. I’m stating what I would prefer you do, but I’m not ordering you to do it. There is one thing that I will say, that I know you’ve noticed. Ever since you met Aaron, you’ve been driving all of us away. Frank, there’s a wedge between you and me and Pete. There’s a wedge between you and Gerard. Aaron’s been cutting you off from us. It’s almost like he’s isolating you so that you don’t have any connection to your friends anymore,” Patrick says.

“You’re reading too much into it.”

“I’m really not,” Patrick refutes, “you don’t see what it’s like, because you’re seeing things from the inside. If you could see it the way it is, you’d see that maybe you’re perfect boyfriend isn’t so perfect at all.”

“Listen, I’m in control of what’s going on with my life. Aaron is financially stable, he’s charitable, he’s responsible, he doesn’t overreact the way Gerard does, he’s intelligent, and charming. He’s a really proper guy. Really, just, good for me.”

“Yeah, but who makes you laugh? Who makes you have to stop yourself from laughing at things you really shouldn’t be laughing at? Who would you rather watch a twelve hour marathon of Lord of the Rings with? Who includes you in the conversation, and talks about real things instead of business and wealthy people things?”

“Patrick, Aaron is the smart choice. He’s the one who’ll be good to me, and always be there if I need him. He’s the one who I can depend on,” Frank states.

“Aaron may be the smart choice,” Patrick says, “but that doesn’t mean he’s the right one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I may not be updating anything tomorrow because I'm going to a You Me At Six concert. Also: omigod You Me At Six Concert!


	26. Frank and Gerard Love Each Other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah so...

Gerard arrives back at the apartment sometime after two in the afternoon to find that no one else is there. He’d thought that Frank would be here, or Patrick at least. Apparently Patrick was more intent on seeing Pete than he was Gerard, which doesn’t necessarily surprise him.

Still though, Gerard never knows what to do with himself when the apartment is empty. He usually ends up playing music too loud and binging on the Sims, but he’s not in a lively enough mood to do that. For the last week this apartment has actually seen a lot of company, just not Frank. Usually Pete and Patrick trying to convince him that it’s okay to watch Batman without Frank, but he disagrees. 

Then there was Mikey who wouldn’t say anything but Gerard would just know that he was looking at Gerard the same way he been looking at Frank the past few years. Gerard hadn’t known that Mikey had been looking at Frank like that, but looking back on it now it makes a lot of sense.

Gerard turns the TV on which really should’ve been on in the first place, because when isn’t it? He scrolls through the channels trying to find something he wants to watch, but nothing is on at this time of day other than cooking shows and sitcoms from the 80’s. Gerard settles on some baking show that doesn’t end up satiating his boredom, but actually ends up making him hungry.

“Gerard?” someone says and he looks up surprised. He hadn’t heard anyone come in, so when he turns he’s surprised to see Frank standing there.

“Mhm, yeah?”

“Why are you drooling?”

“I... uh, nothing. Just the TV,” Gerard says, and grabs for the remote before switching it off with a distinct sound that’s hard to describe.

Before the screen turns blank though, Frank looks at it and giggles, “Yeah, because dog food is extremely appetizing.”

“Shut up, it was a commercial,” Gerard says.

“I’m sure,” Frank grins, and hops over the couch to sit next to him.

“So, uh, where were you?”

“What?” Frank asks.

“What?” Gerard says back, “I mean you weren’t here. Where’d you go?”

“I went to go see Aaron,” Frank says.

“Oh.”

“You could hear me out before you start making that fucking ‘oh’ sound like your doctor told you that you’re dying.”

“Sorry?”

“Just let me tell you what happened,” Frank says.

“Am I going to like it, because if not, then I’d really prefer you didn’t say anything at all,” Gerard says, “I don’t want the negative diagnosis if it’s only going to make me feel shitty about myself.”

“Give me a minute to talk,” Frank says, “or a few.”

“Fine,” Gerard replies, and he slouches into the couch a little further with his face sad and partially scared.

“Okay well, basically I wanted to talk to Aaron about all the stuff that’s been going on. He’s not an idiot, right? So he must have known that something was going on between you and I. So I went over there and I talked to him about it. Like, I wanted to talk about our relationship, and then about you, and then about you and I’s relationship. Like, I figure that I’m an adult, right? I don’t feel it, but technically I’ve got to take some fucking responsibility for myself. Just wanted to have a hopefully mature discussion about this decision I have to make, and Aaron seemed okay with that at first.”

“At first?”

“Well I’m getting to it,” Frank says, “so anyway, I told him that I needed some time to think about what I wanted to do, I didn’t really give him the full set of details, because that’s sort of between you and me... and Pete and Patrick and Mikey and everyone else that we’ve told.”

“Right, sorry,” Gerard says wincing because that may have been somewhat of a dig at Gerard’s loose tongue.

“Well I’m about as guilty as you are, though I never tell people, I just have a very transparent face, so people always seem to know what I’m thinking. That’s not what this is about though. So anyway, I went to talk to Aaron, and I asked him if he could give me some time to figure out what I wanted to do, and you know, I figured he’d be all like, ‘yeah okay, seems fair, tell me when you have an answer,’ but he didn’t even kind of do that.”

“What did he do?” Gerard asks.

“One thing led to another and he threw a bowl at my face.”

“He did what?” Gerard asks incredulously and then looks at Frank. He tries to find any scratches, but Frank doesn’t seem to have been hurt.

“Aaron threw china at my face,” Frank repeats.

“Okay, so please give me the details as to how that happened. What ‘one thing’ led to you being attacked with a dish?” Gerard asks.

“Well I told him that I didn’t know what I was going to do about the situation and he got really defensive. So he was like ‘you’re with me, I’m your boyfriend, so you have to choose me.’ So I was like ‘but this is a big decision, I just need some time, I haven’t made up my mind yet’ but then Aaron was all like ‘but Gerard isn’t as good as me, and I’ve given you two months, you can’t just say that’s it because you like someone else.’ I was getting kind of pissed by that time and I said something like ‘but it’s not like I can just pretend I don’t like him and be with you just because you want me to, and besides it’s not really about what you think I should do, it’s about what I want to do.’ So he just got really fucking pissed, and I told him that if he was going to act like that about this whole thing, then that made my decision about a million times easier. Because I already knew I was leaning one way rather than the other, and the guy fucking lost it. I told him that if this was how he was going to be acting I don’t fucking care about choosing one of you, I just know that I don’t fucking want to date Aaron,” Frank says, almost completely in one long breath, until he finally stops to breathe, “at which point he threw a bowl at my face.”

“Okay,” Gerard says, “so then I’m assuming one of you broke up with the other?”

“He threw a motherfucking bowl at my face! Of course I broke up with him! Literally all I wanted was to have a cordial discussion about the future of my love life, no guarantee whether Aaron would be in it or not, and he threw stuff at me for that,” Frank says, rolling his eyes, “but anyway, I was wondering if you knew anybody who I might like.”

“What?” Gerard asks.

“Well I’m recently single, and I know you like setting me up with people. So I was thinking that you could try finding me someone. The only guidelines I want you to follow are that they have to really like Batman, and I’d kind of prefer it if they lived sort of close. You know, like that’s not a deal breaker, but it would be really nice if I didn’t have to go too far.”

Gerard nods and looks at Frank with an expression like he’s finally figured out what the hell Frank is talking about. He’s a little slow today, because an hour ago he was miserable. Now though he feels completely different. He’s sort of got this really nervous band around his chest telling him not to get his hopes up, but at the same time he feels like this is it. This is finally it. Gerard doesn’t see what else Frank could be talking about if not the obvious.

“Batman,” Gerard says, “that’s your proviso?”

“Mhm, I like dorks who are into superheroes.”

“I mean, I do know this one guy who lives kind of close that likes Batman,” Gerard says.

“Yeah? How close?” Frank asks, turning to Gerard with a really blank expression on his face.

“Well from here, he lives a few feet away,” Gerard states.

“A few feet?” Frank asks, and pretends to balance that in his brain, “Well I guess I could make that work.”

“You think so?” Gerard questions.

“Yeah, I mean it’s a little inconvenient for me, but if it was meant to be, I guess I’ll just find a way to work around it,” Frank shrugs.

Gerard nods, “Well there is one thing you ought to know about this guy though. He’s already in love with you.”

“Is he? Well that’s probably a good thing, because I think I’m in love with him too.”

Gerard smiles over at Frank, until he just doesn’t want to wait anymore. He’s sick of pretending, and he’s sick of not kissing Frank. Gerard leans over and grabs Frank and he then presses his forehead against his. For a few moments that feel both too short and too long, they’re just sort of staring into each other’s eyes. Frank can see the tiniest details of Gerard’s eyes, including little golden flecks that catch the light of the room, and make him seem other worldly.

“No, I was wrong,” Frank says quietly, “I don’t think I’m in love with you at all, Gerard. I’m positive.”

Gerard grins until Frank puts his hand at the back of Gerard’s neck and forces him closer. There isn’t any more room to get closer though so they end up closing the space completely.

For the first time in his life, Frank doesn’t feel any remorse for feeling the way he does about Gerard. He doesn’t regret loving him, or regret the five years he’s spent fawning over him, and he doesn’t regret the suffering he’s been through to get here. It’s the fact that he made it to this point at all that makes him feel unapologetic about being here right now.

He knows that yeah, maybe he’s going to have a hard time trying to find himself again, but Frank can finally just let himself be happy. Gerard likes him, and that’s all he’s wanted for five years, so he’s sick of overthinking. He doesn’t care anymore about whether or not Gerard is the smart choice, or even if he’s the right choice, because Gerard is the choice that makes him happy, and really, that’s all he needs to care about. He should probably be kind of mad at Gerard for taking five years to sort himself out, but it’s not about how long it takes really, it’s about the fact that he figured it out at all.

Really though, Frank just doesn’t care. He likes Gerard and for fucks sake, the guy likes him back.

At the bottom of his stomach, Gerard is a little scared that Frank is going to pull himself away from Gerard again, but if that happens, at least he has right now. He can’t even believe what he feels for Frank. It’s not something that can really be put into words. It just is. The way he feels for Frank is just the way he feels, and there’s nothing he can do to describe it. Something a lot like love, but it’s of a much more potent degree.

The first time Gerard had kissed Frank was somewhat of a mistake, because Frank was still in fact in a relationship. Right now, right here, this is Frank. This is Frank who doesn’t have any attachment to anyone else at the moment, except for maybe Gerard himself. That’s a little strange to think about, but it’s invigorating all the same. He loves Frank, like a lot, and Frank is kissing him, and he’s not someone’s boyfriend anymore. Well hopefully he’ll be someone’s boyfriend soon, but Gerard would really prefer that boyfriend to be himself.

Yeah, Gerard can see himself being a boyfriend to someone as long as that someone is Frank. Frank’s the only one though. It’s only him. Gerard wouldn’t want anyone else.

Frank pulls away after a moment and all he does is wrap his arms around Gerard in a tight hug. He then he sticks his head into Gerard’s neck, and Frank thinks to himself that this is perfect.

“I’ve waited so long for this,” Frank mumbles into Gerard’s neck, “and I don’t have a long life to live, so I’m not going to wait any longer.”

Gerard just sits and accepts the feeling of Frank pressed against him, his heat like nothing else in the entire world. He’s probably the only person or thing in the world that can be as perfect and breathtaking as he is. 

Frank’s always had this weird talent to get to all of Gerard’s senses. It’s gotten worse for Gerard ever since realizing he’s been in love with Frank, but really Frank is an immersive person. He’s the only person in the world who smells the way he does. He smells like Frank. Kind of evocative of something else, but Gerard’s not quite sure what. Perfect though. He smells perfect. He’s also got this really dulcet, and yet also silvery voice, that literally makes you feel like you’re getting hugged with words whenever he speaks. He’s just all around really mesmerizing in everything he does. 

“Do you wanna watch Batman with me?” Gerard asks.

“You know what? I do,” Frank says grinning widely, “I really really really do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there's actually a few more chapters than you're probably expecting there to be. Like maybe ten more.


	27. Frank is More Important Than Batman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter twenty seven, time for some smut.

“Hey Gerard,” Frank says, sometime on hour two of their Batman marathon. Gerard doesn’t joke around when it comes to raunchy superheroes from the 60’s.

“Yeah?”

“Well I was just thinking,” Frank says, “that I don’t want anything to change between us two. Like, I still want you to be my best friend. I don’t want that to change. I just want you to be my best friend who lets me kiss him.”

“I thank that sounds good,” Gerard nods, “but are you sure that all you want to do is kiss?”

“What are you suggesting, Gerard?”

“Nothing at all. It’s getting kind of late though.”

“Oh you are cavalier as hell,” Frank says, “You’re not even fucking trying are you? God I hate you.”

Gerard smiles at him, “I know you do.”

“But you’re right, it is late,” Frank says.

“I’m tired of Batman,” Gerard replies.

“Are you okay?” Frank asks after hearing that, “You feeling okay? Got a fever or something? Are you sure you mean that?”

Gerard grins, “There _are_ a few things more important than Batman.”

Frank snickers at him, “You’re such a dork, I can’t believe I like you.”

“It’s because of my winning personality and charming smile,” Gerard says flashing his teeth at Frank stupidly.

“You’re an idiot,” Frank says pulling himself up from the couch. Gerard watches him for a moment until Frank grabs a hold of his hand and lifts Gerard up behind him. Frank doesn’t really know where to go or anything, so he just turns to look at Gerard and steps closer to kiss him again.

“Name a few things more important than Batman then,” Frank asks, and Gerard shrugs.

“Air,” Gerard says and he looks up at the ceiling to think, “Um, what else? Pizza is pretty important. Pizza is very important actually. What else is more important than Batman? Music maybe. Depends on what kind of music though. Short guys with lots of tattoos are more important than Batman.”

“Oddly specific.”

“Well you know,” Gerard shrugs, “I like short guys. Batman is tall, I don’t like that about him. As far as I know he’s boringly unmarked too.”

“I _like_ boringly unmarked,” Frank says.

“Do you?” Gerard asks, “Then you might like Batman.”

“Batman is fictional,” Frank says.

“I take offense at that,” Gerard scoffs.

“Sorry,” Frank says, but he doesn’t look in the least bit apologetic. He’s smiling up at Gerard, and he gets on his tiptoes to kiss him again. Gerard leans down to meet Frank halfway, and Frank is pretty sure that he’s never going to get used to kissing Gerard.

He’s literally dreamed about kissing Gerard for five whole years, and it’s never going to quite sink in that he gets to actually do that. He gets to really kiss Gerard for real, and Gerard is kissing him back also for real. Fuck Aaron, who needs him when Gerard is here?

One thing Frank doesn’t regret is that he turned down Gerard last night, because he’d have really regretted that if he had. Frank may not like Aaron the same way he likes Gerard, but he sure as hell doesn’t want to be a cheater. Frank’s decided, considering Gerard initiated it, that it doesn’t really count as cheating. It’s all in the mind really, but Frank’s glad that right now, this is Frank without an anchor. He doesn’t have any ties to Aaron so he can be with Gerard without feeling bad about it.

“You’re more important than Batman,” Gerard says with his hand tangled in Frank’s hair. 

“I love you too,” Frank says, because if Frank means more to Gerard than Batman does, then it’s a statement synonymous with ‘I love you’.

“You’re more important than any comic book,” Gerard says.

“You don’t mean that,” Frank whispers. Gerard’s nose is pressed against his so that they’re looking directly into each other’s eyes.

“You significantly underestimate the way I feel about you,” Gerard says, with a smile in his voice. “How about you let me show you?”

“Or,” Frank says, “You could let _me_ show _you_.”

Gerard doesn’t have any room to say anything before Frank is grabbing his hand and leading him out of the living room. Frank leads them into Gerard’s room, because it’s kind of a lifelong dream of his to sleep in Gerard’s bed.

“Frank,” Gerard starts, but Frank interrupts him by attacking his lips with his own. Frank might be a bit too eager, but he has been waiting for so long, and he doesn’t want to wait any longer.

“Gerard I’ve got to tell you something,” Frank says.

“If it’s bad news I don’t want to hear it right now,” Gerard tells him. The room is fairly dark because Gerard likes to lurk as if he lives in a cave. The only light that’s on is a flimsy bedside table lamp that’s probably older than Gerard is.

“No it’s not bad news,” Frank says. “I never slept with Aaron.”

Gerard pulls away from Frank a little confused by that statement, “you what?”

“I never did,” Frank admits again looking sheepish, “I tried, but I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Really?” Gerard asks, “But you told us-”

“Well I never told you anything, you just assumed.”

Gerard smiles and laughs airily, “You have no idea how happy that makes me, Frank.”

“Yeah?” Frank asks.

“Hell yeah,” Gerard replies, and Frank grins as he starts kissing Gerard again. Frank’s pretty glad too, because he’d only ever wanted to sleep with Aaron because of the fact that he wanted to get rid of the feelings for Gerard, but right now, he doesn’t have to get rid of those feelings. Those feelings are there, and they’re there to stay, which maybe isn’t so bad an idea.

Frank pinches himself one last time to make sure that this is real, and that it’s really happening, and when he decides that it is, he has a glimmer in his head as he realizes that he gets to control this fantasy. Frank’s had so many thousands of dreams, most of them wet, where he pictured scenarios almost exactly like this one, but this is completely real. The emotions are real, the feelings are really real. The sight, the sound, the sense. It’s all real.

Those had all been delusions of denial though, and right now this isn’t something that’s going on in his head. He can’t really control his fantasies, but he gets to control this one.

Frank opens his eyes in the kiss with Gerard, and looks at him for a moment just to remind himself how lucky he is. He’s never going to get used to this, but right now he wants to give himself a run-through of what he’s never going to get used to or forget.

Frank pushes Gerard back, gently at first, until he’s near the corner of the bed. When Frank is sure that he’s close enough, he pushes Gerard further back until they fall in unison onto the mattress. Frank supports himself on his elbows so that he doesn’t crush Gerard, but he doesn’t ease up the relentless kissing. Frank’s not going to yield kissing Gerard now that he gets to. He’s not an idiot.

Gerard doesn’t make any objections, he just puts one of his hands on the back of Frank’s neck, and the other he glides through Frank’s hair.

“Frank I have a small dilemma,” Gerard says, which is his weird way of saying that his belt is stuck in one of the loops. Frank snorts at him and buries his head in Gerard’s neck for a second before looking back up, and seeing Gerard frowning like he’s actually bothered.

“Don’t bother with it then,” Frank says, and he uses the more effective strategy of just pulling Gerard’s pants off, and around his side.

“Well see now, I have another problem,” Gerard says, because Frank’s body is in the way of him tugging his pants all the way down.

“You are literally so hopeless,” Frank says, “How do you even get yourself dressed in the morning.”

“Through much difficulty,” Gerard says, and Frank does the actual removing of pants for him, because Gerard can’t.

“I can imagine,” Frank says, and he figures that while he’s at it, he can be extra productive and discard his own pants. Gerard doesn’t complain. He does the opposite of complain. His eyes light up. He looks like a dog, but the shadow of the light in the dim room gives a tint to the side of his face, so he looks like a dog on acid.

“God, you’re a dork,” Frank says, and then his eyes flicker over to the corner of the room for a second where there’s a large stack of comic books. Apparently shelves are too expensive and they wouldn’t hold all of Gerard’s shit anyhow. Gerard doesn’t seem to mind making a mess, which is evident from the monstrosity of chaos in his closet.

Gerard smiles up at him with a grin that only confirms Frank’s dork statement further. Frank rolls his eyes and decides to start kissing at Gerard’s neck, while his hands ruck up the hem of his shirt. Gerard’s got a similar idea, only he’s trying to more or less pull Frank’s shirt off, but he’s having a hard time because Frank’s still attached to Gerard’s neck. He really doesn’t seem to understand the logistics of taking clothing off. Frank is almost at a point where he wants to laugh hysterically if it weren’t for the fact that he’s horny as fuck.

Ultimately though the laughter wins out and Frank makes an unflattering snorting noise.

“Don’t laugh at me! My brain is a little fuzzy, okay? It doesn’t help that my best fucking friend is giving me a hickey.”

“Well do you not want me to give you a hickey?” Frank asks looking down at Gerard, who’s pretty much helpless underneath him.

“No I do, but I also want to get your fucking shirt off,” Gerard says. He seizes his opportunity and tries to pull it over Frank’s head. For the most part Gerard makes it a success, but the shirt does nearly get caught on Frank’s shoulder.

“This is so much more talking than I had ever imagined there to be,” Frank says.

“I’m not used to having you kiss me!” Gerard says defensively.

“I’m not complaining,” Frank says, with a grin. “Lift yourself up a little bit, let’s see if I’m any better at taking shirts off.”

“Opposable thumbs are wasted on me,” Gerard grumbles, but he does as Frank asks so that Frank can finally press back down, and feel as much of Gerard’s skin as he can. Frank decides that he is starting to detest underwear, but he’ll attend to that later, because right now Gerard’s body is new to him and he wants to drink it all in.

“Wow, so you’re hot as fuck,” Frank states matter-of-factly.

“I was thinking the exact same thing about you,” Gerard notes, looking up at Frank. He takes his hand and traces a tattoo on Frank’s arm with his fingers.

“It’s settled then, we’re both hot,” Frank says resolutely and then leans down to attack Gerard’s mouth again. 

It has been so long since Frank’s kissed someone who he actually wanted, with his whole heart, to kiss. Aaron was an okay kisser, but he’s not Gerard. Gerard’s better simply because he’s Gerard. Frank thinks that it’s been at least six or seven years. Far too long in any case.

Frank hadn’t exactly been expecting Gerard to lift his hips upward, so when he does, Frank whimpers gently. Not because he doesn’t appreciate it, because he _definitely_ appreciates that.

“Oh god,” Frank says into Gerard’s mouth, and he grabs the sides of his head to kiss him harder. Really though, there’s not much room to make it any more heated without one of them accidentally biting off the others tongue, which would not be ideal. Frank needs Gerard’s tongue for other things, and vice versa. 

There really isn’t any space between him and Frank anymore, which is making Gerard’s head spin. His body is pressing and molding to the shape of Frank’s so that he can feel almost every inch of him, but it’s still not enough. It’ll never be enough, and he knows that. He’s aware of sweat starting to stick to his body, but he doesn’t have room to care, and Frank doesn’t seem to either.

“Not enough, Frankie,” Gerard hisses, “not enough.”

“Yeah, sorry,” Frank nods and he pulls himself away ever so slightly, leaving a hand on Gerard’s hip. Frank angles the both of them to be a little more aligned with the shape of the bed, and he bites down Gerard’s collarbone again, and then a little further. He stops at Gerard’s chest where Frank’s tongue ghosts over a nipple before he moves further down.

Gerard becomes acutely aware of how quiet the room actually is. He hadn’t realized before, but there’s really no other sounds aside from him and Frank. Somehow that makes Gerard even antsier.

“We’re going to really do this, right, Gerard?” Frank asks, before he does anything more.

“God I hope so,” Gerard says. Frank giggles at him, and goes back up to kissing him.

Frank’s never been comfortable with first times. He doesn’t really like first kisses, or first dates, or first anything really. This is no different. The fact that it’s Gerard, doesn’t make him any less nervous. In fact, it makes him more nervous. The last thing in the world Frank wants is to not be good enough, or to leave Gerard dissatisfied, because this is _Gerard_. Frank’s not had a very long life, but he’s fairly sure that Gerard is the love of his life anyway. He always will be, because he’s Gerard, so if he disappoints someone so important, he’ll never be able to sleep again.

“Frank you’re shaking,” Gerard notes when Frank makes a move to take off Gerard’s boxers.

“Just nervous,” Frank says.

“Do you want-”

“No I wanna do this, I’m just nervous. You’re Gerard, I don’t want to be bad or... or,” Frank stutters.

“Well it doesn’t matter how good you are, Frank. The fact that you’re you is what matters. Like I don’t want to be with anyone else besides you,” Gerard says.

“It’s been a really long time,” Frank says.

“I don’t care,” Gerard responds, “I’m still high on the fact that you let me kiss you. Besides Frank, there’s no way you’re not going to be fantastic.”

“But-”

Gerard cuts him off by kissing Frank, and holding the back of his neck so he can’t pull away. Gerard’s decided that if Frank is going to be nervous, then someone’s got to be confident or else they’ll just be a quivering mess of limbs, and that’s not going to do any good.

Frank is very definitely aware of Gerard’s boner pressing into his leg, and he’ll admit that he wants the underwear to go away, but he’s also anxious about the fact that that makes this real. He wants it to be real, but he doesn’t want to screw it up.

“Okay?” Gerard asks. Frank feels the tips of Gerard’s fingers at the hem of his own boxers, but he’s not really focused on that right now. He’s focused on not panicking.

“Alright,” Frank says, as some sort of answer. Gerard nods but looks at Frank with his eyes dead serious to make sure that Frank doesn’t change his mind. Eventually though, Frank does feel his last garment slide down his thighs to a point that allows him to kick them off altogether.

“Still good?” Gerard questions.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Frank says, but he’s trying to assure himself more than he is Gerard. He looks at Gerard and notices the staggering inequality of himself being naked while Gerard still hasn’t taken off his own underwear.

“But I have a dilemma of my own,” Frank says.

Gerard smiles at the mischievous little glimmer in Frank’s eyes at those words, “and what’s that I might ask?”

“You have more clothes than I do,” Frank says.

“Well we’ll have to fix that won’t we?”

“Yes we will,” Frank says. 

Frank’s feeling a little better about himself after he gets them both on equal grounds. Also, it doesn’t hurt that Gerard is grinding himself up against Frank, which is probably a crime because legality can’t feel so good.

“Hey Frank,” Gerard says animatedly.

“What?”

“You’re hot.”

“I know,” Frank shrugs, and Gerard giggles innocently before his hands do something not very innocent _at all_.

“Fuck,” Frank screeches because he’s caught off guard, and Gerard gets a cheeky smile on his face like he’d been hoping he’d get a reaction to that affect.

“Little fucker,” Frank gasps, and he takes a hold of Gerard’s cock which wipes the grin off of his face.

“Oh,” is all Gerard has to say, and suddenly, Frank sees his pupils go dark and engulf the light in his irises. Frank wonders if his had done the same thing, but he doesn’t have time to think about it because Gerard’s jacking him off pretty fast, and his brain is having a hard time keeping up.

“Whoa, oh god,” Frank tries to scramble for the words he needs. “Lube, I need... you need...”

Gerard doesn’t respond immediately, instead to taking to envelop Frank’s earlobe which causes him to moan into the quiet room.

“God,” Frank’s words tremble with his voice and he clamps his eyes shut, so that he doesn’t have to look at Gerard smirking at his effect on him. He’s not sure if Gerard would do that, but he’s embarrassed by the sound he just made.

“Drawer,” Gerard says gruffly into Frank’s ear, “Top one.”

Frank makes an attempt to nod, and he lifts his head far enough to see which drawer of which table he’s referring to. Frank reaches over, with his free hand, not giving up on Gerard’s length because if Gerard is allowed to make Frank feel like he’s coming undone, then Frank can do the same to him.

Frank’s hands are weak, and his grip is like a claw machine because he barely finds the strength in his finger tips to pick the bottle up from the inside of the drawer. He finally grabs it and slips it onto the bed when his hands, slippery with sweat, drop it.

Frank looks offhandedly at the lube for no particular reason and decides that he needs to fucking do this now, or his brain is going to explode. 

“I don’t wanna wait anymore, Gerard,” Frank says frantically, uncapping the bottle. Gerard lets go of him when Frank brings the lube into his plane of vision. Gerard nods at him, and he spreads his legs out underneath Frank to allow him some access.

“You ready?” Frank questions.

“Yes! Yes please, Frankie,” Gerard says with a hint of desperation gracing his voice which is slightly croaky.

Frank nods, thinking to himself that he’s starting to get over his initial anxiety, as it’s being replaced with excitement.

Frank makes quick work of preparing Gerard. He does just enough so as to make sure that he doesn’t hurt Gerard, but he’s probably a tad bit too rough. If so, Gerard doesn’t say, but mainly because he’s just as impatient as Frank.

Five years of waiting. Five years of dreaming. Five years of jerking off in the bathroom, and blushing to himself about it the next day. Five years of staring at Gerard across the room with the utmost longing. Five years of watching Batman with him, and watching Gerard smile at how shitty the jokes were. Five years has led up to this moment for Frank. Frank is finally here, and he would never have predicted it.

He’s wanted Gerard for so long, and at long last, Frank has got him.

When Frank pushes in, past a sensitive ring of muscles, it’s with a contented groan from Gerard. There’s pain, obviously there is, but mostly there’s a little voice inside his head saying ‘this is Frank.’ Frank, the guy who he’s in love with, but mostly Frank, his best friend in the entire world. Really that’s what Gerard cares most about. This is Frank, his best friend who he’s in love with.

Frank tries to keep in his moan when he enters Gerard, but he can’t keep it all back. Some of the noise leaks through and he closes his eyes to try to concentrate on making this last, but most importantly, making sure Gerard gets the bulk of the pleasure. If Frank could show him what Gerard means to him, he would, but he can’t. Not in the way he wants, so he’s going to try his damndest to translate the emotions in a way that Gerard will be able to understand. Also, Frank wants to make him fucking _scream_.

“Frank,” Gerard mewls, with his eyes fluttering up to meet Frank’s gaze. Frank’s got his hand on one of Gerard’s shoulders with the other on his waist. Gerard’s got both of his wrapped into Frank’s hair, losing sight of his fingers in the jet black hair.

“Good?” Frank asks, breathlessly.

“Yeah,” Gerard says hurriedly, and Frank nods to himself. It has been a while for both of them, but Gerard does not remember the burn being this good or the drag being that much better. He’s never felt so insatiably full or wanted in his whole life. Frank’s just trying not to melt or something, because he was not ready for how good Gerard’s body was going to feel around him.

Frank lets himself pull back a little bit and then back in, but it’s more instinct than anything else. He doesn’t really need to think about it, but he knows to be slow so that he doesn’t hurt Gerard. 

Gerard’s not overly talkative, nor is he all that intelligible. There’s really no other way of describing it other than the sound of being fucked. His voice is a little higher than it usually is, with a somewhat feminine pitch coating the moans, but it’s turning Frank on all the more.

“Frankie,” is one of the only words Frank manages to hear before he hears, what he’s decided is his new favorite word, “faster.”

Frank, of course, complies. His pace quickens, and it adds to the quietness in the room. There’s no silence anymore as that was taken away by Frank’s heavy breathing, Gerard’s almost endless series of moans, and the slip-slide of skin against skin.

Frank doesn’t think he’s ever going to hear anything as glorious as the sound Gerard makes when he finds Gerard’s prostate. It’s the sound of perfection, no other words can describe it. Frank decides that he’s never going to stop wanting to hear that again.

At this revelation, his thrusts become more orientated on finding that spot again and again, and not giving Gerard a break from the feeling of Frank fucking him madly. And he is, oh he is. He’s lost any shadow of nerves, having been replaced by the spotlessness of euphoria.

Along his string of inarticulate sounds, comes the very distinct noise of Gerard saying “yes” over and over.

It’s only a matter of time, because no good thing can last forever. Frank knows that Gerard is getting close when he reaches a hand between the two of them and starts to touch himself, about as furiously fast as Frank pounds into him. Frank brushes Gerard’s hand away, because there is no way he’s going to let Gerard cum by any hand that is not his own. 

With the lack of a place for his hands, they return to Frank’s hair, and Gerard begins tugging on it brainlessly. Under different circumstances, Frank would find it unwelcome, but right now, the way Gerard’s tugging him closer and closer to his body is one of the best sensations in the world. He’s pulling Frank closer to a point where Gerard’s moaning into Frank’s mouth against his. Frank is trying furiously to kiss Gerard, but his brain is finding it too hard to multitask, so he just rests the bridge of his nose against Gerard’s. 

He looks at Gerard’s eyes, open, but fluttering closed every second or two whenever Frank’s thrust hits his prostate dead on.

Frank’s imagined Gerard cumming a million times before, but he never set himself up for what it would actually be like. Honestly, Frank thought that Gerard would be kind of loud, or kind of restless, but he’s not. He gets really quiet, and his body stills almost completely. There’s just this calm that washes over him and all of a sudden, Gerard’s grip on Frank’s hair mellows out little bit. Frank looks up to look at Gerard whose eyes are closed and mouth open only barely.

Frank almost feels like he’s intruding on a really private moment, but he’s too entranced to look away, because Gerard looks gorgeous. If Frank thought Gerard was attractive before, than he feels his stomach lurch at how wrong he was, because _this_ isn’t done justice by a word so measly as ‘attractive’.

“God, fuck. I can’t,” Frank whimpers shaking his head, and his climax comes a moment later with more noise than Gerard’s, as he lets out a long gasp and a semblance of Gerard’s name. Frank’s forehead falls down to rest on Gerard’s neck as he cums, still inside Gerard, and he gasps, as if scrambling for air that isn’t filling his lungs properly.

Frank isn’t exactly aware of his surrounding at this point in time, but he does feel Gerard’s hand by the back of his head, next to his ear. He’s just sort of keeping Frank there, keeping him calm. It’s such a small gesture, but Frank is really relieved by it even though he doesn’t know why.

“Frankie?” Gerard says softly, and Frank shudders a few times before looking up at Gerard. He’s feeling exhausted all of a sudden, but when he looks up he feels a million times better. He sees the sweat matted hair stuck to the top of Gerard’s forehead, and the look in his eyes that really shouldn’t look so innocent all things considering. He does look innocent though, hazel eyes sparkling almost worriedly.

Frank smiles at him feeling unbelievably content. Gerard looks back at him, biting his lip like he’s thinking deeply about something.

“C’mere Frankie.”

Frank nods slightly and pulls his face to meet Gerard’s. Their noses brush ever so slightly until their lips meet but only barely. They barely touch before Frank is rolling off of Gerard and onto his side so that he can look directly at him. Gerard turns to look back and he smiles again, that goofy one with all his teeth showing.

“I’m sorry that I made you wait for so long,” Gerard says, “but I’m going to make sure you know that it was my fault.”

“Nah, s’okay. I didn’t mind the wait that much, because this, what I get here, this is worth it. I’d say that it’s been worth waiting for this end, but this isn’t really an end at all, is it?” Frank says. “I could’ve waited forever, but I’m glad I don’t have to.”

Gerard smiles at him, and Frank’s finding it hard to imagine Gerard as anything but as this beautiful angel, for lack of a better word. He can’t find anything that sounds as accurate as that. Gerard is everything Frank wants in life, everything Frank wants ever, and he’s waited so long to finally be able to say he’s got him. _Finally_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I wrote porn! Oh how proud my mom will be.


	28. Gerard Wants a Pony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They decide to totally mess with Patrick and Pete.

“Morning,” Frank mumbles against Gerard’s shoulder. Gerard opens one of his eyes to look at Frank, who’s still essentially asleep aside from the way he’s trying to get his eyes to open. They’re fluttering open and closed like he’s willing his body to open his eyes, but it’s protesting. Gerard isn’t sure if he’s awake or not. He feels like he’s mostly still asleep but also awake, and it’s not a comfortable state to be in, because he still mostly wants to be asleep.

“I’m sleepy,” Gerard replies.

“Me too,” Frank says, and he gives up on trying to open his eyes. He instead decides to just cozy up closer to Gerard, and Gerard’s fairly sure he’s fallen back asleep.

“Frank?” Gerard asks, but Frank just groans and his head turns to face the opposite direction on the pillow.

“Morning to you too,” Gerard grins and then pulls Frank closer, because he’s really warm and perfect. Gerard thinks, even though he’s painfully tired and his bones are aching to get back to sleep, that he’s really happy, because this is Frank. He got to wake up next to Frank.

He actually wakes up next to Frank again a few hours later at a more agreeable time. It’s still the morning, but it’s late, almost noon.

“Hi Gerard,” Frank says fondly when he looks over at Gerard who’s hair looks like a spool of yarn you find in your grandmothers old sewing kit that hasn’t been touched in several dozen years.

“Hi,” He says back, and he only opens his eyes at the sound of Frank’s voice.

“This is a really good way to wake up,” Frank notes, and he sticks his head into the corner of Gerard’s neck.

“Yeah,” Gerard replies groggily.

“We’re finally together though,” Frank says, and when he says it his heart swells at how ecstatic that fact makes him. He never thought he’d be with Gerard, but here he is. 

“Mhm,” Gerard says, “my boyfriend is hot.”

Frank croons, “Is that what I am then?”

“Is that okay?”

Frank looks up at Gerard and his big brown eyes meet Gerard’s, “it’s definitely okay. It’s better than okay. It’s amazing.”

“Good,” Gerard says.

“My boyfriend is hot too, but his morning breath is abysmal,” Frank says looking serious and also sweet at the same time. Gerard finds himself not being offended by the insult because it’s hard to feel hurt when someone so pretty says it.

“So is yours,” Gerard says.

“Yeah,” Frank frowns, and he leans down to kiss Gerard anyway.

“Gross.”

“Yeah,” Frank replies, but he doesn’t stop kissing Gerard. 

~*~*~*~

A few hours later, a shower, a meal, and another shower preceded by some fucking, and Frank finds himself in the kitchen. He’s looking at Gerard who’s trying to read something in the newspaper, but he keeps getting distracted by Frank looking at him.

“What are you looking at?” Gerard asks, looking down at the paper, and trying to avoid eye contact with Frank.

“I’m looking at my boyfriend who’s really attractive, and needs to start kissing me before I get really sad.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.”

“Let me finish this, okay?” Gerard asks.

“No,” Frank replies, and he leans over the counter to pull the paper away. 

“That wasn’t very nice of you,” Gerard states.

“No it wasn’t,” Frank agrees.

Gerard doesn’t resist when Frank starts kissing him from over the counter. Frank’s not very tall, and he probably couldn’t even reach if Gerard hadn’t leaned into it, but obviously he was going to lean in.

“You know what we need to do?” Frank asks.

“I can think of a lot of things we need to do,” Gerard replies.

“Oh fuck off, that’s not what I meant,” Frank says shaking his head at Gerard, “no, we need to freak the fuck out of Pete and Patrick.”

“We need to what?”

“We should tell them that we hate each other or something, and that I’m moving out just to see them get all pale and terrified!”

“You are a sadist aren’t you?” Gerard says, shaking his head. “Well you’re going to have to be the one to do it, because, in case you don’t remember, I have a hickey.”

“But it’s a very very cute hickey,” Frank says smiling. Frank goes back to stand on the other side of the counter looking proud of himself.

“Yeah whatever, I have work on Monday you know,” Gerard rolls his eyes at Frank, and rubs at his neck.

“Well then everyone there will know that you got lucky, and you can tell anyone who asks that you slept with the hottest guy on the planet,” Frank replies.

“I don’t recall ever sleeping with David Bowie.”

“David Bowie is like 70.”

“I’d still tap that,” Gerard shrugs.

“I hate you.”

“I know,” Gerard smiles back at him, and he walks over to Frank who’s still beaming from the fact that he actually is with Gerard.

“I love you a lot, Frank,” Gerard says and Frank looks up at him. For Frank, kissing Gerard has become like a second nature already, because he’s just so happy that he gets to do it. He never thought he’d kiss Gerard, so the fact that he does get to has made every time their lips touch more special than anything in the world.

Someone knocks on the door and then Frank throws Gerard off of him.

“Oh it’s show time!” Frank says dramatically.

“What do I-”

“Just put your hand on your neck, dumbass,” Frank says, and Gerard frowns. He sighs and leans himself against the counter, and puts his hand on his neck as casually as he can.

“Look grim! I’m moving out asshole,” Frank says.

“Sorry? I’m in a good mood, I can’t help it,” Gerard says.

“Because I fucked you last night? And then again last night? And then a little bit this morning.”

“No because it’s a cloudless day and the sun is shining,” Gerard responds sarcastically.

“Frank we can hear you, we know you’re home, open the goddamn door,” Pete says from the opposite side of the door.

“You can give me a minute to get to the door can’t you?” Frank yells back.

“You are a horrible person,” Gerard shakes his head.

“Okay, Gerard. Look sad. Let’s make them sweat,” Frank says. Frank gets a devilish glimmer in his eye before he walks over to the door and puts a somber look on his face.

When he opens the door, Patrick and Pete are standing there, Patrick looking anxious, and Pete looking like he’s really craving potato chips.

“Hey guys,” Patrick says anxiously and he looks at Gerard first before he even lays eyes on Frank. Patrick walks over to him, noticing Gerard’s expression and he looks like he’s trying to analyze the expression.

“Please tell me you have Oreos or something, because we ran out and I’m hungry,” Pete says, without noticing either of them.

“All you think about is food,” Frank says.

“Food doesn’t argue with you, it’s just there to make your stomach happy,” Pete replies, sticking his head in the refrigerator.

“We need to talk about you two though,” Patrick says, looking from Frank to Gerard nervously. Frank feels happy with himself that they’re pulling the charade off, at least with Patrick. Pete is more interested in a box of poptarts. Patrick looks already concerned about the two of them though.

“So what’s up with you two, and why does Gerard look like he just drank rotten milk?” Patrick asks.

“Yeah, about that,” Frank says sighing.

“That’s not a good way to start a sentence,” Pete says looking over, because something has caught his attention that isn’t covered in sugar, which is a first. Pete is always hungry in the morning. He’s like a vacuum cleaner.

“Yeah, we’ve made a decision as to what’s going to happen between us,” Frank says.

“And what was that decision? Please tell me it didn’t involve you two yelling at each other,” Patrick says.

“Oh no, we yelled at each other,” Frank nods, “we yelled at each other a lot last night.”

“There was a lot of yelling. Massive amounts of it. Really really loud,” Gerard confirms.

“Yeah quite a bit too,” Frank says, “more than once.”

“A few times actually. We just kept yelling at each other all last night.”

“And a little bit this morning,” Frank says, “there’s just been a lot of yelling.”

“Yeah, you just said so. Repeatedly.” Patrick replies, looking at the two of them, still utterly confused.

“I mean, I’m not sure if yelling is necessarily the right word though?” Frank says.

“No. Maybe, like ‘screaming’? I don’t know. Loud noises though, that’s for sure,” Gerard says, looking at Frank expressionlessly.

“Oh yeah, that’s a definite. Lots of that going on. Gerard and I just, well, we’ve been discussing this living situation thoroughly and we think we’ve decided what has to be done,” Frank says, trying to look glum.

“Oh god,” Patrick says, and Pete seems to be paying attention now too, but that doesn’t mean he’s not trying to steal a packet of poptarts by stuffing them into his sleeve. He seems to think that they can’t see him, but Pete does not make a good thief at all.

“I’ve decided that I’m going to be moving out,” Frank says bluntly.

“You’re what?” Patrick asks, looking even paler than normal, so he looks like he needs to be rushed to a hospital, because the boy already has the same skin tone as Casper the ghost.

“Yeah, it was a tough decision, but it’s just not going to work out with Frank living in the room next door,” Gerard says and he looks down at the counter.

“But I... but we talked about this yesterday Frank, and you seemed like you were going to...” Patrick starts and then makes a bleating noise like an angry goat.

“Well, see logistically, it just wasn’t going to work out,” Gerard says, “so we talked it over, and yeah, Frank isn’t going to be living in that room over there anymore.”

“But what about, like, Friday movie nights and stuff? It’s going to be so hard to still all be friends if Frank doesn’t live here!” Pete says, “And who am I going to have long discussions about dinosaurs with, if Frank is gone?”

“You can have a conversation about dinosaurs with anyone. Patrick for example,” Frank says.

“But Patrick doesn’t like Jurassic Park, and I’ve been meaning to break up with him because of that. Who doesn’t like Jurassic Park? That’s like not liking garlic bread. Everyone likes garlic bread,” Pete says.

“It’s just a movie,” Patrick rolls his eyes.

“It’s a book too!” Frank points out.

“Right, sorry. It’s a book and a movie, but it’s not like it’s a human obligation to like them.”

“Do you see what I have to put up with?” Pete asks looking incredulous, “you two have got it made, you can’t let Aaron pull you apart. Frank, you can’t!”

“Pete, don’t tell them what to do,” Patrick warns him.

“But they’re making the wrong decision!”

“Yes, well I know that, and you know that, but that doesn’t mean they’re not complete idiots,” Patrick says.

“We are still here you know,” Frank interrupts, "I can hear you.”

“Well you are an idiot!” Patrick says to him.

“Yeah! You’re in love with Gerard! Everyone knows that, even Gerard knows that, you should be with each other!” Pete shouts, “You can’t move in with fucking Aaron-”

“Who said I’m moving in with Aaron?” Frank asks.

“What?”

“Well I never said I was moving in with Aaron, I just said I’m moving out,” Frank corrects.

Patrick groans and shakes his head, “Oh great, well that’s not that much better. You won’t be living here anymore, and-”

“No, he’s still going to live here,” Gerard says.

“What?” Pete asks, looking really confused now. It’s the same face he gets when he tries to solve a Sudoku. 

“Frank isn’t going to be living in that room over there anymore,” Gerard repeats, and he points to Frank’s door, “but he’s still going to live in this apartment.”

“So, wait, where’s Frank going to live?” Patrick asks.

“Over there,” Frank points to Gerard’s room. “It’s a shorter commute for me if I just live in the same place as my boyfriend.”

“Your boyfriend...?” Pete asks, like he’s still muddled. The poor guy could get lost at sea while still tied to the dock.

“You guys are awful,” Patrick says and his head falls against the counter like he’s given up on life. “You terrified me, you stupid jerks.”

Patrick obviously gets it a little quicker than Pete, but then understanding flashes across his face, and he looks at them with a shake of the head. Gerard just grins back at Pete’s glare and grabs ahold of Frank’s hand.

“You two are literally the worst though,” Patrick mumbles, only picking his head up a few moments later. “Like I couldn’t even imagine how sad Gerard was going to be, but then you two were just playing a trick on us, and I hate you.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Frank shrugs, “it was too fun to pass up.”

“I’m stealing the rest of your poptarts,” Pete shakes his head, “that was low. Very low.”

“Pete, you steal all of our food anyway,” Frank tells him.

“Aren’t you two going to congratulate us for finally getting together or something? I was expecting fanfare and fireworks, or maybe a pony and a balloon artist,” Frank says.

“There should totally be a pony here, you’re right,” Gerard says, “I want a pony. We need to find ourselves a very small horse to celebrate the fact that you and I are together.”

“If you want a pony, I’ll get you a pony,” Frank says, looking at Gerard.

“Oh god, they’re disgusting,” Pete says looking at Patrick, “we don’t act like that, do we? Please tell me we don’t act like that, I could never live with myself. If I was that annoying and gushy, I’d need a punch a wall to snap myself out of it.”

“No we’re not like that, but mostly because you’re an idiot,” Patrick says. “And I’m not going to congratulate you two. You should’ve been together five years ago.”

“But we’re together now!” Frank says, “And that’s what matters, right?”

Patrick looks to be in deep concentration, and then he has some sort of epiphany and makes a face.

“Oh, so you two were ‘yelling’ all night,” Patrick says, and he scrunches up his nose in disgust. He looks over at Pete who also seems to get it, and he’s making a face like he’s a pubescent teenager hearing a dirty joke.

Pete snorts, “Oh my god. You two made macaroni art.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment?


	29. Gerard and Frank are Adorable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's so fluffy, I'm gonna die!

“Are we going to tell Mikey or wait for him to just figure it out?” Frank asks.

He’s lying next to Gerard in bed, and mostly he’s just trying to talk himself into sleep, because today’s probably been the best day of his life and he wants to end it on a high note. Today was his and Gerard’s first whole day as a real couple, and it felt fantastic. In more ways than one. Mostly emotionally, but physically it didn’t feel bad either.

“He’ll figure it out sooner or later. He’s stupid, and I hate him, but he’s not _that_ stupid,” Gerard says.

“Well alright,” Frank says, “You know I have to find a job.”

“I blame Aaron for you getting fired,” Gerard says.

“Of course you do.”

“I hate him.”

“So I’ve heard,” Frank says.

“Do you _not_ hate him? Seriously? He threw a bowl at your face.”

“I remember what happened. I just, I guess, I was really surprised by what he did. It didn’t seem like him. I don’t exactly like him looking back on it, but I still haven’t figured out who the hell he actually was.”

“He was a dick,” Gerard says.

Frank nods, and looks at Gerard, curling into him a little more, “he was. He was a charming asshole.”

“Emphasis on the asshole,” Gerard says.

“You know, Gerard. I’m content with my decision. I like you miles more than I ever liked Aaron. I feel way different about you than I did about him, and I always have. I don’t want you to insult the person he was though. Before the incident, he was still a good person. I still liked him. I guess he was just massively jealous, and I never saw it. I wish I had, because then I wouldn’t have wasted as much time as I did swooning over him instead of you. Maybe we could’ve had a little bit more time together, but still, I don’t regret knowing him.”

“I hated him,” Gerard says, “I’m not going to be like him, you know.”

“I know.”

“I can’t take you to fancy restaurants, or buy you expensive presents. I can’t show you off to all my rich friends and make them jealous of how hot my boyfriend is, because all my friends are your friends too. I can’t be this debonair, button-down businessmen,” Gerard says.

“I know. I wouldn’t want you to be. I want the guy who eats pizza on Friday’s and has a cubicle job that barely pays a legal wage. I want the guy who already knows all of my friends,” Frank says, “the fact is that I don’t care about how much money you have, I just like you.”

Gerard smiles and squeezes Frank with the arm he has around his back. He’s come to the conclusion that Frank is the best cuddler in the world, and there’s no one better than him. He’s warm, but not way too warm, and he smells really nice. Also he seems to just fit really well against Gerard’s body like memory foam.

“I’m just glad that you got away from Aaron before he could do more than just throw a bowl at you,” Gerard says. 

“Well, he probably would’ve done more, but I am faster than him. Also Aaron has the worst fucking aim ever. I think I saw him throw a million things onto the floor that he’d been trying to get into the garbage. Not very good at it.”

“Well I’m fantastic at darts,” Gerard says.

Frank snorts and looks at Gerard judgingly, “you’re so dumb.”

“I know,” Gerard says, “but I bet I can beat you at darts.”

“I can beat you at checkers.”

“Well maybe we need to test that out and see if we’re both right,” Gerard says, “but that’s for another time. I’m sleepy now.”

“You’re cute when you’re sleepy,” Frank says turning his head to look at Gerard, who looks really sweet and calm when he’s tired. Frank’s always liked that look on him admittedly. He likes Gerard’s small little yawns, and the way his eyelids get heavy like he’s a little kitten.

“Today was a really good day,” Frank states, as he puts his head in the corner between Gerard’s shoulder and the pillow.

“No today was a major loss. Pete really did steal our poptarts,” Gerard says. “But we did make some macaroni art.”

“What does that even mean?” Frank asks. “Like, I assume fucking, but why on earth is that the innuendo Pete went with?”

“It’s Pete we’re talking about.”

Frank nods and sighs, “Explanation enough.”

“Why do we hang out with Pete?” Gerard asks, and Frank can tell he’s already drifting off.

“Because we like Patrick and Patrick probably wouldn’t hang out with us if we didn’t invite Pete. Also, he’s the easiest one to blame things on, and the victim of most joke punchlines.” 

“That’s why,” Gerard says softly.

When Frank wakes up, Gerard is drooling a little bit on the pillow. It’s kind of cute, and also makes him look like an idiot, which is fitting. Frank looks down at him for a few minutes before giggling to himself and poking Gerard in the temple to wake him up. He groans first and tries to push Frank away, but Frank pokes him again and waits. He watches Gerard’s eyes flicker open and waits for him to look up.

“It’s Monday. You’ve gotta go to work,” Frank says, and Gerard groans.

“No I don’t,” he says and pulls the covers up to hide his face.

“Hiding from the big bad work thing doesn’t make it go away,” Frank chides, and Gerard makes a small noise. He peaks his eyes up from under the blanket and looks up at Frank with his pretty eyes meeting Frank’s. Frank’s heart stops a little bit, because holy fuck that’s adorable. He wishes he had a camera to take a picture of how cute Gerard is right now. 

“Come on, Gerard,” Frank says, and he tries to tug Gerard’s arm out of his blanket cocoon, but he pulls Frank back. Gerard’s pull is a little stronger, so Frank ends up with his torso on top of Gerard’s. He looks down at Gerard, who Frank has come to the conclusion, always has messy hair when he wakes up. His elbows are on Gerard’s chest, and he’s worried that he’s putting too much weight onto him, but Gerard doesn’t even seem to notice.

“You did that on purpose,” Frank says, smiling.

“Yep,” Gerard replies, before pulling his hand out and putting it on the back of Frank’s head to push him downward. He also pulls his head up a little bit to meet Frank so that he can kiss him. Frank lets it happen, even though, yeah, morning breath is a bitch, and he still doesn’t like it very much. Though really, it’s Gerard so he’s glad to be kissing the guy at all.

“Frank, I can’t go to work today,” he makes a fake cough, “I’m sick.”

“Boo, you whore.”

“Oh god we really are disgusting,” Gerard says cringing, “don’t tell Pete what just happened.”

Frank laughs at the look on his face, which also deserves to be immortalized by a picture. Gerard’s very good at making faces, and Frank’s kind of surprised that he never noticed that. 

“I hadn’t planned on it,” Frank says, “maybe we should not tell him about what’s going to happen now.”

“Why whaa-” Gerard’s cut off when Frank starts kissing his neck, and his eyes bulge out a little bit, because he just woke up. He just woke up and Frank is perfect and there’s something sexy about quoting Mean Girls.

“Hold on a sec,” Gerard says, pushing Frank back. He reaches over to the nightstand and grabs his phone. Frank makes a moping face before Gerard presses a few buttons and then dials someone.

“Hi, I’m, uh, unable to come into work today because I’ve got, uh,” Gerard is getting distracted by the dirty look in Frank’s eyes and he scrambles for something, “just sick and all that.”

~*~*~*~

“Geraaaaaard,” Frank says stringing his name out, because he’s trying to focus. Gerard is making it hard to focus because he’s far too sexy for one thing, and for another, he keeps nibbling on Frank’s ear.

“What?” Gerard asks, like he doesn’t know what he’s doing to Frank when obviously he does.

“I have to get a fucking job, Gerard. You’re distracting me,” Frank says with an angry tone, though he’s not actually angry.

“Aw, I’m sorry,” Gerard says, “do you want me to stop?”

Frank reaches an impasse there, because obviously he doesn’t want Gerard to stop. He has a brain, obviously he doesn’t want Gerard to stop, but at the same time, he also does want to go about finding a place to work soon, so he doesn’t feel so useless just sitting at home.

“Ugh, no, I don’t want you to stop,” Frank says, and then whispers, “jackass.”

Gerard smiles at him, and Frank rolls his eyes. Gerard’s pressed against the headrest of the couch while Frank is sitting between his legs with his back to Gerard. He’s got his computer on his knees, adjusting his résumé, which is severely outdated.

“I can’t help it,” Gerard says, “You’re cute.”

“Yeah, well,” Frank says absently, “when I finish this, then we can, well...”

“We’re going to need macaroni, some glitter glue, and construction paper.”

Franks snorts and looks at Gerard whose head is practically on Frank’s shoulder now, “are you going to make a picture for Pete to hang on his refrigerator?”

“Among other things,” Gerard says.

“You know, Gerard, it’s really hard to sound dirty when you’re talking about a craft traditionally made by six year olds in preschool,” Frank says.

“Who says I was talking about sex?” Gerard asks. “Maybe I just really want to make macaroni art.”

“Yeah?” Frank asks.

“Yep,” Gerard nods.

“Well we don’t have any glitter glue so you’re going to have to go out to get some,” Frank says, “and also poptarts, cookies, and Kit Kats.”

“Anything else, your majesty?”

“I need a dinosaur named Winston,” Frank says.

“That’s a curious shopping list,” Gerard says.

“Well hop to it then,” Frank says, and pushes Gerard off the couch so that he falls onto the floor.

“That wasn’t very nice of you,” Gerard says, looking up at Frank with a frown.

“No, but it was hilarious.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's right. Despicable Me and Mean Girls references both in the same chapter. You're welcome.


	30. Frank Has a Problematic Ex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Aaron's a dick.

“Gerard, we need to talk,” Frank says as a greeting when he walks into the apartment.

“That is not a good tone, not a good way to start a sentence, and the look on your face is not good either,” Gerard says, “I am officially terrified of what you’re about to say.”

“God, Gerard,” Frank says rolling his eyes, “okay, no it’s not about us. You have me now, I’ll make you that promise. We’re together, deal with it. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Well then what [i]is this about? Something is wrong, I know that for sure, but what?”

“Well it’s about Aaron,” Frank says.

Gerard pauses for a long minute, because it’s been two weeks since they last talked about Aaron. He hasn’t been brought up in conversation at all in half a month, but now Frank is looking really pissed off and he’s brought up that name again. Gerard still hates the name Aaron, and even more than that, he hates the person who that name belongs to.

“What about him?”

“He’s ruining my life,” Frank says without explanation. Frank throws off his coat, he doesn’t bother to hang it up anywhere, he just leaves it on the kitchen stool. That’s Gerard’s first signal that something is definitely wrong, because usually, Frank would hang the coat up. He’s somewhat of a neat freak, he’s not obsessive about it but it’s still true about him. He doesn’t just leave things lying around if he can put them in the correct spot, and that’s why Gerard is confused.

“Okay, so I’m not following,” Gerard says. Frank is walking past Gerard who’s sitting on the couch, and he doesn’t even bother to look at him before he’s going in to their room, pulling his tie off from around his neck.

“He’s ruining my life, plain and simple,” Frank calls, from the room, where he’s assumingly changing out of his interview garb. Aaron, having gotten Frank fired, has forced him to also look for a new job which is all he’s been doing for the past two weeks. Well that and Gerard. He’s been doing job interviews and Gerard.

“So I got that part where you said he’s ruining your life, but would you explain how? I got the what, and I’m pretty sure I’m familiar with the why and who, but it’s the how I need help with,” Gerard says.

Frank groans, and then he walks back into the living room. His hair is all askew from where he pulled a shirt up over it, and he’s wearing a sweatshirt that’s way too big for him which means it’s probably Gerard’s. He doesn’t look like he’s having the greatest day, and Gerard was going to ask how his interview went but the look on his face explains it well enough.

“He’s blackballing me,” Frank states, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. He’s looking at Gerard, waiting for him to understand and give out his sympathy, but Gerard has no idea what he means.

“He’s what?”

“He’s ruining my life, Gerard! He’s not going to let me breakup with him without making me regret it and he’s doing that by making me unhireable.” 

“That’s not a word,” Gerard says.

“No? Well whatever. No one in this city will hire me, and you want to know why? Aaron. That’s why.”

“So, he’s doing this how?” Gerard asks

“Hell if I know, but he is, I’m sure of it, okay? I have applied for like, what, thirty different jobs, gone on six interviews and every single one of them got a phone call right in the middle of it where they told me that they no longer need to speak with me. Aaron is calling these people and he’s badmouthing me! I don’t know how the fuck he’s doing it, but who else would have a grudge against me? Also, I heard the interview guy say his name, but that’s beside the point. Aaron is making sure that no one in this whole godforsaken city will hire me!”

“Whoa, okay, so slow down. Firstly, how on earth is he calling these people? How does he know when you have interviews?”

“Like I said, the guy knows people. He’s rich, he has his ways,” Frank says.

“I thought you kept saying he wasn’t rich. Something like ‘not rich, just high middle class,’” Gerard paraphrases.

“I was being modest. He’s hella rich. That’s not the point though, this could ruin my fucking life, Gerard!”

“But if you didn’t list him as a source or a former employer than why would they even listen to him? Why would they care what Aaron says?”

“Because he’s rich and charitable and perfect and handsome and a fucking douchebag, but I’m the only person who seems to see that,” Frank yells. He’s getting angry and riled up, not at Gerard, just at the fact that any of this is happening at all.

“So wait, they’re just taking his word because of the fact that he’s rich?”

“And everyone thinks he’s this respectable guy too! Like he’s a really good person, who’s fantastic at spelling things correctly, and saved people from burning buildings, and built a school in a poor part of Africa. Just because of that it makes him the go to guy on who to hire and who not to hire?” Frank says exasperatedly, “I mean come the fuck on, this is ridiculous! I just want a job, I’m not asking to be sent away! I didn’t fucking do anything, but how do you explain to your potential employer that your ex-boyfriend is ostracizing you because of the fact that you were kind enough not to cheat on him?”

“Frank, I mean, there’s got to be something you can do, or say,” Gerard says.

“What? Just tell these interviewers, ‘hey so first of all I’m gay as fuck and my ex is this really wealthy guy that donates to people in need a lot, but also he’s a dick, and threw a bowl at me.’ Gerard, for one thing, who’s going to believe that a guy who worked a dead end job in a diner dated a guy on the most eligible bachelors list of 2013-”

“Seriously?”

“Yes! He’s a catch! Or at least I thought he was before he threw shit at me and got me fired, and tried to turn my friends against me,” Frank says, “god, just saying all this, how did I ever date that man? He’s a bitch! I can’t believe him.”

“It was always really subtle,” Gerard shrugs, “but if you’d given it time I think you’d have come across a lot worse than just isolation and bowl throwing.”

“Oh god, fuck, so you think this guy’s abusive as well,” Frank yells, “why do people listen to him? He’s a scary ass motherfucker, and yeah, I know he’s attractive, and he’s got a stupidly bright toothpaste commercial smile, but he’s also a jackass!”

“You’re preaching to the choir, Frank.”

“Why does he have so much power? Why does he get to ruin my life? I did what was right! I broke up with him so that I wouldn’t end up cheating. I broke up because I wasn’t in love with him, and didn’t think I could ever be. That’s a reasonable motive to breakup! What did he want from me? Did he want me to just stay with him until we got married where I wouldn’t like him anyway and eventually end up an old housewife who hires a hit man to put a couple of staples in his neck?”

“That’s an oddly specific choice of assassination,” Gerard says.

“Well if he’s going to go down, I want him to go down painfully,” Frank says, with crazy looking eyes, “oh fucking hell, I should have just pulled him in front of that bus the day we met and let him get run over.”

“But then we wouldn’t be together,” Gerard frowns.

“Fair point,” Frank says, “oh man, I should’ve pushed him off the fire escape at his apartment when I had the chance.”

“Frank,” Gerard says, looking actually kind of serious, “I have had my fair share of fantasies about how I was going to kill Aaron before. When I say that, I’m not kidding, I could write a book, but my point is that, he’s actively trying to ruin your life, and reputation. He’s doing that simply because of [i]us. Because [i]we’re together not you and him. That’s not okay.”

“I know! What do you think I’ve been ranting about for the past five minutes for? He’s an asshole and I hate him, and he’s going to try to ruin my life. Why? What I did wasn’t that bad, it could’ve been worse,” Frank says.

“But he doesn’t understand that, so now we have to figure out what we’re going to do about this,” Gerard says.

“Well my first thought was to go and talk to him, but then I decided that that’s the route a person who wants to end up on an episode of CSI, or NCIS, or that one with Nathan Fillion would do,” Frank says.

“You know what, usually I’d say you’re being paranoid, but Aaron scares the shit out of me so you might actually end up in a pit in his basement if you go talk to him.”

“Right! Like that boy could be an extra in The Walking Dead and he’d steal the damn show. Have you ever noticed how undead his eyes look? I thought it was kind of pretty at first, but you look into them long enough and you see Satan laughing at you. Fuck, what did I get myself into? Aaron is creepy!”

“He’s creepy and he’s rich and he’s trying to hurt you which is not okay,” Gerard says.

Frank groans and then collapses on the couch with a resounding growl. He practically lies down until he’s using Gerard’s knees as a pillow, and he looks up looking really adorable and also really unsettled.

“I don’t know what to do, Gerard,” Frank whimpers. “I need a job, but I also am a nobody who’s being victimized by a somebody. How can I compete with that?”

“I don’t know, Frankie, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry this is happening to you, it shouldn’t be, you’re too good a person,” Gerard says looking down at him, wishing he could do anything. He wishes he could switch places with Frank so that Frank didn’t have to be the one feeling miserable by Aaron.

“Right? Like, I pay my taxes, I don’t litter, I don’t eat meat, I hold doors open for people. I’m not that bad! I once cheated on a test, but that was like twelve years ago and no one gives a flying fuck about the Dewey decimal system, okay? Not even librarians care for that shit.”

“Frank, we’ll figure something out, okay? We’ll figure something out and we’ll show Aaron what a prick he is, and maybe while we’re at it, we’ll make him jealous because of the fact that he doesn’t have a boyfriend as attractive, funny, sweet and adorable as mine,” Gerard says, playing with Frank’s hair mindlessly.

Frank huffs and looks at the ceiling like he’s mad at it, “you know what my dream is? Someday I want to knee Aaron in the balls really really hard.”

“That’s a good dream,” Gerard nods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment?


	31. Gerard Calls Aaron Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When did this fic get so long?

Gerard knows he really shouldn’t do this. He knows Frank’s probably going to yell at him, or get really angry, but Gerard has no choice. He just doesn’t.

What Aaron is doing is not okay. He’s trying to ruin Frank’s life, all just because he wasn’t in love with Aaron and never was. That’s not his fault. That’s not Frank’s fault, or Aaron’s fault, or Gerard’s fault, or... well no it might be kind of Gerard’s fault. He should probably take some blame for that one.

Still, Aaron is disrespecting the man that Gerard loves, and hell if Gerard is just going to put up with that like it’s no big deal. He needs to have some words with the evil Frenchman and speak his mind. He does have to remind himself that Aaron knows where they live, but he’ll cross that bridge if he comes to it.

Early in the morning, Gerard wakes up and looks over at Frank. He reaches over to the bedside table and grabs Frank’s phone. He quickly scrolls through the contacts and then copies Aaron’s number into his own phone. Gerard’s not exactly surprised that Frank forgot to delete the number, but he’ll remind Frank to do that soon. Part of him is kind of relieved that the name is still there, while the rest of him is trying to convince himself not to be jealous.

Obviously Frank doesn’t like Aaron anymore. Gerard knows that. He knows that with some amount of certainty, but he just doesn’t like that he still has the number. It bothers him. He knows it shouldn’t, but he can’t exactly force that thought to go away when it’s there.

Gerard sighs, looking down at Frank, wishing he could stay. He wants to stay to see Frank wake up and be all cute with his stupidly bleary morning eyes and his cute little yawns, but he does have to go to work. One day calling sick is enough, two probably isn’t going to do him any favors. 

He probably wouldn’t land himself in the same position as Frank, because in all likelihood, Aaron doesn’t know much more about him than his first name, but he can’t disqualify that as a possibility. Aaron is rich. He has his ways, and he could find out probably everything about Gerard there is to know. He could find out about that one time when Gerard was a kid and got suspended for pushing a kid out of a tree. That wasn’t really Gerard’s fault though, the kid who he pushed out of a tree was picking on Mikey. He brought it upon himself.

Gerard pulls himself out of bed, careful not to wake Frank. Frank is really cute when he sleeps and Gerard hates that. It makes him want to just stay there and watch him for hours, but he doesn’t get to do that, because he has work and it would be ‘creepy’ or ‘verging on stalkerish.’ Mikey’s words, not his.

Not surprisingly, Mikey’s first response to finding out about Gerard and Frank was verging on apathetic. He looked like he already knew it was happening. He does have some aspect of clairvoyance to him that has always kind of freaked people out.

Mikey’s only words on the matter when they told him were, “took you two long enough.” Frank was kind of upset because he was kind of enjoying the shocked expressions he kept getting from people. Frank gets excited by really little things, and Gerard’s always known that, but never did he imagine he would fall in love with Frank a million times more every time he makes that excited face. Gerard once thought his heart was going to burst when Frank ate a bag of skittles that happened to have an above average number of the red ones, which are his favorite color.

A little over thirty minutes later, after Gerard’s showered and gotten dressed he makes his way out of the apartment. He stops to get his morning coffee on the way to work so that he doesn’t accidentally fall asleep on the Subway and somehow end up in Toronto. The train doesn’t go that far, but he’s sure it would happen somehow or another. That, or he’d end up smelling like the bottom of a shoe.

Gerard almost forgets that he was going to give Aaron a call until noon. He curses himself for not waking Aaron up at an inconvenient time when he had the chance, but it’s too late now.

He makes his way out of the building he works in to take his lunch break, and stows himself away in a small coffee shop. For about ten minutes he just sits there looking at his phone, trying to convince himself to dial. Gerard frowns, feeling his heart beat in his chest as he looks through his phone.

He doesn’t overly like talking to people on the phone at the best of times, but this is a million times worse, because he has to call Aaron. He would rather eat his own thumbs. Gerard is afraid of Aaron. He doesn’t feel shameful of that fact either, because Aaron is one terrifying son of a bitch. He’s bigger than Gerard, and richer, and his accent is nicer. Gerard’s trying to reason how on earth Frank picked him over Aaron. Aaron is a Greek god. He’s not even that. His face was _carved_ by gods. Gerard still can’t grow facial hair. Aaron can probably grow a beard in a day and a half. Gerard hates him.

Gerard keeps frowning to himself, downing an unhealthy amount of caffeine, which is doing the opposite of slowing his heart rate down. It’s making it pound a million times quicker. Gerard’s heart pace is the same as if he’d just run a marathon. He’d rather run a marathon than call Aaron. No he wouldn’t. He’s desperately out of shape, he’d probably die after a hundred yards.

Finally, Gerard’s fingers decide to cooperate with him and he’s able to call Aaron. His blood is pumping in his ears like a coursing river. He’s not even sure if he’ll be able to hear Aaron over the sound of his own anxiety.

“Hello?” a voice asks with a stupidly pretty accent. Gerard hates Aaron and his stupid French Canadian accent. He hates the fact that Aaron probably spoke French to Frank sometimes. He just hates Aaron.

“Uh, hello,” Gerard says, cringing at the sound of his own voice.

“Who is this?”

“Okay, so I want to talk to you about what you’re doing to Frank,” Gerard bursts out with before he can stop himself.

“Wait, you’re Frank’s roommate aren’t you?”

“Yes.”

“What do you want?”

“I just told you! I want to talk to you about your extremely childish behavior towards Frank,” Gerard says.

“Why should I talk to you?”

Gerard can’t think of an answer, because, really, why _should_ he talk to Gerard? Gerard shakes the doubt off, and tells himself to direct his anger at the guy he’s angry with.

“You know, it’s pretty low that you’re trying to get back at Frank. It’s such a juvenile way to behave. Are you still that immature? You’re getting revenge on a guy which isn’t something rich CEO’s do. They just don’t. We’re all adults here.”

“Frank deserves it.”

“Deserves it? For what? All he did was admit that he wasn’t in love with you. He did what he had to do. Would you have wanted to date a guy who wasn’t capable of falling in love with you? It wouldn’t be real. You can’t be angry with him for just not falling in love with you. That’s not his fault,” Gerard says.

“No, it’s your fault,” Aaron says. Gerard smiles to himself a little bit, because he can sense the jealousy in Aaron’s tone. Gerard can’t even describe how good it feels to have Aaron hate him for having Frank. There’s something amazing about knowing a guy who has everything, money, a big house, fame, a good job, respect, and more, is jealous of _him_. Gerard has the one thing in the world that Aaron doesn’t have and wants so dearly.

“I’ll own up to that,” Gerard says cockily, “but you can’t say that Frank’s a bad person for breaking up with you so that he didn’t cheat. Face it Aaron, if he hadn’t broken up with you, there’s a good chance he might’ve cheated on you.”

“He would not!”

“No, because being in love with me, and not being in love with you totally means he’d be committed to you,” Gerard replies sarcastically.

“Well why the hell would he want you? You’re poor, and you can’t give him anything. What the hell do you have to offer him?”

Gerard has no idea what he has that Aaron doesn’t, other than one thing, “Well I have the most important thing. I have Frank’s love. I can’t give you a reason as to why that’s true, but it is. He loves me, and not you. There’s nothing you can do about that, and you didn’t exactly handle it very well, did you? I hear you threw a bowl at his face.”

“I gave Frank like three months and he breaks up with me over what? He likes someone else? What a weak excuse! Stringing me along all that time when he never liked me.”

“You’re wrong. Frank liked you. You wanna know why he chose me? He might’ve picked you, Aaron, I swear, it was a real possibility, but he picked me because you tried to drive his friends away. You were so possessive! You tried to isolate him, getting him mad at his friends, and being manipulative. Now granted, I acted like a dick towards him too, but never so much as you. Not even kind of.”

Aaron makes a scoffing sound, “You were trying to steal him away from me!”

“I was respecting Frank’s choice to choose! The last thing in the world I would ever do is tell him what he had to do. I made that mistake once, I wouldn’t do it again. I gave him his space though, and you, well you threw fine china at him,” Gerard says.

“It didn’t hit him, grow up.”

“You’re telling me to grow up?” Gerard asks, exasperatedly, “We do not throw cookware at the people whose pants we want to get into, dude! That is not okay!”

Gerard looks around to see that he caught a few people’s attention with that, as he’d raised his voice a little bit. He waves awkwardly at the bystanders in the coffee shop and tries to concentrate on Aaron trying to defend himself.

After a few seconds Gerard gets annoyed and says, “Alright dude, this isn’t about the bowl anymore. The bowl is in the past. The bowl is in pieces in your local landfill. This is about you making Frank unhireable.”

Aaron snickers at that and Gerard drives the pen he’s holding into the table a little bit. He hadn’t even noticed himself pick it up, and he doesn’t know where it came from, but it makes a small inky blotch in the wood of the table. Gerard drops it before he splits the table in two out of frustration.

“So you noticed that have you?” Aaron asks.

“Listen, it’s not okay. Frank is a good person. We both know that. He’s the best guy. You want him, I know you do, that’s why you’re doing this to him. It’s because you still like him, and you want to teach him a lesson for not being with you, but you know what, that’s not okay. Don’t do this to him!”

“Why shouldn’t I?”

Gerard rolls his eyes, “I just gave you a reason. Besides, you shouldn’t need to have any reason to not be a dickhead to people. That should just be inherent. You should just know not to be an asshole. That’s common sense.”

“Well, you know, I’m not going to get Frank. That’s fact at this point.”

“You shouldn’t have thrown a bowl at him,” Gerard mumbles.

“The fact is that, any relationship between me and Frank is kaput now, so why on earth should I let him just get by scot-free? No, that’s not my speed.”

“You always get what you want, don’t you? You’re used to having everything, and the one thing you can’t have, the one thing in the world that isn’t yours slipped away from you, so now you’re pouting like a toddler who had his juice box stolen.”

“Make as many similes as you want, I’m not giving up on this. Have fun with him, but I won’t let up.”

“Listen here you little weasel, Frank is a good person, and you didn’t deserve him in the first place. I know your kind, okay? You think you can buy your way to anything, but I’m not going to let that happen. You do this to Frank, to us, just because he chose me, and there will be repercussions. I will not let this slide, you hear? You can’t just ruin Frank’s life and not expect any backfire.”

“Okay,” Aaron says with a disbelieving laugh.

“I am not going to let you just walk all over him.”

“Whatever. This conversation is over.”

“It is n-” Gerard says, when the other end clicks, “hello? Aaron?”

Gerard takes the phone away from his ear and looks down at it, to see the flashing ‘call ended’ sign.

Gerard groans long and hard, letting his head fall against the table, whispering under his breath, “bitch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I bought Sims 4 which may not have been a good idea for my productivity.


	32. Gerard Has A Nice Ass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete’s not a complete idiot.

“You really should’ve asked me first,” Frank says.

“Yeah, I know. I should have, but I assumed you’d have told me not to, so I figured I’d get it over with,” Gerard replies.

“You needn’t have bothered. I could’ve told you how the conversation would go without you needing to call him. Aaron likes to talk about himself, I never really noticed it until I reflected on it, but he does. He doesn’t really care about other people’s feelings, so obviously he doesn’t give a shit if I never loved him or not. He just wanted me as an accessory. Like a handbag or a bracelet. That’s all I ever really was to him. I was just an accessory for his arm.”

“Well I hate Aaron, but I will give him one thing, he does have good taste,” Gerard says.

“Not really.”

“Well he thinks you’re attractive doesn’t he? That’s something. He’s still a dick who I would very much like to run over with a steamroller, but he isn’t an idiot where it counts.”

“You’re celebrating his taste in men because he dated me?” Frank asks, “Maybe you’re both just blind.”

“Or maybe you’re not giving yourself any credit.”

Frank rolls his eyes, “Whatever. So other than Aaron telling you that he has no intentions of backing off, was there anything else he said or asked or anything?”

“Um, I don’t think so,” Gerard responds. “Mostly I got the impression that his pride was really hurt by you dumping him, so to regain what he lost, he’s trying to ruin your life, and by extension, mine. Though I think we all know who’s won here.”

“Well no offense, but your competition wasn’t exactly very outstanding, Gerard,” Frank shrugs.

“Are you saying I’m just so amazing that I outshine Aaron, or Aaron’s such a twat that he would be outshined by a lump of clay?”

“Both.”

“I’ll take it.”

Frank smirks, “Good, because that’s the most you’re gonna get.”

“Thanks,” Gerard says back, putting his head in his hands to stare at Frank across the counter.

“So what do we do about this then?” Frank asks.

“That’s a good question.”

“Aaron’s not going to stop trying to make my life hell, that’s been established. I need a job though. I can’t just not have a job because a stupid ex won’t let me breathe in peace. I need money so that I can afford to buy things and what not, and for cash I need to have a job or become really fucking fantastic at poker overnight. I also can’t just leave the city either. I’m assuming getting a job out of New York might cause his reach on other people to be muted, so a few miles out, I might be able to get a job, but I can’t just leave because of him. I won’t be driven away because Aaron’s a bitch, that’s like admitting defeat.”

“No, you’re right. Your life’s here.”

Frank nods, “Exactly. You, Pete and Patrick, everyone I care about is here.”

“You care about me!” Gerard giggles.

“Shut up,” Frank says, shaking his head at the childish grin on Gerard’s face. Gerard just smiles back at him gaudily.

“Well that doesn’t answer the question about what we’re going to do. We can’t exactly kill Aaron, can we? We’ve got to come up with a good solution.”

“Killing Aaron seems like a completely agreeable thing to do,” Gerard says, looking so serious that it almost concerns Frank.

“We’re not going to kill Aaron!”

“I don’t see why not,” Gerard says, folding his arms across his chest.

“Gerard, we are not murdering anyone!”

“Oh who are we murdering?” a new voice asks, and Frank turns around to see who just barged in. It just had to be while Gerard was plotting to murder someone that Patrick and Pete decide to enter their apartment. Not only that but the walked in without knocking, which could have had disastrous consequences under different circumstances. Then again, they never seem to lock their door, so Gerard and Frank would have to take most of the blame.

“We’re not murdering anyone!” Frank says.

“Says you,” Gerard grumbles looking unhappy about the fact that Frank just disallowed him to murder someone.

“Who are we killing then? Aaron?” Pete asks, “Well if you need an alibi, I can be bought with a bag of potato chips.”

“He’s not kidding,” Patrick says, “I once convinced Pete to have a cavity filled with a tube of Pringles. Thinking back on it, I see now that that might not have been the most fitting way to handle the situation.”

“You bought him a bag of cavities so that he could fix one,” Gerard says, shaking his head. “But I guess Frank’s not going to let me kill Aaron.”

“Well yeah! I’m not going to let you kill anyone, Gerard. We just got together, I do not want you to be in prison after I finally fucking got you to say ‘I love you’. Or, even worse, I do not want you to die right after we got together.”

Gerard snorts, “It’s almost the plot of Tess of the d'Urbervilles. Though, I guess that would imply that Frank would have to marry Mikey... never mind.”

“Why do you like him?” Pete asks.

“I’ve been asking myself that same thing every day for the past few weeks,” Frank shakes his head looking at Gerard like he’s an idiot.

“I heard that Aaron made it impossible for you to get a job,” Patrick says, “but you two are too busy sucking face nowadays that we haven’t had a proper conversation in like four days.”

“Well don’t you prefer him being here rather than with Aaron the shitdick?” Gerard asks.

“Is that what we’re calling him now?” Pete asks, “I could get used to that. Aaron the shitdick, it has a certain ring to it.”

“It’s kind of mean,” Patrick says.

“Aaron is a fuckwad, he deserves it,” Frank says.

“Still mean,” Patrick shrugs, “but I do hate him. The only person allowed to throw bowls at you are the people in this room.”

“Paper bowls,” Gerard says, “I don’t want you to do anything to harm his face. He has a nice face.”

“Thanks.”

“Yep,” Gerard grins.

“Well, I mean, we could try to fight back,” Frank says.

“You two are nobodies,” Pete says honestly, “how on earth can you get back at a guy who has a building named after him?”

“Please tell me you’re kidding about that,” Gerard says, “I will never be able to live with myself if Frank’s ex-boyfriend has a building named after him.”

“Well he did build a school in Africa, Gerard,” Frank says, “what do you think they called it?”

“The Shitdick School,” Gerard says, frowning.

“Yeah,” Pete nods, “it’s called the Shitdick School. Congratulations, Gerard.”

“Well you can’t just let him get away with that though,” Patrick says, “can’t you like, I don’t know, does he have a boss?”

“He is his boss,” Frank says.

“Well that’s not ideal, but maybe you could... ugh, I don’t know, I can’t think of anything,” Patrick says.

“That’s the problem Gerard and I came to. We don’t know what we can fucking do to this guy!”

“Well,” Pete says in a tone that suggests he’s about to say something of questionable legality.

“Oh no,” Patrick says, looking at Pete like he’s a bomb.

“You haven’t even heard my idea yet!”

“This is you, Pete,” Frank says, “Hearing you say ‘well’ can mean one of three things. You want to do something dangerous, you want to do something stupid, or you want to do something stupid and dangerous.”

“You guys have such little faith in me,” Pete says.

“Well then tell us what your idea is so that we don’t think you’re an idiot,” Gerard says.

Pete makes a moping face, but Patrick makes a different face in response that says something like ‘Pete, I will hurt you if you don’t say what you’re thinking’ and it has a lot of power. Even Frank feels like spilling his soul to Patrick right now.

“Well, see, I was just thinking,” Pete says, “Aaron is a big name, right? Like everyone with any knowledge of corporate businessmen has heard his name on several occasions.”

“Right. You’re stating facts then,” Frank says, “Snow is white. Murder is bad. Batman is a bamf. Gerard has a nice ass.”

“Too far, I didn’t need that information!” Patrick declares.

“You’re not blind,” Frank says with a shrug.

“I do not appreciate being treated like a piece of meat,” Gerard replies.

“You do have a nice ass though,” Frank says matter-of-factly.

“Are we just not going to listen to my idea then?” Pete questions.

“What was your idea?”

Pete sighs, “Well it’s just that a big name like that, a guy who’s never done anything bad, someone who’s super charitable, what do you think the press would think of a guy like that if we told them this story? A guy this charitable, this family friendly, this influential? His whole life could be ruined by a story about his abusive behavior, don’t you think? And what’s one thing that everyone who buys gossip magazines likes? A good old fashioned scandal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a bit too long, sorry about that.


	33. Frank Posted an Ad on Craigslist (Not That Kind of Ad, Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is where a summary would go if I gave a shit.

“Right so, I thought, hey, wouldn’t it be a grand idea to put an ad on craigslist to see if Aaron’s done this before,” Frank says.

“And?”

“Well, I didn’t think he’d done it so many _times_ before,” Frank replies.

“Wait, hold on,” Gerard says, holding out a hand, “you’re saying that, not only is Aaron a dick, he’s a serial dick?”

“He is indeed a serial dick,” Frank confirms.

“So how many other guys was he a sadistic asshole with?” Gerard asks, putting his head on Frank’s shoulder to look at the computer in front of him.

“Well three people have replied so far,” Frank says, “over the course of about four years, Aaron is infamous, underground that is, for giving boys everything and dropping them like flies. I think I’m the only one that ever stuck around for more than two months.”

“Um,” Gerard makes a sound, “did you stick around the longest or did Aaron _keep_ you the longest?”

“Well, I think technically, Aaron kept me the longest, but that makes me sound like I’m in someone’s possession which is disgusting.” 

“No I didn’t mean to imply that. I just mean... well, if he kept you around the longest, I think what we can take from that is that you meant the most. If you meant the most, I think what that means is that you hurt him.”

“You think I hurt him?” Frank asks.

“If you did, I’m really fucking proud of you,” Gerard replies and kisses Frank on the cheek.

“You realize that you just congratulated me for being mean to him.”

“I hate him, Frank,” Gerard says with utter seriousness. “Like, I want to watch him dangling off a cliff and step on his fingers to make him fall. I want to reenact that one scene from the Lion King and watch him get stampeded by a million wildebeests. I want Gollum to bite his finger off and then dangle him off the ledge in Mount Doom. I want a giant watery hand to burst out of the ocean and drown him like Admiral Zhao. I want him to go canyoneering when a rockslide happens out of nowhere getting his arm caught between a boulder and the canyon wall, forcing him to chop his arm off.”

“Gerard, calm yourself.”

“I can’t. I hate that man so much. Like for one thing, he wasn’t good to you, and second, he kept me from you and I fucking love you, and I just really want to tear his head off.”

“We need to buy you a voodoo doll or something so that you don’t do something stupid,” Frank shakes his head, but smiles at Gerard, who’s head is still resting against his own. 

“Can anyone blame me?”

“No not particularly, but Gerard, that’s the point of calling that reporter guy. This whole thing is about poetic justice. Not murdering him. That would be bad. Now granted, he’s the kind of guy where you’d probably root for the murderer on an episode of a crime show, but that doesn’t make it any less bad.”

“God, if I didn’t have you, I’d probably have killed that guy weeks ago,” Gerard sighs.

“I’m such a good influence,” Frank grins. “Okay, so I’ve talked with the three guys and they’ve agreed to speak with the reporter about Aaron too. What’s better than the testimony of me? Me and three other people! Maybe more, the ad’s only been up for about four hours.”

“Oh god, we’re going to nail him!” Gerard says grinning, “no one is going to take that guy seriously ever again.”

“Now, don’t count your eggs before they’ve hatched, Gerard. If everything goes flawlessly than hopefully this will work, but we don’t know that yet, so just calm your tits until we have confirmation.”

Gerard groans, “ugh, but I want him to die painfully!”

“I know,” Frank nods slowly, “has anyone ever told you that you’re kind of cute when you’re plotting a murder?”

Gerard looks at Frank and giggles, “you know, I can honestly say that that would be a first.”

“Good,” Frank says, “Because I don’t want you plotting murder with any other boys. Or anyone for that matter.”

“I won’t. You’re the only guy who I want to conspire assassination with. So what about these other guys Aaron was a bitch to then? Tell me about them!” Gerard asks.

“Uh, well lemme see,” Frank says, “okay, so this guy is a chef. Another one of them is a struggling actor, and he’s been struggling a lot more since dating Aaron, because apparently, I’m not the only guy that Aaron has blackballed. The last guy didn’t list his job. He’s the only one who provided me proof of dating Aaron though, he’s got a picture of the two of them. He’s kind of cute actually.”

“Watch it.”

“Sorry. He’s kind of not bad to look at, but not as nice to look at as you are,” Frank says, and Gerard snorts at how stupid that sounded.

“So did they agree to make statements against Aaron too then?”

“Well bachelor number one wants to, let’s see, claw Aaron’s eyes out of his skull with an ice cream scoop. Bachelor number two isn’t as creative, he just wants to cut Aaron’s intestines out with a blunt butter knife, and well, bachelor number three wants to take a snapshot of his internet history and send it to his mother.”

“Ew,” Gerard says making a face.

“The point is that they will gladly assist in ruining Aaron’s life. Hopefully we can bury this man with all of the shit he’s done.”

“What specifically happened to them though?” Gerard asks.

“Um, well the first guy, his name is Lyle, kind of a boring name if you ask me, but anyway, they met when Aaron went to the restaurant that Lyle works at, kind of like me. Hit it off, but then four weeks later, he dumped Lyle on his ass because Aaron was seeing someone else who he liked better.”

“Whoa so he reprimanded you for leaving him for me, but he cheated on someone as well?”

“Hey! Don’t say ‘as well’ I never cheated on anybody. But yeah, he’s a hypocrite. Which is why we need to ruin his life. Anyway the next guy, I’ll bring up his facebook page, gimme a second,” Frank says, and clicks through a few pages on the computer, “so he’s named Seth, but he doesn’t look like a Seth, he looks more like a, um, I don’t know...”

“Reese,” Gerard states.

“Reese? Yeah, he looks like a Reese. Anyway, the guy who looks like a Reese but is actually named Seth, was the guy that Lyle was cheated on with, so yikes. The last guy, no name given, isn’t telling me what happened between him and Aaron. He seems kind of private, but he does want to ruin Aaron’s life and that’s the good thing.”

“So when’s the reporter coming?” 

“About half an hour now,” Frank says, “and then they’ll speak with the other guys. I don’t know when this article going to be published, but it’ll be sometime soon, and then we’re going to fucking destroy Aaron.”

“Oh god,” Gerard says, “you know I can honestly say that never in my life have I ever wanted to watch a guy’s life get ruined. Never. But Aaron... he’s the exception. I don’t even have the words to tell you how excited I am to watch him burn.”

“Aww,” Frank says, “I love my sadistic boyfriend. He’s so cute.”

“How cute?”

“So cute that I kind of want to frame your picture and put it on my desk, but I don’t have a desk because I’m jobless.”

“Hopefully that won’t be true for long,” Gerard notes.

“Yeah, well until, then it means more time with you,” Frank says.

“I would fucking quit my job to spend more time with you, only that would be stupid because then we would not be able to pay rent.”

“Yeah, maybe not a good idea,” Frank says, “though I wish we had more time together. You know how boring it gets when you’re at work, and I’m just here?”

“Well we’re not busy now...”

“Gerard, we are expecting company in less than half an hour,” Frank points out.

“Well-”

“No, Gerard.”

“But-”

“No, Gerard.”

“What if-”

“No, Gerard,” Frank says and that ends Gerard’s questioning.

“Spoilsport,” Gerard mutters, shaking his head.

“Love you too,” Frank says, pouting his lip.

“You know I do.”

“Yeah, I know,” Frank says, smiling as Gerard nibbles at his ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey, did I forget to mention that I may or may not have found myself a girlfriend? Haha silly me (though in my defense, I was waiting to tell someone else first, but I love all you guys too). So yeah, just saying, you should be proud of me.


	34. Frank and Gerard Are All Gross and Coupley (But They Love It)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary. Description. Explanation. Information. Depiction. These are synonyms.

“You understand how much I’m risking by just speaking to you two?” the woman asks, with her pursed lips in a frown across her heavily botoxed face.

“Evidently a lot because you just said you were risking anything at all,” Frank states.

“I could lose my job for this,” she says.

“Well it’s too late for me to lose _my_ job. You know, because Aaron Crépeau is a piece of shit and got me fired than proceeded to make it impossible for me to ever be hired in a job again.”

“So you say,” the interviewer replies and Frank may not like her as a person, but he’s still really hoping she’s not actually horrible like she’s coming off to be.

“Why would I lie about that?” Frank replies, “Do you realize how little I would gain by tearing down this man? If I hadn’t been in a relationship with the guy, why on earth would I care about him? I was a waiter at the oldest, dingiest diner in town, do you really think I even knew who he was? The only magazines, or news articles I read have pictures of puppies on the covers. I literally would never have crossed paths with him if I hadn’t dated him. So, no, I’m not lying. I may be biased because I have a great desire to tear his lungs out of his body, but I’m not dishonest.”

Gerard smiles at Frank when he goes on his minor rant, because there’s something attractive about the tone of his voice. Now granted, there’s something attractive about the tone of his voice, no matter what tone it is, but Gerard really likes this one especially. 

The interviewer clears her throat, “Alright, so aside from the blackballing is there anything else to be noted, before I get more details?”

“Uh yeah, there was the bowl he threw at my face,” Frank says.

“And the part where he tried to isolate Frank from all of his friends, including me, his roommate,” Gerard says.

“And the time where he threatened Gerard,” Frank says.

“And there’s the fact that Aaron got him fired in the first fucking place,” Gerard concludes.

“Yeah, that kind of sums it up,” Frank says, “oh, and I can’t forget about all the times he guilt tripped me. Like there was that time where he tried to get in my pants and, granted, he took no for an answer, but he pouted about it for days. He treated me like shit for rejecting him.”

“You never told me that,” Gerard frowns.

“Well I didn’t want you to do something stupid.”

“I’d have probably done something stupid. Good call.”

“Yeah,” Frank says, “well so Aaron was just always telling me what to do, taking me places I didn’t really want to go, because apparently I would enjoy a five star restaurant more than three dollar tacos. By the way, I don’t know if you’ve ever been to a restaurant where the wine costs more than three years’ salary, but the food is not as fantastic as they’d like to make you think. Literally my food tasted like seawater with a hint of balsamic vinegar, and let’s just put it this way, balsamic vinegar is the work of Satan.”

“Colorful description,” the interviewer responds, jotting something down.

“Yeah, he just didn’t listen to me. God, he always had to be right. I never even noticed it until it was like, behind me, but they say hindsight is 20/20 for a reason. No, but seriously, like whatever the fuck I tried to say, he was right. Always him. God, I couldn’t get a word in edgewise,” Frank continues.

“That just means he’s a lunatic because you’re the most interesting person to listen to that I know,” Gerard says, and Frank blushes than hits him in the arm.

“So what’s the nature of your relationship? You two?” the interviewer asks and Frank raises an eyebrow because, this woman is either a blind idiot, or... no, well a blind idiot. Pete describes Gerard and Frank as ‘so disgustingly coupley that I’m going to have to push you two off a ten story building just to rid myself of all the cooties swarming off of you.’

Frank rolls his eyes and looks at the woman, trying not to sound condescending, because the last thing he wants is to piss her off so that she doesn’t write the article.

“This is Gerard, he was my roommate,” Frank says, “and he is now currently my boyfriend.”

“So it’s a romantic relationship?”

“Yes. He fucks me,” Gerard adds without emotion. 

“Graphic,” Frank says.

“Could’ve been worse,” Gerard shrugs.

“So do you think your relationship contributed to the collapse of your relationship with Aaron?” The interviewer asks.

“Well,” Frank fidgets, “yeah. ‘Cause the thing is that I’d been in love with Gerard for what, like five years, coming up on six now, and Gerard is an idiot. A certifiable idiot. His only real loves in this world are superheroes and coffee. That’s the only shit Gerard cared about so he didn’t fucking notice that, hey, I’m in love with him. And then Aaron comes along and he’s dashing and sweet and rich and I didn’t notice any of those problematic things, because when you’re falling for someone, you put on horse blinders. Seriously, the past month I have somehow overlooked the fact that Gerard takes really long showers and uses up all the hot water.”

“Do I do that?” Gerard asks, sounding guilty.

“Yeah, but it’s endearing,” Frank replies, “and also it gives me a reason to join you because I don’t want to take a shower at a polar temperature.”

“Oh so that’s why-”

“Exactly,” Frank interrupts him, “but anyway, back to Aaron’s involvement in my life, he was my way of getting over Gerard, and for a little while I thought it was going to work. It was brand new and exciting and there was that hope that maybe I’d be able to move on. I’d felt like a Soap Opera star for too long, but then this asshole, let’s call him Gerard, decides that he’s been in love with me for a really long time but he’s just so goddamn stupid-”

“So fucking stupid,” Gerard mutters, shaking his head.

“Right. So stupid, he was in love with me and didn’t realize it and he came onto me which was like a little insane, whoa, because I was in a relationship. So I pushed Gerard away, because I am anything but a cheater, but I realized that there was no way I was going to be able to make things work with Aaron when it’s clear that I wasn’t over Gerard. So I just went over to Aaron and told him, he was a great guy, you know, like perfect for someone out there, but that it just wasn’t going to work out, because there’s someone else I think I might be crazy for. Anyway, long story short, that angered Aaron, because I had been dating him for like two and a half months which made me essentially his property in his head, and then he threw a bowl at my face.”

“Yes, don’t forget to acknowledge the bowl throwing,” Gerard says, “Because if it had hit him that would have been a real tragedy. Have you seen how pretty he is?”

Frank giggles, “Oh man, we are so appallingly coupley.”

“I know, isn’t it great?”

“It’s the best thing ever, it’s fantastic!” Frank says. Mostly because he’s never been one half of that really mushy couple that everyone gets annoyed by. He’s been on the outside, looking and somewhat envying the overly affectionate couple, but he’s never been in it, and it feels good. It feels great. It’s the best feeling in the world, so much so that Frank does not even care that he is annoying everyone around him because he gets to be all gross and coupley with Gerard. If it were anyone but Gerard he’d have to take a step back in life and hit himself over the head with a table lamp. Considering it is Gerard though, he has to do no such thing, he’s just going to cling to the guy like he needs hugs to breathe. Which, Frank is sure, he’s developing a rare disorder where that is indeed the case. He needs to be cuddled or else he dies.

“Okay,” the interviewer says, trying to rail the conversation back onto topic, “so don’t you think your involvement with your roommate might have sparked some sort of jealousy in Mr. Crépeau?”

“That’s kind of the point of when he threatened me in the hallway,” Gerard says.

“Okay, and what happened exactly?”

“Well, so Frank invited Aaron over for dinner and things did not go smoothly. I’ll admit my behavior was atrocious, I was not very polite to him at all. I get that, I’m in the future, I see that now. So Frank got mad at me because I was being really cold to his boyfriend. So Frank decided they were going to leave because it was just too much to handle and the situation was going to get way worse if he’d stayed. I kind of get that, sort of, but I haven’t entirely forgiven the part where he left for nine days. But anyway, as Frank was leaving, I followed him out to apologize, but Aaron ambushed me in the hallway and the dude was super mysterious with his threat. It was subtle, but he was definitely threatening me.”

“I never believed him until a few weeks ago when I saw that side of Aaron for myself,” Frank explains.

“But if you cheated on the man, doesn’t that give him some right to get angry?” The interviewer asks.

“I did not cheat on him! I didn’t! I did not cheat! Did _not_. Cheating was not done by me. Aaron has never been cheated on by me. I did not cheat on Aaron with Gerard, or anyone else for that matter.”

“I think she got the picture, Frankie,” Gerard says.

“I am not a cheater!” Frank says again, “Okay? I didn’t. Gerard just sort of came onto me, and I was like ‘oh so this is a thing that is happening right now, what to do?’ and then I told him that I’m not a cheater.”

The interviewer raises her pen like she’s about to contradict him, and starts “But-”

“No!” Frank yells, “If you order a veggie burger at a restaurant and they intentionally serve you a real burger masquerading as a veggie burger, you’re still a vegetarian! You just had a blip there where someone tried to change you. Gerard came on a little strong, but he backed off, and, once he cooled down, he apologized for it. Aaron never did that, by the way, if we got into an argument, it was always my fault. I didn’t cheat on Aaron though, that’s my point.”

“So you didn’t cheat?”

“Do you really want him to lecture you again?” Gerard asks, “Because I have known Frank for a very long time. I promise you, Frank will keep going. He will hand in a ten page essay on all the reasons why what happened between us does not constitute cheating.”

Frank smiles and adds, “Single spaced.”

“Right. A single spaced essay,” Gerard confirms. “In eleven point font! Ain’t no twelve point shit, no, Frank is going to go big, because he is already home so he would have trouble going big or alternatively going home.”

“That was a long way to go,” Frank says.

“Yeah, and the joke really wasn’t worth it.”

“No, not really,” Frank says, making a face, but he’s smiling anyway.

“Can we get back to the interview?”

“What?” Frank asks, looking around like he’d forgotten the existence of the interviewer completely, “Oh yeah, sorry. It’s just that we get sidetracked easily.”

“Very easily,” Gerard nods. “Sorry, I’m not helping.”

“No, not really,” the interviewer says, looking bored.

“Okay, let’s get to it! How many questions do you have total?”

The interviewer looks down at her notebook and counts for a moment before saying, “thirty.”

Gerard and Frank groan in unison, then laugh _because_ they groaned in unison, and this earns them a scold from the interviewer. They then sit quietly trying not to laugh like they’re schoolchildren who just got put into a timeout and are not sorry in the slightest. They aren’t sorry though, because they’re just really giddy off the fact that they can be all gross and coupley in front of whoever they like now, because they’re actually a couple. And that’s what matters, really.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a bit too long, but I've been kind of busy.


	35. Frank is Not a Morning Person

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the penultimate chapter, by the way.

“Oh I don’t like this line,” Frank says, making a disgruntled face.

“Well it was put there courteously, but I kind of agree with you. I think that’s somewhat oversharing, but it could’ve been worse. It could have been way more impolite,” Gerard says, reading over Frank’s shoulder.

“What line are you two talking about?” Pete asks, looking down at his own copy of the newspaper and trying to figure out what they’re looking at.

Frank clears his throat and recites, “’the unnamed ex denies allegations of infidelity on his part, saying that the advances were sudden and unreciprocated.’”

“Oh, they’re talking about Gerard coming onto you?” Pete asks, reading over the line for himself. “I guess, you’ve got to give the journalist credit. She didn’t _accuse_ you of anything on the paper.”

“Well she did when she asked me about it,” Frank replies.

“But she didn’t relay that to the page, did she? It’s left rather openly, and I guess it’s a matter of interpretation. You did sort of cheat on Aaron, but you didn’t like actually _cheat_ on him.”

“Did you just say that I didn’t cheat on him, but I did?”

“You know what I mean,” Pete replies.

“He’s, ugh, it’s my fault if anything,” Gerard says.

“It’s your fault that I got called a cheater?”

“Well,” Gerard sighs, “I did sort of jump you. That wasn’t an alright thing for me to do. I should’ve asked you first, but there’s nothing romantic about sitting a guy down and telling him you want to get in his pants. That’s just weird. I mean, that’s just a brief list of things I want, or wanted at the time, because I’m just fucking mad for you, but really, I shouldn’t have just kissed you like that.”

“Yeah,” Pete says, “you should’ve written down on a piece of paper ‘I like you, do you like me, check yes or no.’ That would have gotten Frank to fall in love with you.”

“I think you’re forgetting the part where I was in love with him for like five years already. Though now that you say it, I might have fallen out of love if I’d been given such a childish a break.”

“Hey!” Gerard says.

“What?”

“Well I know Pete said it and he’s goofing around, but seriously, you’d fall out of love with me for me clarifying with checkmarks... actually, you know what, I wouldn’t blame you. That has got to be the lamest way to get with someone.”

“So what about the rest of the article,” Pete says, steering them back onto topic.

“What?” Frank asks, having forgotten what was going on momentarily, “oh, right. Yeah. Uh, I think it’s pretty good, other than the part where she implied that I’m a cheating dirtbag.”

“She said no such thing!” Gerard says.

“But it’s my reputation being shat on.”

“Uh,” Pete says, “you are the ‘unnamed ex.’ There’s no intelligible link between you and the person she wrote about. Dude, the author could be referring to Hulk Hogan for all anyone knows.”

“Yeah,” Gerard nods, “or Paul Rudd.”

Pete nods, “maybe even Lord Voldemort.”

“Lord Voldemort is a fictional character,” Frank says, making an unimpressed face.

“Right, and do you really think Aaron dated Paul Rudd?”

“Touché.”

“Well the rest of this article seems pretty formal and expositive. She talks about how Aaron’s done this before, and how his behavior is borderline abusive,” Pete says, “I think if we can get the story to spread, we can take the son of a bitch down.”

“I hope so,” Frank groans, “That’s the point at least.”

“Don’t worry, Frankie,” Gerard says, putting an arm around him, “he’s a high profile dude. It’s always dangerous to be a dick when a lot of people know your name. If you’re a nobody, the worst that’s going to happen to you is that you lose a friend or get fired. When you’re a big name, a celebrity or a businessman like Aaron, then it’s about your whole life basically going up in smoke.”

“Is it bad that I feel good about the idea of ruining his life?” Frank asks.

“Somewhat, but not really,” Pete says, “I kind of feel good about it too.”

“Patrick probably wouldn’t admit to it, but he doesn’t like Aaron any more than the rest of us?”

“Where is Patrick by the way?” Gerard asks, looking around. It’s the middle of the afternoon on a Friday and Patrick is nowhere to be seen.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Pete says, waving a hand at them.

“What’s nothing?” Gerard asks. “Did you two have a fight or something?”

“No, _definitely_ not that,” Pete says, “just, let us have our secrets for a little while longer.”

“Whatever you say, Pete,” Frank rolls his eyes, and resigns to rereading the story over. Really, it isn’t that bad. The author does make it a point to emasculate Aaron more than she does Frank, but he still wishes that he didn’t have to bare the weight of being a cheater. It doesn’t have as much of an effect on him though, because Frank is anonymized, but it’s a mental thing. He doesn’t want to be thought of as a bad person. 

Frank knows that he made a mistake. He did, that’s true. He shouldn’t have kissed Gerard back. He didn’t deserve what Aaron did in response though, that much he knows. That wasn’t his fault. Aaron was just being a dick. As usual.

How could someone who’d seemed so perfect turn out to be so sour? He was like a lemon drop. He was sweet on the outside but once Frank got to know him he was anything but. He was a completely different person than the guy that saved Frank from being run over. It’s like he wasn’t even the same man at all. Aaron just had some sort of body switching curse, and became an asshole once you got to know him.

Aaron was a workaholic. He was arrogant. The guy was elitist. Aaron tried to change who Frank was to suit him better. That’s just not something you do. Either you like the person they are or you get out of their life. You can’t just change a person to be more appealing to you. That’s sick. It’s not okay. Why did Frank let Aaron _do_ that to him?

Why did Frank fall for him? Probably because he was so charismatic. So good at hypnotizing Frank. He played Frank, right from the get go. Tried to get him to do things Frank would never have done under normal circumstances.

Gerard would never do that. He’d never change Frank. The difference between them is that Aaron wanted an accessory. Someone pretty he could show off at parties. Maybe he liked Frank on a fundamental level, or maybe he didn’t, but that doesn’t matter. The point is that he didn’t care about Frank. Gerard likes Frank’s inner comic book nerd. He likes the dork who cares too much about punk bands and plays his music too loud. 

When it comes down to it, Aaron is the guy who takes him to the five star restaurants and tells him what to order, and Gerard’s the guy who’ll splurge on getting Frank a whole pizza that they both know Frank isn’t going to finish, but will attempt to anyway. Aaron is the guy who takes him to meet dozens of snooty elite friends, while Gerard’s friends can be counted on one hand and they’re the same friends that Frank’s has. Aaron’s the guy who saved Frank from stepping into traffic once, and Gerard’s the one who saved Frank from going insane countless times.

At the end of the day, Gerard is always going to be Frank’s Ramona Flowers.

~*~*~*~

Frank wakes up to banging coming from outside the room. He groans, because it’s way too early for this shit.

It’s the kind of early that means his whole body feels sore and dead when he tries to move it. He can’t even convince his eyes to open themselves. They just want to be closed and stay that way. 

Frank groans long and hard, almost crying with the feeling of not wanting to wake up, but that noise will never allow him to get back to sleep. Also, he has to find out where the noise is fucking coming from. Once he finds the source he can come back to bed and just collapse in the sheets like he really wants to.

Frank’s eyes open, but only through much protest. His eyelids feel like they’ve been stapled shut and when he finally unhinges them, everything he sees is blurry and out of focus. It takes him almost thirty seconds of blinking repeatedly to see anything at all, and his eyes feel dry, but also like he really does want to just cry and go back to bed at the same time. Frank’s not sure how that’s possible. It is though. 

He and Gerard had a late one last night because they can, and it’s a Saturday so they have no obligation to get up. When Frank’s eyes focus in on the glowing clock with bright red numbers, he sees that it’s pushing seven in the morning. That’s too early even if he _had_ gone to bed at a reasonable hour last night. He didn’t. It was like three in the morning. Gerard was playful, he wasn’t going to turn the guy down.

Frank looks over at the lump next to him, and rolls his eyes. Gerard’s got a pillow over his head like he’s aware that something is making noise, but he’s not conscious enough to put together the fact that he might have to do something about it. He’s like a zombie. He’s alive, but he doesn’t have any cognitive synapses. 

“Gerard!” Frank complains, pushing at Gerard who returns his action with a very poorly aimed kick. He just sort of flails around actually, Frank’s not even sure if that was justifiably a kick, or if Gerard was attempting to kick him at all. If Frank’s got to be awake right now though, than Gerard sure as fuck does to.

“Gerard!” Frank says again, pushing him more insistently until Gerard makes a vocal response that resembles a constipated whale. “Wake the fuck up, Gerard.”

“No,” Gerard grumbles. Frank eventually finds that the solution to getting Gerard to wake up is to just push him out of bed. He falls onto the floor with a small thud, muffled by the fact that he took most of the blankets with him. Frank crawls over to Gerard’s side of the bed and he looks down at the crumpled mess on the floor. Gerard looks thirsty for blood.

“Get up,” Frank says lazily, “something is banging on... something else? I don’t know.”

“I think it’s the door,” Gerard replies than yawns loudly, and tries to cover himself up with the blankets. Frank is trying to figure out what he’s doing. To be honest, it looks like Gerard is trying to camouflage himself into the carpet. It’s unsuccessful, for one thing, because there’s no carpet, and for another, the hardwood floor is brown and the sheets are a worn, but still bright, white. It’s like if a raccoon tried to hide in a display of lemons.

“Well get up then,” Frank says.

“Why can’t you get it?” Gerard’s voice comes from the pile of bedding. 

“Because we’re both awake, and I said so.”

“I am not awake,” Gerard says, and that is one statement Frank can agree with. He’s vaguely conscious, but he is not the kind of guy you’d want to spot you on a rock-climbing wall. Actually that’s true under most circumstances. Frank and heavy lifting are about as compatible as marshmallows and horseradish. 

“But we’re conscious.”

“Says you.”

Frank finally just gets up and walks over to Gerard’s side of the bed. He then finds what feels like Gerard’s arm and pulls him up into a sitting position. He looks stupid with a duvet on his head, but Frank tugs it off of him, and finally manages to get Gerard onto his feet. It’s not easy, and it should probably be an Olympic sport, but eventually, Gerard is standing. Well technically he’s slouching, but he’s on his feet and that’s what counts.

“C’mon,” Frank says, dragging Gerard behind him by the hand like he’s a grumpy toddler resisting going into a store.

“You’re not wearing pants,” Gerard points out.

“I have boxers, it’s not the end of the world,” Frank replies. Gerard’s wearing a pair of flannel pajama pants that are baggy, and a shirt that has some small logo on it, Frank suspects it was a free T-shirt from somewhere. At least it’s not that old Ramones shirt that’s quite possibly older than the band itself. 

Frank feels victimized by the light in the kitchen that they forgot to turn off last night. It’s too bright. He feels like he’s got a spotlight on him that was harnessed from light directly from the sun.

“Fuck,” Frank says, almost tripping on nothing.

“It’s louder out here!” Gerard says, trying to take his hand back from Frank to cover his ears, but Frank firms his grip. Gerard just crams one of his hands against his ear and then the other against his own shoulder, to drown out the sound.

“Who the fuck is it this early?” Frank screams at the door when he’s standing in front of it.

“Open the motherfucking door, Frank!” a voice yells back at him, and Frank freezes. The guy has a French accent that Frank is very familiar with.

“Shit,” Frank hisses quietly and all of a sudden, he feels more alert. He looks back at Gerard, who’s still trying to block out the sound of knocking, which isn’t there anymore now that Frank has acknowledged Aaron’s existence.

“Would you grow up?” Frank asks, grumpily, as he grabs Gerard’s hand and moves it away from his ear.

“Who is it?” Gerard asks.

“Aaron,” Frank mouths at him. Gerard paralyzes at Frank’s words with his eyes wide open and he looks somewhat scared.

What Frank wouldn’t give to just have the ground open up and suck him into it. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have that luxury. Instead, Frank takes a long deep breath and sighs as he opens the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One chapter left!


	36. Frank and Gerard Made It to the End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the end.

“Aaron, what the fuck are you doing here?” Frank asks, opening the door to him. Aaron walks in, uninvited, forcing Frank to step back.

“What the fuck is this?” Aaron asks, holding up a newspaper and shoving it in Frank’s face.

“Oh, you saw that did you?” Frank says, rather calmly as he takes the paper from him. He looks down at the crumpled paper and skims over the story that he’s practically memorized at this point.

“Yeah, I fucking saw it!” Aaron yells at him, and Gerard slips around the guy to close the door behind him. It’s too early to piss off the other people in the hall. Especially Pete, he needs his beauty sleep.

“What’d you think?” Frank asks dotingly.

“You’re slandering my name, Frank!” Aaron scoffs at him, “my phone has been ringing off the hook because of your meddling.”

“I only told the truth!”

“You told your side of the truth!” Aaron says.

“No, I told the truth. I’m not even painted perfectly in this article, Aaron. That piece tells the truth in as unbiased away as it can be. It’s not untrue.”

“But it’s not your business to tell!”

“It is when you treated me the way you did.”

“I treated you nicely, Frank. Up until you cheated on me,” Aaron says, eyes looking evil and scaring Frank just the tiniest bit.

He winces at the word ‘cheated’ but decides to ignore it for a moment, “you treated me nicely, but not where it counts. You were never genuinely good to me, Aaron. Sure you didn’t do your worst, but you were never a good boyfriend.”

“How could I be a good boyfriend to someone who wasn’t giving me a damn thing in return? All you ever did was sit there and talk about Gerard. You never brought anything to the table. You were just boring.”

“Then why does it hurt you so much that I left?” Frank asks bitingly. Aaron fumbles for a moment, looking astounded by the question, but he soon masks it by drawing together his eyebrows.

“You cheated, Frank.”

“I made a mistake when I kissed Gerard while I was dating you, but I didn’t cheat. I never meant to hurt you. I stopped the relationship because I didn’t want to hurt you. That was the last thing I wanted to do, but you wouldn’t listen. You wouldn’t understand what I meant when I said that I love Gerard, and always have loved Gerard. It was never you, Aaron. It was never you who I was in love with, it’s always been him. When I broke up with you, it wasn’t to hurt you, it was to save you from wasting your time and being hurt. I knew I wanted to be with Gerard. Not you. I broke up with you when I knew I could have what I wanted. I really did try to spare your feelings, but what did you do? You threw a bowl at me.”

“You deserved it.”

“No he didn’t!” Gerard interrupts for the first time. Frank had all but forgotten about Gerard standing there. He’s standing to the right of the front door with his eyebrows screwed up in anger that matches the expression on Aaron’s face.

“Shut up,” Aaron says, disregarding Gerard’s words. 

Frank sighs, “The fact of the matter is, Aaron, that article exists now. You have to deal with the consequences that your actions have brought. You got yourself into this by acting like a jerk. You could have left the game with honor, but instead you decided to be a sore loser, and you’ve gotten yourself into this.”

“You’re such a bitch, Frank!” Aaron says.

“Oh right,” Gerard interrupts again, “it’s okay for you to try ruining Frank’s life, but when _he_ tries to ruin _yours_ it’s all of a sudden not okay?”

“Would you shut up?” Aaron says, turning to look at Gerard.

“No, because you’re behaving like such a child! You didn’t have to do what you did to Frank. A gracious bowing out was on the table but instead you made it impossible for Frank to get a job. Now you’re a scandal and that’s what you consider to be messed up? You sicken me.”

“Gerard, watch it,” Frank says, because he doesn’t trust Aaron in the slightest around Gerard.

“Listen to Frank.”

Gerard rolls his eyes, “You keep disregarding my existence like you think Frank has a fucking choice who he fell in love with, but he doesn’t. He likes me. Not you. Me. I’m not telling you something you don’t already know. This is the nature of the world that you have to accept.”

Time seems to freeze for a long moment as a decisive, and almost palpable slap fills the room. Gerard stumbles back, bringing a hand up to cup his cheek as Frank just stands there, trying to figure out if what he thinks just happened is what actually just happened.

When the dots start to connect in his head, that’s when Frank feels the real anger pump through him. He’s quite sure that never in his entire life has he ever been this furious with anyone. Really though, how _dare_ Aaron?

How dare Aaron to come into someone else’s home uninvited and then smack a guy who didn’t even do anything wrong. Frank is seeing red, and he’s feeling his face heat up in rage. He’s either going to explode or turn into the Incredible Hulk, and he’s not sure which.

“You did not just slap my boyfriend you fucking moron,” Frank exasperates. “God, and you wonder why I broke up with you?”

Aaron turns back to Frank, while Gerard edges to stand next to the wall. He makes his way around Aaron carefully, and stands behind Frank. Not as protection, but so that he can watch the interaction take place. Gerard’s face feels numb, like someone injected Novocain into his cheek. It doesn’t hurt exactly, but it stings strangely.

Aaron gives him a face like he’s not at all impressed by Frank’s words, or Gerard’s apparent cowardliness. 

“You know what, asshole?” Frank asks, stepping closer to Aaron, “I love him, and I don’t love you and there ain’t a thing you can do about that. You can slap him all you want, I’d advise you not to if you want to wake up tomorrow with genitalia, but you will not change me. You cannot change my opinion of Gerard, or of you, or of anything. I love _him_ , not you.”

“You think you’re so high and mighty, but there you are walking around like you’re better than me. I’m not the one who cheated.”

“Fucking hypocrite, yes you fucking did! Maybe not with me, but you have cheated before, liar. But you probably don’t remember or consider when that happened because it wasn’t you that was being hurt by the lying and the backstabbing. No, you only care if it effects you, Aaron! You only give a shit when it’s you. It’s always about you!”

“Well why would it be about you?”

“What?” Frank asks.

“Why would it be about you? Which one of us is successful? Which one of us has more than twelve pennies in a piggybank? You’re no one, Frank. No one cares about you! No one gives a crap about the poor little cheater who doesn’t have a job or any ounce of fame to his name. You are even less than nothing without me, Frank. You’re just another menial wannabe that no one is ever going to give the time of day!”

Frank snaps.

He doesn’t try to, and he isn’t even aware of himself doing anything until he just goes for it. Frank’s like a ghost in his own body, he’s aware of the part where he punches Aaron directly in the nose, and he’s aware of his hand throbbing out in pain afterwards, but he’s not aware of when he made the decision to actually hit the guy.

Frank didn’t just slap the guy either, that is no sting on the cheek. Frank just fucking punched the guy’s nose like he was looking for blood. Frank didn’t know he was capable of hitting someone like that, nor is he aware that he was even strong enough to do it.

Frank may not have been aiming to really hurt the guy, be he realizes a moment after it’s happened that he might have just broken Aaron’s nose. That wasn’t on purpose, he didn’t mean to do that. He doesn’t regret it, not by a long shot, but he feels a little baffled at the fact that he just did that. Frank hasn’t ruled out the possibility that he’s possessed right now though.

All Frank knows is that Aaron lifts his hand up to his nose seconds after Frank’s fist makes contact with his face, and then there’s blood. Either Frank gave him a bloody nose or he really did just break the guy’s nose. He doesn’t know how to feel about it, if not proud.

“Whoa, Frank!” Gerard says behind him and he turns to give Gerard a dumbstruck shrug.

“Uh,” Frank finally finds his voice and looks around, because he does not want Aaron to bleed onto their floor, and also, it’s kind of extremely gross. He’s not a big fan of blood. It’s not going to make him pass out or anything, but that’s real blood. That’s not fake zombie blood or action movie blood, that’s the real stuff that actually was inside a person at one point. He finds it kind of freaky that he could cause someone to bleed that much real blood. 

Frank scrambles for a dishtowel by the sink and then throws it at Aaron, who’s still standing there, kind of just numb or not aware of what’s going on. He’s aware at least enough to catch the towel before it falls to the ground, but he’s not much more conscious than that.

“I didn’t...” Frank drifts off, but he decides not to finish his sentence, because the thing is, he _doesn’t_ regret anything. Frank isn’t one for violence, never has been, but god does he feel good about socking that fucker in the face.

Frank just takes a deep breath and crosses his arms across his chest. “Don’t you dare disrespect my worth, Aaron. Don’t you dare.”

“You punched me!” Aaron says, which is stating the obvious a bit. Frank doesn’t see why he needs to point out something that’s very clear. Also, of course Frank knows he punched Aaron, he’s the one who did it.

“Yeah, I did. I’d say sorry, but I know you don’t like when I lie to you. Now, Aaron, get out of my house, you twat faced fuck, and prepare yourself for every fucking lawsuit I can file against you. Harassment, battery, hopefully some variety of a restraining order, whatever. Just get the fuck out of my house, and never come back!”

“I’m the one with the high-end lawyers, Frank,” Aaron says, trying to sound threatening but it’s hard to be intimidating when you have a dishrag to your face.

“Yeah, but I’m the one with the hot boyfriend, and that’s what you want from me in the first place, isn’t it?” Frank says with a painfully sugared down voice. He shoos Aaron back and out of the apartment like he’s a common pigeon. Frank’s not getting his dishtowel back, but he doesn’t care. When Aaron is out of the apartment enough for him to close the door, Frank waves a hand at him, flips him off, and then slams the door in his face.

“Oh god is it bad that I found that hot?” Gerard asks as soon as the door closes in front of Aaron.

“Did you see how pissed he was?” Frank asks turning around and grinning at Gerard, “he looked like he was really bothered by that article! Like we really did get to him! Either we just pissed him off and I’m never going to be employed again or we might have done what we said out to do!”

“I hope it’s the second one,” Gerard says.

“Me too!” Frank says, still grinning, and then he steps forward to grab both of Gerard’s hands in his own. “I’m sorry he hit you.”

“I’m glad you hit _him_ ,” Gerard says with a shrug, “I wish I’d gotten a chance to swing at the guy though.”

“You’re so sweet,” Frank says, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, you love me,” Gerard giggles.

“Remind me why,” Frank says, shaking his head. He looks up at Gerard and bites his own lip despite himself. The side of his cheek is slightly red, it’s not that bad, and it’ll probably fade in a minute or two, but Frank feels kind of guilty. It’s stupid, because he’s not the one who hit Gerard, but he’s the one who feels guilty about it.

“You’re stupid,” Gerard says, as either a response or just a statement, and then leans down to kiss Frank.

Frank’s a little curious as to whether the confrontation between him and Aaron was a resolution or not. It felt like it might have been. Maybe Aaron is gone for good or maybe he’s not. Maybe Frank will be rid of the guy. Hopefully. He’s not sure. Whatever the case turns out to be, at least he’s fighting back. He’s not just sitting there like a limp fish waiting for someone to take advantage of him, he’s actually giving Aaron something to go up against rather than sitting in the corner and throwing a temper tantrum about it.

“Do you think this is the end?” Frank asks.

“I don’t know,” Gerard says, “but in any case, I’ll be here with you throughout all of it.”

“You’re the most painfully adorable person I know.”

“Adorable? I’m not hot?”

“The two aren’t mutually exclusive,” Frank replies.

There’s a knock on the door and Frank’s stomach falls, because he’d thought for sure Aaron had gone. What with his nose bleeding and all, it seemed the logical thing for Aaron to do, and yet, _someone’s_ at the door.

“What do you want?” Frank yells at the door confrontationally.

“Well that’s not a very nice way to answer the door,” a voice, not Aaron’s, shouts back.

“Mikey?” Gerard asks, looking curious as to what the hell Mikey is doing outside their apartment. He just shrugs, and walks past Frank, though he doesn’t look happy about it.

He opens the door to Mikey, standing against the door frame like he’s been waiting there for several years.

“I think someone got murdered in your hall, there’s blood on the floor,” Mikey says.

“Well at least it’s not on the dance floor,” Frank says. He’s still standing in the middle of the apartment. He’s taken to looking down at his hand, which is still kind of stinging from hitting Aaron, and he’s sure that it’s going to bruise. Bruises aren’t forever though, so he doesn’t really care.

“No one got murdered, Frank just punched Aaron in the face,” Gerard says nonchalantly.

Mikey looks at Gerard with a questioning expression and then over at Frank. He probably doesn’t believe that Frank could hit a guy, but it’s not like Frank is actually made out of glass. He can defend himself, even if no one thinks he can. They probably underestimate him because he’s only a foot tall. Or at least, it feels that way to Frank.

“What are you doing here anyway?” Gerard asks.

“Oh, we’re just going to brush over the part where Frank punched a guy? Forgive me for wondering.”

“It’s not that complicated a story. I just punched him,” Frank says, “it was payback for that bowl he threw at my face. And for him slapping Gerard.”

“Aaron did what to Gerard?” Mikey asks.

“No, don’t worry, I’ve got someone to protect me,” Gerard says grinning at Frank.

“You’re going to have the midget protect you?” Mikey asks.

“I thought Patrick was the midget,” someone says from the hall, and they all look towards the door to realize that they forgot to close it.

“I am not a midget!” Patrick replies to the voice that just so happens to have belonged to Pete.

“You’re both midgets,” Mikey says.

“Pete is the same height as me!” Frank yells.

“I am not,” Pete replies, “I am definitely like a fraction of an inch taller.”

“What even _is_ this argument?” Gerard says.

“Why are so many people in our apartment?” Frank asks, “Gerard, close the door before someone else tries to get in!”

Gerard nods and walks behind Patrick and Pete to close the door. They’re all just hanging about like they own the place, which Gerard does not appreciate. He’s the one who pays the rent. Well, Frank does to, but Patrick, Pete, and Mikey all look too familiar in the place considering they don’t even live there.

“Mikey, you came in unannounced first, why are you here?”

“I just read the article,” Mikey says, “no one told me it was coming out! I had to hear about it from the news.”

“The what?” Frank asks.

“The news,” Mikey replies, “your story is on channel four.”

“Our story is on what?”

“You guys are on the news?” Patrick asks, “That’s so cool! Why didn’t you tell us?”

“We found out same as you, five seconds ago!” Frank says, “And also you _just_ got here.”

“Why are you two here anyway?” Gerard asks.

“When are we not here?” 

“That’s a valid point,” Frank says.

“I want to see the story on the news,” Pete says, walking past them and grabbing the TV remote.

“It’s eight in the morning, I don’t even want to be awake right now and I have to entertain company of two dunderheads and my brother who’s an even bigger dunderhead?”

“It doesn’t take much to be bigger than them though,” Mikey says, “I mean, we have established that they’re all tiny human beings.”

“I found it!” Pete says, after playing with the channels a bit. “Oh you got the reporter with the blisteringly white teeth.”

“Did we?” Frank asks, looking over at the TV. “Cool. Hey Gerard! Our story is being reported on by the reporter with the fake teeth! I bet they glow under black light like in that one episode of Friends.”

“Can we get back to real life?” Gerard asks, “I want to go to bed, so Patrick, you and Pete had better have some fucking big news or you are going to leave my apartment. And you can take Mikey with you.”

“I resent that.”

“You were meant to.”

“Why are you here then?” Frank interrupts, looking at Patrick and Pete, “and why was Pete so mysterious about it yesterday.”

“Well we weren’t really sure what we were doing yesterday,” Patrick says, “still kind of in the phase of uncertainty.”

“What was?”

“Oh well, see the thing is that we’ve just been thinking recently,” Pete says, “What with the fact that you and Gerard are together now, we were just, like, thinking...”

“Yeah you said that already,” Frank says, “but you haven’t explained anything!”

“Well,” Patrick says, “we were just thinking that you two have gotten together, and Pete and I are pretty sure that we’re going to be together indefinitely so we were thinking, in probably the least romantic of settings, we didn’t do it properly, but that’s not the point. The point is that we only have one direction to move and that’s forward. So, we’re going to get married.”

“You’re going to what?” Gerard asks.

“You heard me,” Patrick says, “We’ve been together almost four years. We think it’s time.”

“Wait, so who proposed?” Frank asks.

“We didn’t really do that part,” Pete confesses, “like he said, it was unromantic to the point of obscenity, but it’s not the proposal that matters it’s the person.”

“That’s such a vanilla way to excuse the fact that you don’t have a romantic story for parties,” Frank answers. Frank shakes his head and looks around and then it catches up to him what they actually just said and he lights up.

“Oh, right, sorry. Congratu-fucking-lations. I know that’s a sarcastic term, but I mean it guys!” Frank says, and opens his arms, “bring it in guys. Let’s hug it out.”

“I’m not hugging you, Frank,” Mikey says.

Frank pretends to mope as he wraps his arms around Patrick, who is an unsurprisingly fantastic hugger. The dude could bottle and sell his hugs for fifty bucks a pop.

“Awww, you’re gonna be all domestic and shit!” Gerard says, smiling. “That’s so exciting!”

“We think so,” Patrick says when he lets go of Frank.

“Now what was this about not wanting to hug me,” Frank says, looking at Mikey. He takes a step towards Mikey, as he takes a step back in unison with Frank.

“You get any closer and I will fill your refrigerator with bees,” Mikey warns him.

“But bees are essential to human survival,” Frank says, getting closer.

“Fine. Wasps.”

“Come here, Way.”

“No, gross!” Mikey says dodging Frank, as Frank tries to contain his laughter at how stupid Mikey is. Gerard’s busy talking to Pete and Patrick about the thoroughly massive news of their fucking marriage while, for about two minutes, Mikey and Frank play a game of tag in the living room. Mostly it consists of Mikey on one side of the couch, avoiding Frank on the other, and then Frank jumping over the couch and Mikey runs away like he’s being chased by a horror movie villain. In reality, Gerard’s just really disappointed he doesn’t have a video camera.

“You know, when I was a little kid dreaming about getting married, I did not think it would be out trumped by two grown men playing cat and mouse,” Patrick says.

“That’s my brother and my boyfriend,” Gerard shakes his head, “What is my life? What?”

“Get off of me Frank!” Mikey shouts, and that’s how they know Frank’s won. 

“Not until I shower you with love!”

“This has got to be illegal. Stop hugging me, it’s disgusting!”

“Fucking hell,” Gerard rolls his eyes, “I am happy for you both, engagement that’s amazing news, really, but I cannot believe that that’s my boyfriend. You can’t choose your family, but why the hell did I choose _him_?”

“Why _did_ you choose him,” Mikey shrieks at Gerard, “this is the longest and most uncomfortable hug in all of history.”

“You are so fucking boney,” Frank says, “like, you’re going to poke my eye out with your shoulder.”

“That’s the plan.”

“Frank, get off of Mikey,” Pete says.

“Ugh, fine. He smells like nail polish remover anyway,” Frank says, and let’s go of Mikey who is all too happy to get the hell away from Frank. Though that’s what he gets for making a sarcastic comment directed at Frank.

“So a lot has happened today then,” Gerard says, “Pete and Patrick are getting married, Frank’s story is on the actual news, Mikey was attacked by a midget, and Frank broke a guys nose.”

“Frank did what to a guy’s nose?” Patrick asks.

“Oh, right, you missed the part where Aaron woke us up and then Frank punched him in the face.”

“Frank?” Patrick says, with a tone of disappointment, but he’s got a reluctant smile on his face like he totally agrees with Frank’s actions.

“Yeah, well,” Frank shrugs, “but let’s not forget about you two. We need to have a celebratory, uh, it’s eight in the morning? Celebratory breakfast! Food is on... well, food is on Gerard since I don’t have a job.”

“Did you just offer up my wallet?” Gerard asks Frank.

“Yes, they’re engaged, Gerard.”

“Yeah, but you don’t just volunteer a guy’s wallet without asking him first. I will pay for waffles though. Waffles or whatever. Patrick and Pete are getting married. Breakfast is the least I can offer.”

“I thought you wanted to go back to sleep,” Mikey points out.

“That was before I knew my best friends were getting married!”

“To each other,” Pete says, “We should clarify that, because we’re marrying each other. Not, like, other people.”

“Yes, Pete, I think they understood,” Patrick says. “Sorry about him, he’s not good at thinking when he’s got pancakes on the brain.”

“Well we can go, but I have to put on clothes. Gerard, you probably should too,” Frank says and then drags Gerard into their room.

They dress quickly, Gerard enthusing about how oddly exciting the day has been when it’s not even past nine in the morning yet. Frank pecks him on the cheek and agrees, because, yeah, it’s been one hell of a day already.

“You guys are taking too long!” Mikey calls to them. “I want my free food.”

“Me too,” Pete adds.

“Please?” Patrick finishes off.

“You guys are so impatient,” Frank says, hurrying out of the room a minute later. Gerard follows not long after, and Pete’s out the door almost immediately. The boy cares an awful lot about food. 

Frank is just about to follow him out when the phone rings and he groans, walking over to it. He wonders why the hell they still have a landline, but he picks it up all the same.

“Hello?” Frank asks. The four guys in the doorway all look at him with annoyance, and Frank just ignores their eyes glaring into him.

“Wait, seriously?” Frank asks, and they continue to glare at him with the same irritated expressions, but with a smattering of raised eyebrows as they wonder who Frank is talking to.

What seems like infinitely later, as they all stand in the doorway, Frank finally hangs up the phone and looks at the people who are looking back at him. His eyes train for a long time on Gerard and then breaks out into a wide grin.

Frank takes a moment to breathe for a moment before saying, “I just got offered a job.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that's it. Endings always make me sad. I love all of you guys for making it this far with me.


End file.
